Saturday, December 24, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
(Peter Watches "KISS Saves Santa" on TV Through A Window of A Electronics Store and The Clerk Takes It Away.)
Peter: Hey! I was watching that!
Clerk: Don't worry it'll be on next Christmas.
Peter: Who the hell knows when that's gonna be?!
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Friday, December 23, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
Lois: For me? Please?
Peter: All right, all right, but you owe me. Later, under the mistletoe, open mouth, no matter how drunk I am.

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Wednesday, December 21, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
Joe: Are you wearing a girl's sweater?
Brian: Does that really matter right now?
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Monday, December 19, 2005

   The Ultimate MK 1 and 2 Champ
When It Comes To Fighting My Friends in MK: Deadly Alliance and MK: Deception, I Get My Ass Whooped. But When It Comes To The Original Mortal Kombat and Mortal Kombat II, I Am Supreme! I Whooped My Friends Asses in Them. It Felt Awesome To Finally Beat Them In MK Games.
Liu Kang Wins
Flawless Victory
FATALITY
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   Daily Family Guy Quote
Peter: What the hell did you do?
Brian: Me? Who the hell buys a novelty fire extinguisher?
Peter: I'll tell you who. Someone who cares enough about physical comedy to put his whole family at risk
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Sunday, December 18, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
Lois: Brian, you're not wearing the sweater I made you.
Brian: Well, y'know, it's a little warm in here...
Lois: "Don we now our gay apparel."
(Brian puts the sweater on.)
Brian: It doesn't get any gayer than this.

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Saturday, December 17, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
Peter: As we all know, Christmas is that mystical time of year when the ghost of Jesus rises from the grave to feast on the flesh of the living! So we all sing Christmas Carols to lull him back to sleep.
Bob: Outrageous, How dare he say such blasphemy. I've got to do something.
Man #1: Bob, there's nothing you can do.
Bob: Well, I guess I'll just have to develop a sense of humor.

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Friday, December 16, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
Diane Simmons: Tom, I'm getting late word that you're a petty, jealous closet-case.
Tom Tucker: Bit of breaking news, we now go live to Diane being a bitch. Diane.
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Thursday, December 15, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
(At the Quahog county trailer park)
Brian: You're really going to take back donated presents on Christmas Eve?
Peter: Yep, now here's the plan: You'll enter through the air contitioning duct here. Now there'll be an invisible laser grid three inches from the floor, so you'll have to compress your body to the size of an ordinary household sponge and slide underneath like some kind of weird amphibious dolphin.
Brian: Can I buy some pot from you?

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Wednesday, December 14, 2005

   Daily Family Guy Quote
Lois: And you know what? I'm gonna take that chance my father never let me take when I was younger. I'm gonna become a model!
Peter: Hey, that's fantastic, Lois! And I'll pleasure myself to your photos.
Chris: Me too!
Meg: Me too!
Peter: Oh! Oh! God! Meg! That's sick! That's your mother!
Meg (shrugs): I'm just trying to fit in.
Peter: Get out! Get out of this house!
(Meg doesn't move. Peter punches wall.)
Peter: I SAID GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE NOW!
(Meg runs out and Peter closes the door.)
Peter: That's a good about your modeling, Lois.

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