Monday, March 31, 2008

current Mood: good
Current song: Embryo
Current Artist: Dir en grey

Konnichiwa, how is everyone? ^.^ I'm in an okay mood. Chatity's not here. She'll be here later. She had a dentist appointment. I can't wait to see her. I miss her soo much. I got only 2 comments yesterday. Grr.


Last night my dad called and started shit with me. He now knows about me and Chastity. Apparently he found my gaia. And so to him....I'm going to go to hell. Yay lmao.

My life is falling apart. yesterday Chastity gave me a scare. It's crazy and a long story. I'd rather not think about it.>.< I love Chastity with all my heart. She means the world to me. I'd do anything to make her happy.

I'm listening to Embyro by Diru. This song is soo pretty but the lyrics are soo sad. Here read them for yourself:

Dir En Grey - embryo

so, a summer morning in 1983 my beloved mother always by my side
hey, smile at me just like you always do in the sunlit morning your expression distorted

mother's neck is choked as she hangs down from the heavens bye bye, mother
with silent tears and deep pain the flower, unable to bear it, is dying I am alone

Without a Face a gasping voice
Without a Face a distorted voice

so rape me until you're satisfied that I am yours, father
but see, mother is looking down on us from up above

My Sweet Mother smiling you smile so hard it seems your heart will burst open
Deadly Sweet Mother in hatred I'll wait patiently, holding back my nausea while I'm raped

now, a winter evening in 1992 my despised father always by my side
hey, rape me again today just like you always do father's eyes wide open, burning into me

I thrust that thing I hid deeply, strongly, into his neck bye bye, Father
mother, naked, blooms in the snowy landscape crimson flowers, blooming, bloodstained I am alone

My Sweet Mother smiling you smile so hard it seems your heart will burst open
Deadly Sweet Mother in hatred the tears streaming down my cheeks dry up, as the season dries up
My Sweet Mother smiling you smile so hard it seems your heart will burst open
Deadly Sweet Mother I'm pregnant my child crying I'll hold back my nausea

Aren't they said? T.T


Last night when me and Chastity was "talking" I kept listening to Endless Rain by X Japan over and over and when he got to the part when her said "I can't find my way without you" I cried even more then I was. That's a pretty song too.

X Japan - Endless Rain

I'm walking in the rain,
though everything seems to be hurting me for some reason.
There is only nothing.
Just kill me now ... as I roam forever.
Until I can forget your love.

To me sleep is a confusing, narcotic
that only quiets the beating heart.
All my love seems to flow from my body like a heart felt memory.
I keep my love for you to myself.

*Endless rain, fall on my heart In this wounded soul.
Let me forget, all of the hate, all of the sadness,

Days of joy, days of sadness slowly pass me by.
As I try to hold you, you are vanishing before me.
You're just an illusion.
When I am awake, my tears have dried in the sands of sleep.
I'm a rose blooming in the desert.

It's a dream, I'm in love with you.
Hold me warmly in your arms.
I awake from my dream
I can't find my way without you

The dream is over.
I can no longer hear the voice of your gentle words.
Floating off tear stained walls.
So awakening in the morning, I'll move into my dreams ...
until I can forget your love.

repeat *

Endless rain, fall on my heart, in this wounded soul.
Let me forget, all of the hate, all of the sadness.
Endless rain, let me stay a memory in your heart.
Let me take in your tears, take in your memories.

Well I must be off! ttyl! ^.^

~Kyoko~

P.S.
I know this post sounds like I'm sad...but I'm actully in a pretyy good mood.


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