Monday, December 19, 2005

   Smile!
Quote of the day:

Since we don't know why we were given lives, the next best possible choice is to live it in bliss.

Live everyday to its fullest. Of course, that's obvious. For those that think of the many things that bring them down: What's it gonna help? Nothing. Stop worrying, moping, or crying, and move on. Another one of my favorite quotes is, and I say this all the time because it is true:
Don't frown because it's over smile because it happened.
Leave the "bad things" in life to themselves. There are so many people out there that care for and would rather see you and make you happy.

Word of the day (sorry guys, no language thingy today, these will help make you smart though!!^.^) :

mogigraphia (moj-i-GRAF-ee-uh) noun

Writer's cramp.

[From Greek mogis (with difficulty) + graph (writing).]

Tennis players have their elbows, athletes have their feet, so what do writers get? They get their cramps. Mogigraphia is a fancy name for a writer's cramp. Advanced writers go for a block. For the ultimate, we recommend carpal tunnel syndrome. A synonym of mogigraphia is graphospasm.


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Friday, December 16, 2005

   Minds are like parachutes, they only function when they are open.

~ Thomas Robert Dewar ~

That's what I love about open minded people. They are willing to accept or try almost anything, and that leaves another door open to greater opportunities, even greater people. We can make so many new and different friends that way, ne? What things have you done that you would never think you'd do? When you tried it, How did you feel, and would you ever do it again?

Phrase for the day (japanese), taken from the song, Haruka Kanata (Far off Distance):

kokoro wo sotto, hiraite gyutto hiki yosetara
todokuyo kitto tsutau motto sa

This means:
When you open your heart a little, and pull someone close to you,
your feeling will surely reach them deeper
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Wednesday, December 14, 2005

   Hey guys.
Well, as you know, I have been having trouble with adding posts to my journal. I've decided that for some time, I will post only a quote of the day, and maybe a word of the day too. I get these through a special email. If you wish to get these emails too, let me know.
Quote of the Day:
Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment.

~ Rita Mae Brown ~

I don't have a word of the day, but maybe something of a different language will be of some help in expanding your minds.

"¿Quiere usted un beso?" means "Do you want a kiss?

Enjoy!

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Thursday, December 1, 2005

.-.
11- 23-05
Apparently, I’m not very good at Ship, Captain, Crew…
Haha, well not haha. Someone just broke some glass in the middle of the restaurant.
Spending the afternoon with Ms. Denise and her family proves to be somewhat fun yet irritating. I think the reason why they take so many pictures is because Ms. Denise isn’t here all the time. She lives in California. I usually just suck it up and put that SSDD smile for half a second.. But really, the amount of times they do it, and the places they choose, makes them look like freaking tourists. I love Ms. Denise to death. She’s the coolest. But the rest of her family…ugh…I don’t know. Other than that…
I finally got ot see my baby today! I missed him so much. God I love Raymond so much. I just can’t belive I found someone like him. He treats me so well, and love me so much. He makes me feel like the happiest girl in the world. I love being in his arms, being held by him, feeling his kisses, hugs and warmth. It’s truly like no other feeling in the world…
And then
Ian called
Yes, I did ask him to call back. I wanted to hear what he had to say in the letter. Oi…
Back to goodness: 25 days, 4 months, 1 year until my freedom!!!
Friendships last forever, and I’m not going anywhere yet.

I love Raymond so much, I never want to lose him.

11-24-05
D *draws a row of picket fences*

In just a few moments, I get to see Ray again.
I miss him a lot over the break. Even though we’re going to Amy’s house ( I refuse to call her Aunt Amy) At her house, it’s even hard to just hold hands and stuff. The good thing about it is at least he’s not just moping around, or being inactive, anti-social and stuff. He played poker with my dad, Uncle Alex and grandpa!
“keep ‘em coming baby, don’t listen to your Tia” is what my mom said when I was dealing some cards out for them. Amy was kinda telling me to slow down.
It’s not like I listen to Amy in the first place anyway…Hehe
Uncle Alex was showing me how to work his digital cable thing. There was a thing for a program called “Pornotopia”. At first, I thought it said “Porkotopia”, like for pigs or a food show, something like that. Hahaha. Pornotopia….

Day after Thanksgiving
It’s time for sleep. I posted two long posts on ZenHex. Mom thinks that they are chatrooms. She seems to be getting more and more paranoid over the internet. ZenHex is anything BUT a chatroom. I only go there to roleplay and stuff. I’m only known as a Wolf on that site. NOTHING about my character has anything to do with my real life ((OCC))
The reason why I’m writing in red (I wrote this in an actual journal before I put it to the computer) is that I’m sleeping in my sister’s room tonight. I think she’s scared or something. There’s a lightning/ thunder storm outside and it’s so Beautiful.

“If you spend all your time thinking about dying, life isn’t going to be too much fun, huh?”

