Saturday, February 25, 2006

Going Through Changes and Decisions
Listening: Nothing- A SHOCKER!!
Feeling: Expressive/Hyper
Watching: Boys Don't Cry
Drinking: Coffee
Thinking: OH YEAH!! THIS IS THE GREATEST THING SINCE SKITTLES!!
Wishing: I dunno... O_o

Hi everybody!! How're you doing? I AM SOOO HYPER TODAY!!!!!! *squeeks*

.::16 F****ING COMMENTS!!::.

MY LORD!! THAT IS THE MOST I'VE EVER GOTTEN IN MY LIFE!! 16 COMMENTS!! *glomps everyone who commented* I LURVE YOU ALL!!!! Oh, and aodtr666?It's okay if you can't comment me. I understand, so it's no problem. ^^

.::Boys Don't Cry::.

I am watching Boys Don't Cry right now. It's SUCH a good movie!! I love it!! It's an Independant Film by Kimberly Peirce, and if you haven't seen it, I suggest you either rent or buy it. Not to mention, it's a true story.

.::Changes::.

Isn't this the plainest you have ever seen my site? All black with white and a lightesh purplesh type of font color. Needless to say, I LIKE IT! X3 You may have notices that there is NO
background music. Well, that's because I've grown addicted to AFI (also known as the GREATEST band to ever be alive). I put up their movie I got from YouTube, so go ahead and watch it. I wish Jade and Hunter could run through my classroom randomly. THAT WOULD KICK ASS!! It's confusing though... GRRR!! THAT CHICK KISSED DAVEY!! NOW SHE MUST DIE!! JADE WAS SUPPOSSED TO KISS DAVEY!! NOT HER!! UNDERLINE UNDERLINE UNDERLINE!!!!! *goes to edit video by putting Jade in her place*

.::Nazis and Communists?::.

Yesterday was a fucking mess at school!! In the morning I was hanging out with some of my friends, and all of a sudden, out of NOWHERE- EVERY FRUCKING STUDENT in the school was marching at the front like Nazis and Communists about to kill eachother!! WHAT THE FUCK?!! I don't care if I'm wrong about the Nazis and the Communists being enimies. I really don't care. -__-'' It just so happened, that a group of black kids were cussing out one of the teachers. One of our teachers, Mrs. Seifken, was laughing her ass off at it!! I'm surprised she didn't get fired!! O_O To make matters worse, at the end of school, just because of all that, EVERY CLASS had to line up, and they let us all go home ONE BY ONE. And just as I predicted, my class was the last one to go. THAT MOTHERFUCKING DISTRICT!! *screams*

.::My NEW Decision For myO::.

I have decided to stay on myOtaku. So, nobody can cry or weep or mourn for me, because I'm staying. ^^
*shifts eyes*
I LURVE YOU ALL!!
*hugs everybody*

.::Lyrics::.

"I Wanna Get A Mohawk (But Mom Won't Let Me Get One)" by AFI

I may be ten years old but I still know what's up.
I wear my Cramps shirt almost every single day.
I want to sag my pants.
I want to pogo dance,
but Mom won't let me so I might just run away.

I wanna ride my skate.
I wanna stay out late.
I wanna mohawk but mom won't let me get one.
I wanna go to shows.
Don't wanna pierce my nose.
I wanna get a mohawk but mom won't let me get one.

I may be in fourth grade,
but I know what's going on.
I listen to the Misfits almost every single day.
Don't want to take a nap,
I want a TV tat,
but Mom won't let me so I might just disobey.

I wanna ride my skate.
I wanna stay out late.
I wanna mohawk but mom won't let me get one.
I wanna go to shows.
Don't wanna pierce my nose.
I wanna get a mohawk but mom won't let me get one.



See you on the side.

S.M.

Comments (7) | Permalink

Friday, February 24, 2006

KAHAHAHAHAHAJHSADHEHBNSBDHAG!!!!!! and so on...
Listening: Matchbook Romance- Monsters
Feeling: Comical XD
Watching: The little people dance in my shoe O_o
Drinking: Water
Thinking: Shinobiwolf's gonna KEEL MEEEH
Wishing: I had a fort made out of pillows

Hi everybody! How're you doing? Good for your sake.

