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Welcome friends! To my small slice of the world.
My names chaos, preferably uncle chaos. ^_- Im infatuated with art, Studio Ghibli, and icecream, particularly vanilla. Who isnt? :P feel free to take a look through my gallery, although you wont find anything too good, you might want to look on my website for some of my latest works. I hope you enjoy them If you decide to take a look! Id be delighted if you left a line in my guestbook telling me what you think of my art, and Id gladly return the favor. ^_^ Thanks for dropping by, have an excellent day m8s! It was nice meeting you!

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Friday, August 11, 2006

   How a guestbook post changed my life.

Hey everyone! I have something very dear to share with you all, a story that's been building up for over a year. It's the story of how a girl came into my life out of the blue and flipped everything I knew upside down.

It use to seem like my life was just one big BLAH and everything I did didn't really have a purpose, I'd paint these horribly nasty drawings and everything was just dark, dark dark, I felt like I had no direction. I was like a compass persay, but the compass was broken and crushed all over the ground, it wasn't aligned with any kind of magnetic field, and it never pointed the way it was suppose to.

Then oneday, A simple comment on my Myotaku fanart, and a guestbook signature came into my life out of the blue, something I never, never expected to happen was in the works. ZANG ZABAM!!! She came out of nowhere. This girl, and I started communicating Via PMS on MYO. THE GIRL WAS none other than "SILENCE THE DAWN!

I'm so grateful to have her. We talked and talked, and for some reason she began to trust me, something she normally wouldn't have done. She trusted me enough that she gave me her AIM screen name and we began to talk more often. Then emails, and we began to get closer as friends, and that's all I thought it was then..just a nice friendship with some Otaku girl thousands of miles away I'd never in a million years meet.

THINK AGAIN. We began communicating more and more, using email. We began to bond, and she flipped some kind of switch on the inside of me I never thought would get turned on, but it did. She seemed to pick up the broken pieces of the compass, shattered and bent, and point them due north. In my life I couldn't have asked for a better person to come along, she seemed to be just what I needed. My compass finally had a direction to go.

I never thought I'd be here typing all this, It's hard to believe. She was in the same kind of situation, depression seemed to run amuck and issues I'd never thought of before strickened her...She never showed any symptoms of it until you got up under her shell and saw it. I think we both came into each others lives with perfect timing, we saw what we needed in each other and we went for it. It was totally unexpected, and I never thought I, Of all people could fall in "love" across the internet. But when you meet someone who uses their words as so much a part of themselves you get to know more of them than you think.

We continued talking, just as friends. One day she emailed me, with an almost nervous "tone". She had emailed me to ask me a question. Neither of us thought an online relationship could work before we witnessed it first hand. She asked me "out" and we decided to be an online "couple", as lame as it sounds it was the truth, we both needed each other.

****INTERMISSION****Insert your favorite lame romantic music here* laaadiaaaaa...LA LA LAAAAA.

We supported eachother, comforted eachother, and loved eachother in times of need, and we were both in need. We went through a lot emotionally, and it was wonderful to have someone "there" for us. We joked about the idea of oneday seeing each other, thinking about the possibility of it actually happening.

At first our relationship was secretive, we didn't want our parents finding out for various reasons, hers more so because she could've gotten into seriuos trouble giving out personal information. Her parents were afraid of the online predators that would hunt down such girls such as her. Of course I wasn't one, but they wouldn't have known and that's why it wouldn't have been good if they found out. We grew still, and escelated to the point of secret phone conversations, trying to make sure our parents didn't find out. I still remember our first conversation, she compared my voice to a strangled elmo because I was so nervous Hahah! Sad.

We eventually both told our parents in our own ways, hers wasn't quite intentional but still it came out none the less. Things went over smoother than we thought, we broke the idea to them of us possibly meeting sometime in august. We still thought it was just a fantasy though see...something always in the distance.

Much Time passed, And summer came, I graduated, and one might think things would get better when summer came along. That wasn't the case, things tended to get emotional but we hung on to each other because we knew there could still be something there. It was really hard being apart from each other, it was like we were putting so much effort into something that wasn't real.

We grew close and experienced a lot together, and I loved her very much. We realized that august was nearing, and everything we had been hoping for was actually about to become a reality, it threw me into a state of misbelief. I would soon travel many miles from the land of OKlahoma, up to Colorodo. 750 something to be exact. We had knew eachother for almost a year at this point. soon we packed up our luggage and headed out, and something I never thought was going to happened happened! I was going to go meet her! KFC! the girl I'd longed to touch for so long! *SNIFF* It was really tough man. I think Kfc (AKA SILENCEe) will agree with me that it sucked.

we drove and drove and ladida, found our hotel. at this point we were plenty comfortable talking on the phone together. I was really nervous, but more exited than anything I believe.

We planned on staying for the weekend, and I admit I had my fears of what it would be like, if she would be the same person I knew online or totally different.

That friday morning I met her, and I greeted her with open arms and for the first time we touched. I was so happy. *TEAR of romantic sadness, SNIffff* wahhHH...I love YOU KFC!!!

anyways. *dries eyes* This happened this last weekend. I totally fell in love with her again and we grew more comfortable with eachother than we ever thought we could be. I had the best weekend of my life with her, We spent it doing all kinds of things such as hiking up a mountain of death, that's one of her all time favorites. ^___^

We hugged, loved, held hands, flirted and danced and did all the things normal couples do that we never NEVER thought we'd be able to do. I couldn't believe I found someone who seemed so perfect, caring and understanding on myo, and she was real. I could reach out and touch her. We both had fears the weekend wouldn't go so well, But it exceeded our wildest dreams.

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH KFC!!! LOVE!!! I hope you all enjoyed this romantically sappy, BUT TRUE!!! story. ^__^ *sniff* it brings a tear to my eye. I hope the best for Kfc and I'm so grateful I can have someone like her in my life!!!

We got along so great, everything went so wonderfully. It was great to meet her family and friends, and I found out that she was the same girl I met online, just the real version. The exact same, and I was the same to her.

Who knows where our relationship could end up, doesen't this seem like it'd never happen in real life? I guess nobody knows for sure, but we've gotten this far against who knows what odds. It was like a fantasy that became a reality.

So I'm here to say dreams can come true, So go dream and love and don't regret any of it!!! : )

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Featured Quiz Result:
NOOOOoo0000 my masculinity!!!! XD
Your Brain is 67% Female, 33% Male
Your brain leans female
You think with your heart, not your head
Sweet and considerate, you are a giver
But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you!
Ohh intruiging..I guess that's true, but I am affected by actions..Hah, if a had an ipod that is. XD
You Communicate With Your Ears
You love conversations, both as a listener and a talker.
What people say is important to you, and you're often most affected by words, not actions.
You love to hear complements from others. And when you're upset, you often talk to yourself.
Music is very important to you. It's difficult to find you without your iPod.