Tuesday, November 4, 2003

   To audition or not to audition...
Well, auditions for our school's spring musical are taking place this weekend. I saw our last spring musical and I loved it. It inspired me to try out for future spring musicals. I have the urge to get on stage and sing and perform. I guess you could say that the musical woke the performer inside of me. ^^;;

Well anyway, last week there was a meeting for information for our next spring musical. I got the music sheet for chorus tryouts and I have memorized the song. But now... Well, I've lost my self-confidence. I don't think I sing badly, but I don't know if I'm good enough to get in the musical. I told some of my friends and they think I should audition anyway. So now, I believe I really should audition, but I just need to sign up first, which should be easy.

Now, we also have the chance to try out for a part. I don't want a long role, but there is one main character that doesn't talk until the near end of the play, so I'll try out that role. They say if we don't make it for a role, we can be automatically be put in the chorus, that is, provided our singing talent is good. I actually don't think my acting is bad, though. I doubt it is, because back at my old school, when we had to do school plays, my teachers and friends would tell me that I did a really good job at my role. So, at least I have confidence in my acting talents. ^_^
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Sunday, October 26, 2003

   Service Hours
Oh man, yesterday was the most tiring day I have ever lived through, not to mention one of the longest too. At my school, we have to complete a certain number of service hours, according to what grade we are in. Juniors have to do 12 hours per semester. On Wednesday, I signed up for a program called the Yam Jam. And about two weeks ago, I also volunteered to help out at my old school for their Halloween Carnival. And how fortunate I was that both events happened on the same day which was yesterday. *rolls eyes*

Well to start off, I woke up yesterday at 6:30 to get ready and go to my school where volunteers were supposed to meet for the Yam Jam. My dad dropped me off a little early and the buses didn't leave until 8:10. It took us almost an hour and a half to get to our destination. Man I was bored during that ride. I couldn't sit next to one of my friends, because the seats near him were taken and my other friends were on the other bus, so I had to sit next to someone I didn't know and found a bit annoying. When we got to our destination, which was a large field, we were put to work. What we had to was pick and sack some potatoes. It wasn't so bad, except we were told that the weather was going to be in the lower sixties, but it was a lot warmer than that. In fact I think it turned out to be in the eighties. So, since we expected cold weather, most of us were wearing coats or sweaters, so we got hot while we were working. We worked for about two hours and then we got back on the bus. On the way back, we stopped at a joint KFC and Taco Bell. One of the bus drivers said he wanted McDonalds instead, so he and some others got back on the bus and headed to one. I stayed and ordered a nice large popcorn chicken combo. It was quite appetizing. Anyway, the bus came back and we headed back to the school. While waiting for my mom to pick me up from the school, I wandered around the neighborhood and looked for a park I went to during my sophomore year. By the time I found it, I decided to rush back to the school, in case my mom had already arrived there. Luckily she hadn't arrived yet when I got back. After she picked me up, we got home at about 2.

Since I was gone all morning, I had missed my morning cartoons, but fortunately, I recorded them while I was away. I relaxed and watched one of my taped cartoons and got ready to go to the Halloween Carnival at my old school. I got there at 4 and was put to work, again. I had to mop the bottom bathrooms, take out the trash, and when the people began to arrive for the carnival, I was in charge of supplying candy for the booths. I worked until 8, when my mom, who brought my nephew, came to pick me up. We stayed for a little bit, then we left and went to McDonalds, where I tried out an Oreo McFlurry. I saw a person eating one earlier that day and I wanted to try one out, which turned out to taste really good. When I got home, I watched two more of my cartoons, took a shower, and went to bed. And thus ended a very long and tiring day. ^^;;
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Sunday, October 19, 2003

   Time sure does fly
Friday was a pleasant day, Saturday was lazy, and today was semi-lazy. At school, Friday was the day people could dress up in black and white clothes. That day was a very relaxing day. Got to sleep in late, since I had late arrival. When I got to school, I worked on my Chemistry homework and waited for the bell rang. English, second period, we had a substitute and we got to watch the movie The Crucible, which wasn't bad, but we didn't get to finish it. One of my friends finally got to sit next to me since other guys would usually take up seats next to mine, but on Friday there was an extra desk so my friend got to sit next to me. My next class was gym and we got a study period, I guess since it was a dress up day. Some of the guys decided to play basketball, while the rest sat on the bleachers and talked with each other. I finished up my Chemistry homework and hanged around my friends. It was a very relaxing class and so was lunch. Then came Chemistry, which wasn't as relaxing as the other classes, though. We got lecture notes, did some homework in class, and got back our tests from a few weeks ago. We got them late because some other people had to make up for the test because they were absent. And then the bell rang and we were free.