.::Depressing Moment All Gone::.

Whew! I'm not depressed anymore. *sighs in relief* I feel MUCH better than I was 2 days ago. ^^ After having my friends make me life like a maniac, reading Gorillaz fanfiction, eating chocolate, and looking at some yaoi pics of 2-D and Murdoc, I feel MUUUCH better. ^___^ O_O Oh, God... I just realized... Shinobiwolf's SO going to murder me because of the Gorillaz Yaoi thing in my DA gallery. O_O *runs away*

.::The Funniest Thing EVER::.

OMFG! The funniest thing happened at school yesterday!! John was looking at some of Pam's poems/songs she wrote, and we cracked up laughing! I know it's mean, but she even went so far as to write "Sad and Depressing Songs" at the very first page. LMFAO XDDDDD She got mad at us for laughing but I couldn't help it!! It was so goddamn funny!! The first song sounded like something Avril Lavigne would write because the beginning was "oh, oh, oh". lol I like Avril though; I think she has very good music, but she seems like a poser... -___-'' I'm so sorry Pam! Please forgive me!! Well, she did, but then she laughed about it too afterwards. XD

.::Oral Book Reports::.

Hmhmhm... ORAL... XD Anyway! Back to the topic!! *blushes heavily* I gave my Oral Book Report today in front of the class and I was SO EMBARRASSED!! I was blushign so hard!! It was on Helen Keller, and the time was supossed to be for 2 minutes, but I only lasted 15-20 seconds. O_o I'm not good in front of the class... I always curl up into a ball, blush a lot, and stutter. -__-''

.::TGIF::.

God, I sound like a bad friend. >< Shinobiwolf will kill me and take full satisfaction in doing so. I SAID SORRY!! XD lol But anyways, Happy Friday!! YES!! The weekend has arrived!! FREEDOM... for 2 more days. Great, I just killed the fun in it. SEE WHAT I MEAN ABOUT BEING A BAD FRIEND?!! TT_____TT (BIG sob)

.::Concert::.

My dad called me last night at around 10:00 PM. He said that the Social Distortion concert he went to in Aneheim was frickin AWESOME. He's so lucky!! He got to see Social D.!! LUCKY, I TELL YOU!! LUCKYYYYYYY!!

.::Thank You... *bows::.

Thank you everyone for telling me to get better yesterday. I will take all of your advice and move along. I really do listen to what my heart tells me to do, but sometimes my mind gets the best of me. I hate that... >< I would LOVE to thank Anguisel for her comment. Thank you... *bows* I read the song and felt SO much better. Thank you again... ^^

.::Poem/Song Thingy!! O_o::.

I made this up, and Luge (my friend) thought it was hysterical. So, here you go. X3

"We were sailing along
On a Bloody Bay
We could hear the voices screaming
That seemed to cry,
"You motherfucker! You're gonna die!"
As we screamed this moonlit cry on a Bloody Bay
On a Bloodyyy Baaayyy!"

That was so lame and random from 2nd period. XD lol

Sirius and Remus are the best. ^______^



See you on the other side.

S.M.

Comments (13) | Permalink

Thursday, February 23, 2006

I hope that love he gave you, was just enough to save you, you nearly broke my heart, just look at what you're tearing apart...
Listening: All American Rejects- Stab My Back
Feeling: Depressed
Watching: The fan on my ceiling turn
Drinking: Coffee
Thinking: Oh, God...
Wishing: I wasn't so sad

Hi everybody... How are you- ah, who cares...

.::Love...?::.

Remember when I said a lot of posts back how I am unable to love anymore because of what my friend did to me? Well, if you don't rememeber, here's a quick refresh: My so-called "friend" Vanessa went out with the guy I liked and she KNEW I liked him, yet she still went out with him. I felt crushed, broken, and betrayed. My emotions got fucked up so badly that it seemed as if Love got stabbed in the back and died.
But...
I'm starting to love again... and he is one of my friends. But he's so much older than me. He's at least 17 and I'm going to be 14 in a few months. No one could ever like someone like me, much less him... I know it's silly and dumb to love someone on the Internet and you never met him, but I can feel his emotions. It's as if... my heart is telling me to tell him, but my mind is telling me to shut my fucking mouth and stay quiet. What can I trust? I can't tell any of you OR him. Why? Simple.
I might be broken again if I tell anybody... especially him.

