Wednesday, June 15, 2005

The AT Field's down! Repeat, the AT Field is down!
So, Main Event taught me that sometimes... I'm not good at being the center of attention. I'm just not the best at dealing with my emotions, I think.

Heh, I love bragging about my endless ego, but I guess it acts as a barrier agianst insults as much as a barrier for my inability to be personal with people. Tolarin does well as leader of groups, ranter and raver of things nerdy and obscure... but when it comes to being personal... I either fail miserbably at it, or seem weird.

I mean, anytime I try to be serious... suddenly, it's Tolarin's not being fun. And many people tell me this... but ya know, when I do act quiet and serious, it's kind of my attempt to be you know, serious about something. It means something to me.

So yes, even the infalliable Tolarin ego has it's own problems. I'm not in too much of a bad/sad mood... I'm okay, I'm just kinda oddly introspective. I guess I act too hyper, you know? I should try to show my emotions and be more personal with people, lest I suprise them with it. *laughs and shrugs* Guess I do that...

Got my hair cut. It's cut way too short for my tastes. Not to say it's cut short... but it's shorter then I'd like. Not to say my hair's short... but meh... I'm not very fond of it right now.

Also, I want to go see Batman Begins. Badly. Or is that batly? Sounds like a most batass movie! Okay, no more bat jokes. But seriously, you'd be crazy as a bat not to wanna go see it!

And yeah, I guess that's my update!
Comments (4) | Permalink

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Hmmm.... A-Kon was a lot of fun! I met a whole bunch of people this con! Uh, I'm not going to into any great detailed epic today... maybe one of these days... I really had a lot of fun hanging out with folks, raving, and all that jazz... didn't drink, amusingly enough... and yeah!

Apparently, I have a stalker? Wow, I wish I knew that... I could always use the ego boost! *laughs*

And um... yeah, ciao folks!

Comments (1) | Permalink

Monday, May 30, 2005

Wipeout!
So, this weekend's been crazy. First we had the whole costume making thing at Levi's house, which admitadly, I'm utterly useless at. I wish I could help out, but I have ZERO ranks in Crafting. I did feel pretty darn useless. So, I just played Space Channel 5 Part 2 and CvS2 with folks... wish I had more to say on that front but yeah... not much I really can, right?

Sunday, I headed out with my mom to her friends' lake house. I got to kayak and also got to ride a jet ski for the first time ever. Found out I could get it to abou 63 mph on the lake. Pretty bad ass. Also found out I could wipe out at 40 mph. Came out of that with a bruised foot. All in all, it was helluva fun!

A-Kon's coming up! I think it's gonna be pretty damn cool! In all actuallity, I don't care for the actual con anymore... as much as seeing all my friends. Kinda sucks that Greg/Galena won't be there... but I do get to hang out with everyone else, and show off my new Sasuke costume.

Hmmm... I should try to learn how to make costumes though. I think I should spend some XP points on ranks in crafting. It'd be a fun summer project to take up... yes, indeedy....

Uh, not much else beyond that. Helena's cosplay sounds bad ass... I may just be a wee bit biased. *laughs* Our cosplay is gonna be retarded... Narutarded! And uh... yeah! Hope I can hang out with people in the days to come, if not then... then at A-Kon itself!

Comments (3) | Permalink

Monday, May 23, 2005

D&D Eberron Story - Rough Draft - Chapter 1
Well, this is a rough draft of the first chapter of the story I'm writting based off our D&D campaign. Obviously, this stuff is mostly material NOT in the game session. Next chapter begins detailing most of the events of our first session. There is a bit more work to be done, and I'm hoping I got the characterization down. In some cases, I didn't have enough characterization... so I had to sort of make it up, or base it off the player. (There is also one point where I still don't have an idea of where exactly Azrieal comes from. This shall be taken care of when I talk with Levi about the choices I have for him.) Without further ado, the first chapter!

Eberron Campaign Story

Chapter 1 - Action! Adventure! And then some...

