Jump to User:

myOtaku.com: Ebony

Welcome to my site archives. 10 posts are listed per page.

Pages (35): [ First ][ Previous ] 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 [ Next ] [ Last ]



Monday, November 13, 2006


War. Rape. Murder. Poverty. Equal rights for gays. Guess which one the Southern Baptist Convention is protesting.
Hey! How be you all? I be goo’ I be goo’…

Been playing with Internet codes all day, and DAMN they’re picky ‘lil bastards. I hate ‘em X___x

I also drew two pics, but I ain’t done with ‘em, so you ain’t seein’ em, heh.

Squee, here’s a fun ‘lil poll I made, and it’d rawk if you took part X3

What kind of colored pencils do you think I use?
What kind of colored pencils do you think I use?
Prisma
Crayola
Rose Art
Foohy
Colorific
Venus
Some other brand
Whatever the hell I find
Create Free Polls


Yeaaah. I finished that stupid speech debate thing on modern piracy today, which is awesome…It’s supposed to be 2 minutes long, but it’s about 3 X____x Ah, well, the teacher dude said it’s better to go over the time limit than under, so ‘s all good.

I downloaded about 5 different versions of Kuja’s ‘lil theme (Thank’chu Chiru!) And now I wanna learn it for piano, ‘m gonna have to find it somewhere. X3

I still have chemistry homework….L

Random pics of DOOOOOOM!!!

















(that one’s for you, TimTwins13, LOL! XD)









Fact ‘o the Day:

Most teen-age boys think about sex once every 5 minutes.

(Jeebus! Horny ‘lil fucks! XD)

Pickup Line ‘o the Day:

The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name.

‘M off to do muh homework and then draw some more…been having a ‘lil drawing spree lately…

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Dirty Joke)

There was this guy who really took care of his body. He lifted weights
and jogged six miles every day. One morning he looked in the mirror
and admired his body and noticed that he was suntanned all over
with the one exception of his penis, which he readily decided to do
something about.

He went to the beach, completely undressed, buried himself in the
sand, except for his penis which he left sticking out.

Two little old ladies were strolling along the beach, one using a cane.
Upon seeing the thing sticking out of the sand, she began to move it
around with her cane, remarking to the other little old lady, saying,
"There really is no justice in the world."

"What do you mean by that?" the other little old lady asked.

She replied, "Look at that....
When I was 20..........I was curious about it
When I was 30..........I enjoyed it
When I was 40..........I asked for it
When I was 50..........I paid for it
When I was 60..........I prayed for it
When I was 70..........I forgot about it
And now that I am 80, the damned things are growing wild, and I am
too old to squat."

Comments (11) | Permalink



Sunday, November 12, 2006


'Ey! Umm...not much to saaay. Just sat on my ass all day and read, colored, and drew...I really need to be doing my homework and clean my room, but, hey. It's still Saturday. XD (here, anyway)

Some of you loverlies asked about my dad's work, plane, blah blah thing. Here's a crude map:



Yeah, we be livin' somewhere in that general area. Not sure exactly where XD He works 12 hour shifts for two weeks, then comes home for two weeks, and leaves to work again. Yup, yup.

A lovely, dear friend is still wanting to do art trades and requests (preferably art trades), and there's five slot things still open. The first five to get to her are lucky 'lil biatches. Just leave a comment on her site or PM her.

Here she be:

Suzaku12

:3

Hey, one artsy might be up later (hoorah)

*sigh* FunnyJunk ain't workin', so I'm gonna have to give you some offbrand, less funny pics...

Random pics of DOOOOOOOOOM!!!!









Omfg...OMFG...OMFGAAAWD! EEEEEEEEEK!!!!! *bounces* OMFG! LOOOOK! It has ALBINISM! OMFGAWD! *hyperventilates* SQUEE! X3







Those be 'lil hammerhead shark pups :3







Fact o' the Day:

Helen Keller (1880-1968), blind and deaf from an early age, developed her sense of smell so finely that she could identify friends by their personal odors.