.::Thank Yous::.

Above my posts are a Thank You list to all of my friends on MyO who have helped me and have been the greatest friend to me I could ever ask for. If I have forgotten you, and you have helped me, please PM me to put you on the list. I don't want anyone to be left out. Look through the list to see if you're there.

.::Field Trip::.

The field trip I had yesterday was pretty cool. It made me feel better a bit. They even had an Orchestra play for about an hour, so we were back in time for 3rd Lunch, 5th and 6th period. I have no homework either. That's good to know.

.::New Theme::.

Like my new theme? I think it's better and calmer than my last. I have to be honest and say that I like it.

.::More Problems::.

*growls* Has anybody else been having comment problems? You know, you have over 11 comments then it goes down to 6? How you send PMs, and it says that there's a problem and it can't send it? How you're site won't open and let you post anything? Yeah, that's been happening a lot, huh? What the hell is wrong with MyO? Okay, if I don't get to your sites, comment, return PMs, or update, it's either all of the problems above. I apologize deeply if I do not get to you. Forgive me. *bows*

.::Sorry::.

I'm sorry for such a depressing post. I didn't mean to fuck your day up. I'm just... Sigh... I don't know... *laughs* I don't even know what the FUCK I'm feeling now...

.::Poem::.

"Emotions" by S.M.

When you are happy
I am happy
When you are sad
I am sad

When you laugh
I laugh
When you cry
I cry

When you are angry
I am angry
When you say nothing
I say nothing

When you step over the edge of a cliff
I do the same
When you jump off...
I do the same

Why?
Because
I love you



See you on the other side.

S.M.

Comments (11) | Permalink

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Don't give up, you're not thinking, Don't give up, just keep seeking...
Listening: Waking Ashland- I Am For You
Feeling: Kinda Depressed
Watching: My sanity dance out the door
Drinking: Coffee
Thinking: Someone really DOES care about him...
Wishing: He could open his eyes and see that

Hi everyone... How are you all doing? Better than me, I hope...

.::PMs::.

I won't tell you who I'm PMing, but I will tell you that he's on my Friends List. He seems really down. I wish I could just walk up to him and give him a hug. I just got a PM saying "no one cares about him" to which, I replied, "What if there's someone who does?" and I haven't gotten anything back yet. Please answer back...

.::Art Mueseum::.

We're going on a field trip today to the Riverside Art Mueseum. Maybe this can cheer me up a bit. Knowing my friend, Javier, he'll make anybody laugh. He is pretty funny. *smiles a bit*

.::Leaving Part II::.

It's official, and I've decided that I WILL leave MyO in a few more months. If the site keeps messing up a bit like it's doing now, I might leave earlier than I thought. Although, a part of me is still keeping me here longer than I planned to...

.::Lyrics::.

"I Am For You" by Waking Ashland

Something's very wrong here
Your heart has frozen over
and something's very strange here
You've lost all desire
The comfort we create to prove
We're something
But we're starving
Screaming in the night cause you want answers
From the one
And there is hope again

Don't give up, your not thinking
Don't give up, just keep seeking
And I, I am for you
And I, I will love you
And I, I am for you
And I, I will save you

Come and take my face or forever I
Will walk alone
And all the same mistakes
Cause I know you, I deny you
Days go by and choices still remain forever
Right and wrong is black and white
The illusions of this world
And there is hope again

I send myself to you
Yes always and always
I send my love to you

You found today, found today,
You found today, saw today



See you on the other side.

S.M.
Comments (7) | Permalink

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Listening: Bad Religion- Struck A Nerve
Feeling: Calm
Watching: Nothing
Drinking: Water
Thinking: (blank)
Wishing: I didn't drink that Monster Energy Drink

Hi everybody. How're you doing? Hopefully very well.

.::Monster Energy Drink::.