He had expected to see his mother at graduation. His
father not showing up wasn't expected. The young half elf was
dressed in full regalia, that expected of a young noble of House
Lyrandaar. A long coat with blues and greys intricately woven into
a shifting pattern of color by glammerweave threads. A velvet
vest with silken shirt beneath it, with a nearly glowing necklace
with the House signet dangling in front of his chest. While the
young man was used to looking as if a class of his own, he was
not used to looking so over the top. It was as his mother wished
of course.
The young man pushed the long silver-blue hair out from
in front of his eyes, watching as the line leading up to the Dean
of Mongrave University. He was a bit fidgety, as he watched the
other graduating students step up onto the stage, a great open-
air amphatheater that stood atop one of the great spires of
Sharn. Parents from all over Khoravire had gathered to watch
their students graduate from the university. Mixed in the crowd
of parents were also quite a many untold patrons of the various
Dragonmarked Houses, and other institutions of learning and
adventuring. The graduation wasn't as much a ceremony for the
students, as much as a display of potential new allies, minions,
and bids for power among the houses and organizations that acted
in Sharn and through all of Khoravire.
The young half elf grinned, his emerald green eyes
turning towards his mother in the audience. To her, this was all
a show to prove that she had produced a potential heir of at
least some competence. The only reason he was even graduating
today and meant anything to her was because of the mark that had
manifested upon his back.
"Tolarin d' Lyrandaar," the Dean called out as the
student that had been in front of him had walked down the stairs
and off the stage. The Dean held a new paper in hand, and looked
to the young half elf for him to accept his diploma.
Tolarin smiled, speaking under his breath, "Time to use
that charisma of yours..." He began to take dignified steps up
the stage to accept his diploma from the Dean. There was a roar
of clapping as Tolarin walked onto the stage, from his fellow
peers, to those who knew of his status. For many students, while
suspected of being something "special", it was the first time
they knew Tolarin as one of the Dragonmarked, and not just some
half-elf of a degree of wealth. He came to the Dean and nodded
his head, accepting the diploma, and holding it out to the
audience, bowing to them and to the Dean, shaking his hand
firmly. One last smile to both the audience and the dean, and
Tolarin began to walk off the stage.
Wrapped up, the diploma was meant to signify Tolarin's
knowledge in Ancient History and Cultures, but the scroll held no
real meaning to the young half-elf. He knew it was only for show.
Something to prove that he was worth something to the House
Lyrandaar.
Tolarin joined his mother, glancing at her one moment,
her attention still upon the stage. He looked towards the stage
as well, letting the night slide on.
"You don't look like you're packing up to come home," a
voice said from behind Tolarin in his room. Tolarin turned to see
his father, "So I would assume you have other plans."
Tolarin glanced at the note lying on his table, bearing
the House insignia upon it, a letter of congratulations from his
mother... most likely with all the noble trimmings and nothing of
her feelings or personal thoughts. Tolarin hadn't opened it, nor
did he intend to.
"You're mother wants you to come home. I'm pretty certain
she wouldn't be happy to see this," his father said, scratching
his head. Taris d'Lyrandaar was a rugged man, in a long worn
brown duster and a leather armor. He had long dark blue hair and
bright blue eyes. He rubbed his chin, "But then, she isn't
around, now is she?"
Tolarin laughed a bit, "Where were you? I didn't see you
at my graduation."
"I was here, I just couldn't stand being around your
mother and her entourage. I found a spot, perhaps a little less
nice then what your mother had, but at least I didn't have to
politely clap and act like I cared about any other students."
"Heh," Tolarin chuckled, "I'm not sure if I should take
that as a compliment or not."
"Just pretend it is," his father said, "So if you aren't
going to return home, then what do you plan on doing?"
Tolarin sort of shrugged, taking off his jacket, "I
haven't fully decided yet. I could sign on to some adventuring
group. I wouldn't mind heading back to Xen'Drik."
Taris nodded, "So you're thinking of just being reckless
until either you die, your mother tracks you down, or your become
amazingly rich. Or burn out. Whichever comes first?"
The young half-elf scratched the back of his head, "Well,
that's not the way I would put it. I mean, I have a few ideas
brewing in my head."
Taris shook his head, "What are you going to do without
me, Tolarin?" He handed Tolarin a letter, and headed to the door,
"One of my friends was looking for some adventurers to look into
some news down in the lower levels of Sharn. I don't know all the
details, but it should get you some money, give you something to
do, and it's at least some fashion of a direction for you." Taris
opened the door, then turned back and took a package that sat
next to Tolarin's door, handing it to him, "You might like this
as well."
Tolarin took the package and opened it up, pulling out a
sword, with a blue and green scabbard, with a nicely crafted
emerald and metal hilt. Tolarin pulled the rapier from the
scabbard, "It's a masterpiece."
"Well, it is a good sword. Fitting for you, I would
think," Taris said, laughing a bit, "I had my smith make me one
for you. I thought it was time for you to have your own sword. If
you're going to really get into this adventuring thing, then you
are gonna need a good sword at your side." Taris touched the two
rapiers at his side, "Maybe two?"
Tolarin laughed a bit, "I'll keep it with me always."
"You better take good care of it. You can find the
sharpening stones and polishing kits in the bottom of the box.
You best take good care of that sword. It is a good rapier. Well
balanced."
"You have my word, father!"
Taris waved as he began to walk out the door, "Also, I
booked a meeting with one of my smiths for your armor. You'll
find the info in that letter for you. Heh, I'll keep your mother
off you for a bit. Good luck!"
"Thanks..." Tolarin laughed a bit, watching his father
walk away, and closing the door to look back at the sword. Just
beyond it was the letter from his mother. He picked it up and
threw it into the trash, never looking back at it.

****

The rugged man walked with his head held high, not out of
pride, but out of amazement. Since they had passed First Tower,
his focus had been on the high spires of the city of Sharn. His
silver hair blew in the wind as his amber eyes crossed each of
the spires that stretched high into the skies of the City of
Towers.
"This is your first time in Sharn, isn't it?" A young
woman next to him spoke. She had a wide smile on her face, her
eyes glued to the rugged warrior. She laughed a bit, "The towers
go up, and up, and up! You can get really dizzy if you're not
careful."
Azrieal nodded, looking around him. The two fighters were
riding upon a small launch that seemed to sail through the sky.
He wasn't entirely sure he felt safe upon the boat, but his
partner seemed at home on the ship.
Lim Papaya was laughing as she looked off the edge of the
ship, looking down the towers and great bridges that crossed
them. The young woman had light black hair with brown strands in
it, slender and short in stature, with a finely tuned body ready
for battle. Her face however, wasn't that of a hardened warrior,
but a cheerful young woman... not much older then her late teens.
She laughed a bit, playing with her hair, as her bangs fluttered
in the wind.
"Is it safe for you to sit near the edge?" The man spoke,
more matter of factly then out of concern.
Lim shrugged, laughing a bit, "It's safe. I've ridden on
these sky boats countless number of times. You don't need to
worry about me."
The warrior shrugged, looking up agian as the towers of
Sharn passed him overhead. Lim took a deep breath, her cheeks
puffing out a bit, turning away from him and looking in a
different direction.

