Sunday, December 12, 2004

Shintastic
First day of vacation. Feels nice, especially right now. It's nice and cool outside, slight breeze, and I have the window open right now. Crickets are chirping in the background, loud enough so that they're clear, but not so loud that it makes me want to go outside and kill them. It's just nice right now.

Rest of the day, not so much, at least when it comes to the weather. I don't know why, but it got pretty hot all of a sudden. If it was summer, I guess that it'd be a decent day, but it's not supposed to be 85 degrees in Winter, not even in California. Usually 85 degrees wouldn't be that bad, but it just felt really, really hot today, for whatever reason. I guess I was just used to the 60-75 degree days we've been getting for the past month and a half. Damn Mother Nature, stop screwing with me, you bitch.

The heat kind of distracted me from getting much writing done today, so I was not able to work on my hero post very much as I said that I would. How very disappointing. But fear not, children, for I shall try once again tomorrow. If the weather is stupid again, I'll officially declare war on the sun. I've put off writing it for long enough, especially since I think that a couple of people ahead of me are already ready with their issues...

So, yeah, I'll get on it, I swear!! And it will rule.

With my spare time today, I played more Mario & Luigi. I'm almost done with the game, but the final boss is proving to be very tough. Fawful was pretty hard all on his own - it took me about five or six tries to beat him. Bowletta/Cackaletta is just horribly mean, though. Well, Bowletta is really easy...but Cackaletta is just hard. I always end up dying within the first 1-3 turns in the final battle.

See, after you beat Bowletta, Mario and Luigi end up within the explosion radius of some timer bomb. And that takes their HP down to one each. So, basically, you have to use your first turn to heal Mario and Luigi against Cackaletta. Not really a problem, but Cackaletta always attacks first, and it seems she always pulls out a new attack whenever I face her.

In Mario & Luigi, memorizing your opponents attacks (especially against the bosses) is key. However, I always, always get hit with new attacks that I've never seen before, without fail. I can't really dodge what I haven't seen before without a bit of luck, right? But oh well. I'll beat Cackaletta eventually, and I'll gloat about it endlessly.

Especially to my brother, who has played the game at least a month longer than I have, and still hasn't even gotten past Fawful yet. He's been beating games before me a lot lately, because I've not had as much time as I'd like to play video games. Winter Break is where I start owning my little brother to hell and back.

What smells blue? <----- Go read the thread now, people, for it is cool. Not only because of the uber-awesome thread title, but the content is quite interesting. The little bit about synaesthesia that Dagger posted was pretty neat. I'd heard of that before, though I can't remember from where I heard of it.

It's really interesting, though. Hearing something, and visualizing color. Seeing something, and hearing a distinct sound in your ears. Having the surface of something you're eating affect what it tastes like. I dunno, I find that more than a bit fascinating. Not so much that I'd spend hours on end thinking about it (though, there are few things in life that really are that interesting), but certainly enough to make me stop what I'm doing and pore over it a bit.

So, yes, go forth and view the topic, my loyal followers. Abandon the Cult of Shinmaru for a minute or two, get some intellectual stimulation, and then you can come back here, where everything shall be dumbed back down to normal again. Wait for it...wait for it...are you back yet? Excellent.

I'm feeling a bit tired at the moment. I'd like to go to sleep, but I can't. My sister's gone out to the Winter Formal dance thing at Knott's Berry Farm, and the family's just waiting for her to come home. We're such dorks lol. I wish I'd gone to one of those things, but oh well. I never had anyone to go with, and I thought people only went to those things as couples...yes, I was dumb lol.

My sister's just going with her friends, though. Just kicking back and having fun, not taking life too seriously right now. Wish I had that much sense when I was her age. But, hey, it's not too late for me not to take life seriously - I have four years of college, after all :P It's only when I graduate and join the soul-crushing workforce that I'll be forced to take life seriously. I'm sure that I'll enjoy that very much.

Yes. I'm out. Tiredness pries the Shinmaru away from typing.
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Saturday, December 11, 2004

What about Flowers for Algernon? / Well, that's not about flowers. And it's not a movie.
My quarter is officially over. I took my Statistics exam earlier this morning. It was definitely my most difficult final exam. I knew most of the problems, but there were a couple of problems that were plenty difficult to figure out. I spent about an hour and a half on the exam, whereas I spent a half hour and forty-five minutes, respectively, on my Communications and U.S. History finals.

Hopefully, I scored high enough to get an A in the class. Not entirely sure if I did, though. But oh well. A B or a B+ in the class would still be a good grade. Pretty good showing for someone who doesn't really consider himself to be much of a math-oriented person. I'm pretty sure I got A's in all of my other classes, so three A's and a B/B+ is not a bad showing in the least.

I went to the bookstore to buy a couple more books. I bought a couple books for, wait for it, nearly $114. Highway freaking robbery, man. Mr. Charlie's idea is looking better and better by the minute, much like the man himself...whoa, did I type that?

But, yeah, book prices are so ridiculous. And, of course, they're only going to get higher, because money is being drained away from the state colleges here. I'm sure that it's the same elsewhere, as well. Tuition is going up, book prices are on the rise, and the number of students that can be taken on in classes is going down. Welcome to the life of a college student, is it not grand?

And I don't even have to deal with the stress of living on my own, and paying for college out of my own pocket with a job, or anything. Hell, the crap I'm going through is literally nothing compared to what other college students have to go through. A lot of people are getting really screwed over because of how bad things are getting right now. And they aren't getting any better, let me tell you.

But whatever. I've got over three weeks off of school right now, I'd just like to forget about all of that for the time being. Now I can just relax and do whatever the hell I want for a while. It'll be real nice.

Like, I haven't started on my next hero post yet. Been waiting for a while, waiting to get a nice chunk of time where I can just sit down and write, and waiting until it's my turn to post. All I can do is wait until Zidargh puts in the next part of the issue. I can only assume that he's been busy, and is taking his time with his part so that he gets it exactly the way he wants it to be when he eventually posts it. Nothing wrong with that, really.

I have the basic layout of the post in my head, it's just a matter of getting down in Microsoft Word. My first post was just an introduction of sorts, the second post is where some real shit goes down. I had a decent idea of what I wanted to put down before I read Zidargh's post, and after I did, it gave me a good idea about the direction that I wanted to go in. I think that it'll end up real good.

I'm not really hesitant about looking to other writers, other sources for ideas. Hell, it's not like I just all of a sudden decided one day to write, just out of the blue. I've been influenced by a lot of stuff over the years, books, television, movies, whatever, and they all inspired me to develop my writing and my enjoyment of writing stories. I think that my biggest influence in writing is The Twilight Zone. I love that show to death.