Pickup Line 'o the Day:

Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?

'M off to...do something X__x

OMFG OMFGAWD! My Axe! By ICP! I haven't heard this song in FOREVER! *glomps radio* I wuv you X3

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Dirty Joke)

An old man is sitting on his front porch one morning when he sees a young boy walking down the path carrying a roll of duct tape.

"Hey boy, what ya gonna do with that roll of duct tape?" The man calls out

"I’m going to catch me a load of DUCKS with this here duck tape!" the boy responds.

"Ah! You silly. Any idiot knows you ain’t gonna catch a duck just cuz it’s called DUCK tape!" the old man bellows as he laughs.

That afternoon he sees the boy walking back up the path dragging at least 20 ducks all wrapped in the duct tape. "Well I’ll be damned. That sum’bitch got him some ducks with that duct tape" the man mumbled to himself. The next morning he sees the same boy walking up the path only this time he is carrying a few sheets of chicken wire.

"Hey boy, what ya gonna do with them sheets of wire?" The man calls out.

"I’m going to catch me a load of chickens with this here chicken wire!" the boy responds.

Thinking that the boy could not duplicate the same stroke of luck he had the previous day, the old man mocks him the same way he had the day prior.

"HAHA! You ain’t catchin no chickens with chicken wire!"

Sure enough, later that afternoon, the man spots the boy again walking up the path with at least 50 chickens entangled in the chicken wire. "Well shiver me timbers! That sum’bitch did it again!" The man says to himself.

The day after that, the man sees the boy once again walking up the path only this time he is holding a fist full of flowers. Perplexed, the old man calls out to the boy,

"Hey boy, whatcha got there this mornin?" The old man calls out.

The boy responds: "I got me some PUSSY WILLOWS"

The man nearly falls out of his chair as he yells,
"FUCK ME! HOLD UP I’M COMIN WITH YOU!!!"

Comments (10) | Permalink



Saturday, November 11, 2006


Hey, sorry I haven't been on the past few days, my internet (for some unholy reason) would NOT WORK! DX

But it's working now, so it's all good :3

My daddy-kins was supposed to come home today, but the fog and wind is keeping him at work...he rides a plane from home to work, and vice versa.

EEK! New artsies are up! (Yay!) Though I'm only fond of two of 'em...lol.

'Ey, a friend wants to do request pics, and the first ten to comment or PM 'er gets to have 'em done.

Here she be:

Suzaku12

:3

Random pics of DOOOOM!!!





























Fact 'o the Day:

There are more television sets in the United States than there are people in Japan.

Pickup Line 'o the Day:

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

'M off to draw some more...or somthin'...

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Dirty joke, courtesy of kingN)

there was the lady and she went to this church and she sat at the front row. the pastor was preaching and then the lady started crying. so after church the pastor pull the lady to the side and ask to talk to her in his room. so they go in to his room and the lady being truly good looking the pastor couldnt help but stare. so the pastor ask why she was crying and she say's"well this guy called me a bitch and it hurts" and the pastor tells her that he's sorry to hear that and ask her to tell the story so she tells him" well first i was walkin and he got close to me" so the pastor say like this and gets close to her. "then he put his hand on my butt" like this, so the pastor puts his hand on here butt. "then we went back to my place and he started kissing me" like this and the pastor kisses her."the we start havein sex" like this and they have sex then after that she starts were she left off"and after we had sex i told him i had AIDS" and the pastors says"aw you fuckin bitch"

Comments (14) | Permalink



Thursday, November 9, 2006


Gawddam, lol. I don't have the rubric for my debate paper, so I can't do it, and it's due tomorrow, so I'm just gonna say I "forgot" my binder and stuff at home, lol! I'm so happy I don't have school this Friday...lifesaver, heh.