The Sky Boat docked at one of the towers of Sharn, the
pilot saying a few magic words, and the winds that bellowed
around the ship died off. "We've arrived at the Tyris Tower. Fare is 4
gold pieces."
"4 gold pieces?!" Azrieal stood up, gripping his sword,
glaring at the pilot.
"Azri," Lim said, standing up to diffuse the situation,
"it was better to pay 4 gold then to walk all the way here. Don't
worry, I'll pay the man his goldies... You just get off the ship,
okay?"
The man grumbled as he stepped off the ship. Lim quickly
and politely paid the pilot, giving him a little extra as she
turned to quickly follow Azrieal.
The two fighters had gotten together only a few months
ago. Azrieal had a sort of lack of luck, and that lack had a
tendency to be projected outwards as well. Lim on the other hand,
seemed to have luck on her side. The young woman found the dark
man intriguing, at the very least. Ever since, they had been
adventuring together. At the least, Azrieal found her assistance
to be helpful in the tasks he under took, most of which had a
tendency to "allow" him to resort to using his trust blade.
Lim hopped at the great arch of the tower that stood
before them, "Could you hurry up just a bit? I don't want to be
late!"
Azrieal sighed a bit as he came to the arch, "Could you
calm down just a bit."
"I got my first jobs here. How can I calm down? If we
want goldies, we're gonna have to get work, right? And I can get
us work!" Lim laughed a bit, shaking her fist, "You don't have a
better idea, do you?"
He shook his head, looking away, "Go ahead, lead me on.
We better be able to beat heads in."

****
The young man's thick heavy robes swayed as he moved
through the library of Mongrave University. He came upon one of
many archways, holding a crystal stone, looking in. It was a dark
chamber, save for a work desk with a recess. He stepped through
the archway, upon an arcane circle, placing the glyphstone down
upon the recess. It lit brightly, casting a blue light upon the
chamber, the archway sealing up. The darkness around him suddenly
began to spin and swirl, and book cases began to circle around
him. Even with his arcane training, the magical power that flowed
around him amazed him. He looked down a bit, the dizzying power
making even his understanding of reality pale.
The bookcases finally came into place around him. His eyes
rose back upon the bookcases. He looked across the spines of the
books, magical theories written by the sages of Sharn and
Breland. Melchia set the books down, opening them up, his grey
eyes browsing the pages.
He pushed his hand through is thick, rough, brown hair.
His skin wasn't as pale of other of his profession, most of his
experience was gained through trial instead of pure book study,
much to the annoyance of his mentor.
Melchia groaned a bit, as he put aside the first book,
and picked up the next one.
The young Karrathan wizard stepped out of the University,
sighing a bit, as he looked over to the large ceremony occurring
on one of the towers of the University. Many, many, people were
gathered, as lights from floating platforms shot down upon a
stage.
"Must be graduation," Melchia shook his head, and began
to walk down the large bridge that spanned across the spires of
Sharn. "So useless."
He came to a stop about halfway across the bridge, coming
to the edge of it, putting his hands on the ornate railing of the
bridgeway. The city went straight up and down for nearly a mile,
it seemed. Below, led to the dark layers of the city, to
mysteries of anicent times of Khoravire. Whereas, above, there
were floating neighborhoods, magical flying roadways, and endless
advances in high magic. Almost more then any other city in
Khoravire, Sharn was a place of nearly all magic. It wasn't
specialized, or inhibited by a doctrine, or bound to a particular
flavor of magic. All variety of magic could be found in the city,
and it was here, that he felt he could create the solid
foundation towards his understanding of magic that he sought for.
He turned away and began walking once more to the next
tower.
"So, you have no maps to any of the ruins of Sharn?"
Melchia asked, a little bit shocked.
The artificer shook his head, "I mainly deal in artifacts
coming in from Xen'drik. The cogs of Sharn do no interest me in
the ways that the magical technologies of Xen'drik do."
"Oh?" Melchia said, a bit interested, "What kind of
technologies?"
"Very strange, technology that with only little
modification works with our own. I've heard stories of anicent
technology that is compatible with our Warforged technology."
"The same basic principles, eh?" The artifcer nodded.
Just then, a hulking form of armor came walking into the
room, it's dull red eyes looking upon the two, a bit sullen in
it's speech, "You know, I would perfer you not refer to me as
just some form of technology."
"Well," the artificer said, "You know I don't mean that.
But you have to admit, the idea that there is something similar
to you in Xen'drik must interest you."
The warforged, a sentient living construct of wood and
metal, nodded, "I may in fact be more then just mere technology."
Melchia rubbed his chin, "Perhaps. So, where might I find
more information on the underbelly and ruins of this city?"
"Hmmmm... well, I do have a friend who is looking for
some brave souls to delve deep into Dorasharn... how about I have
you meet him?"

