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Hi, this is Lauren. I don't have much to say here, PM me sometime, leave a long gb signing.

I'm not around that often, I have a habit of disappearing, so bear with me.

I have a myspace. Find me there.

Full Metal Panic-Sore Ga, Ai Deshou

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Hmmm, what to say but I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I haven't been here...that I disappeared again. I just had a lot on my mind. A lot.
My aunt died recently. It was really sad...she helped raise me, and she even still lived with me. Finding her dead...was just traumatizing. I didn't show up for school in weeks.
I, myself, went to the hospital a lot in my absence from myO. I kep collapsing. I couldn't breathe. Those kind of things.
I start my new classes tomorrow.
Honors Geometry
Advanced Placement College United States History2
Honors English 2/Honors Literature
Drivers ED/Guidance
Should be harder, I heard...
However, there's this guy I met. And...he took my heart hostage. I had my first kiss today...it was indescribeable. It was amazing.
And here I thought I was going to be asexual all my life. I was going to be that creepy cat lady who lives at the end of the street in that big ominous house with the creepy front yard full of dead trees. Might not want to kick your ball in there...you wont get it back.
I hope everyone's doing okay...and forgives me for being a total mess.

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Sunday, November 25, 2007

I trust everyone had a good Gobble Gobble Day?
Mine wasn't as bad as I was expecting, considering it would be the first holiday without my dad. I guess the family (including me and excluding my brother) had too much to drink to care. Haha ^_^
I'm hanging in there school-wise. I've managed to get Distinguished Honors (thank god). And I'll be doing more things for my health, since I the guidance counselor thinks I'm physically and mentally unhealthy.
I'll be taking more vitamins and an iron supplement (for my iron definency anemia), and a good long walk at least 4 times a week. She's trying to prescibe me pills for depression, but I don't want them, and some pills for my asphergers disorder (kinda like autism). It's funny, since the disorder is pronounced just like assburgers. My friends make fun of it all the time now, but it's all in good humor.
My mom is trying to convice me to stop my normal weekend routine of 4 hours of sleep Friday night, and nothing on Saturdays...but I need all that awake time for my homework! So I'll have to suffer those long hours.
Except this weekend...I totally ran out of gas, and had a depression lapse last night. It was so bad that I had to turn in early...but I couldn't sleep despite being dizzy. There was this freaking beeping noise that no one else (conveniently for them) could hear. I ended up shivering on the couch plugged into my CD player...*sigh*
That was the extent of my week!
How is everyone else?

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Thursday, November 15, 2007

*sigh* Don't read if you don't like pointless ranting
I feel like such a bum.
I don't go out...I haven't even shown my face around school in ages.
I guess that makes me more of a hermit than a bum...but whatever.
My head's a bit screwy.
I cried about a lot of things last night...and when my eyes stopping springing a leak, I couldn't remember why I was crying. It freaked my mom out so much that she said I didn't have to go to school...and that I could take my time. But she can't keep covering me for long.
She wants to get me a shrink.
I wonder why I don't wanna go to school...hmmm.
I'm totally behind all my school work. GAH
I miss all my friends, and I miss being on the otaku all the time.
And my insomia keeps getting worse.
I destroyed my laptop...I threw it and the back popped off, and a bunch of wires and mircochips fell out.
I feel like I'm eventually gonna snap and seriously hurt either myself or the person around me.
My brother broke the piano bench...
My parents keep stealing money out of my bank account. All my life's savings are gone.
I've lost some weight! =D
Well...I guess I'm just posting to say that even though my life basically seems like it's going down the toilet...I'm still alive.
Ah...what can ya do? =[

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