My cousin's here, and is spending the night...he goes to the same school as I do, and rides the same bus. He actually used to live with me before he moved in with his bro.

One of the most annoying habits he has, though, is falling asleep on MY bed. Do you know how difficult it is to wake him up? I had to sleep on my couch many a time.

Random pics of DOOOOOOOM!!!

























Fact 'o the Day:

"Soldiers disease" is a term for morphine addiction. The Civil War produced over 400,000 morphine addicts.

Pickup Line 'o the Day:

(With hands on shoulders) Oh, those are shoulder blades, I thought they were wings.

'M off to color or somfink...

TTFN, babes.

P.S. ( Semi-dirty Joke...a bit lame, but...eh)

The big game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone about his skills as a hunter. The man was undoubtedly a good shot and no one could dispute that.

But then he said that they could blindfold him and he would recognize any animal’s skin from its feel, and if he could locate the bullet hole he would even tell them what caliber rifle was used to shoot it.

This was a bit too much for the other customers, and soon a heated argument was going on. Then the hunter said that he was willing to prove it if they would put up the drinks, and the bet was on.

They blindfolded him carefully and took him to his first animal skin. After feeling it for a few moments, he announced, "Springbok." Then he felt for the bullet hole and declared, "And shot with a .22 rifle."

The others could not believe it (he was right of
course) and the argument was even hotter than before. When some started to suggest that he must have peeped, he said that he was prepared to do it again. He would put up all the drinks they had bought before against them buying another round for him.

So they blindfolded him again, very thoroughly this time, and they brought a skin that someone happened to have in the trunk of his car. He took a bit longer this time and then said,
"Kalahari Lion," and fingering the bullet hole, said, "and the rifle was a .308" and he was right again.

This of course was like throwing fat on the fire, and he had to prove his skills, over and over again, every time against a round of drinks. Finally he staggered home, bombed out of his mind, and went to sleep.

The next morning he got up and saw in the mirror that he had one hell of a shiner. So he said to his wife, "Listen I know I was drunk last night, but not too drunk to know that I did not fight anyone in that bar. So where did I get this black eye?"

And his wife replied angrily, "From me, of course!"

"But what did I do?" he asked.

She replied, "You got into bed and put your hand down inside my panties. Then you fiddled around a bit and announced in a loud triumphant tone, "Skunk, killed with an ax!"

Comments (12) | Permalink



Wednesday, November 8, 2006


'Aight, 'aight...

I'm bored...

Yeaaaah. In English, we're doing a debatable thing, and I'm doing it on Modern Piracy, where the law enforcements that go against the piracy SUCK. Seriously, modern piracy is FUCKED UP. I'm talking about real pirates, that sail the oceans. No, they don't wear midieval clothes with cutlasses and eyepatches, lol. Often times they're crazy Hispanics with high-powered guns lookin' for some "goodies".

Excitingful.

ANYWAY...Blah.

Random pics of DOOOOOOM!!!























GO HERE! XD (And pump up 'da volume!)

Kitty, Kitty...

Fact 'o the Day:

Ovid (43 B.C.-A.D. 18) made the following observation about 2,000 years ago: "Women are always buying something."

(Dude, we're a lot like our ancestors, eh? XD)

Pickup Line 'o the Day:

All those curves, and me with no brakes.

I'm off to draw. Yeh.

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Dirty Joke)

Whats the difference between a woman and a washing machine?

You don’t have to hug a washing machine after you drop your load in it.

Comments (13) | Permalink



Tuesday, November 7, 2006


Very, very true...

I stayed home today...'kuz I was...sick...yeah. Sorta. I told my mom I had a headache, my throat hurt, and I had cramps to the point that I was gonna die, but I actually only had a sore throat. Ah, the glories of speechcraft...Lol XD

Mum made me clean today, though...icky. Not fun.