****
Issac sat in his brown leather chair, turned away from
his desk, looking out into the endless spires that was Sharn. He
drew in the smoke of the burning smoking weed in his pipe,
letting the hot gas pour down into his lungs, holding it for a
moment and savoring the burning sensation until he let it out,
passing out in a puff of smoke that seemed to rise through the
spires.
The door to his office opened, and he slowly turned
around in his chair, facing his desk. His young half-elf
secretary was standing in the door, smiling to him, "Sir, as you
requested, I've looked through the applicants, and I believe I
have found four who will do quite nicely."
She laid four files down upon his desk. He held his pipe
in one hand, his other hand combed through his thick brown hair.
He opened the first file to see the traveling papers of a young
man from Karranth. His secretary filled in the details, "This
man's traveling through Sharn. From what I could gather from
Lancis, he's a young mage. He's shown interest in the ruins."
"Mage, eh?" Issac rubbed his chin, rough from a 5 o'clock
shadow, "He's not going to cause any trouble."
"He seems too young to cause any real trouble for us.
Yet."
Issac put aside the folder and opened the next one,
revealing sets of papers, for a young man by the name of Tolarin,
"Ah yes, Tolarin. Taris told me he would like him to work for me.
I think we can definitely give him a chance. Taris is a good man,
I can't believe his son to be any less."
Issac put Tolarin's file aside, and moved on to the next
one, opening it up to reveal another young man, a traveler from
(Eh, whatever country Azrieal comes from, most likely Doroam or the Shadow Marches. I have to speak with Levi about these ideas…). There were a few
additional notes of "incidents" he had gotten into with not only
Sharn's city watch, but other nations, "Oh, and who is this?"
"Azrieal. Lim brought him with her. She's the last
member. He's a little bit of a rough and tough character, but I
think he'll do good with the group."
Issac flipped through the last file, then set it down
with the other four, "This is the party you have for me, Ari?
Care to explain."
Ari smiled, her golden eyes and red hair giving her a
distinct head start advantage, "You need a group capable of
handling any sort of situation if you want them to accomplish
what you have planned. You have someone who's quick with their
mind, another who is quick with his words, someone who's charming
and keeps the group in check, and someone to fall back upon when
a strong stout blade is needed. For the task you need, this party
is perfect."
Issac chuckled a bit, "You're learning this game pretty
well. Alright, bring them in."

****
"As you have undoubtly guessed," Issac said, looking
between the crew assembled in his office, "We are a local office
of the Korrenberg Chronicle. We're mostly a freelance reporting
group. This gives us a great deal of freedom, but puts a good
deal of strain on us as well."
"We have the freedom of being independent from the main
offices. We do not have to answer to them. We are allowed to
cover the stories we wish, in the methods we wish. However, we
are not the only freelance journalism group out there. As such,
not only must we provide a quantity that is up to standards with
the Korrenberg Chronicle, we must also provide a quality."
Azrieal was looking at Lim, scowling a bit, "Journalism?
I'm no writer!" He grabbed the handle to his sword, making his
point all the more dramatic.
Tolarin looked at the brash warrior, "I do believe he's
not finished yet."
Issac nodded, "Journalism of the our sort isn't confined
to the desk. Writing from a desk only leads to boring stories,
deattached stories, stories that can not apply to the common man.
Our stories need to show the emotions of Khoravire and Sharn.
They must appeal to the people, while at the same time, inform
the people of what is going on around them."
"I do not believe in "desk journalism", I am a staunch
believer in field journalism. What I am looking for, is writing
that come from people on the front lines of the issues that make
up Sharn. This is not just writing the news. This is experiencing
it."
"This new, edgier, more modern style of journalism takes
a special kind of person. Or in this case, a certain type of
people. People who can investigate the news, who can talk with
the people, who can relate to the people, and can take action
when needed."
Melchia raised an eyebrow, "You call that journalism?"
"I call it realism," Issac said, pointing his pipe at the
young mage, "People want to know the full story, and the only way
we can truly tell them the full story is to immerse ourselves in
it."
Tolarin looked at Issac, "A new name for a classic band
of adventurers. Perhaps we should have a bard?"
Issac shook his head, "I believe this job is right up
your alley, if you choose to at least give me a chance to explain
it."
Tolarin held out his hands, "By all means."
"As long as I get to punch face," Azrieal muttered,
interupted by cursing as Lim kicked him in the shin.
"As you may know, Sharn has a sort of deep underbelly to
it. In this reigon, many of those unable to fit in with the
mainstream Sharn culture takes up residence. Lately, rumors have
begun to build of some goblinoid cult taking up residence in
Dorasharn. I believe this would make a good piece for the Sharn
section of the Korrenberg Chronicles, do you not think so?"
Tolarin nodded a bit, "Do you know anything about the
cult?"
"I do not. All I get is hear say. However, I do believe
that I know of a man who may be able to get you information.
Wonderlegs should be able to tell you anything you need to know
about this cult."
"So you have no idea of it's purpose, at all?" Melchia
said, looking at him, his eyes narrowed.
"I know that many of the residents of Dorasharn speak in
hushed tones and in fear of the cults, but beyond that... I know
little else."
Azrieal scoffed a bit, "And how much are we going to get
paid for this little errand?"
Issac nooded a bit, "400 gold each. A flat fee for your
services to our office."
Most of them seemed content, but Azrieal was taken a bit
back, "Only 400?! I best be able to kill these cultists."
"If harm should come to you, you will be able to use
whatever force you find necessary. Our office will back you up,
to a reasonable degree." Issac's words were pointed directly
towards the rash fighter.
He turned his head and laughed, "Fine, as long as I get
to kill things, I'll take on this job."
Tolarin shook his head a bit, laughing, then turned to
Issac, "Where can we find this Wonderlegs guy?"
"I'd look in the Rusty Spoon. It's his kind of tavern."
Issac said, taking a puff off his pipe, letting the smoke rise in
front of his face.
Tolarin shrugged, looking at his other party members,
"Well then, who's up to drinking?”