If you read a few of my stories, I think that it's pretty obvious that a few of them are patterned after The Twilight Zone. A lot of the stuff I saw on that show was just brilliant, plain and simple. Great, entertaining stories that explored deep ideas and social commentary, usually within a science-fiction backdrop. The show is just godly on so many levels.

Back on track...I'll spend tomorrow working on my hero post, perhaps the next day, as well. It'll be a lot of fun. Now that I actually have a huge chunk of time for this, I'm getting excited for it all over again. I remember when I first signed up, the RPG was extremely intriguing to me. I was eager to see where it would go, where I'd be going with it. And now that I've got my opportunity to contribute, I'm intrigued all over again. I'm curious as hell to see where all this is going, and I'm sure a lot of other people are, too.

I saw Adaptation today, good movie. No real complaints about it from me. The acting, in particular, was awesome from just about everyone involved. I think that I'd have to see the movie again to fully appreciate it, though. I'm one of those people who can never have a worthwhile opinion on something after only having experienced it once. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be on again for a while, and my parents don't have the DVD. But oh well, it'll be on again eventually.

Anyway...this post was everywhere at once. All of my creative energies are focused upon the task at hand tomorrow. Hopefully I'll be able to write something halfway decent, aye? ^_~
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Friday, December 10, 2004

Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins. / Homer Simpson, smiling politely.
Introduction to Mass Communications and U.S. History, done and done. Neither test was very difficult, as was expected. The only really difficult part of the day was being robbed at the bookstore today. Not literally robbed, of course, but it might as well have been. I bought three books today with some money that my dad gave me earlier today. $108 for three used books. Christ, books are so damned expensive. I still have another two books to buy for my Communications classes, and I have no idea how many I'll have to buy for my Philosophy class, because my Philosophy professor's books aren't ready yet, apparently. At least, I didn't see her name among the other professor's whose books were ready to be bought for their respective classes.

Oh well. Stupid college. Why must all students be raped of their money?

In other news, I had like a billion hours to spare after my Communications final, so I decided to scope out where my classes would be next quarter. Interestingly enough, both of my Communications classes are in the exact same classroom as my Intro to Mass Comm class. My English class is in the CLA building (the pointy building - I've shown it in pictures on here before) and my Philosophy class is in the Engineering building. I guess engineers are also master philosophers.

So, enough of the college stuff. Onto the real topic of today's post: Guestbooks. More specifically, the hilarity that can be found within my guestbook (which I assume is the same for most people).

First, I find it amusing how much people seem to care about guestbooks sometimes. If mine didn't attract so much hilarity and oddity, I'd have turned it off ages ago. I already know who visits the site, I just have to look in the comments...lol. Also, I rarely return guestbook signatures. Is returning guestbook signatures unofficial internet etiquette or something? Maybe I'm just an ass for not returning them. But oh well. I wouldn't want to visit the sites of 75% of the people who sign my guestbook, anyway. Assholeish and elitist, yes, but hey, I'm just that cool.

Also, I've seen a few people speak of keeping their guestbooks "clean" by deleting all of the more n00bish entries. I tried that once, it took fucking forever. Too much work for something I really don't give two craps about either way. I wonder how many people are coming to my site, looking at my guestbook and thinking "Man, he has too many n00bs signing his guestbook...fuck him and fuck his site".

Come on. If anything, they'll think that after reading my daily myOtaku entries. Well, right after thinking "What the fuck is this guy on?" People with screwy grammar signing my guestbook isn't going to drive anyone away from my site. There's no point to deleting guestbook entries, really. Unless you think it'll make you look cool, anyway. "There are no n00b signatures in my guestbook, because I spent the last two hours deleting guestbook entires, yay!" Nice. Want a prize? I'd give you a life if I had one, myself.

That's part of why I don't change my layout, like, ever, too. I think it looks nice the way it is. I'll never get bored of the classic white, red and black. If anyone else gets bored of it, well, they can shove it. Of course, I doubt anyone visits sites because of layouts, anyway, and I'll admit that there are a lot of kickass layouts that look really cooler - a lot cooler than mine. But I can't be bothered to make a great one. But you never know when inspiration may strike...

But I'm getting off track.

As mentioned earlier, the only reason I keep my guestbook around, really, is because of those n00bish entires. I think they're funny. Is that mean of me? Probably. But who cares? I'm sure people have laughs at my expense, anyway. I'll highlight some of the more hilarious ones right now. I won't use names, because I'm not quite that mean, but you could just look in my guestbook if you're curious. Don't know why the person's name would matter, though.

hey kool site cum by my site sumtime n see if u like mine

One glorious typo makes this a classic. I also like Syk3's reaction to it when I showed it to him:

Shinmaru007: Hey, look at this great guestbook signature I got today:

hey kool site cum by my site sumtime n see if u like mine

Oh man, some of these are just comedy gold, sometimes :-D
Syk3 26: LOL
Syk3 26: Shin: "Sorry, cum again?"

Crude, yet hilarious.

Hello! I'm hungry, and bored! The hunger is eating my stomach! Grrrr! Man! I'll add you as a friend! Bye!

The hunger is eating my stomach...hahaha. That's so great. "The hunger is eating my stomach...I just have enough energy to sign your guestbook! *collapse*"

hey i like your site are you single? well i'll talk to yo later love you bye bye

They must like my picture. 8-)

hey cool site!..haha who knew that bubbles could be so deadly?..anways can i add you as a friend?..i hope its ok..but if you dont want..to...thats fine too..*runs off crying*

I don't know what I did to make them run off crying. Maybe they looked into the future and saw that I would be making fun of them. Oh well.

NYAHAHAAA I SHALL RULE YOU!!!!!! NOW FEAR ME!!!!

No.

HILOW WHATS UP

NOTHING MUCH HOW ABOUT YOU DUDE

interesting site. hope ya dont mind if i add u as a friend

I always find it funny when people say that. Like I'll blow a fuse, and murder their family if they add me as a friend. I think I'll sign the guestbook of the next person who says that like "YES I DO MIND THAT YOU HAVE ADDED ME AS A FRIEND, YOU HAVE NOW AWOKEN THE EVIL OF SATAN AND I WILL TORTURE YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR DAYS!!!!11!!1!!1SIXHUNDREDANDSIXTYSIX"

omfg u hav d4 b3st sit3 ev4r lolol!!!!!1111 v1s1t my s1t3 and i giv u c4ndy lolol

What kind of stupid ass signs a guestbook like this? Let's move on, I think that I hate this person.

