Tuesday, July 12, 2005

   The Raven by Edgar Allan Poe

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore-- While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. "'Tis some visiter," I muttered, "tapping at my chamber door-- Only this and nothing more." Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December, And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor. Eagerly I wished the morrow;--vainly I had sought to borrow From my books surcease of sorrow--sorrow for the lost Lenore-- For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore-- Nameless here for evermore. And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain Thrilled me--filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before; So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating "'Tis some visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door-- Some late visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door; This it is and nothing more." Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer, "Sir," said I, "or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore; But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping, And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door, That I scarce was sure I heard you"--here I opened wide the door-- Darkness there and nothing more. Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals ever dared to dream before; But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token, And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Lenore?" This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, "Lenore!"-- Merely this and nothing more. Back into the chamber turning, all my sour within me burning, Soon again I heard a tapping something louder than before. "Surely," said I, "surely that is something at my window lattice; Let me see, then, what thereat is and this mystery explore-- Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;-- 'Tis the wind and nothing more. Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter, In there stepped a stately Raven of the saintly days of yore. Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he, But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door-- Perched upon a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door-- Perched, and sat, and nothing more. Then the ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling, By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore, "Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou," I said, "art sure no craven, Ghastly grim and ancient Raven wandering from the Nightly shore-- Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's Plutonian shore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly, Though its answer little meaning--little relevancy bore; For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being Ever yet was blessed with seeing bird above his chamber door-- Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door, With such name as "Nevermore." But the Raven, sitting lonely on that placid bust, spoke only That one word, as if its soul in that one word he did outpour Nothing farther then he uttered; not a feather then he fluttered-- Till I scarcely more than muttered: "Other friends have flown before-- On the morrow he will leave me, as my Hopes have flown before." Then the bird said "Nevermore." Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken, "Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is its only stock and store, Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful Disaster Followed fast and followed faster till his songs one burden bore-- Till the dirges of his Hope that melancholy burden bore Of 'Never--nevermore.'" But the Raven still beguiling all my sad soul into smiling, Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird and bust and door; Then, upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore-- What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt, and ominous bird of yore Meant in croaking "Nevermore." This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom's core; This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining On the cushion's velvet lining that the lamp-light gloated o'er, But whose velvet violet lining with the lamp-light gloating o'er She shall press, ah, nevermore! Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer Swung by Seraphim whose foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor. "Wretch," I cried, "thy God hath lent thee--by these angels he hath sent thee Respite--respite and nepenthe from thy memories of Lenore! Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe and forget this lost Lenore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." "Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil!--prophet still, if bird or devil!-- Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore, Desolate, yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted-- On this home by Horror haunted--tell me truly, I implore-- Is there--is there balm in Gilead?--tell me--tell me, I implore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." "Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil!--prophet still, if bird or devil! By that Heaven that bends above us--by that God we both adore-- Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn, It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels name Lenore-- Clasp a rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore." Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." "Be that our sign of parting, bird or fiend!" I shrieked, upstarting-- "Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Plutonian shore! Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul has spoken! Leave my loneliness unbroken!--quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door; And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming And the lamp-light o'er him streaming throws his shadows on the floor; And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor Shall be lifted--nevermore! ~~

