myOtaku.com: nonomi

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1989-04-12
Gender
• Female
Location
• Boise, ID
Member Since
• 2006-09-08
Occupation
• Senior High School Student
Real Name
• Nonomi

Personal

Achievements
• Having a Naruto FanArt and a FFVIII FanArt make me artist of the week in Junior High
Anime Fan Since
• ...o_O 2001? I think. I'm not completely sure...I liked Pokemon as a kid...And an anime Peter Pan
Favorite Anime
• Neon Genesis Evangelion and Boogiepop Phantom
Goals
• Teach English in Thailand
Hobbies
• RPing, Drawing,
Talents
• Drawing, singing,

myOtaku.com: nonomi

Tuesday, November 7, 2006

Listen to your heart
It's stuck in my head...As well as the Asshole song...It goes like this:

"He's an asshole, he's an asshole,
He parks in handcap places where handicap people make handicap faces,
He's an asshole, he's an asshole"

I dunno how the rest goes. ;_;
but yeah...You know when somebody you really truely and honestly love denies you and it hurts?...Shakesprear [SP?] said that it is better to love and to lost, than to never have loved at all...Most people say that it's BS...I don't. It's always different for each person, though, because two years ago, I said that it was BS, and that I'd rather have not loved at all, but now that I'm more mature, older and have had a bit more experience living with the pain of a one-sided love, loving my ex, I understand now what he meant...and it's not so bad...i lift my head higher than before, knowing that everything's alright, that even though I'm no longer with him, and that he no longer loves me, the world won't fall apart like I thought it would...I won't break...I'm stronger than that, and will continue to be. Sure, it hurt horribly, and it's a year and a half later, but I healed...And now I smile with pride to say, "Yeah, I dated him, and even though we're not going out anymore, I love him and we're still friends."

To my knowledge, he knows how I feel...After we broke up, though, he started to retreat into himself, running away from the pain of being cheated on by the girl he cheated on me with. I told him not to, and knowing that he was in pain, it put me into further pain. I tried to tell him to get out of my life...That knowing him and loving him was just far too painful, that knowing he was in pain tore me up inside...He asked me if that was honestly what i wished, and I cried uncontrollably. Of course I didn't want it. Of course I wanted to be near him all the time. I told him that I didn't mean it, that I was just running away from my problems, that I didn't want to be hurt anymore...that I didn't want to know he was hurting anymore...i love this man, and every single time I talk to him, the butterflies in my stomach act up, my head gets light and my face hot as I blush uncontrollably...John, I love you, and always will...You were one of my first loves...and I will always be with you in spirit. I don't care if you love me in return, or even care if I exist...As long as you're happy, I will be, too.
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