Sh1mmaru, why don' u chang ur link colrs and bkacground!/? They hert mi ies. There lik, herting me!11!!1!1 OMG!11!! U are teh werst Muderotro on OB!1!!!111! Plz vizit mi sit, 2. Thx. BY#EE!!!111!11

This is the second worst guestbook entry ever, after that waste of space before this. Boo.

And I'm done. As you can see, I'm a jerk, and I have way too much fun with these things. In fact, I care about my guestbook a lot more than I have let on. I don't think that I could live without it, really. Besides checking up on my friends, commenting, reading comments on my posts, posting, ranting, ranting about guestbooks, ranting about myOtaku layouts, listening to Curve on James' myOtaku, plugging people, being a raging Sonic Youth and Pixies fanboy, and posting up goofy pictures, the guestbook is the only reason I visit myOtaku anymore.

And, lastly, to remind you all that, yes, I am still a raging Sonic Youth fanboy...

It's Sonic Youth on The Simpsons! And they're EATING PETER FRAMPTON'S WATERMELON~! I love this picture. Lee Ranaldo (the one on the far left) looks like he hasn't had a wink of sleep in days, and Thurston Moore (the one on the far right) looks stoned out of his mind. Kim Gordon (the girl, obviously) looks sort of frightened, because Peter Frampton is scary. And Steve Shelley (the only one left) just doesn't give a shit. Those crazy kids!

Ah, that Simpsons episode ruled. Sonic Youth, Smashing Pumpkins, Peter Frampton, Cypress Hill and the London Symphony Orchestra. How awesome is that? That's right, too awesome for words. I have a feeling that I'm missing a band that appeared in that episode, but whatever.

And I'm out. I have a Statistics exam to own tomorrow.
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Thursday, December 9, 2004

Silver Rocket
As some of you have undoubtedly noticed, there are now only two people left in the Daily Posting Contest: DDG and myself. Thankfully Unfortunately, Ben was eliminated a while ago, because he didn't post, for whatever reason. Maybe he got attacked by a wild boar.

Whatever the case, this contest is quickly winding down! Who will be the winner? More importantly, what will they win? Well, nothing, of course, I'm far too cheap for that. Although, when if I win, I'll treat myself to Resident Evil 4 when that comes out (even though I was going to buy it, anyway). But, yeah, I'm sure that the final days of the contest will be quite fun.

*uses several horribly mean intimidation tactics against DDG* ...ahem.

Anyway, today was nice. Did some last minute studying and whatever for the two finals that I have tomorrow. I doubt that either of them will be that hard, really. My Communications class has been pretty easy, and with a bit of extra studying, my U.S. History class hasn't been too tough, either. Basically, I ace the finals, I ace the classes, easy.

So, yeah, I'm not stressed over the tests. I don't like getting stressed out over tests lol. When I get stressed my mind doesn't function right. Obviously that won't be of any help when I take tests. So, I just go in with the mindset that these tests will bow down and be my bitches and I take them tomorrow. Because they will be, those bitch ass finals.

It's a lot better than thinking that I'll royally screw them up. Plus, I'm pretty good at taking tests, anyway. The public school system certainly gave me tests up the ass while I was going through school lol. I've had plenty of practice on them. I guess that's the only good thing about standardized testing, you take so many of them that you eventually get dulled to them. Or maybe that's just me and my hatred of them. They're not worth getting worked up over, because they SUCK.

Statistics final, I'm sort of worried about that, but not really. I've been studying for that for the past few days. Nothing too intense, mind, because if I study too hard, my head hurts, and then I forget everything I've studied. Generally, things stick in my head, though, I'm great at remembering things until the moment that I'm finished with a class, and then I'll forget everything that I ever learned in there (especially if it's a math class).

Statistics has been a lot easier than Calculus ever was, thankfully. If Calculus was Satan, then Statistics is his wimpy little brother, Stanley. It takes me a bit to absorb all of the information and to get a hang of it, but once I do it's pretty easy. So, yeah, the Stats final had better watch itself come Friday.

I played quite a bit of Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga today. Just like Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door, Mario & Luigi just gets funnier and funnier as you go through it. It's amazing how well written both games are. Technically they both have really thin stories, but you don't notice because you're laughing too much to give a crap about that.

Oh, and Prince Peasley is godly. I thought I'd eventually get tired of that thing he does where he flicks his hair, and then the screen lights up, but I haven't yet lol. It's so hilarious. He's so full of himself...what a great character. Prince Peasley owns all of your lameass, wish-they-were-cool anime guys.

I wish that there were more Bowser in the game, but oh well. I love the big lug. He made Super Mario RPG, he was great in Paper Mario, and he was a god among men in Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door. Honestly, Bowser might just be my favorite Nintendo character because he's always so great in every RPG that he's been in. His somewhat limited appearances in Mario & Luigi have been nothing but awesome, too.

Mario & Luigi's great gameplay goes without saying. Puzzles make great use of both Mario and Luigi's powers, and the battle system is very involving and fun. This definitely isn't some button masher RPG where you just hit buttons and wait for something to happen on the screen. You always have to be paying attention to what's happening. I can't even begin to tell you how much that raises interest in the game itself. With a lot of turn-based RPGs, I find myself hitting buttons, waiting a bit, and eventually getting bored (especially during long boss battles). With Mario & Luigi that is far from the case.

Lastly, I went to an awards assembly thing for my sister last night. It was okay, I suppose, I mostly went because I'd missed both of her plays last year, so I felt compelled to make it up to her lol. I got to talk with a couple of my teachers from last year, and a good friend of mine from last year was actually there, too. It's been a while since I've seen any good friends, so it was nice to catch up with someone.

And now I shall finish listening to Daydream Nation and then I shall get some sleep. I have a long, test-filled day tomorrow =(
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Wednesday, December 8, 2004

Always Look On the Bright Side of Life
Today's been a downer. Nothing bad in particular happened, just general moodiness. One of those days where you just feel down for no real reason at all. Where you just think about a lot of things, and everything wears on you and bugs you.

I think that I'm a bit too self-conscious for my own good. I doubt that I seem that way online, but if you saw me in person I think that it'd be fairly obvious. The few people on here who have met me in person know how generally quiet I am. In the back of my mind, I always worry about how people perceive me. It's never really a huge focus of mine, and I don't really obsess over it, but it always lingers, and it affects a lot of what I do and say, in person.