Comments (2) | Permalink

I've come to the conclusion that when you have bad news... it's much easiar to update your journal then when you have good news. You know? *laughs* I guess if you're in a perfectly good mood, there wouldn't be TOO much of a need to post in an online journal, right? *laughs*

I know there are exceptions to this case. For example, I'm in a pretty good mood now. I just think it's an amusing truth, a journal gets more updates when you're in a bad mood or sad. *laughs and shrugs*

On to the adventure!

So, as of Thursday night, I have black hair! *laughs* The Minty-one dyed it for me, and it looks pretty bad ass! It'll do really well for the whole cosplaying of Sasuke thing! And it's different for me! So yeah, totally cool!

I saw Star Wars Episode III on Wed Night, Thursday morning at the midnight showing. A few corny lines... but besides that, an excellent movie! Leaves you wanting more Star Wars though... The end of two nerd past times... Star Wars and Star Trek this month. (With that said, there is word of a Star Wars tv series in the works. So I guess that's not ENTIRELY true.)

Friday night, I saw Kung Fu Hustle. Now that was a fun movie. Really good comedic martial arts action film! It's written, directed, and starring Stephen Chow from Shaolin Soccer! It was totally worth it! I highly recomend checking out the movie!

Let's see, after that, Tommy Larsen, Phillip, Will, and the gang met at Larsen's house and we all played KoF and Halo. I finally am able to beat Phillip agian in KoF... Heh, I was starting to lose my ability to play KoF since I've been playing Naruto so much.

Saturday night, Mark, Levi, and Mint worked really hard on making my Sasuke costume! I wish I had that kind of skill! They really did a darn good job on the Sasuke shirt! It looks perfect! Really talented people, they are! Speak like Yoda, I know not why!

Last night, Larsen, Phillip and assorted crew met to play Halo CTF on Blood Gulgh last night. Tommy Hutcherson (The other guy in my avatar, the one holding the darn possum.), Phillip, and myself were on a team agianst Tommy Larsen, Will Collins, and Rodney. I may be good in Halo, but Phillip's a beast. Damn, tears through people. His skill in gaming is pretty damn phenominal. I have to practice continiously to keep us even in KoF, and he's got me pretty beat in Halo. Sure enough, our team won... (And I don't think Larsen was too happy about it... heheh.)

Let's see, summary mode, check!

I'm sure most everyone read about Phlinx and I on his journal. I really can't add anything more to it really. I just didn't feel that I could keep my feelings towards him, and I didn't want to just play like I was going out with him.

But he's still a very damn good friend of mine. I'm just not ready to take that kind of step yet.

Let me think if I have anything else... oh yes!

I'm sure I'll get a resounding told-you-so... or the likes, but I've decided agianst running L5R. So, I'll pass the books back to Eric. As for anyone else DMing, that's cool and up to them. *laughs* I just don't have the creative resources to put into an L5R campaign. The more I read into the setting, the more I just felt it wasn't the type of RPG I want to run. Not without LOTS of setting editing. The setting as is, just didn't appeal to me in a role playing form. (It's fine for the card game, and creates lots of interesting mechanics, but for role playing, I find it trite and overbearing.)

With that said, I plan to focus now on running my Final Fantasy RPG. I have solid plans for it, a really good story laid out, and it is much more up my alley.

Originally, I thought to run both games... but as I'm working on a D&D campaign for the summer day camp program, my Final Fantasy RPG, I'm playing in Rory's campaign (And writing a story about it), and will most likely begin drawing up plans for a World of Darkness game in the fall... I just really don't have the creative juices to put into a game I wasn't feeling too good about in the first place.

While on the role playing tangent, I probally will begin the Final Fantasy RPG AFTER A-Kon. (As I still need about a week to prepare, and personally, I think next week will be kinda hectic for us all.)

I think I have roughly six people interested in playing. Maybe seven. *laughs*

Anyways, I gotta go get ready for work! Talk to you all later!

Ciao, folks!
Comments (4) | Permalink

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

   May the force be with you!
I'm off to go see Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith! Hehehehe! I can't wait!

So much to talk about... but that will come later! Heh! May the force be with you all!

Comments (4) | Permalink

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

So much to say....
Hmmm, where to start? How about something pointless.
----

Gaming wise, I've been playing Guild Wars. Got the Skylar Knights running pretty darn well. We're probally gonna secure a Guild Hall before week's end. Then we start the trials of PVP. Tolarin's getting up into the higher levels too.