That night, I went to the Homecoming football game at our school. I met up with my friends Alicia and Kelly and then I met their boyfriends. Alicia's boyfriend wasn't very talkative, but Alicia informed me he wasn't in a good mood. As for the game, the other team was really, really bad. The score was 64 to 0. You kind of had to pity the other team. The only thing I didn't like about that night was the fact that I didn't bring a coat or wear a sweater. It was freezing!

Yesterday was just a lazy Saturday. I missed the first episode of Yu-Gi-Oh in the morning since it was at 7 AM. I woke up at 7:30, so I had just missed it. I got up and watched the my other shows and spent the rest of my day on the internet and moving in my new entertainment center, which was previously owned by my older brother.

Today was only semi-lazy. I woke up at 9, ate breakfast and got on the internet. I then began writing in my book, which I hadn't done since May. I was going to write more but I had homework and was noticing some interesting conversations taking place at Dimension 3, the web site where I was previously working at. Apparently everyone decided to quit the project and hold a meeting to start a new project. Well other than that, I've been playing the game I bought last week, Final Fantasy Tactics Advance. It's a very good game and very addicting. Heck, I've been bringing to school everyday and have been playing it. ^^

One thing I want to mention. I have been having a dream with the same person the last two nights. The guy I am dreaming about is actually one of the main characters from the second part of my book. One interesting fact: I haven't told this guy that he is a main character, in fact he doesn't even know me! So why is he a character? I actually cannot think of a good reason. I wanted one of the characters who is a junior, the rest of the characters are sophomores, one is a freshmen, and one is not even in high school. For some reason, I thought this guy was a good choice, though some of people I know thought I should've made another choice. Well anyway, I usually take dreams to have meanings. I don't think they predict the future. Well, I just thought I'd mention that. I love having dreams. Mainly because my friends are usually always in my dreams.
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Thursday, October 16, 2003

Just another day
Today, I turned in my order form for my class ring. To be honest, I had a hard decision. My parents helped me decide last night actually. I finally had it narrowed down this morning except for one little thing. Should the stone be cut or smooth? May have been a simple choice, but I actually had a hard decision on this one. I finally decided on smooth, but I'm thinking maybe I should have chosen for cut. >_<

Not too long ago, I just quitted a project. Jacob and one of his friends created a website(http://dimension3.proboards15.com/index.cgi) where they create video games. I created the story for the first project, but I have lost interest in the project, not to mention, we were working very slowly. Well, we didn't have many members, 7 I think, so of course we didn't get things done fast. But anyway, I quit the project because I lost interest, I have school to worry about, and I want to finish one of my personal projects. I assured them that I don't mean to quit the team, but rather just the project.

In fact, one of the projects I'm trying to get done is my own personal book. A two part book to be exact. I started the book early this year, I think it was February. I have written 12 chapters and posted 10 at the OtakuBoards. The book has characters based on my friends and myself. What happens is that our school gets taken over by terrorists from another world. I think it's quite interesting and so do my friends. I haven't written in it since May and I truly want to finish it. I am having fun with this book and I want to see what my friends will think about it when they all read it. ^^
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Sunday, October 12, 2003

   Another week gone by
Yes, yes, I know in my last post I said I was going to talk about Monday on Tuesday, but I got busy. But here I am. ^^

Anyway, on Monday, Jacob came with me to school. The day started out on the funny side. Boy visitors to the school are supposed to wear collared shirts and slacks. Well, Jacob wore a collared shirt, but he wore jeans. I personally thought it would be okay since I have seen some other visitors wear jeans. Luckily, the Dean let it slide since the freshmen had free dress that same day. Anyway, Jacob brought with him some roses that he was going to give to a girl for her birthday. He was going to give them to her before classes, but he changed his mind because he didn't want to make a scene. I think that was a good idea, mainly because the girl was in the cafeteria, where a lot of students were hanging.