Generally, I think that my quiet nature is more of a defense mechanism than anything. When I was in elementary school, I got picked on for various reasons. Too many to list, little kids will pick on other kids for just about anything. Also, something happened when I first moved here when I was in 1st grade that has had a rather large effect on me. I don't really like talking about it that much, even though I'm basically forcing myself to get through it. Sometimes it seems silly that something that happened over eleven years ago could have such an adverse effect on me for so long...but at that age, I guess these things sink a bit deeper.

I've made some strides, though. I used to be a lot quieter than I am now, which is absolutely amazing to think about. When I was younger, I'd almost never talk, I'd purposely avoid people, sit in the back of classrooms, get really nervous when teachers called on me, the whole shabang. I was pretty withdrawn into my own little shell, and I even blocked my family out for the longest time.

But I've come a far way. I'm still not very outgoing at all, at least at school, but I'm really open with my family now. If you saw me at school, and then you saw me with my family later on in the day, you'd be amazed at the difference. Opening myself up a bit has generally made me a happier person. I like my family, and I get along with them pretty well, despite whatever difference we have between us.

Also, I used to be a bit embarrassed about some things that I liked and disliked. In middle school, the whole school was basically one giant bandwagon, and if you didn't like what other kids like, you got ripped on. I kind of just fell in line during middle school, because I'd been made fun of constantly, and it was just wearing on me to a massive degree. Looking back, that's exactly why I hated middle school so much. I became this person I didn't want to be at all.

For all of high school's faults, at least I was able to be my own person there. People somehow grew up enough to stop being bandwagon hoppers, even though there were cliques abound. I never had any part of that, though, because I'm not a big fan of cliques. They exude this really elitist attitude that I'm just not very fond of at all. But, yeah, I did a lot of growing up during my high school years, pretty much with only a couple of good friends.

I'm still working on everything else, though. I don't think that I could open myself up all at once, it'd be a total disaster. As much as I'd like to be this really outgoing person, I don't think that I could manage it all at once. It would be too drastic a change from how I am right now. Baby steps are working fine for now. I think I'll get to some sort of middle ground, someday.

Right now, I'm satisfied with myself, for the most part. I don't think I'm a terrible person, and I like who I am, inside and out. I just wish I were a bit better at opening up and making friends with people. I don't need a million friends clinging onto me all at once, but I basically haven't gotten to know anyone at all so far in college. I'm not just talking girls, this is in general. I see people in class, we talk when we're in groups, and that's it. After leaving a few of my good friends after high school, it's more than a bit lonely at college, sometimes.

Occasionally, I'll be a bit frustrated, because I see others and how much more of life they've experienced than I have. People do things that I've never had the opportunity to do, or haven't been able to give myself that extra push to try. I never feel worthless because of it, but it leaves me with a somewhat jealous feeling. You know, like Why not me? or Why can't I do that?

Lately, though...things don't get to me quite as easily as they used to. As I've grown, I've gotten better at putting things into perspective a bit. Whenever I think about these things now, I ask myself how old I am. Currently, the answer is "Nineteen years and eighteen days". People joke all the time about how old they are at this age, but I'm really not very old at all. Nineteen years is a long time to be doing a lot of things, but in the game of Life, nineteen years is basically nothing.

And I think to myself, well, I have lots and lots of time left in my life to do things. Barring some kind of freak accident, I have decades left in my life. There's no rush for anything, I don't need to hurry up and live my life at a hyperkinetic pace like a lot of people seem to want to. I'm barely a freshman in college. The more I think about it, the more I enjoy living life at my own pace without living up to the standards that other people set. I'll get things done eventually. Baby steps.

Anyway, I feel much, much better now that I've gotten all of this written down and out of my head. I don't like doing these types of posts very often, because I honestly don't feel that I have that much to complain about in my life. Moreover, I wouldn't want anyone to see this and start worrying about me, or something. I don't enjoy making people worry, mostly because I'm a big worrier, myself, and it never feels good. So, I hope I haven't brought anyone down or anything. Tomorrow won't be like this, I swear!

To end the post, I'll post some lyrics. I think that a lot of the time I seem like a really bitter, cynical person, but I think that I'm a lot more optimistic than I seem. There's loads of bad stuff out there in the world, but fuck it, I say. I try to stay on the bright side of things (ignore the irony that I like cloudy weather more than bright weather), because when you're just thinking about the bad things in the world, then nothing will ever improve. Nothing will ever change. Anyone can look at the world and say "This fucking sucks", but it takes a real person to say "This fucking sucks, but I'm not going to let it get to me, I'm still gonna do something". That's how I like to look at things.

Anyway...the lyrics. This song is from the end of Monty Python's Life of Brian. I won't ruin the ending scene for anyone, because it's one of my favorite movie endings ever, I'll just say that I love it to death. It's hilarious, but it's so charming at the same time. Normally a song like this would be really sappy, but in the circumstances in which it's sung in the movie, it just makes me smile. Alex knows what I'm talking about, I'm sure that he has a big grin on his face when he hears this, too :)

"The Bright Side of Life" written, composed and sung by Eric Idle.

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse
When you’re chewing on life’s gristle
Don’t grumble give a whistle
And this’ll help things turn out for the best…
And…

…always look on the bright side of life…
(whistle)
Always look on the light side of life…
(whistle)

If life seems jolly rotten
There’s something you’ve forgotten
And that’s to laugh and smile and dance and sing
When you’re feeling in the dumps
Don’t be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle
That’s the thing
And…

…always look on the bright side of life…
(whistle)

Come on!

Always look on the bright side of life…
(whistle)

For life is quite absurd
And death’s the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin give the audience a grin
Enjoy it- it’s your last chance anyhow

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath
Life’s a piece of shit
When you look at it
Yes life’s a laugh and death’s a joke it’s true
You’ll see it’s all a show
People laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you

And always look on the bright side of life…
(whistle)
Always look on the right side of life…
(whistle)

Come on guys, cheer up!

Always look on the bright side of life…
Always look on the bright side of life…

Worse things happen at sea you know!

Always look on the bright side of life…

I mean, what have you got to lose?
You know, you come from nothing, you’re going back to nothing
What have you lost? Nothing!

Always look on the right side of life…

I have an mp3 of this song if anyone wants it. Just IM me, ask for it, and you shall receive. Just know that it's not the exact version from Monty Python's Life of Brian, but it sounds just about the same. And Eric Idle still sings it, so whatever lol.
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Tuesday, December 7, 2004

Don't call your dog Lifesaver. Call him Shithead!
I went on my last embargo to the dentist earlier today. I got X-Rays taken, and apparently I had a small cavity, so I got a filling for that. My teeth just really, really suck right now, I guess. After that, I got my teeth cleaned. Nothing much to say about that, except that the stuff they use to clean teeth tastes awful. I hope I'm not the only person in the world that despises mint in all of its disgusting forms.