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Monday, July 11, 2005

   feck it

I'm not very happy right now becasue last night my mom hogged the computer and today plus some of yesterday my bro hogged it, and obvioulsy I'm not happy about it. Good thing about yesterday was I did go to my cool uncle's [with many computers and swords] house and met my new little cousin. He's not very old and looks like an alien. So instead of getting my anger on all of you here are the lyrics to the mp3 that's playing [[see featured quiz results, below]]. Gackt, Lust for Blood aimai na tamashii wa subete o wasure toketeyuku miserareta kizuato ni tomadoinagara te o sashidasu My uncertain soul melts entirely into oblivion While I'm puzzled by the visible scars, I stretch out my hand masshiro na manazashi wa saigo no toki o moteamashiteru nagareochiru sono namida wa modorenai ano hi no yakusoku In a bright white field of vision, at the end, time is uncontrollable The tears running off won't come back, the promise from that day dare ni mo tomeru koto wa dekinai futari dake ni yurusareta wakare no namida wa kurikaesu ayamachi o koko de owarasu tame no kako no yakusoku No one could stop them, the tears only we could forgive at our parting The past promise we made to stop the mistakes from repeating over again taemanaku afuredasu yokubou wa mitasarenai honno sukoshi no aida de ii..., hito no sugata ni modoritai I was unfulfilled by the constantly overflowing passions If only just for a little while..., I want to return to human form kokoro no itami o keshitekureru no nara mayowazu koroshiteokure yo samishii kao wa shinai de, saigo gurai wa waratte hoshii omae dake ni wa If you're going to erase the pains in my heart, then go right ahead and kill me Don't look so lonely, at least at the end I want you to smile Just for you kokyuu o kurikaesu hitsuyou na mono wa mitsukarazu subete no yasuragi o kowasu onaji ayamachi o kurikaesu Take another breath You can't find what's important Destroy all of the peace Make the same mistake over again dare ni mo tomeru koto wa dekinai futari dake ni yurusareta wakare no namida wa kurikaesu ayamachi o koko de owarasu tame no kako no yakusoku No one could stop them, the tears only we could forgive at our parting The past promise we made to stop the mistakes from repeating over again Gackt, I love that song~~ [[EDIT]] Check out Master Marik's new forum: YourOtaku!! Tell 'em Death T-2 sent ya. ^_~

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Sunday, July 10, 2005

   icky...

Last night I ate too much American food. Today I feel like crud. So you like the poem from yesterday? It's one of my favourites! ^_^ My dad really likes it too becasue it's from an old Halloween episode of The Muppet Show. Yesterday I had a 12-hour workday. At 9 A.M. there was 3 hours of horse camp, a party from 1 to 3, and then I went to a horse show with the other workers and my boss and we didn't get back to the barn until 9 P.M. Then when I got home Dad wanted me to do a half-hour of chores! That ticked me off really bad! >_< He never mentioned it and I had to do it becasue my brother had done yardwork at some point. I hated that... OK, so I said I'd answer questions today. That shalt I do. But by no means are these the only questions you may ask, I encourage many many questions! ^_^ X CaNNoN:how was it like in Japan? Did you go to Mount Fuji? In a word; AWESOME!! No, I didn't go to Fuji-san but I did fly over it twice. 3v1l-m1nion: did u have fun in japan??? Only an unbelievable amount of fun!! I did everything from touring to going to school! I ate eggs cooked in sulfer vents, swam in a pool with about 50 cute Asian school guys [1 even said "Hi"!], I got baptised, and a ton of other things! demon dragon: where did u exactly go to japan and where did u stay? I'n not allowed to disclose exact locations, but I went to Hokkaido; the northern island. In a week-long tour my grandparents set up, I stayed in several hotels [one was HUGE and really expensive! it had the pool with the 50 cute guys], and the rest of the time I stayed in my grandparent's house. I also went shopping at the HUGE mall, bookstores, restaurants, 100 yen shops, art/stationary store, and other places. junkoba kaiba: What kinnda hotel did you stay in? ...You knwo aren't there like normal ones then the traditional ones wear you get to sleep on the mat things? I didn't stay in any traditional holtels, but the hotel with the pool had several yukatas in every room to wear to the pool. That was nice ^_^ Then after supper that hotel had fireworks EVERY NIGHT! YamiYugi1990 How was your time there? What did you eat? Was it fun? Did you site see? I ate ramen, rice, fish, soft cream, udon, jingeskan [I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!], spagetti, French toast, McDonald's, and tons of others. I was great to eat! lol What did I see... I saw a Sulfer Mountain, Hell Valley, marimo, tons of rice fields, and, uh... memory lapse... Too much! Daff-Power: did you make new friends in Japan? Yeah! On thecouple days I went to school I did! I made friends with an art teacher and her manga club [they gave me some AWESOME goodies!] and some other girls from a different school. They asked for my address, so I hope to be getting a letter from them sometime. Baka No Hanyou: CAN YOU PLEASE TELL US EVERY FUCKING DETAIL?! EVERY LITTLE JAPANESE CONVO THAT YOU HERAD?! Um... How about I tell you with a picture story? ^_^; I've got 4,000 pics from 4 Japanese weeks so... destinyssweetman: what was your favorite part of the trip? That's a tough one! I think when I was a student for a day. that was really great! Did you know they have ten minutes in between every class and they only need a 30 to pass a test?? Of course, the tests are WAY harder than in America... Elske29: -We all know how glamorous and shiney life in Japan can be, but what are the more rural areas like? -Do people grow bonsai trees in their gardens? -What does Japanese sushi taste like? -Come to think of it... What was the most outrageous thing you ate on your trip? -Did any of the locals yell at you for being a 'damn tourist'? -A list of stuff you brought back! Please! Rurals places are kinda like... rural places... Most neighborhoods have their own vending machines, nearly ever day is a day to take out a certain kind of trash, and some people like to grow veggies and stuff in their yards. Yes. Sushi is rice, and all that was good! But I tried some fish and it was tasty also. Umm... either the school lunch or eggs cooked in sulfer vents. No. They just stared at me. I'll show ya with the picture thing. OK? Well, that's pretty much it. L8rz!