Roseanne is great, it’s the episode about babies and death. It’s ironic that Darlene didn’t say much about it
I keep thinking about…
Babies
Little boy babies…
My babies….
I think about who they will look like
When I do have children, when that time comes, I don’t care what gender it would be, as long as it’s there. In wishful thinking, I want a baby boy. After that, a baby girl. No too far apart in age, maybe a year of so…
I hope the house thing will work out after High School. I still have to figure out where I’m going to school after HS. I wonder what Walter’s gonna do. I love Walter so much, my other big brother. I know he’ll take care of me if we do move in together. I wonder about Ray and what he’ll do…
Speaking of Gay (giggle)- I wonder about the amount of people who stopped watching Roseanne whey they find out that Leon is gay.
IT’S NOT A FUCKING PHASE GOD DAMN IT FUCKING ALL!!!
That’s what I say about me…a phase can’t last 5 years

December 1 2005
Don’t listen to creepy music at nigh. Alex burned me a creepy music CD, and I put it in around midnight. The scariest song on that EVER, is the theme song to X-Files. God I hate that song. It came on and the chills went right down my spine as I got up to change the track.
I’m still hearing noises around the place. A few seconds ago I heard a buzzing type noise over my right shoulder. It was like a buzzing/ weak growling noise. At the moment, that’s where Sha’atan was positioned, but I know it wasn’t him…
James proposed to his girlfriend today. This morning. Oh man, it was so sweet, awesome, cool, perfect. It was right in front of the whole damn group! The “anime” group. Ahh…it was great. He didn’t have a ring, but they seem so close and happy when they’re wish eachother. Ray and I have been going out longer than they have I think. For us, it would be four months on the 4th of Dec. I’m getting him a little bear tomorrow as a congrats gift for winning the Hockey Tournament. On the fourth, maybe the fifth, I’m getting him a bigger bear that has hearts on his feet.
One of these days, I want to go to build a bear workshop and make him one with hockey gear, and one with Skate gear. ^.^ That’d be cool. I need money though. I really don’t care if he gets me anything, as long as I’m with him, I’m fine.
I love him so much….


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Thursday, November 10, 2005

Rape me....(nirvana)
Ok I'm in Monty's room again.
Well, The only thing I guess I can remember right now is my dream, seeing that the guy is in the room with me right now.

I had another rape dream. Shit. This time it was that guy named Marshall. In the band hall. This is the second dream i've had like that. I don't feel comfortable around him anymore...I don't know why. But, um, Ray knows, and stuff. So does Walter, so I think I'll be ok if anything happens. I doubt it will though.
I love all of you guys.
Hey, Tatsume, Cracker and I made a promise to each other that when we all turn 65 or so that we'd kill eachother. Yeah...it's all good. I dont' want to die old. My next post will be about that.
Talk to you all later. Ja!
o_0
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Friday, November 4, 2005

   Myotaku- banned
Hey guys. Sorry I haven't posted in so long.
I'm accessing this site through school. I'm banned fomr coming here at home. Mom thinks that online predators will get me through my inner thoughts. I won't be posted here much anymore. Seth has offered to post here for me, with the journal entries that I write down. So, I will be posted, just not as often. I'm going to miss you guys, and i will be trying to catch up with you while i'm in Mr. Montgomery's class.
Love, peace and Novacaine for the pain!~
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Sunday, October 9, 2005

   Oh man.
hehehe, mom sat at the stop sign, thinking it was a red light. That's how tired we all are. Dad is heavily buzzed, after going out to play poker with few buds.
I went to Springtime Skate Park with Raymond, mostly I watched him go all out. His friend Robert was supposed to come with us, but he got grounded. Such a shame, I was looking foward to actually meeting him. Seems like a cool guy. So we drove over there and I watched Ray. I like watching him skate. His hair was flowing everywhere. Awww it was awesome. I was faintly intimidated by the other guys there. I usually don't get that way though...I was the only girl there at least the only one with a skateboard. There was one dude that kept looking in my direction, but I ignored him. Then I gave Raymond a nice kiss to show him that i was taken. Yeah, that's right I LOVE THIS DUDE!!! *points to Ray* Damn straight. He gave up and went to hit on two girls that had cigarettes. Ew.
So I did skate a little bit, erm, kinda. I skated TO Raymond (who was on the quarter pipe) to tell him that mom was on the way.
She was apparently mad at me, and said that Ray had to go straight home, but changed her mind when she found out that Sami had another ride to Homecoming. I didn't understand. She said that she was upset, and I had planned this at the last minute, but I informed her last night, and for the past few days that Ray wanted to take me skating. She just seems...to...take everything out on me. I think she was frustrated about Sami having to change outfits or something. But Ray was able to come to my house after all. Mom didn't mention any of it.