Also, my siblings and I put up the ol' Christmas tree today. We've had the same fake tree for about 14 years now...it looks funny, because a lot of the branches and crap are bent everywhere. Also, we don't have enough lights to go around the whole tree, we have way too many ornaments, and I swear that the version of "Frosty the Snowman" that plays on the little music box that we have sounds like the Indiana Jones theme.

Hah, I love our tree. Screw having some pretentious, picture-perfect Christmas, I like this a lot better. Fits in better with my family, since we're all more than a bit off-kilter.

And now...

First article can be read here.

Bad joke gets better for police

Through violence? Violence makes everything better.

A man walked into a La Vista gas station Sunday and joked that he had a gun - but what happened next left the police laughing.

"So he pulls out the gun and kills a bunch of people! Isn't that hysterical?"

La Vista Police Chief Bob Lausten said the man, 22, entered the Sinclair gas station at 84th Street and Park View Boulevard about 6:15 p.m.

"Apparently he wanted some Cheetos, a six-pack and the latest issue of Penthouse, and he was going to get them by any means necessary."

The man's joke didn't alarm the clerk. She was his mother. However, another customer was alarmed. He called police.

Meanwhile, article get boring, resort to dry sentences and Tarzan grammar. Writer get lazy. Scratch ass many time.

Officers sped to the scene and found the suspected robber and a friend outside their car in the station parking lot.

GET IT IT'S FUNNY!!!!!

Officers detected the smell of marijuana coming from the car. A search turned up a quarter pound of marijuana and $603. The men were arrested for drug possession.

"Looks like we found a quarter-pounder in your car...a quarter-pounder of POT, that is!"

"Haha, good one, chief."

"I know, Lou. I know."

Jailed in Sarpy County, the two men, both on parole, realized a conviction would land them back in prison.

"Dude, if we get convicted for a crime, we could go to JAIL!"

"Whoa O_O ...is there pot in prison?"

So they used a jail telephone to call a girlfriend and persuaded her to claim the marijuana was hers. She had no criminal record, and the men assured her she would, at most, stay in jail overnight.

She had no criminal record...yet! *Dragnet music*

The woman went to the police station and told her tale. Police knew immediately the story was false because inmate phone calls are recorded at the Sarpy County Jail.

"Sometimes the inmates cry when they call people, and we like to laugh at them. ...oh yeah, you're busted for lying about being busted for pot possession!"

She was arrested for false reporting.

---

Next article can be read here.

Teenagers fail to see the consequences

And this is a surprise...how?

Juveniles may find it harder than adults to foresee the consequences of their actions. The finding may explain why teenagers act compulsively and take more risks. It has been seized on by campaigners who want to ban the death penalty for under-18s in the US.

Dude, I can tell you why right now: We're all fucking stupid. Just like the rest of the world.

We know teenagers can be a bit gawky while they are still learning to coordinate their bodies, says Abigail Baird, a cognitive scientist from Dartmouth College in Hanover, New Hampshire, US. “We mustn’t forget that cognition is doing the same.” Teenagers take more risks, because they do not foresee the consequences as adults do, she says.

becuz we all kno dat adultz alwayz fors33 da consquencesfsz LOLZ1!111!!111111!

Several bodies, including the American Medical Association and American Psychiatric Association, have submitted evidence in a test case before the US Supreme Court arguing against the death penalty for juveniles, and including some of Baird’s ideas. While 31 states ban the execution of juvenile offenders, 23 under-18s have been executed to date, more than half of them in Texas.

More than half in Texas. No surprise there.

The test case concerns Christopher Simmons, who was sentenced to death for a murder he committed when he was 17. In August 2003, the Missouri Supreme Court overturned his sentence on the grounds that it violated the Eighth Amendment’s ban on cruel and unusual punishment. In July 2004, Simmons’s lawyers asked the US Supreme Court to uphold the lower court’s decision.

Reason: "I'm too young to die! ...oh, and I'm a stupid teenager."

In Baird’s experiment, carried out with colleague Jonathan Fugelsang, teenagers and adults were shown scenarios on a computer screen, such as eating a salad or swimming with sharks. The subjects had to judge whether each was safe or dangerous. Both groups took longer to decide a scenario was dangerous, but this difference was greater in teenagers. Adults took 1.6 seconds longer to reach a decision while teenagers took 1.75 seconds more.

Adult: *chooses shark*

Teenager: Um... *Jeopardy music plays* O_O! *panics and chooses the salad* ...

Brain scans taken during the test show that the prefrontal cortex was more active in the teens, suggesting they were making a greater effort to judge the results of each situation. The adults had more basal ganglia activity, pointing to a more automatic response, Baird told a meeting on Law and the Brain at the Institute of Advanced Legal studies, part of University College London, UK, this week.

Teenager: I know sharks eat people and stuff...but salads taste kind of funky. Though they do provide all of the sustenance that I need for my one-meal-50-calorie-a-day diet.

In light of Baird’s studies, US district judge Morris Hoffman from Colorado described two cases he had presided over involving a 16 and a 17-year-old, both had received mandatory life sentences for killing with no opportunity for parole. “I ask myself, should our responses have been different?” he says, “I’m embarrassed to say that I’m not sure I know.”

Hah! Apparently your basal ganglia isn't active enough! OWNED!

Although the Simmons case specifically addresses under-18s, Baird says there is a grey area in the late teens to early 20s. There can be big disagreements about how mature, say, an 18 to 21-year-old is. “There is no way to know where a kid falls on this chart,” she says.

"But for purposes of this article, we'll generalize and call the whole lot of them idiots."

---

Last article can be read here.

'Master/slave' Most Politically Incorrect Phrase

...I can already tell that I will hate this article.

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - The computer term "master/slave," which was banned as racially offensive by a Los Angeles County purchasing department, was named the most politically incorrect term of the year on Thursday.

Oh lord. This is the single dumbest sentence I've read in weeks, and this is including that gibberish l337 sentence I typed about in the previous article. "We don't know what it means, but we'll ban it because it sounds racially insensitive!" As a person of color, myself, I'd like to send you an invitation to shut the fuck up.

Among other terms on the top 10 list of politically charged words and phrases, issued by the word usage group Global Language Monitor, were "non-same sex marriage" to describe heterosexual unions, "waitron" for waiter or waitress and "higher being" for God, a term some people found too religious.

.................................

