Saturday, January 29, 2005

Absalom, Absalom!
I have a strange love for the more absurd things in life. I think that's pretty obvious, or else I would not do Shinmaru vs. The World every week. The absurdities of life are just hilarious. Moreso if you don't try to think about them too much, because your mind will snap like a brittle twig if you try that.

Anyway. I was coming home from school yesterday, and one of life's little absurdities drove by me in the space of a few seconds. There was this woman, a housewife-looking lady. Conservative haircut, thick black glasses, pink shirt, and whatnot. Horrible stereotyping, to be sure, but whatever. She wasn't some gangsta chick with a bandana and tattoos up and down her body, either.

And that's a nice segue to the next part of the tale. I notice that she's driving an SUV (more proof of her inherent housewifeyness). Nothing really wrong with that, except that SUVs are big and they emit more gas than an entire season of Ren and Stimpy. But then I looked down at the wheels of her SUV, and what did I see?

Spinning rims.

Yes, you read right, she had SPINNING RIMS on her wheels. I like how after that I've basically ignored my own advice, because I can't get that image out of my mind. It's just so funny. It makes me wonder if businesswomen drive around in low riders and randomly blare out "La Cucaracha" when they honk their horns. But in a random attempt to get it out of my head, I wrote a 55 Fiction about it. Did it work? Well, not really, but I did get an amusing story out of it. Plus, I'd been wanting something to write about lately, anyway.

And then later on, after I've told Sennen about it in his myOtaku comments, Alex posted this...

Over the summer, I was pulling into the Hollywood Video parking lot, and I noticed this very dainty-looking woman coming out from the nail/hair salon a few stores down. And when I say "dainty-looking," I mean DAINTY-LOOKING.

High-heels, tiny purse, her arms almost in a 90-degree angle, tight, brightly-colored clothing...

Dainty-looking.

Guess what vehicle she gets into?

A Hummer.

A HUMMER.

That is likewise funny. I can just imagine this obscenely waifish woman climbing into this massive Hummer. The image is just hilarious. It would probably take most of the strength I have to stifle the laughter that would be begging to come out of me if I saw that. Especially if she could just barely see over the steering wheel, or something.

Actually, if that were to happen, I don't think I could hold in any laughter. Then I'd probably get run over by her Hummer (again, assuming she could see over the steering wheel), but at least I would die laughing.

And, finally, after looking at some of the comments on the article I wrote, I noticed that a couple of people informed me that, yes, there are fangirls in addition to fanboys! I know, it's hard to believe, but it's true. However, I chose to refer to that nice group of crazies with the all-inclusive term 'fanboys' for a few reasons:

1) Saying 'fanboys and fangirls' would get really annoying after a while. I decided to pick a gender and stick with it.

2) I wasn't about to use some bullshit PC-catchphrase like 'fanpeople' or something. If I did that, I'd have to drag my ass out to my backyard and shoot myself in the head.

3) I figured that women wouldn't want to be associated with fanboys in any way, shape or form. Apparently I was wrong.

So, yeah. Just some nice little things to chuckle at while life strings me along throwing random events every which way. Absurdities provide plenty of amusement, whether they come in the form of midget dogs trying to pick fights with gigantic dogs, snow in Las Vegas, or Thanksgiving.

I'm sure that you guys have seen some pretty absurd things in your lives. What are some of the more absurd things you've seen? Share the amusement with your friends.

Anyway, things are going well on this end of the world. I have mid-terms coming up, but for only three classes, I think, because it doesn't look as if we'll have a mid-term for English. That's a life saver. And the one I'll need to study most for, Info Gathering and Writing, is the last one I'll be taking. I must have made someone really happy.

Also, I caught up with an old friend of mine from high school who also goes to Cal Poly Pomona. Didn't get to chat with him for too long, but hey. I'll probably see him again sometime. Also, there's this girl in my Philosophy class that I've become friends with, though we've only talked in class lol. She's a nice person (and cute, admittedly), regardless. Perhaps something will come of this?

Hah, probably not. Watch as the powers of optimism and cynicism wage war in the mind of Shinmaru~!
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