Thursday, November 10, 2005
|To tell you the truth, I don't know why I'm posting this. I'm just so damned depressed and upset at how things have been going for me on the net.|
It hurts when you think you know somebody, but then true colors appear when one misunderstanding occurs. I thought things were cleared up, but apparently, I am one of those people they couldn't give a damn about.
Send me off and toss me to the side like an old shoe, if you must. I would've hoped to, at least, talked it out. I am not a mother figure and never intend to be.
Sorry for saying these things. It has nothing to do with any of you and I don't want you thinking it is. The only thing I'll ever ask for is complete honesty from my friends. Please no sugar coating. That's what got me into trouble in the first place. One word of honesty and I'm on a person's hate list. Why? Do I come off as someone who enjoys treating people like a child? I don't understand and probably never will. I've learned that when two people are FAR too different in terms of morals and thought processes, there will be friction. And, in my case, a complete loss of a friend I thought I knew.
I haven't cried over the loss of an internet friend since lilmissyprissy died, so this recent one hit me hard. It's okay, though. I'm not expecting sympathy from anyone. I just needed to get this out. I want to reach out to someone, but I've learned not to do that over the internet. It only gets me in trouble.
I honestly don't know who to trust, anymore. I feel lost, alone, and afraid.
Sorry, again, for this rant.