PSO Blue Burst's beta opens tommorow. I can't wait for that. Gonna make my PSO Tolarin... He was such a bad ass in PSO! *laughs* I'll try to get screenshots of him... gotta love blue hair!

----

In role playing... I come with two to three points. First of all, L5R. The main reason the L5R has been delayed is becuase I just don't feel confidence in the campaign. I like to feel the campaign will be good before I run it. I hope to create good games for people to play, and I have got to say that I just don't feel all excitied about L5R. I will try and run it, since it seems to be the only game people wanna play... but I just have to say that I'm a bit cautious about the quality of the game. We'll see. The main idea will still revolve around the Crane Lands recovering from a powerful storm that struck it's coastline. Your characters were asked to help fasciliate the people in a time of need... others however, have plans to try and exploit them... where you stand will be the game.

I will also soon be running the Final Fantasy RPG (Known in RPG circles as the Returners FFRPG system.) in my own original Final Fantasy-like campaign. Honestly, this is the game that I WANT to run. I've kinda had a lust for a high fantasy/sci-fi game for a while now. It's kind of a mix of FFVI and FFXI... Basically, the world of Nuterra is nothing but three great islands, ruled by the Nuterran Royal Family. Hume (Humans) are the predominantly the only race, yet, much like our own world... there are stories of other races, other lands.... most believed to be fairy tales....

There are of course, the Moogles. Moogles for some reason, seem to know many of the secrets of the world. You'll never see MANY moogles... but they seem to pop up where you'd least expect it... and no one's entirely sure where they come from.. save for the Moogles themselves.

The three islands are Nuterra, the Royal Island itself... Erath, a farming/fishing island... and Rylus, an island that attracted a good deal of attention due to the old ruins that were found in it's forests... ruins that the Nuterrans can't account for.

The story begins in Rylus. The characters are there for any number of reasons... perhaps to tame the wild island, perhaps to explore the ruins... However, whatever they are... they weren't ready for the "Black Fleet"

They are called such, becuase no one is exactly sure what this so called "Black Fleet" is.... all that is known is that one day, the seemingly endless blue skies of Nuterra tore open, a darkness flooding in from the rip... and from it, a great flying fortress descending upon the island. The city was siezed, by soldiers in black armor... No help from Nuterra has come yet... indeed, no one is quite sure what to make of this all...And so the game begins, as a resitance group is being formed to break the "Black Fleet" that has come to occupy the city.

Sort of an FFVI style begining towards a truly epic story... the fate of Nuterra in the balance.

I'm excited in the game. I know Rory will play it, and I'm trying to get Michael and maybe others in... I love this game idea.

Speaking of Rory, he wants me to bug you two (Levi and Mint) about his D&D game. Apparently it's this Saturday. I'll play with him. It's up to you if you want to join in or not. *laughs*

----

Moving on, we go to Tolarin's emotional world. *laughs* It's been so rocky lately, you know? Don't get me wrong, I'm not depressed. Just becuase I'm not cheery and making the Tolarin laugh doesn't mean I'm depressed, I've just kinda had emotional turbulance, you know?

I think alot of it's trying to find a sort of place emotionally for me. In some fashions, I thing I kind of have had to sort of re-mature you know? I've only had one meaningful relationship... hell, any other "girlfriend" I might have had was nothing more then playing around. It wasn't until Katie that I really had a real relationship of any sort.

I think the best way of stating this is, I don't know how to express my emotions lately. When I was with Katie, she was the whole world to me. I dedicated all my feelings to her. Four years later, I think alot of it is trying to relearn that social aspect agian. And so, the logical side and the emotional side kind of argue back and forth on what to do about situations.

And in fashions I never even fathomed until now in many ways. The relations between many of the people I've met lately and the relations I've formed are unlike anything I've ever dealt with.

Traditionally, the way I viewed things was to have a relationship with a person that you meet and develop with... you know, almost like courting a person and all that.

When I dated... and with that, I can really only use Katie as an example... There was much confusion, lots of "I like yous", a school dance, and then a kiss at a party, nearly a month or two later. Which signaled us becoming a real couple.

I was never a touchy-feely person before her... and even then, I'm still not entirely. You all know sometimes it can make me a little awkward. It's not that I don't appreciate/like/dislike/or anything of that sort. It's just that I'm not sure of how to react, the sort of subtle meanings in it. The truth of the matter is, I have one strong relationship to go on... and without any other experience, I'm kinda free floating, trying my best to understand things.

It doesn't help that many of the people I talk to think I should stop trying to be the "nice guy". (And in one fashion, I think I've slipped up in my "noble" nice guy routine... twice... once trying to win back Katie, and one other time. )

I try to play it off, but you all should know the truth at this point. I'm a pretty darn emotional guy. I'm just not particularly good at expressing those emotions. (Or, at other points... controlling them.)

I don't know exactly where I'm going with this... *laughs and scratches his head* It's getting kind of late, maybe I'll continue this train of thought at a later date.

----

Speaking of which... I'm gonna try going to bed at a better hour. I need to get ready for those Summer Day camps, not to mention I want to start hiking and excersing in the morning... and see if I can try and not look so dead tired all the time.

I think that's it for me tonight. Maybe some more stuff tommorow.

Until then!

Ciao,folks!