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Saturday, July 9, 2005

   The Fears of Zero [Mostel] written by Jerry Juhl

Late. Late at night. When the world sleeps. You are there alone. You have come to face your fears, unknowingly. They are there...your fears. They are always with you. Lurking, scurrying, hiding, waiting. They are there, and then they suddenly disappear. Though they may be gone they are never far and late at night you can confront your fears. There they are...confronted fears! Fears of hunger, fears of pain, fears of missing that last late train. Fears of dentists always drilling, fears that no one will be willing.... to see you as you know you really are. However, once these fears can be counted and compelled... they can quickly be dispelled... like figments of your own imagination. Still, there are other fears. Fears of snakes, fears of cats of black, fears of dread and disease and fears of rats. Fears of that black unknown terror...of never coming back. Fears of elevators falling, or the tax man one day calling and the uninvited crawling of yourself deep within a clammy, dank, dingy cellar where the spiders weave about your fingers and the worms, and the bugs and the creepy crawly things that squirm and squiggle at your feet. Yet, once these fears can be counted and compelled, they can quickly be dispelled... like figments of your own imagination. Then there are other fears. Fears of bullets, fears of blades, fears of dread. Fear of something metal connecting with your head. Fear of word loss when most needed and the fear of something never being said Or waking up one morning, only to discover you are dead. Yet, once these fears have been counted and compelled, they can quickly be dispelled... like figments of your own imagination. Then there is the last fear. It has a name. Just about the time you are past fear. The one that really is final. It will come. Yours...and mine. In the darkest of the night it will come without a fight. It will count you. It will compel you. Then it will casually Dispel you. Like a figment of its own imagination.

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Friday, July 8, 2005

   My eyes are killing me

Somehow I want to put the title with the hymn lyrics, "Mine eyes have seen the glories of the coming of the Lord." What a big... nevermind. Volleyball almost took me out. But we didn't do that much!! I'm so outa shape. T_T I'll be putting up a dark theme soon, since all the white of forums are making me eyes want to bleed. URG. Then I can put up that poem I found that I really like. From the Muppet Show. You may recognize it... I downloaded a bunch of Kaiba AMV's. They really rock!! ^_________^ Now if only I can figure out how Trillian workks... Anyway. What else. Nothing else. Anything else? Something else! Oh yes now I remember. Do any of you guys have any questions about my trip to Japan? If you do: ask me. If you don't: think of something. I'll be answering any and all on Sunday. Looking forward to what you guys throw at me...