Ugh... It feels like someone blew a hole through my gut... I knew I shouldn't have drunk that Monster Drink yesterday... You know those Monster Energy Drinks they sell in Liquor Stores or Gas Stations? Yeah, I bought one of them, drank it, and now I feel all... BLEH! Not good. My stomach hurts. I guess I put too much sugar and sodium into my body... All I'm drinking now is water. No coffee, no ice teas, just water. ...Damn... A lesson has been learned... --;;

.::MyO::.

I've been reading in a lot of posts that MyO has been messing up lately. I can't blame you. It's been doing the same thing for me. I don't why, but I'm thinking about leaving MyO. Don't go nuts on me, it's just a thought.

.::WHAT!?::.

This is bullshit!! I visited EVERYONE who updated yesterday, and only 3 came to visit me! Thank you to those three, but the rest of this news is a load of crap!! UGGGH!! How come I'm nice to people, but I get ignored and bitched at in return? -__-

.::Poem::.

Instead of a Question, from now on, you will either recieve poems by ME, or lyrice from a song. This is a poem I wrote. ^__^

"Life Within Age"

When you are a child
you're mommy and daddy take care of you
Tell you that they love you
and help you up when you fall

When you are a teenager
you're mommy and daddy are in seperate places
That means you can still see them
but you hardly ever see the other

When you are a young adult
you're mommy and daddy hardly talk to you
You live by yourself now
in a different house

When you are an adult
you have a job and meet that special someone
you get married
and have a child of your own

But...
What happened to mommy and daddy?



See you on the other side.

S.M.

Comments (6) | Permalink

Monday, February 20, 2006

Listening: Bad Religion- Struck A Nerve
Feeling: Happy/Hyper ^^
Watching: Nothing
Drinking: Water
Thinking: What if GOD watches Anime?
Wishing: I was back in Santa Cruz... T__T

Hi everybody! How are you all doing? Hopefully, you're all doing splendid.

.::Back Home::.

Yes, the sad truth. I'm back in Hell, also known as Riverside. Damn... -__- Santa Cruz was awesome. I'm so glad I went back. It's still Punk Rock Central and nothing has changed as I have known it for 13 years. ^^ I call it Punk Rock Central because their are A LOT of Punks there. It's a kick-ass little town. God, I lurve it. X3

.::Cemetary Drive::.

Before we came back to Hell( XD ), Dad and I stopped at the cemetary back in Watsonville. We didn't stay long. Probably, like, 3 minutes or less. We just went to see his Mom. He said that he hasn't been there for a while. We left as soon as we saw it. Dad said cemetaries makes him depressed and he doesn't like to be depressed. XD Who DOESN'T get depressed in cemetaries?

.::Still Waiting...::.

I'm still waiting for my damn CDs mom said she was going to have her friend burn for me... -__- It's been a while now... She said she'll give him the list tomorrow. That's actually a good thing because I need to add two more. XD Haha! I know, I'm a greedy little idiot. XD Here's what I got:

Lords of Dogtown Soundtrack
The Matches: E Von Dal Killed the Locals
Bad Religion: Recipe For Hate (for Dad)
The Used: In Love and Death (Mine scratched reeeally BAD)
Linkin Park: Hybrid Theory (once again, scratched reeeally BAD)
From First To Last: Dear Diary, My Teen Angst Has A Body Count
The Offspring: Greatest Hits
Blink 182: Greatest Hits

A lot? Yes. Do I care? No. XD

.::New Guitar Chords::.

Dad taught me some new guitar tabs. I'm learning them pretty good. I'm glad for that. XD

.::Lyrics::.