OMFG! OMFGAAAAAAAWD! Demon Goddess drew a kickass artsy trade, go look. Go look NOW or I'll cut off your genitals and feed them to...something. I dunno. Something big, bad, and bestly. XD

Demon Goddess's kickass trade!

Thanks so much! X3

I'm gonna have a drawing fest tonight, drawing all the pics I've had in mind for awhile...heh. Yeah.

Random pics of DOOOOOM!!!!



















No idea why, but that cat made me laugh my ass off O__o





Fact 'o the Day:

The little bits of paper left over when holes are punched in data cards or tape are called "chad."

Pickup Line 'o the Day:

(leaning over to whisper) I think about you when I masturbate.

I'm off to draw :3

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Joke, you may have to think about it in order to understand)

A man wakes up one morning to find a bear on his roof. So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there’s an ad for "Bear Removers." He calls the number, and the bear remover says he’ll be over in 30 minutes.

The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He’s got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit bull.

"What are you going to do?" the homeowner asks.

"I’m going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I’m going to go up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat.When the bear falls off, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage In the back of the van."

He hands the shotgun to the homeowner.

What’s the shotgun for?" asks the homeowner.

"If the bear knocks me off the roof, shoot the dog."

Comments (14) | Permalink



Monday, November 6, 2006


Guh, I've been doing homework FOREVER! And I'm STILL not done! What in the FLYING FUCK!

Ah, well...

I'm not used to living in "poverty", and that's exactly what I've been doing for the past week and a half. It's probably not the same type of poverty you would consider poverty, but...it's weak poverty, 'aight? No toilet paper, no HEAT, almost no edible food, and no hot water.

Yay.

My mum fixed that today, though. Yay for grocery shopping with 70 bucks! Lol XD We're almost out of wood for the stove, though D:

I be watchin' Jarhead for the second time...It's a pretty good movie, it illustrates the mental part of the war more than actual fighting, which is a first...heh.

Theme pic 'o the Day:



LULLIUS Raymundus Arbor scienti, also known as The Alchemy Tree. It branches alchemy levels, and the basis of life, heh.

Eeek! Many thanks to Kuronekosama for doing an art trade featuring Vincent! She made him all albinoish! THANKS SO MUCH! *huggle* X3

The rest of you go look at it or I'll send you off with Morte...did I ever mention Morte wasn't only a necrophiliac, but a murderer? Exciting...ANYWAY! GO LOOK! :D

Kuronekosama's Awesomely awesome art trade!

X3

RANDOM PICS OF DOOOOM!!!!























Fact 'o the Day:

Joseph Priestley, the English chemist, invented carbonated water. It was a by-product of his investigations into the chemistry of air.

Pickup Line 'o the Day:

Brrr! My hands are cold. Can I warm them in your heaving breasts?

I'm off to take a shower (YES!) and finish up some stupid ass homework I have...lol.

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Dirty Joke)

Johnny wanted to screw a girl in his class,but she belonged to someone else.One day Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said I’ll give you a 1000 dollars if you let me screw you,but the girl said NO.Johnny said I’ll be fast, I’ll throw the money on the floor, you bend down,I’ll be finished by the time you pick it up.She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her boyfriend.....so she called her boyfriend and told him the story.Her boyfriend says ask him for 2000 dollars, pick up the money very fast,he won’t even be able to get his pants down. So she agrees and accepts the proposal.30 mins goes by and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend 2 call. Finally after 45 mins the boyfriend calls and asks what happened.She said "THE BASTARD USED COINS!!!!"

Comments (13) | Permalink



Sunday, November 5, 2006


*falls over dead* I have a shitload of homework. Glorious, huh?

Well, turns out my computer was being a spaz, and that's why the new icon wouldn't come up...heh. Ah, well.

One artsy is up. Yeah.

Theme pic 'o the day:



'Tis Alquim, yup, yups.