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Thursday, July 7, 2005

   Mixed emotions...

Is it coming nicely?? Whatcha think? Should I use it in a theme?? Today I'm meeting my new cousin sometime this afternoon. And while I'm at it I'll check out the house I've never been at... Volleyball practice today. Sorta excited, kind of not... You know? I haven't really worked out since before Japan. @_@ I'll be so sore tomorrow, which is when another v-ball practice is. YAAY~~? Raining today. Very very nice ^_^ I like rain and stuff. So relaxing, and perfect for reading ANGST!! ^o^ Though I won't get off until it starts thundering badly. Mom's watching Hitch outtakes now... OH!! Yesterday I went and saw War of the Worlds!! It was awesome! I thought it was really good, and my mom even jumped! XDD HAAAAHAAA! And I really liked it. The movies I really want to see when they come out are The Chronicles of Narnia and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Those are gonna be great! But my dad made an argument over how I shouldn't like ay celebrety guys. But hey, it's not like during spring vacation he didn't stop and make us watch the Ohio rowing team, which happened to consist entirely of men with great physique clothed in tight and wet shirts... Which reminds me still of my new little promo mag. Shojo Beat has hit America, now. I got the free promo mag and I must say, if Seto Kaiba were an Absolute Boyfriend I'd definitely sign up!! *_* [[droools]] But then I began to think, maybe not all manga has to be about action and...action... Perhaps there's a little bit for the heart. Maybe sorta kinda. Then I thought, "HEY! Rurouni Kenshin has BOTH!!!" and I came back to life! ^_^ What else to say... I LIKE HARD ROCK MUSIC!!! XD L8rz!

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Wednesday, July 6, 2005

   It's the part of the Jello that makes it jiggle!

Jello jigglers. Should be a screen name somewhere... My Death T-2 account on Gaia; has accumulated over 15000 gold!! my mule, SKfantheXTREME; has over 4000 gold now. ^_^ *ish a happy Gaian* But nobody is odering from my shop... ;_; And I have an insane discount thing going on. @_@ Not much else done on my Kaiba pic. I think I'll transfer and ink it today, then put it up for more crit. Yayness. Deleted more friends. Now everyone who hasn't updates since Febuary and longer is off. Not many, but it's a start. Sorry for not getting to all of your sites lately. I have no excuse. Gaia has suddenly struck an inner fancy... My bro is watching Troy now. DROP THE STUPID SHIELD AND GET A REAL SWORD!! Samurai are so much superior to Greeks! And Trojans!! My v-ball coach called. This week I have practice but next week I don't. I also have a work schedule set up for the barn. now I'm working 3 days a week, I think. XP But at least Mickey's all mine, and I get to train him as much as I want!! *insert devilly face* Not much else to say, really. Ummmm.... *dissappears*