First period for me was Late Arrival, so Jacob and I wandered around the school, sat in the halls and the library and talked. Well then came second period, which was English class. When I got permission from my English teacher to allow Jacob to come on the Thursday before, she told me he was going to have to spend the class in one of the offices. That was a very stupid thing. We were only taking a quiz and getting lecture notes. Why did he have to leave for that class? Well, when we got to the classroom, Jacob sat next to me. The rest of the class came in and I introduced them to Jacob. Then one guy, also named Jacob, came in. Now this guy usually likes to have his seat, but because of Jacob, the seating arrangement was moved a bit. The guy came up with the idea to take a chair and put it next to my desk so that he could have his seat back. I tried to get the guy to let Jacob stay where he was, but Jacob went ahead and took the chair that was next to my desk. It didn't really matter where Jacob sat anyway, since my teacher came to me and said to take Jacob to the office. I brought Jacob to the office and when I went back to class, the class began asking me why Jacob had to leave and when I told them that the teacher didn't want him in the class, they thought that was pretty stupid as well. Anyway, later on the day, Jacob told me that he already hates someone's guts. No, not my teacher, but the other Jacob. He told me he hated his tone and how he made him move. I was surprised Jacob could hate someone he just met in less than 5 minutes.

When class ended, I started to head to the office to get Jacob, but I saw him sitting on one of the benches in hall reading a newspaper and had a plastic bag. He told me that when I left him in the office, he walked out of the school and wandered around the area and bought a newspaper from a gas station and came back a few minutes before the bell. It was kind of weird because the doors are locked during classes, but Jacobb managed to get in easily. I must admit, that was pretty funny, but that was kind of a stupid thing for Jacob to do. I mean, what if the teacher changed her mind and let Jacob come in the class, only to find out that he left? Well, anyway, My next class was gym. That turned out okay. That was the same class I had with the girl Jacob brought the roses for. He gave them to her, but we noticed that she had a lot of other flowers and balloons then. I'm pretty sure she loved the flowers, though. Jacob almost killed me during the class, because we were lifting weights and he gave me more weight than I usually lift.

We had lunch, where Jacob met Alicia. Alicia had broken up with her boyfriend, but they got back together the previous day. She didn't really talk to Jacob. Jacob was like expecting her to scream at him or even slap him because he tried to go after her and another friend of mine, Monica, at the same time. After that, Jacob said he wanted to leave. I personally wanted to hit upside the head for that. I told him he is supposed to stay because my teacher for the next class is going to be expecting him to be there. I don't want to be held responsible if something should happen if he isn't where he's supposed to be. He did stay for my next class, Chemistry, which was pretty boring. We mainly got lecture notes and watched a video on a lab.

I think Jacob found that day boring, which actually was boring. Some days are actually more fun than that one day. Later, Jacob and I talked about the day. He told me he found some of the people immature. I asked who was immature immediately because most of the people he met were my friends. He only mentioned two people that were in my Chemistry class. Those two are my friends, but not good friends, but nonetheless he shouldn't have called them immature, a little annoying, I'll admit, though. Had he made a bad comment on my good friends, I would've been ready to knock him flat.

Well other than that, I went to our state fair on Friday, which was pretty fun. I saw some people from my school, but I didn't really know them. Well, one of them was my friend, but I couldn't get his attention because he was on his cell phone. Later on that day, I went to our school's football game. It was actually pretty boring. Not a whole lot of people were there. I sat by one of my friends, though and talked to her. I'm pretty sure the next game will be packed because it's our Homecoming game. Actually I think Jacob will be coming with me to that game and I think he's also bringing a friend. That should be fun.

Now I'm sleepy. I'm thankful I have a day off tomorrow. ^_^
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Monday, October 6, 2003

   Tired. Need sleep...
I just finished my five page report for my AP US History class on Samuel Adams. It was easy, but yet hard at the same time. All the info I needed was all there, but trying to find it and summarize it was hard.

