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Sunday, July 30, 2006

   camp continued... the mud massacre
sorry that i didn't add yesterday, i was grounded. but now i'm back!

anyway! back to the subject, there were thousands of awesome games!!! which all involved getting wet, well most of them anyway. one of them involved mud. and the mud was in a swampish area. it was about 75% some sorta poo and 25% actual mud. now, how many of you know what/who monk is? well for those of you who know what/who that is, you know how he is about everything, especially germs, it seems that i'm that way about swamp mud.

so i'm like to my counselor "there is no way that i'm going in there. you know the show monk? i'm like that about this kinda mud." but the other one tells me that if she's going in then i can to. so we get into the mud. you know the kind of mud that your feet sink down into? that's the kinda mud we were in, now both my scream and hurl meters were pretty full, about half way. then they tell us, that we have to play leap frog in this smelly, malaria infested mud. so we do. now my scream and hurl meters are really close to breaching. i'm suppressing my screams of horror. so we get done. can anyone guess what happens next? they announce MUD FIGHT!!! the team to get the dirtiest wins. so i grab a handful of mud, i'm so close to screaming, and hurl it (not puke it) at somebody. then i start to get plastered with mud. and i don't know who this s.o.b. was but they land a hit of mud smack on my face. i now have mud on my face and in my mouth. i'm gonna quote mike on this.

"You know when you're stomach tells your brain, 'brain this is stomach. we're gonna hurl in about 15 seconds.' and your brain is like ' no! we're gonna get up and go to the bathroom and hurl like a decent person.' so your brain pages the legs. 'legs get us outta here!' and your legs are like 'ain't gonna happen.' stomach starts to count down '10, 9, 8, ..."

that's how i was feeling. my body was even beginning to gag *i know tmi* so another counselor comes over to me and asks the most stupid question in the world, "are you all right?"

HELLO!!!! i'm standing here making gagging noises with my mouth! my body is as taught as a bowstring! and people around me are throwing mud, and continuing to plaster me with said mud!!! and my answer, i can't even answer. cause my stomach is like talk and we're giving all the contents of your breakfast to show the whole world!

so i shake my head.

and bless her heart, she pulls me outta the mud and takes me to firm ground and says again, "Colleen are you okay."

all i can manage to get out without the chance of hurling is "get... this... mud... offa... my... mouth...!" and bless her god, she takes off her shirt (we're all plastered in mud and everyone has their bathing suits on under their clothes except for me cause i'm a total idiot) and wipes off my mouth with a clean part of her shirt. i look at her pleadingly. i'm soaked with water from before and am plastered with dirt. i manage to get out the word "shower" and she takes me up to them.

and here is what i hated about that place, everything was about half of a mile away from one another. the lake was 1/2 a mile away from the cabins, the mess hall, and of course the showers. i'm in soaking wet jeans, and t-shirt, and those get heavy for those of you who haven't tried it to walk in. so finally i get half way to the showers, and i tell the counselor, "Jolica, i need to get a towel and soap." in my mind i add lots and lots of soap. and she lets me go to the cabin and get some. mind you i was covered in half dried mud. my hair was in french braids so it wasn't damaged enough for me to take them out. so i just take my shower, and i come out and see jolica. the words that come out of my mouth were "it's never felt so good to be clean." and to tell you the truth, during the entire time i was covered in that muck, i was thinking about the episode of monk, where he was taken to the cleanest room on earth. i kept thinking how nice it would've been to be in there.

well that's all the time i got for this post. if i think of anything else that's really exciting, i'll typr more. laundry awaits.

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