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Tuesday, July 5, 2005

   Tomorrow is the next day's yesterday and last week' one week from now

And WHAT A STUPID TITLE!! Gyah! I never know what to put in 'em! At leat before I went to Japan it was alway "X days till Japan!" Anyway... It's a little past midnight, meaning this banana I am eating is... lunch. So I don't wake up at 5 A.M. starving. I'm still working on that Kaiba pic. Now employing the help of experienced Gaians to crit. They really don't have much to say... Aaaaaand here's my current avatar: See how well a Nitemare Scarf would go? I found out this morning [at 5 when I woke up starving] that The Chad is willing to eat banana peels. I didn't let him though... As for the dreams I mentioned yesterday. The other night I had a dream where a Japanese guy as chasing me screaming "I WANT YOU!!!" and it was creepy The other other night I had a really, REALLY fecked up dream about that anime expo that Constance has been going to. I can't remember all the details, but a lot of it had to do with "SNARF" [[this is how you guys affect me...]] and now the best of all: The dream from Japan involving Kaiba Seto Or what I can remember anyway [[shoulda written it down...]] Seto Kaiba was walking down the street, minding his own business. He had a bag of stuff for Kisara who was in the hospital with a cas of...their twins... everyone: Married! awwwww ...And all of a sudden some fangirl took him away!! everyone: BOOOO! The fangirl looked like someone from the Kaiba Seto Guild of Gaia [for some reason...] After an hour or so of this fan confessing her love to him in a restaurant somewhere, he said he was sorry but he really had to get back to his wife. The girl fell onto her face like Excel Excel of Excel Saga would've, but Seto waked away like the cold-hearted, loving perosn he is. everyone: Awwwwwww And that was my very nice Japanese Seto dream =^_^= So now that I have run out of things to say, I'll probably go browse the net a tad longer then drag my fully-awake self into bed after brushing my teeth. Oh and here's something to do when you're bored: brush your teeth. It's better then eating to death... L8rz then!!!

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Monday, July 4, 2005

alotsa stuff

I was going to go on about dreams I've been having recently [you know, the infamously odd ones?] but I won't. Thank you guys for over 400 guestbook signings!!! ^__^ And now for those pictures I said I'd put up. These are just my booty, though... Pic from the plane Keychains! From right to left: staff thing, scythe w/counterweight, reversable axe/sword, Hokkaido's famous marimo, and a bakemono [ghost] and on top, a horse keychain from year 2000 Not shown: holographic eye keychain My pride and joy Yu-Gi-Oh! R volume 1 and Yu-Gi-Oh! The Gospel of Truth. It'll be years before you suckers get the Engl, er, they're cool! And WOWW!!! that's the most you guys have ever seen of me!! The cards they came with I now have Obelisk the Tormentor from Shonen Jump, some Japanesse card I can't read from YGO-R, and Yu-Jyo and Unity from Gospel of Truth My newfound manga supplies Kent paper, tones, Copic markers, grid ruler, brushes, pens, tone tools, Copic airbrush set, Masket ink cleaner, Masket ink removing rubber junk stuff, masking film Note shown: masket ink and Copic compressed air Desktop My workcenter-slash-manga collection. Shown also with deodorant and sunscreen... Advanced Cardiac Life Support My mom gave me her old nursing ringbinder for my YGO cards. It's huge and holds over 400 cards... Well, I hope you enjoyed my presentation! ^_^ Elske29: What purple-haired guy??? And happy 4 July!! Two countries celebrate. America celebrates independence and England celebrates getting rid of us. heheh! Other countries also have 4 July, but they don't celebrate anything. but in Japan you can get the really big expensive fireworks legally. Makes America's home fireworks look like a joke. Until next time my duckies!! L8rz!

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Sunday, July 3, 2005

   Aha... AAAHAAAA!

Look! I put test under that DDR pic in my profile! *mwahaa* I uploaded the most recent pics from my camera so now I can put some of those up tomorrow, but to get the better ones I'll need to rip a few CD's. Y'know? Oh, and here's the rough draft of my latest pic. I did it in negative just to spruce it up. heheh... It was actually inspired by Dragostea Din Tei But it go's very well with the song on Master Marik's site. FECK OFF Dad I'm trying to eat!! Quit talking at me! Friday I slept well over 12 hours, starting at ??? and ending at 5 P.M. Today in church I satbeside a Korean family, and a lady who had lived in South Korea for 3 years sat behind me and stuck up a conversation about Japan. Helped me with culture shack a little, since EVERYONE at church had their shoes on. It was crazy @_@ Not much else to say, 'cept I may have to crop down my friends list. It's really long and a bunch of 'em hardly ever update. So I may work on that soon. L8rz then, mates!

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