"Struck A Nerve"

There's an old man on a city bus holding a candy cane
and it isn't even christmas
he sees a note in the obituary that his last friend has died
there's an infant clinging to his overweight mother in the cold
as they go to shop for cigarettes
as the spends her last dollar on a bottle of vodka for tonight

and I guess it struck a nerve
like I had to squint my eyes
you can never get out of the line of sight
like a barren winter day
or a patch of unburned green
like a tragic real dream
I guess it struck a nerve

every day I wander in negative disposition
as I'm bombarded by superlatives
realizing very well that I am not alone
introverted i look to tomorrow for salvation
but I'm thinking altruistcally
and a wave of overwhelming doubt turns me to stone

and I guess it struck a nerve
sent a murmur through my heart
we just haven't got time to track down names
like a magic speeding clock
or a cancer in our cells
a collision in the dark
I guess it struck a nerve

I try to close my eyes
but I cannot ignore the stimuli
if there's a purpose for us all
it remains a secret to me
don't ask me to justify my life

cause I guess it struck a nerve
like i had to squint my eyes
you can never get out of the line of sight
like a magic speeding clock
or a cancer in our cells
a collision in the dark
I guess it struck a nerve

.::Sites::.

I am SOOO sorry for not visiting anyone!! They had a time limit at my relative's house. You could only stay on the computer for like, 10 minutes, and then you're off. Can you believe that?!! I will DEFINATELY visit you guys tonight. I PROMISE.



See you on the other side.

S.M.

Comments (2) | Permalink

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Santa Cruz!!
Listening: Nothing
Feeling: Wierd/Tired
Watching: Nothing
Drinking: Nothing
Thinking: ...
Wishing: My headache will go away.

Hi everyobody. How are you doing? Good, hopefully.

.::Bleh...::.

I woke up with a reeeally bad headache. It still hurts... MY GOD, DOES IT HURT!! Sigh... I cannot swear because my cousin is watching me type this. Say hi Angela.

hiiiii!!!

Yep, that's her. She's 8 years old. I cannot swear!! NUUUU!! Oh well, on to today I guess.

.::More New CDs!!::.

I got ONE new CD yesterday in downtown Santa Cruz. IT HASN'T CHANGED A BIT!! YAYNESS!! I'm having a good time here. It was Bad Religion's Recipe For Hate. It's a reeeally good album. WHAT A WONDEROUS THING TO OWN!! YOU MUST HAVE IT!! BUY IT!! XD

.::Not much time::.

I don't have enough time to post A LOT today, so, I'll leave you with a picture, and I might visit your sites. So have a nice day. ^__^

Angela: see ya later!!!

Here's a randome picture of a cute little kitty! X3


See you on the other side.

S.M.
Comments (3) | Permalink

Friday, February 17, 2006

Listening: Nothing
Feeling: Calm
Watching: Neon Genisis Evangelion/Greys Anatomy
Drinking: Nothing
Thinking: o.O?
Wishing: I wanna see Broke Back Mountain!!

Hi everybody! How are you doing? Well, on to yesterday's events. XD

.::OMFG...::.

Do you know what happened?! OMG, John and Pam GOT HIGH. I am not even lying!! Dylan, our retarded "friend" put a capsule of CRACK in their Gatorade at lunch, they drank it, AND THEY GOT HIGH!! OMFG!! I can't believe that!! I hope they got home okay... DYLAN IS SO DEAD TOMORROW!! @_@ The funny thing is, no one CARED. -_-''

.::200+ GuestBook Signatures!!::.

THANK YOU EVERBODY FOR 200+ GB SIGS!! THANK YOUUUUU!! *glomps everyone*

.::Movies!::.

I saw Harry Potter 4!! *squeeks* It was sooo sad!! WAAAH!! T_T CEDRIC DIED!! NUUUUU!! DAMN YOU VOLDEMORT!! DAMN YOUUU!! *shakes fist into the sky* Sorry if I ruined it for you. -_- I saw, like, the first 12 minutes of Broke Back Mountain, and "Oh-Mother-Dearest" wouldn't let me see the rest!! >.< She said it had too much graphic sex or whatever. WHAT THE FUCK?!! I read M Rated fanfics and she won't let me see a rated R movie?!! That's bullshit!! I see rated R movies all the time!!

.::H.I.M Breaks Up?!!::.

Please say it isn't so!! Rumor has it that H.I.M, the coolest band I know right now, HAS BROKEN UP!! NUUUUUUU!! Please, God, let it just be a rumor!! TT___TT

.::Leaving for the Weekend::.

You may not hear from me for a while. I don't know exactly how long, but I'll be in Santa Cruz for the entire weekend. Maybe I'll post again on Monday. I'm not sure. Hopefully my Tio`s house has a computer so I can update at least once. I apologize deeply if I do not get to your sites. Please forgive me.