"Non-same sex marriage"? Jesus Christ, that's actually dumber than the "master/slave" bullcrap. "Waitron"? That's actually even dumber than that! And "higher being" is, dare I say, religious?! Can I get a nice, big "No shit, Sherlock" for these buffoons?

God, I'm all for being politically correct when it's necessary, but this crap is just asinine.

"We found 'master/slave' to be the most egregious example of political correctness in 2004," said Paul JJ Payack, president of The Global Language Monitor.

Translation: It's fucking stupid, yo.

"This is but one more example of the insertion of politics into every facet of modern life, down to the level of the control processes of computer technology."

Dear Politically Correct phrases: plz die k thx bai

In computer terminology, "master/slave" refers to primary and secondary hard disk drives. But a Los Angeles county purchasing department told vendors in late 2003 that the term was offensive and violated the region's cultural diversity. The county's department of affirmative action undertook a hunt to replace it on packages.

"Let's turn it into something happy, like, "Leader/Partner"!"

"God, you're an idiot."

After a public uproar, the county backed down. Payack said that while the incident took place in late 2003, debate about it grew enormously in 2004.

LET IT DIE.

The phrase "non-same sex marriage," was used by a former congressman who did not want to offend gay people by using the term traditional marriage, Payack said.

Believe me, you're offending them more by making a weak attempt at pandering to them, and insulting their intelligence with this PC bullshit.

Also on the list this year were "Red Sox lover," to use in place of "Yankee hater," "progressive" for classical liberal, "incurious" rather than more impolite invectives for President Bush, "insurgents" instead of terrorists in Iraq, "baristas" for waiters, and "first year student" rather than freshman.

*murders all politically correct phrasing* Ugh. Politically correct phrases are among the absolute worst things that mankind has ever thought up. EVER. They offend me more than "politically incorrect" phrases, because PC stuff is always so god damned stupid.
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Monday, December 6, 2004

Are gringos falling from the sky?
I was visiting a message board earlier today, and as it often does, a top ten favorite movies thread popped up today. I like reading other people's opinions on movies, because it clues me in on movies that I'd like to see for myself someday. I've gone out of my way to see various movies because of this, and I'd like to think that just maybe someone will see the movies that I put down and think "Hey, I was planning on watching that sometime" and then go out and do it.

My list always changes as I watch new movies, but one movie that usually hangs around on my top ten favorites list is Three Amigos. For the uninitiated, Three Amigos is a comedy starring Steve Martin, Chevy Chase and Martin Short. If that doesn't already tell you how good it is, well, I don't know what else I can tell you.

The movie basically revolves around Dusty Bottoms (Chevy Chase), Lucky Day (Steve Martin) and Ned Nederlander (Martin Short), three silent film stars who starred in a series of old west films. A woman whose village is being repressed and pillaged by a gang led by the nefarious El Guapo sees one of their films, and assumes that they really are kickass cowboys who will be able to beat the living crap out of El Guapo and his gang of crazies.

So, she sends them a telegram. The three guys have just been fired from their previous jobs when they get the telegram. They mistakenly think that it's just another movie, so they accept the job and head on over to the village. Everything snowballs from there, and it's quite funny. The movie is rife with really great sight gags (I still get a nice laugh from the invisible swordsman), and the dialogue is pretty funny, too. Three Amigos is easily one of my favorite comedies, and is definitely Shinmaru recommended entertainment.

For those curious about my whole list thingy:

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back
Monty Python's Life of Brian
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
Blazing Saddles
Three Amigos!
Young Frankenstein
American Beauty
Taxi Driver
Psycho

EDIT: More movies that rule (i.e. Shinmaru felt guilty confining his list to just ten)! Pulp Fiction, The Jerk, Bowfinger, Rear Window, The Birds, Star Wars: A New Hope, Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, Caddyshack, Dogma, The Indiana Jones trilogy (even though Raiders and Last Crusade are way better than Temple of Doom, in my opinion), A Clockwork Orange, The Shining, Ghostbusters, This Is Spinal Tap, Pee-wee's Big Adventure, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory...and I'll stop here. There are literally thousands upon thousands of great movies, though. Movies are so great. I could probably never see enough of them in my lifetime.

My list always changes, though. It'll probably be different even next week or something. What are some of your favorite movies? I'd like to hear some opinions.

Today, I didn't really do that much. Studied a bit for my U.S. History final. That shall receive an intellectual beating, along with my Communications final. Studying is obscenely boring, so I shall move on right now.

After that, I played trivia games for a while with the ol' family. Trivia is always fun. I whipped up on my dad and my brother on our movie trivia game, and my mom barely squeaked by me when we all played Saturday Night Live Trivial Pursuit. I got a bunch of hard questions whenever it was my turn to win the game :( And then my mom gets this weak ass "Which cast member got fired in 2002, and was re-hired in 2003?" question. I knew it right away, why didn't I get that question? >:O

It's Chris Parnell, by the way.

Then my brother and I played Smash Bros. for a while. Apparently my sister has a few friends coming over here on Friday who want to play my brother and I at Smash Bros. We'll probably get beat up on really good, because we haven't played Smash Bros. in months. After beating the crap out of each other, like usual, my brother and I teamed up against a couple of Level 9 computer players, and got our asses stomped into the ground. We're not very good at team play lol.

The best part was when the match degenerated into insane ramblings. Stuff like: "I'd give my soul for another life!!", "*just after getting up after getting a severe ass whipping from the computer players* MEIN FUHRER, I CAN WALK!" and "We can't win if you keep killing me, stop killing me, or I'll kill you back!" Well, those were the understandable lines, anyway. Everything else was just gibberish and nonsense. My brother was choked up in laughter after I went on a wild, gibberishy rant in the middle of the match after he accidentally threw a bomb at me.

Ah, good times, good times. Now I remember why I liked Smash Bros. so much.

Lastly, I finished the first part of the short story I'm currently working on. You can find the thread here: Dream, Dream, Dream [PG - VL]. Comments, critique, and whatever else you would care to throw at me would be very much appreciated.

Now, if you'll excuse me, there is more coked-up rambling to be had! Woosh!

EDIT: Hah, I forgot, this is usually my Shinmaru vs. The World night. Ah well, I'll do that tomorrow, promise.
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Sunday, December 5, 2004

U-G-L-Y
Ah, I'm a bit tired right now. Went out and had fun, though, that's the important thing.

Woke up at about the same time I do every morning, but I stayed in bed for an extra twenty minutes. Getting up every morning has been tougher since I started college. I guess it's some sort of side effect that comes along with the whole package.