Comments (3) | Permalink

Monday, May 2, 2005

No Need for Subjects!
Ahhhh... an amusing subject for a serious topic. Doesn't that make sense?

Typically, posts in my journals are done in a sort of humorous lecturing style. In many ways, the way I post in my journal is very similar to both the way I speak and the way I post on message boards.

First, and foremost, I am very true to myself. You will NEVER see me post anything anonymously. This has gone so far to the point that I even usually try to make sure that along with the name Tolarin Skylar, I try to make sure people know my real name: James Pickens. If you look to the right, you'll see some pretty accurate real life information of mine. Where I live, how old I am, and my real name. I want people to be sure of who I am. This is one part ego, one part accuracy for you folks. You could never really mistake another Tolarin for me... *laughs*

The other thing you will notice in my journal is that I post very similar to how I post in a message board. I usually talk about how things went, and keep most of my private life out of this, much like one would do on a message board for the most part. Why?

Becuase in many ways, this is like the Message Board of James Pickens. Often you will hear me refer to these journals as the Public Message Boards of certain people. And for the most part, they are absoloutly public. Almost everyone on here posted on the Ushicon Message Board the URL to their journals. And for those of us who didn't (Read: Myself), we are linked or activily refered to in each others journals.

Thus, when I hear the idea that "I post what I feel becuase it's my journal." I can't help but laugh. This is not some private diary of yours. This is a spot on the wide open internet where pretty much anyone can read it if they so choose.

So, I see across the board of my friends through their journals various posts discussing the events that occured nights ago, discussing individual people's "faults", and so on. Things that should best be left discussed between us, not posted online so anyone and everyone can read, see, and decide who's side they want to take.

So, as I watch this all sort of burn around me, I've decided that it's time I live up to my idea of being very true to myself.

It's often thought that I leave people out or don't pay enough attention to them, or whatnot... and there is some truth to it. In all honesty, I am closer to Levi, Mint, and Mark. And in many ways, it's not hard to see why either. If you are reading my journal, you are undoubtlbly reading their journals... and if that's the case, you all should know that I had a crush on both Mint and Mark. And there has been alot that has happened between us. Of course, you can't leave Levi out of that for the obvious reasons as well.

I do value my friends greatly, and I deeply care and love them. A lot happens between the three of us. I don't mean in the realm of arguements or debates, drama, or whatnot... we do hang out a great deal, and I connect with them in ways that I don't connect with others.

Mint is a very cute young woman, who I find a pleasure to talk to, my drinking buddy, and the other half of Team Sugoi. (On that note, two things to note on why folks can't join Team Sugoi. One: Originally, it's becuase I had a crush on her. This isn't really news, folks. Two: You can't really have any more then two people on a team in Naruto 3. It's also mainly a constant joke. Originally, becuase we sucked... and then becuase of our tendency to say Sugoi over and over agian.)

In Levi's case, Levi was someone I got along with since our first Park and Pizza encounter. There were many times during Ushicon that it was Mint, Levi, and myself wandering around. There are many ways that Levi and I can relate. You know? He's pretty fun and pretty understanding of things. He can be a bit of an ass, but of all people, who am I to complain about that? Further more, his assness is something I can laugh at...

Mark of course, is among many things... one of my best friends, someone who I can talk with for a good long time, and a damn good guy as well. Further more, as most people know, he's also the first guy I've ever felt I could care for in a relationship sort of sense. My crushes and what not for people are very serious to me.

The one night, where I kind of broke down was becuase the conflict between my feelings for these three people really got to me. I never want to hurt those that I care for. Levi is a good friend of mine, who I could hurt becuase I liked Mint. Mint was of course a good friend of mine, who I didn't want to hurt or trouble (But at the same time, in not being true to myself, I felt that I was being awkward towards her... and thus, troubling her as it was.) And Mark I didn't want to feel as a sort of "fall back" or "while I'm lonely" sort of relationship. I will NEVER do that. I don't believe in it.

So, yes, I've had my troubles lately when it came to them. But it also made our ties stronger. The four of us are damn good friends becuase we work out our problems, and try our best to move on.

That's not to say we don't have our occasional problems. We all do.

Everyone os us will have our ups and downs. This is how life is. Free will gives us the awesome ability to try and improve our lives. At the same time, almost always, somewhere down the line... improving your life will impede someone elses. We cannot all be "truly happy" at once. Instead, we must find our happiness as it comes to us.

In being friends with these three, I find much happiness. But it's not limited to these three. I find happiness with all of you. However, the closeness I feel towards the aforementioned three is very strong, and for damn good reasons, I would think. Much like I believe the closeness between certain people are.

I do not believe in factions or sides. I will admit, however, that I do favor Mark, Levi, and/or Mint in cases, but this is becuase I act upon how I feel. I believe all of us do.

This is something that can't be avoided. That's not to say that I don't hold value in everyone else as friends. There are times I enjoy hanging out with many of you. Newbeh and Eric both share much in common with me. Zappa and Tala are people that I do enjoy to talk to, if I don't talk all the time... it's becuase I'm very lazy online... even Mark has to deal with my online laziness...

At the same time, I will be very true to myself. I have my faults, but I deal with them my way. I'm not saying that this is a case of my way or the highway, I don't believe in that... but I do believe in working out my problems in my fashion. Mint and I were having trouble on Friday night becuase I was being a kind of stubborn ass, but we cleared that up. And there are many times when I try to ensure that you are a happy person Alora.

