Sunday, April 30, 2006

   ...

Letting go isn't giving up, It's accepting that it wasn't meant to be. Sometimes, it's better to let go instead of letting your heart die in front of your eyes. We may not be the same 2 people, but we can't deny that we were the best of friends. WERE But once you let go, you know you did the right thing. You know that neither of you are suffering. You know that both of you are happy.

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Saturday, April 8, 2006

   Sigh

*Sigh* I know that things are over but hey, time moves. I think I'll live, at least I think I will. Friendship DOESN'T last forever. And whoever made up that phrase is an effing fucker.

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Saturday, March 18, 2006

   YAY!!!

YAY!! FINALLY! I AM OFF TO FLORIDA YO! lol, yay, sooooo happy! week of vacation is good for the peace of mind and all. YAY!! HAPPINESS IS SURGING THROUGH MY BODY. LMFAO!!

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Sunday, March 12, 2006

   I have to...

I will fight to the end. I have to fight to the end. I have to keep a smile on. I have to act happy. I have to keep to my promises. I have to stay myself. No matter what happens, the only thing I can do is keep a smile on. My friendship is what has kept me on this world. If I break it, I won't be here anymore, the best I can do is to smile, even if it's fake.

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Saturday, March 11, 2006

   I don't know what i would do.

Sigh. I hate my life. There is nothing worth living for in my life anymore. I've lost the love of my life to my best friend. My best friend is oblivious to my feelings. She thinks that I've actually given up on him, which I have, sort of. I want to tell him I love him, but he has already proclaimed his love for her. I don't have many people who will support me or help me on my dilemna, so this is a thank you to those who posted to my..post. It raised my mood but for only a minute, but it's the best feeling I've had in a while, so thank you. ^^

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   I think im in a state of depression.

I'm not sure if i'm actually depressed or not but i know that i haven't been myself lately. And since i have no one to talk to about it, i shall talk about it. So, this guy that i really liked asked me to dance at a valentines dance. Turns out that it was only a pity dance and that he only danced with me because he knew i liked him but didn't want to hurt my feelings. It also turned out that he liked my best friend. That made this stupid arguement even worse than it already was. They are now dating, but it has only been a few weeks but i know i still love him but i dont have the guts to tell my friend that. She really likes him too. And i can't blame either of them for loving the other, love is a natural thing that just occurs. I've always tried never to get attached to anything so that this kind of dilemna never happened. But i guess it's one of those "unavoidable" things. I've cried so much over him and no one knows it, all they are concerned are is that i put up a smile to show that i "support" them. I want them to be happy, don't get me wrong, i really want them to be happy, but don't I deserve to be happy at least once? I've given up so many guys because they all liked her, and all she did was say no to them, and the one guy that i wanted to be my boyfriend, she took. She didn't even tell me that she loved him, she lied and said she liked some other guy. I don't know why I'm putting all this here, I guess it is because i have no one to tell it too. I'm just that lonely I guess. Maybe i should take my brothers advice and become a nun....

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