My dad and I left at about 8:00 AM. It didn't take very long to get to Pasadena, but it took forever to park at the Rose Bowl, since the parking area was so horribly set up, as per usual with the Rose Bowl. All of the markers and road blocks seemed to be thrown on the street at random. The whole thing was really confusing, and more than a few people got lost trying to figure the damn thing out.

Eventally we got parked, and were sandwiched in between a bunch of cars. That was when my dad and I knew that it would be a long while until we'd be getting out of the parking lot after the game was over.

We had a few hours to spare (the game wasn't set to start until about 1:30 PM), so we listened to the radio and I studied a bit with my Communications book. After my professor gave me our study guide, I was like "I have to remember all of this? o_o", but I actually found that I did remember most of the information we're supposed to know. That Final is in for a severe intellectual beating.

Later on, I had to go to the bathroom. The bathrooms around the parking lot were tiny buildings with about one or two toilets per room, which led to some rather long lines. I waited about twenty minutes or so for the opportunity to use the restroom, and I actually had it pretty easy. After I was done, the line was longer than when I had gotten into it, and the line for the ladies room was even longer than that!

I guess everyone had to use the restroom at once. Or maybe all of the women had to powder their noses at once. *dodges various items that are thrown in his direction*

When it got close to game time, my dad and I walked over to the actual Rose Bowl, which was about a twenty minute walk from where we were parked. Yeah, we left about five and a half hours before the game was slated to start, and we still got terrible parking. That's college sports for you. After more waiting in line at the front gate (there's another prominent theme in attending college sports, long lines), my dad and I got inside, walked about halfway around the Rose Bowl until we got to our section, and climbed about a million steps to our seats. I think I saw a couple of Sherpas on the way up, but don't quote me on that.

Another thing that I hate about the Rose Bowl, and that I mentioned yesterday, I think, is the seating. Basically, most of the stadium seating is comprised of nothing but long, silver benches. They're extremely uncomfortable to sit on, and people tend to pack in against each other when sitting on them, so that you barely have any room at all when you're sitting. The seating at the Coliseum (where USC plays their home games) isn't exactly Camelot material, either, but at least they're actual seats and you have room to move around there.

Yet another staple of college sports is the annoying, loudmouthed sports fan. You're likely to find one (or, god forbid, a group of them) at any even you go to, and they are amazingly annoying. And, of course, I had one of those guys sitting right behind me during the game. The fact that he was a USC fan didn't absolve him from his innately annoying nature, either, he still bugged the hell out of me.

Mostly he just yelled stuff like "Goddammit!" and "Fuck!" whenever any insignificant play went on during the game that he disagreed with. Also, I'm fairly certain that the volume control on his voice didn't have anything lower than 'Attention Whore'. And, for whatever reason, he shook my shoulders when some big plays happened. Yes, sir, I'm happy that USC scored a touchdown (don't you see me cheering?), now please stop attempting to molest me.

Halftime was just...bleh. I was pretty hungry by then, so I went out to get something to eat. By the time I even got through the stupid tunnel leading out of or section, halftime was already about halfway over. The line to get food was also quite long, of course. If I haven't drilled it into your head by now, COLLEGE SPORTING EVENTS HAVE LONG ASS LINES!

I made it back to my seat maybe a quarter into the third quarter, when I sensed that something that I had been missing for the past hour and a half or so was upon me. Wondering what this could possibly be, I sat down, and the guy behind me starting yelling and hollering again.

Ah, yes, I had been missing a bit of calm. Nice of that guy to get rid of it all for me, eh?

Despite these complaints, though, I really did have a great time at the game. It was incredibly close the whole way through, which made the game that much more exciting. In the end, USC won 29-24, in what was probably the best game I've ever been to live (sans last year's Rose Bowl between USC and Michigan, anyway). I had a pretty fun day.

But, now, I'd like to rest up a bit, and tomorrow I can go back to my daily schedule of doing absolutely nothing :)
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Saturday, December 4, 2004

He's the most...sucking scum I've ever seen.
First day off. I barely got any studying done today, but it wasn't my intent to study today, anyway. I've got plenty of time in the upcoming days to get to that. Today I just wanted to relax and not think about school at all.

I played Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga today. The first time I started playing it, I didn't get very far, and ended up not playing it for a while. I'm about seven and a half hours in right now. The game is pretty fun, though I'll have to wait until I'm finished to make any comparisons with Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door.

So far it compares pretty favorably, though. I think that Paper Mario is just a smidgen funnier than Mario & Luigi, and I like both of their battle systems about the same, though Mario & Luigi's is a bit deeper. Mario & Luigi is also tougher, so far. Some of the enemies can stomp you pretty good if you're not careful, and all of the bosses I've faced so far have presented a formidable challenge. I didn't really get that in Paper Mario until a bit later on in the game.

So, yeah, Mario & Luigi is a pretty kickass little game so far, not that I expected any different. I'd heard tons of positive remarks about the game before my brother received it as an early birthday gift a while ago. The game has definitely lived up to the hype, thus far.

I've been working on the first part of the story, too, and I'm almost finished with it, though I don't know if I'll be able to get it posted tonight, or even tomorrow morning. It's coming along nicely, however, just about the way I envisioned it in my head. I think that I'll give this one more than a few once-overs before I post it, too, just to make sure I wrote everything down exactly the way that I want it. I've found that I'm a tad lazy when it comes to proofing my work, and I want to get away from that a bit.

I just finished watching Taxi Driver right now. I'd seen it once before, but I wasn't able to concentrate during the movie because it was on late, and I was pretty tired throughout the whole thing. In fact, I don't even remembering seeing the ending the first time. But I watched it the whole way through tonight. It's a great, great movie.

The experience was kind of hindered when my satellite decided to give out on me near the ending, though. It froze a bit near the climax of the movie, and I was like "No! What happened to Travis?!" (Travis is the name of the main character in the movie, by the way) Luckily, I was able to fix it up, and at least see the ending of the movie, which was nice, even though I missed the rest of the climax. Oh well, Taxi Driver is actually shown surprisingly frequently, so I'm sure that I'll be able to catch it again sometime.

Lastly, I'll be gone a lot of the day tomorrow, because I'll be going to the USC/UCLA game at the Rose Bowl in Pasadena with my dad, tomorrow. Should be a lot of fun, even though I loathe the seating at the Rose Bowl. Everyone's always packed in so tight there, it's like you're in a tin of sardines there. But whatever, the actual game itself should be a lot of fun. USC and UCLA are big rivals, so both teams should bring their all in the game, lest either of them be made out to be ultra-pansies or something.

