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Wednesday, September 24, 2003


   Legend of the Girl: November Rain
Yeah, you all knew you saw this coming . . .

November, 2001 . . . . .

I got word through a mutual friend that "The Girl" had something on her mind: she wasn't feeling capable of handling a relationship at the current time in her life.

Needless to say, I didn't sleep well that night. I eventually got a meeting with "The Girl" planned during one of her breaks on a Thursday of that month (don't ask why I remember that one).

Well, first off was the apology for having to go through the friend and not directly to me. Second off was the slow process of hearing her out. To put it simply, she was scared. She wasn't sure how anything would come about in the future, and how well we'd actually manage with school and whatever other factors were at hand (she's a single child in a traditionally-raised family, that may or may not have been an issue, I don't know). In any case, as much as I would have rathered it not be, I wasn't about to make her do anything she didn't want to . . .

To be honest, I really held no hostility towards her for any of what she said. I mean, I didn't exactly make it much easier for her (I actually went through the process of the "is it me?" question . . . ugh . . . that was silly of me . . . . .). Likewise, we both knew actually upholding something like that in our present states just wasn't gonna happen - we simply had no time.

My last note I left with her that day was cliched, unrealistic . . . and completely true: "I don't plan on giving up on us any time soon; given time, anything is possible . . ."

And that was that. She headed back to her building, and I headed home.

With certain dynamics now changed, I had more reason to stay in my lounges during long breaks, and she had more reason to leave early if she didn't have labs. And I was spending a lot more time staring at my ceiling before falling asleep . . . . . . . . . .

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