Well, I started playing my old Oblivion game (the one with 62 hours on it) and for some reason, the dude I was supposed to kill just...appeared. Before, he wasn't there 'kuz there was a glitch, but now he IS. Sooo...yeah. I killed him, and yeah. I'm playing the 62-hour game, again. Lol XD

Random pics of DOOOOM!



















Fact 'o the Day:

When glass breaks, the cracks move faster than 3,000 miles per hour. To photograph the event, a camera must shoot at a millionth of a second.

Pickup Line 'o the Day:

I wanna put my thingy into your thingy.

Well, i'm off to do some more homework...*sigh* Sometimes I think my teachers hate me DX

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Series of dirty 'lil jokes)

Roses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour!

Kissing Is A Habit Fucking Is A Game Guys Get All The Pleasure Girls Get All The Pain 10 Minutes Of Pleasure 9 Months Of Pain 3 Days In The Hospital A Baby Without A Name The Baby Is A Bastard The Mother Is A Whore This Woulda Never Happend If The Rubber Hadn't Tore!

Roses are red Grass is green Open your legs And I'll fill you with cream!

Hickory dickory dock This bitch was suckin my cock The clock struck two I dumped my goo And dumped her to the end of the block!

Roses are nice violets are fine. I'll be the six if you be the nine.

Comments (14) | Permalink



Friday, November 3, 2006


Bwah. Sorreh I wasn't on yesterday, I almost died. For you see, I had skipped school, and the wicked witch called "Mommy" had decided to punish me by making me work. I had to clean out hard to reach places, drag heavy boxes full of glass around, and move furniature up and down stairs. (with help, of course)

But at least she didn't take my 360 away...my precious...*strokes it*

Hmm...new month = new theme, so I might play with that later...yush...Mweehee. I've been thinkin' about alchemy (not overrated FMA shit, people. REAL alchemy. Whee!)

Some new art might be up later aaaand...yeah. Maybe. Yeah. If not...oops? X3

Random pics of DOOOOOM!!!



























Fact of the day:

Koalas and humans are the only animals with unique prints. Koala prints cannot be distinguished from human fingerprints. (they look the same)

Pickup Line of the day:

Fuck me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before?

I'm off! To draw...and...yeah. Play with muh site's theme. Yeehaw.

EDIT: WTF?!?!? OIDSHJOTIHEWOIRHT! I'm pissed. I'm fuming. I shouldn't be, but I am. My icon. Will. Not. Change. Yes, it's under 125 x 125 pixels, it's under 50 KB, it's a .JPG image (I even tried it as a .GIF!)...so WHAT THE FLYING FUCK?! Omfg, I'm pissed. Very.

Pissed.

Help me out, and I'll draw you a request picture of your choice.

Seriously. You read right. A request picture. Mhmm.

Ich bin wütend! DX

TTFN!

P.S. (Dirty Joke)

On the 40th wedding anniversary, the husband looked at his wife’s pussy, wept and said :
"40 years ago I felt like eating this thing but now it looks like it wants to eat me!"

Comments (14) | Permalink



Tuesday, October 31, 2006


Wheeee!

Well, I got 6 hours in on Oblivion. That's nothing compared to 62, but I'm getting there.

Slowly XD

But I made my dude the palest, prettiest Imperial EVAR! Just...goddam, he's goregous. Took me awhile to get 'im that way, but hell, it was worth it >83

Random pics of DOOOOM!

























Fact of the day:

Levan, Utah is "navel" spelled backwards. It was so named because it is in the middle of Utah.

Pickup Line of the day:

If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

I'm off to *attempt* to draw. Or play Oblivion, if that doesn't work. XP

TTFN, babes.

P.S. (Semi-dirty joke)

WOMAN: Doctor i have an infection in my vagina!
DOCTOR: How often do you have sex?
WOMAN: About once in 6 months.
DOCTOR:That’s not an infection, lady! That’s RUST!!!!

Comments (15) | Permalink

Pages (35): [ First ][ Previous ] 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 [ Next ] [ Last ]