Anyway, I'm tired, and I'll have to leave early tomorrow, so I'll be heading off now. Looks like I won't be putting up the story tonight after all. Oh well, there's always tomorrow, right?
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Friday, December 3, 2004

Throw it on some hobo with dry elbows.
Communications was fun, and really, really short today. Basically, the last few people were doing their presentations (like how I did my Excel Saga presentation like two months ago), and someone did one on Harvey Birdman. That was awesome. A few girls near me didn't really get the show, I guess, because they were staring at it like "WTF? O_o" It was pretty funny. The clip shown was from the episode where Fred Flintstone is a mafioso ala Tony Soprano from The Sopranos.

Ah, Harvey Birdman, you skewer Hanna Barbera so well. What would we do without you? Wither and die, I'd expect.

After that, we got a study guide and went over it for a while, and then we left. We had class for maybe an hour, even though classes on Tuesday and Thursday usually run a couple of hours. I wasn't complaining, though, because I needed to finish reading a book for History.

And finish it, I did! It's a good book, Rumor of War by Philip Caputo. It's basically about Caputo's experience in Vietnam. It's insane to think of all the craziness that these young guys see and participate in when they're in wars. Hell, Caputo was about my age or a bit older when he first enlisted to go to Vietnam. I dunno, I just find that a bit wild.

But anyway.

I get to History class after finishing off the rest of the book, and then I turn in my essay. Whatever, I'm glad to finally be rid of that evil bastard. We finished off a movie about Vietnam that we'd been watching the day before, and that we have to write a one page journal thingy on. No big deal. And then we take a test on the Caputo book...a supposedly big test that ends up only one question long that could be answered in three lines.

I hate when teachers puff up tests. I wasn't exactly nervous about it or anything, but I'm just annoyed that I took the time to read the entire book very carefully only to get a one-question test. Eh, guess I shouldn't be complaining, easy points after all. But, yeah, I just found it a bit annoying. It's not as bad as having a bajillion multiple-choice questions, though. Multiple choice tests I can't stand, because they always pick out stupid, irrelevant facts most of the time. Stuff like:

What did this one guy do here?

a) He laughed!
b) He cried!
c) LOLZ!11
d) THIS QUESTION SUCKS YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED BLASPHEMER
e) THERE IS NO E

Give me a good in-class essay any day of the week. Maybe I'm crazy, but I like those things. The time limit only makes it better. Will I be able to finish it on time? Suck on it, I finished it five minutes early, bitch! Good times, good times. That was one of the few good things about my Senior year in high school, we had no take home essays, and all in-class essays. It fucking ruled.

Anyway...I'm writing something right now, a short story. It shall be three parts, mostly because I think it'll end up being too lengthy to post all at once when I'm finished with it. Maybe about 20-30 pages. That's good on paper, not good online. Apparently people don't read long stuff!! Sad, yet true, so I shall split it up.

...well, I will eventually. I'm not even finished with the first part yet, so yeah :P

However, I do have enough done to post a short preview. Usually I just post stuff and say 'GO READ OR I SMASH' but I figured that a bit of a preview to get people salivating (through hatred or love, I do not know) would be a nice change of pace. So, yeah, here we go. Note that this will be the only part of the story with a deliberately humorous tone, though the second part might end up being funny. Depends on how I decide to write it, really.

It was high noon on a hot, bright day. The town was empty; everyone was either in the saloon or shut up in their homes. The hot, harsh wind whipped against my tanned, unshaven face as I galloped into town on horseback. I gripped the reins tightly, bobbing up and down on the saddle to keep my balance. My horse rode into town, and I pulled back on the reins, telling it to slow down. The horse slowed down, rearing up into the air as it stopped. I turned over to the side, and attempted to jump off gracefully, but the spur of my left boot got caught in the leather saddle and I fell face first onto the ground. As I pushed myself up off of the ground, spitting dust, sand and dirt out of my mouth, only one thought crossed my mind:

I knew I should’ve worn that bandana over my mouth today.

Before I knew it, I was being dragged off by the horse; apparently, my spur was still caught in the saddle. I hopped on one foot as the horse trotted around, and I smacked its behind repeatedly with my gloved fist.

“Damn you, horse!” I yelled. “Slow down, my foot’s caught in the saddle!” I pulled and tugged on the spur, and pried it loose from the saddle. The resulting momentum sent me sprawling to the ground. I got up quickly and dusted myself off. My blue jeans and shirt were most covered in dirt, but not so much that I could smack it all off with my hands. I was glad, and lucky, that the guns in my side holsters had not gone off. Over the past couple of weeks, I’d had a few accidents concerning those. I was still wondering how the sheep were doing.

I ran my hand quickly through my thick, brown hair, and then removed it just as quickly when I realized that my hand was still covered in dust. I looked around and was relieved to see that nobody had seen my gaffe. I spotted the saloon, and decided that a nice drink would do me nicely, especially since it was so hot. I walked over to the wooden walkway leading up to the saloon, and stepped onto it. As I sauntered over to the saloon, I could hear my spurs digging into the wood with each step. Chink chunk, chink chunk, chink chunk.

And then I stopped. Chink chunk, chink chunk, chink chunk? I knew that didn’t sound right. I looked down at my boots, and noticed that the spur of my right boot was missing. I grumbled to myself and backtracked a bit towards the entrance of the walkway. There, in the middle of the dirt and dust, I spotted my spur. As I made my way towards it, however, the wind kicked up a bit and blasted some dirt into my eyes.

“Son of a bitch!” I yelled, rubbing at my eyes. Stinging tears flowed from my eyes as they attempted to wash away all traces of the dirt that had flown into my face. I rubbed the last bit of dirt away from my eyes and squinted down at my spur. Actually, I glanced down at where I thought the spur was, as the spur was not there, anymore. A short gust of wind kicked up a small mass of dirt, and a tumbleweed rolled slowly across the pathway. I took a deep breath, calmed myself down, got on my hands and knees and began feeling around for my spur.

“Ow!” After a few moments of searching, I found my spur. I sucked tenderly on my index finger, which had been poked by the spur’s razor-like points, and then I spit it out after I realized that it had been rummaging through the dirt for the past five minutes. I took my spur and twisted it back onto my boot, good as new, if a bit dirty. I stood up and wiped the sweat from my brow. Just about everything that could have gone wrong, did go wrong, and it was more than a bit annoying.

See, just a little bit. I'll probably go back and edit it later, to make it flow a bit better. Oh, and if you liked this, I'm sure you'll love the end of it. What I have planned for that is about a million times better than this, and that ain't no crap. I shall have lots of fun writing that, you can be sure of that ^_~
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