I had a dream last night, Ray and I were both in it and I don't think i have to mention what was going on. But He also told me of a dream he was having. In his dream, we were doing almost the exact same thing, but...Yugi walked into the room, right in the middle of it....
I don't know why this bugs me. She has always acted...cute....around him and stuff. She did that same thing with one of my past boyfriends last year. Tony. It bugged me back then too. Ray said that he was trippin out when Yugi walked in too though. It's just...wierd..I don't know. I told him this and he told me not to worry, that he loves me and I love him too, with all of my heart. This thing is always going to be in the back on my mind though...but, way back. I'm not going to think about anymore, I'm going to try. Along with that, are many things that my parents said about the future and what it may have in store for us. *chuckle* I know they meant it for fun...but sometimes I just can't get some of these things out of my head. I know it made Ray tense, and me too. It's just like, Wow, guys I can't believe you just said that....
Each time he hugged me, I held him closer and tighter than ever. I made it last longer; his embraces meant more to me today than ever before. I appreciated them so much more than the past.
I love him so much.
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Monday, September 26, 2005

   Man it's been such a long time since i've posted, sorry for any of the few that try to keep up with me.
That dilemma from the last post has been solved, I think mine and Yugi's guardians will wind up being hooked up.
I love Darude.
bloomies9: what time doe sur mom go to bed?
PurpleThunder07: Hahahaha. That's a random question. She goes to sleep around 11 30
bloomies9: lol, sorry it is kinda random
bloomies9: so 1030 co time?
PurpleThunder07: she's here now if you wanna call. But i'm on the home phone. Do you want me to hang up so you can call?
bloomies9: no, ill call her later tonight just tell her to be expectin my call
PurpleThunder07: okie dokey
bloomies9: thank u!
bloomies9: UR AWSOME
PurpleThunder07: I know *pops collar*
bloomies9: lol

haha if you think about this, it's kind of a funny/ awkward conversation about my mom. This is my brother's girlfriend that I'm talking to. She's cool.

Haha, at the end of practice, I hopped over the rail to get to teh lower level of the outside patio, and Raymond wanted a kiss before i left. So i was trying to reach up and he was leaning over the rail. Well, We still couldnt' reach, so, being the short little midget that I am, I decided to jump up to reach his lips. Haha Guess what, our noses collided!! OH MAN, it was awesome...but not really.
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Thursday, September 15, 2005

short rant
This isn't a very long post, Just a bit of a rant


Every single time i say I'm going to give up on Yugi and Seth, I always forget that I say it. I always wind up helping one or the other. Most of the time I will admit it is Yugi. Seth doesn't really NEED help, she just needs to vent once in a while.
Yugi is just so hardheaded and won't listen to me. I've told her millions of times to do something for the good of herself and others...but she just won't.
It' pissing me off so much that I just don't want to listen to her anymore. I don't want to listen anymore...but I have to, she depends on me a lot. I just wish she would get it through her thick skull that she's got so much other stuff going on for her, she either just can't see it, or chooses not to. I think she just chooses not to but it's putting her through hell and I'm just fucking sick and tired of it. I just want it all to end. She needs to figure out what she needs to do to stay happy. I don't see why i've put up with it for so long. This is the reason why I moved here to Texas. I wanted to get away from the negativ and stuff. Damn. I thought all these friends would help me...Well it's not all the friends...mostly....just...her...but still...

Other stuff that bugs me:

(GIVE IT UP) DIRTY HOT SEX




9/7/2005 8:20:00 PM


HEY RAYMOND WHAT'S UP?!? I HAVEN'T TALKED TO YOU IN FUR EVER!! I HEARD YOU GOT A GIRLFRIEND NOW!! BUT I THINK YOU'RE REALLY CUTE AND YOU SHOULD START TALKING TO ME AFTER YA'LL BREAK UP... CUZ YEAH... I LIKE YOU!! YEAH YOU SHOULD CALL ME SOMETIME IF YOU STILL HAVE MY NUMBER!! OKAY?!? BI RAYMOND!!
<3 MELISSA
I just never wanted to say it. I don't know why i'm bugged by this, or if I even should be bugged....


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Sunday, September 4, 2005

I sent a message to my dad that had some attachments from my brother (who lives in Colorado). It contained pictures of his kitten named Indy. I told my brother about GSA, and without thinking sent that same message to my dad. I fowarded it to him because he wanted to see the pictures too. It wasn't until after i pushed "send" that i realized what was in the message. So i sent this little thingy to him right after. I hope he kinda reads it, so that i can finally tell him. But I also hope that he doesn't, i'm afraid of his reaction. Well, here it is:

Okay...
I guess i have a lot of explaining to do....
Erm...Please don't be mad, but yes, I am in the GSA club at school. Thursdays, at 4. It's the club I've been going to aside from Art club (art club is only held on mondays). Please don't be mad, let me explain myself. These friends that I made in this club are the same friends that welcomed me into their arms when I was having trouble in those first couple months of school last year.
I knew that you might have trouble with it, I wasn't sure if you would still go by what you were taught in School. I remember you telling me that you didn't have a problem with "these kind of people" on New Year's. I hope you still feel the same way. I just wanted you to know that these are my friends, and if you plan on taking away the privilage of this club, then I would be torn apart. They mean a lot to me.
I hope you understand. And I'm sorry if there is any confusion or for any negative effect this might put on are relationship. I figure I should open up to you about this anyway. It's one of my last hopes to get closer to you. It's just club though, I just need your thoughts. If you want, you could come to a meeting and see what they are all about. I think it will help you understand better, parents are always welcome. If you want, write me back, or you can just come out and talk to me verbally about this....any conversation or discussion on this issue is welcome from you.
I love you daddy,
Mandi
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