Sunday, August 13, 2006

   AH...almost back to school
Sorry I haven't been updating, but Ive been on myspace and...well on vacation.

Anyway, lucky me starts school on Sept. 5, way later than anyone else, and I get out early becuz I'm graduating 8th gr. But Sept 5 is coming faster than I thought and I am not ready to go back to school. I mean I miss being around alot of people, but when I got there I will hate being around that many people and more than half of the I won't know.

Well lifes a bitch.....so train it.

(haha get it, life a BITCH, a female dog, so train it. Haha...lame I kno)

(p.s if you want to contact me on myspace then go to www.myspace.com/liickoffthepoiison K?K. C ya)
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Friday, June 9, 2006

   Rest In Peace
Yesterday....I had a dream that I was walking down the aisle in a church and I wasn't meeting the man of my dreams at the end nor' was I wearing a white wedding dress. Actually I was wearing the complete opposite. Black; a long black depressing dress; and instead of prince charming was my father. Not as alive as I would have perfered, actually not alive at all.

As I was walking down the aisle, I glanced around me seeing sorry faces and teary eyes. I smiled knowing that the smile was anything, but real. It was faker that plastic water droplets on a plastic rose. My eyes were bloodshot now that I had to face reality; my lifeless father.

And something inside of me died...my fear to cry.

I cried so hard, and so long, I was afraid that all the water that my body is partly made of may have just evaporated.

I see so many faces as I sit in the front. My best friend, Jorey, walks by and then my best friends father walks by, Mr. MacCaskill.(Yakira's Daddy) And this just makes me cry harder knowing that I will never see my own father again.

The funerals over. People are walking out. I race through them looking for the bathroom. I find it and change, no matter who leaves this world I refuse to stay in a skirt longer than needed.

While I am eating in the great hall, still in the church, a number of people come up to me and tell me how sorry they are; the sad thing beiong is I didn't know half of them.

When everyone relocates to my house my crying has stopped and completely disappered.

Then I wake up ,not really waking up at all, because this was not a dream.

(This is in memory of my father who pasted away June 4th. May He Rest In Peace Now And Forever.
I LOVE HIM!!!)

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