I just don't believe in posting it in my journal. I believe in taking action, and solving my problems on my own. The problem I see in posting things like this online, is invariably, it makes people who aren't involved basically have to choose who they are going to support in these cases.

This of course, is true even for this post. This post essentially is to try and make people understand how I see things. This wouldn't be much different from "rallying people to my side". Of course, I will say "Please, don't take my side" or "this matter is between us." But the moment I say a word on here, I am neither being neutral nor making this a private matter.

So, instead, I am trying to allow you the chance to get at least a glimpse of how I think about everything. Perhaps you (And by you I mean everyone in general... not just Alora or Newbeh or something like that) will have a better understanding of what I think and how I act. Perhaps not.

The honest truth is, I will be myself. Sometimes it'll be happy go lucky. Other times it'll be a rude and arrogant ass. This is my way of the ninja, much like each of us have our own ways. We either try to accept each others methods, or we part ways. This is the reality of life.

With that said, I always hope we try and look at the best of people. I try to do so with everyone. If I didn't, I wouldn't try to be anyone's friend... now would I? I try to think the best of myself, becuase if I didn't like myself, how could I truly like anyone else? And I try to look for the best in life, becuase if I didn't, how would I ever find it?

That's my long spiel for today. Expect something crazy about Guild Wars or L5R tommorow!

Ja ne!

Comments (2) | Permalink

Monday, April 25, 2005

Wow... for you RPG fanatics... look at this...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=2547&item=5189421827&rd=1&ssPageName=WDVW

Gosh, if I had money... That's so far the cheapest I've ever seen that damn book. Only 3,000 copies of the DUNE RPG exist.

RPG lusting aside...
-----

Last two nights have been good! Hung out with Anubis, Phlinx, and Mint... played Naruto... Team Sugoi has become truly formidable.... went adventuring in a network of sewers... I kid you not! And in general, just had a really good time.

About to sit down and start watching Initial D. And uh... working on creating my darn sci fi series agian. *laughs*

Until then, talk to you all later!


Comments (7) | Permalink

Saturday, April 23, 2005

It's time to go!
First of all, if any of you love Japanese live action.. definetly check out Kamen Rider Faiz: Lost Paradise. It was pretty sweet. As cheesy as Kamen Rider Faiz was, but with slightly cooler special effects! *laughs* And the guy they got to play Psyga Rider was pretty cool... as usual, always speaking in English... not very good acting... but it was kinda cool none the less. *laughs*

And it leave a bit open for a new Kamen Rider Faiz... which would be cool as well. In case I didn't make it clear enough that I like Faiz.

-----

So, how about something a bit more relative to everyone, eh? We went to Six Flags for Subaru's birthday. It was pretty cool. The rides were cool and whatnot. We lost Subaru and Alora, on accident really. Apparently, they went into a shop for ten minutes to look for something. Phlinx and I looked for them, didn't find them, went to the ride they were at, rode it, then spent another ten minutes searching the street for them. So, let's assume they were in the shop for thirty minutes, which according to their account, they weren't... we should have theoretically ran into them. But, we didn't. This gave up the impression that they went off on their own. And so we did.

Apparently, they didn't. Instead they waited around for an hour and a half for us before heading out. Everyone, I want you to roll a common sense check, DC: 5. (For those of you Dungeons and Dragons impaired, this means that you roll a D20 and add a modifer, trying to get at the very least a 5.) If you get above 5, I want to congratulate you for understanding that if we can't find each other after thirty minutes, the best thing to do is probally shrug, and move along. It's not like we're gonna leave without each other, nor is it like we really think we're trying to ditch each other. We just got seperated. It happens. I don't really care to hear if YOU imagine it's rude. What you like to think it is, is your buisness, and honestly, that problem falls into your court, not mine.

----

While I'm on the subject of slights and insults, I also want to make this clear to EVERYONE. I'm tired of jokes about my sexual experience/behavior or lack therof. First of all, it's my buisness and I believe it to be personal. Second of all, while I can tolerate some joking of it, I do not enjoy constantly having to deal with it. Third of all, I am of the personal opinion that love is more important then sex. This is a very important view of mine. One of my core views... and if it's constantly under fire, it doesn't take too long for even my ego and my pride to start to crumble. I'm not saying you can never make a sexual joke towards me. I'm an understanding person. But if you continue to bring it up, it does bother me.
----

But, with that out of the way... I did enjoy myself... we headed back to Mark's place. I was exhausted and sun burned to all hell.

Went to Mint and Levi's place and did our Narutarding! Team Sugoi is getting better and better! Heh, we rock! Mark and Levi play well, but with Minty's speed with Haku, and the raw power of Zabuza... heh... all will eventually fall! We'll be awesome... if not totally sugoi!

So, with a few exceptions, things were pretty cool yesterday. I like focusing on the good over the bad. Sub, I hope your birhtday went off really well. Mark, I had fun, thanks! I don't think we thank you enough for all the stuff you do! So let me make it really clear... thanks for everything man! You're one of my best friends!

Mint and Levi - I had fun over with you all as well! Team Sugoi continues to rise! Thus is the power of the Waterfall!

And yeah, everyone, have fun!
Comments (6) | Permalink