Monday, January 10, 2005

My Greatest Fear
My Fear

My thoughts scare me to the bone
No choice left, I have to fight this war alone
That crowded room wouldn’t do
The first chance I got, I withdrew

As I walk the night, I draw cold steel
I wonder how my own stab would feel
Sliding between two ribs deep into my chest
Could this be enough to get rid of my unwelcomed guest

He told me, my life should be so much more
Then living this way, every day a chore
The time draws near when I must choose my way
Demons are loose in my head, should I let them stay

They’re guiding me steadily to my doom
But I sheath my knife and head back to her room
I take a glimpse at her and know she will never be the star of my life
The thought makes me sorry I have yet to use my knife

I sit their wishing I could be gone
God why haven’t you sacrificed this lonely pawn
Falling forever, please let me stop
I’ve fallen so far, I can’t remember being on top

There is a girl I’ve known close to thirteen years
Only five times have I let her glimpse my fears
Seven days a week, She is the one who will let me talk
In fourteen weeks she has yet to say, “Take a walk.”

With her help I have a chance to succeed
The cuts still come, but at least my heart won’t bleed
For her sake I’ll give this life another try
I’ll try to live life to its fullest until I die

My only chance is to leave this town
If I stay here my soul will drown
Can a friendship exist when you need more
Every night I fall to sleep dreading what Fate has in store

Can Death sooth my pain if I just gave in
I think I might die alone without my kin
How I long for a family to call my own
Without the love of a good woman I’ll never have a home

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