My friend Jacob came with me to school today because he had a day off today. I must say it was quite odd having him there. I'll write more about it tomorrow, because right now I wanna sleep. Ahhhhh, sleep is good.
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Tuesday, September 23, 2003

   Ugh....
Right now I feel a little annoyed. I'm annoyed with the people I'm living with right now. Those people being my dad, mom, and older brother. Don't get me wrong, I love them and never want anything bad to happen to them. But right now, they're getting on my nerves. I confused because I don't know whether that's just a part of life and is something that goes away after a while.

I'm currently not doing all that well in one of my classes, which is AP US History. My parents aren't exactly pleased with this. I want to stay in that class, but I need to study hard to stay in there. My parents are telling me the same things I keep hearing when I'm not doing well in a class. The same ol' "You should spend less time on video games/internet/watching TV and more time on studying." I really want to yell at them: "You think I don't know that?!" It's really ticking me off when they keep telling me the same things that I hear everytime. They have to know that I know the consequences and what I have to do, I don't need to be constantly reminded of this. I don't know what's going on in my life and I really don't want to bring that up because they'll just tell me stop consuming my time on those things as well, when they don't know that those things are really important to me. These things include a group I'm in that trying to create a video game and my friends. My mom is annoying me more and more with her loud chewing of food and the same goes for my older brother. Not to mention my brother is just about annoying as hell. When I need some peace and quiet when I'm watching TV my mom, dad, and brother are jabbering away and I keep telling them to at least lower their voices a bit, but do they? No, they don't. I'm really tired of being here. I like it when I'm alone in the house. I love going to school because that's where I'm with my friends.

I'll admit that if it weren't for my family, I wouldn't have most, if not all, of the things I have that I treasure the most. One family member that I love being around the most is my baby nephew, Tyler. I love that kid. He always manages to put a smile on my face. It's just too bad that I see him like every weekend, depending on my brother's work schedule. If you thought I just had problems at school with my friends, then you're wrong. In my house, we have our different problems. I'm surrounded by problems in like every place I go.

Okay, I'm depressing myself right now, heh. The truth is, I don't think I've been surrounded by so many problems as I am right now and it scares me. I guess a teenager can never have too many problems to deal with. I just really feel like breaking down right now.
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Thursday, September 11, 2003

   Oy, I've been sick for the past three days. Who or what I got it from, I'm not sure, because it could be anyone since almost everyone in my house has been sick lately and so have some people at school. Everyone's sick! I hate being sick, especially with what I have now. A sore throat and a sinus problems. The sore throat's kind of gone, but I have been sneezing my butt off all day!

I had something personal post yesterday, but there were problems with the phone cables here and I couldn't get on all day yesterday. How I got through the day without the internet is beyond me, lol. Anyway, something happened yesterday that kind of made my day. It was during my third period class, which is gym. I was not feeling all that energetic to do anything, since I was sick and all. Throughout the entire day, only one person noticed that I was sick, that person was my friend, Brian. Before we started running, Brian noticed I didn't look too well and asked me why I looked down. I told him I was sick and he told me that maybe we wouldn't be doing anything in gym that day. Well, we jogged half a lap and went into the weight room. We had to do three sets of thirty seconds push ups. We had to do as many as we could. Since I wasn't feeling all that well, you could tell that I didn't do that much, but yet I did more than some people. I managed to do a total of 47 push ups. I think the highest was 78 and it was Brian who did that much. I wasn't really surprised, because he's in good shape and pretty strong. After that we jogged another half a mile. I think I might have pushed myself too hard on the jogging, because I definitely didn't feel better afterwards. I felt like vomitting. Luckily I didn't though. ^^;;

