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Tuesday, December 14, 2004

...I don't deserve to die. (Warning if you are offended by profanity don't read this)
Okay, yesterday Kitsune, Mel and I went to the dance, I mean if bad things always happen why do we go, but me and mel were told to run, by the creepy lunatic...he's awesome though, and ofcourse me being a complete and utter fucking asshole and moron, I didn't realized that Kitsune was there, so the dance sucked, and I hate myself and I'm a mute currently, so fuck this shit I should have to live through this crap, and you know what, I deserve anything I get, except death...no I'm not good enough for that, and cheesesticks and pickles give me bad dreams, cause I was upset in my room eating those things, while cutting my hands with scissors. Man I suck. So bluntly I can't commit suicide even if I wanted to. So, I guess I'll be leaving for a phijilion years. Damn. Man, I have cheese sticks. But the good thing about today, is I had McDonalds for breakfast, and I get to see the lights tonight. And Kitsune, if you read this I'm really really sorry,and uhm...if you ever want to speak to me again then uh come to see the lights with me. But I won't blame you if you don't ver want to talk to me again, because I am such a screw up.
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Monday, December 13, 2004

   Well then....
By an odd turn of events I have realized I don't need suicide at all. I mean I can feel the pain, and I have amusement in cutting my hands but why die when I am so young and get Kuushou after me and to hurt the people around me, but so with that I have stated I will not commit suicide for atleast a year.
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Thursday, December 9, 2004

you are... bi-polar

What type of Depression do you have? (MANY different outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla

It sounds like you are going through a major
depressive episode. If you have answered the
questions honestly and have received this
depression can hit anyone at any time, and is
agony. The person suddenly feels utterly
hopeless, worthless and life seems too painful
and ugly to bear. No one seems to understand,
and it can feel impossible to manage even the
simplest of tasks. You feel exhausted all the
time, and often cannot sleep and do not want to
eat. It can last for several months, and will
usually lift spontaneously. However, you cannot
afford to 'wait it out' - people who are
suffering a major depressive episode are often
at very high risk for suicide - especially
tragic given that the depression almost always
lifts, and responds very well and quite fast to
antidepressants. It is a medical condition, and
needs a medical solution - the depressed mind
is not functioning properly and thought
patterns become rigid and limited - often
suicide seems like the only option. The
overwhelming majority of people who have
attempted suicide during a major depressive
episode are incredibly relieved that they did
not succeed, and will recover to mental
wellbeing. Please, please go and get help now
- you can get out of this and back into life
far more easily than you think. Remember, this
is just an amateur quiz, NOT a replacement for
real medical advice. Go to your GP as soon as
you can.

Are you depressed? A serious depression test.
brought to you by Quizilla

You are in a mild depression. You have had a loved
one die or your boss yell at you and have had a
hard time. You manage to get through most of it
hanging out with your one friend. It's horrible
being depressed, but you'll get over it in

How serious is your depression?
brought to you by Quizilla

CUTTING - You're going to commit suicide by cutting
your wrists. You'll use a scalpel or a
razorblade or a knife. You want to see blood,
while keeping your suicide silent...while
you're locked in your room with your weapon of
choice. Just remember...cut down not across,
you want to hit the vein!

How will you commit suicide??
brought to you by Quizilla

Death by hanging, I guess you think this is the way
to die...hmmm...just make sure you do it so
your neck snaps when you fall otherwise you'll
be in for a long wait...

How will you committ suicide?
brought to you by Quizilla


What's Your Method Of Suicide?
brought to you by Quizilla

Death by: Self inflicted gunshot. Seems like
you're just building up to much on the inside,
and it's fixing to all come bursting
out...literally. Chill out a bit... blood
spatter is a real mess to clean up.

How will you commit suicide? (images)
brought to you by Quizilla

You're not a very positive person...doubt you'll
make it long

What is your likelyhood to commit suicide at a future time?
brought to you by Quizilla

You would drown yourself. wether in a pool, or the
tub.. in water, or in vodka. You hate life. You
hate people. You hate living. You are shy,
artistic, and "helpless". All your
emotions, and anger have been built up inside
you. And you've finally snapped. You like the
thought of death. And admire people who kill

How would you commit suicide?
brought to you by Quizilla

See how much people have missed in my miserable life.

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   Sorry about that...
Yes, I was quite content yesterday but disturbed in a sense so, yeah. i am depressed, so I got yen from Mr. MacDonald. Oh yeah Kitsune if you aren't home one more time I will kill you!
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Wednesday, December 8, 2004

   yeah...this is sort of big...and bugging me...
Okay first I'd like to ask a few questions.

1. do people usually think of suicide on a daily basis?

2. Why do most suicidal people act like their okay?

3. Why does anyone act?

4. Why don't people say whats on their mind if its troubling them

and finally...

5. What is the biggest way you could think of commiting suicide?

I was thinking about this last night while contemplating suicide in my closet with Bad religion cranked in the background, my dark cold closet (I'm serious it's cold! Probably because I have a fan in there.)

So I left my room searching for a small shiny knife right, a small one. I couldn't find it, so yeah. I didn't commit suicide, I couldn't find the knife, but hey atleast today's alot better! My science teacher gave me some yen!

But yeah, if anyone wants to express there sorrows knows thetime I'm listening, and I'm not going to pretend this didn't happen and I'm not ging to pretend it did, but I had to get that off my chest...^_^ *sigh*

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Tuesday, December 7, 2004

   Oh everyone we have to go to Japan...
We have to get married! Even if only a day... But 156 visits! wow that is more than I expected
Comments (0) | Permalink

   I took a quiz yesterday...
And I was going to post my result right...Kitsune would've liked my result...but it froze! So I didn't get to post that I Was Kyo's Pins!
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Wednesday, December 1, 2004

I haven't posted in a while...but hey everyone!
I am here to say I have a section called the Luc tales!
Comments (2) | Permalink

I haven't posted in a while...but hey everyone!
I am here to say I have a section called the Luc tales!
Comments (0) | Permalink

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Hey warning from the people that I know and me.
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