.::New Layout Soon::.

I'm still searching for a new layout. Thanks for your patience everyone. S.M. appreciates it a lot. ^^

.::Equivalent Exchange (hehe, just kidding)::.

In exchange for not seeing Broke Back Mountain, my mom will let me have her friend from work burn as many CDs that I want. HUZZAH!! AS MANY AS I WANT!! ISN'T THAT AWESOME?!! *takes out her Wish List and grins evilly* X3

.::Question::.

Are you doing anything for the weekend?

Here's a picture of a random hot punk! X3


See you on the other side.

S.M.

Comments (11) | Permalink

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Time: 10:40 PM
Listening: Bad Religion- Stranger Than Fiction
Feeling: Tired/Excited/Relieved
Watching: Nothing
Drinking: Water
Thinking: 3 day weekend... SO CLOSE!!
Wishing: Nothing

Hi everyone! Before I get yelled at by my mom, I felt like posting. ^^

.::History Project ALL DONE!!::.

YES!! I finished the ENTIRE History Journal thingy!! *squeeks* Now I have no HW all week for history now!! I speshul. X3

.::New Story In Mind::.

I haven't finished my current story Boys Don't Cry on FF.N yet(I still have like, 30 more chapters to go), but I have a new story in mind, and I want to know what you guys think of it! It's yaoi, so don't read unless you're interested-I WARNED YOU!

Pairing: NejiGaara
Anime: Naruto
Summary: [AU] Gaara, a punk who supports and wants to be in the Anarchy. Neji, a teen who wants to help him and be his friend. Gaara may hate him, but Neji... [yaoi, strong violence and language, sexual content, drugs, alchohol usage and more]

That's just the summary though... Is it good so far? I don't think it is... Just tell me what you think.

.::New Layout::.

I have a new layout coming up. Some of you may be confused about this next one, because it MAY be my last. *hint, hint*

.::American History X::.

OMFG... Did anybody see that movie? American History X? It's so sad!! I am not even kidding you!! If you haven't seen it, I suggest you rent or buy it, because it is a truly AMAZING movie you will naver forget. I swear to you.

.::Question::.

"Life is too short to be pissed off and depressed all the time." -American History X

Do you agree with this statement?

.::My Answer::.

Yes, I do. We should live our lives to the fullest and take better care of ourselves. Life is like glass. You drop it, it will break.



See you on the other side.

S.M.

Comments (5) | Permalink

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

We are, we are the shaken, we are the monsters, yeah, believe what you read
Time: 7:40 AM
Listening: Matchbook Romance- Monsters
Feeling: Tired
Watching: Nothing
Drinking: Coffee
Thinking: I don't wanna got to school anymore!!
Wishing: I didn't have to go to school

Hi everyone! How are you all doing?

.::School::.

Dammit... Now we all have to spend endless boring hours at school again. For some of our fellow older Otakus, it's the same, except they have work. ^^'' Hopefully we will all survive the ednless crappy boredom. HOPEFULLY. Notice my total confidence? XD

.::History Project Due::.

I am SO DEAD!! I haven't even started my Lewis and Clark journal yet!! We're learning Lewis and Clark at school, and we have to make a journal of them!! And it's due on FRIDAY!! FRIDAY PEOPLE!! I need to get some serious work done. NOW!! X(

.::Guitar Practice::.

I've been practicing both my bass and electric guitar sometime at night. I have to say, I've gotten a little better at it. Dad told me to take my guitar to Orange County whenever I visit him because he got me some guitar lessons there. Huzzah. XD At least I'll learn some new things.

.::Sorry!! *bows*::.

Sorry I couldn't get ANYBODY'S site last night. I was SO unbelievably busy, you couldn't even imagine. I posted yesterday, but nobody commented because it was a little late. >.< Can't say I'm not surprised. But don't worry, I'll get going to your sites today. Promise. *salutes*

.::Question::.

Which band/singer/artist do you like most? (Can be any genre of music)



See you on the other side.

S.M.

Comments (10) | Permalink