After that we were done for the day. I was feeling worse than before. When we went back to the locker room, I was ready to collapse. Brian noticed that I wasn't looking all that well and asked if I was alright. He told to sit back and relax, which I did. I got dressed and went to the gym, where we wait until the bell rings. When Brian got out, I thought he was going to sit next to his other friends, but he didn't, he came and sat next to me and asked one if I was feeling better. I felt a bit happy after that. Some people would ask me why something like that would make me happy. Well, the truth is, besides him, another friend, Alicia, and my family, have never really asked me if I was okay when I was sick. At my old school, I have been sick a number of times, but not one of my friends really asked if I was alright. That made me think how I was placed in those people's lives. Although, I noticed that two of them turned out to be good friends, Jacob and one of my friends back then, Ben. I haven't kept in touch with Ben since then and Jacob, I never really thought he would be a good friend. Jacob was one of the guys that teased me back then, but since then, I think he has matured and grown up. So when Brian kept asking if I was alright, made me happy, because I think it helped me realize exactly who my friends are.

Since a few weeks ago, I felt that Junior year at high school will be a year filled with tests. Tests in education and tests of friendship. Since I don't have a lot of friends in my classes, I feel that I'm being tested on my beliefs in the powers of friendship. What happened yesterday was probably just a taste of the upcoming tests.
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Thursday, September 4, 2003

   Two Kinds of Chemistry is a bit too much
Well, another day has passed. I only have to say one thing to say about one class right now and here it is: I hate Chemistry. Too much work just to friggin' do metric conversions. Well, at least I know how to do them now. About two days ago I was having such a hard to time to even start the problem. And it doesn't help having to do about 60+ of those problems.

Today felt nice. I managed to have a nice conversation with one of my best friends, Alicia. I haven't talked to her much since the school year began so I was glad to be able to talk to her. Another one of my best friends, Jacob, wants to meet her, because he goes to a different school, and ask her out. However, she's dating someone at the present.

I introduced Alicia and Jacob over the phone and they seemed to hit it off pretty well. Jaocb wanted to ask her out, but he had, I guess you could say, a plan. He wanted me to set up a get together with him, Alicia, me, and one of Alicia's other friends. I asked him why he couldn't just call her and ask her out, but his answer was that he didn't want sound desperate. Personally, I thought was a pretty dumb answer. Well, I never tried to set his get together, and I met up with Alicia last week. She told me about her new boyfriend. Apparently she wanted Jacob to call her and ask her out, but since he never called her, Alicia was asked out by another guy and now they're a couple. Alicia told me today how she is mad that Jacob never did call to ask her out, but now that she has a boyfriend, she still wants Jacob to call and have a nice friendly relationship. I told Jacob this, but he still wants me to set something up. I tell him that he, and he alone, should make an initiative move and I gave him Alicia's cell phone number. He said he wouldn't call tonight, but he said he'll call her someday. I just wish he would just call her already because this is a little ridiculous.

Be pretty cool if two of my best friends start dating. They better not break up though.
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Saturday, August 30, 2003

   Maybe now it begins...
Well, I just came back from our school's first home football game of season. Not to mention it was the first football game that I went to, well, for my school at least. I mainly came because I thought it would be fun to actually go. In a way, I'm glad I did go. I didn't see any of my friends and I was prett much alone, next time, though, I'll try to see who's going to the game. There were some people that I knew, but I never really talk them. Near the end of the game, I was noticed by most of them. There was one girl that I knew a little and she saw me and said, loudly, hi to me. Right then, the group turned and looked at me. I just responded with a weak wave of hello. Kind of embarassing now that I think about it. ^_^;; Well, at least I was noticed. I left with about six minutes left of the fourth quarter. It was pretty obvious who was going to win, because our school was ahead by forty points. The other team was pretty pathetic.

In my last post, I stated I was going to talk to someone about my personal feelings. I have been under a lot of things lately and have been feeling depressed and lonely. I want to talk to someone I can trust that will give me advice. I already told one of my friends, Jacob, that I was going through some personal problems, but I didn't give him any details. I told him that I would tell him everything once I find a friend to talk to and I told him I didn't feel he was the right person to talk to. Right now, I feel almost anyone can be the person I would turn to. I just hope this person I choose is a good choice. I really want to get everything off my chest. For some reason, going to the football game made me feel a sense of hope. The type of hope that lets me know that happiness isn't that far away. Maybe junior year will start looking better from now on. I hope so.
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