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Monday, May 30, 2005


...and the blood stains...they never go away

Piece of mind

A few days ago, after coming home from taking pictures all day, I was so tired I went to sleep all day. My parents woke me up later for me to shower and eat so I did. Then around one in the morning my mom told me to go to sleep so I went to sleep in my room. Then, around 1:30 I was awaken by the sound of a bag. It sounded like someone was in my room, but I knew no one was (I have this kind of feeling, where I can feel if there are people in the room, and I can close my eyes and still know how many. I think it's an energy reading?). I being the lazy bum (haha never gets old) that I am, went back to sleep, only to be awaken nijigoro. This time, it felt like someone was stroking my hair. I was so scared I turned on the lights, but nobody was there. Then I disregarded the whole thing, telling myself that I was just tired from working too much, so I went back to sleep, then it happened again, so I grabbed my blankets and everything and went into the living room but not downstairs cause I was too scared (I'm still upstairs, my house is asian, so I have one upstairs and down). Outside, I was able to sleep at approximately 3:00. Then I dreamt the dream

~Dream~
I wake up in my mom's room covered in blood, because my two front teeth came out. I'm in pain, and shock at the same time. There is so much blood everywhere, and I'm crying. In an attempt to put my teeth back in, I run to the bathroom. I turn on the faucet and look in the mirror, only everything behind me is black, and so I turn around and see a trail of blood, and I just screamed, then I woke up. The dream only took 10mins, but it felt as if It's been hours.
~end~

The dream may seem like nothing, but it involves an asian myth/superstition. You see, your two front teeth on the top belong to your parents, and if you dream that it comes out, it represents death. I've been debating for a while, whether to tell my parents, but I'm saying this now because I told them. I just didn't want to burden them. To dream something like this is extremely bad. It's happening again. Last time something like this happened, I dreamt that my grandfather and I were walking (he loved to walk) and he told me that he was moving to a better place. A few days later, he passed away. I just don't know what to think now. It's the Ace...the one that was behind me in my fortune asapin...the one we saw and were wondering about. The one we thought already happened...
I really hope that me trying to put my teeth back in means something maybe nothing will happen...maybe their boon mai toong...then that just makes it all worse ;_;

could it be that the hand I felt was for a reason? Did someone visit me? I miss my grandpa...


...and the blood stains...they never go away
at this point, anything's possible

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Sunday, May 29, 2005


   A picture's worth a thousand words

Piece of mind

Although it's a children's story, I still like it V^^V

~Beginning of Story~

ꨪ󪬡 ̸ݾު
Ϫ ƪ롣

ު ੪ˡ ᪤ǡ ު

ꨪ󪬡 Ҫު ⪢ު
ުê몬 ƪު

ժϪު
êݪߪ Ǫު

~The End~


This is ME AHAHAHA



Except I'm not that perverted...I promise

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I'm much better now ^^


I kept thinking about how we were supposed to test out the microphones for awards night, but then they weren't ever working so we had to just speak out loud during the whole thing. Then for the after after review where we talk about what went wrong, people brought up the subject about the microphone XD...and what went well, is always the food.


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Look at what I found ^^
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I was deleting some extra photos my mom took and found some things I thought I should post


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This is my friend's dog. Because I like dogs, I wanted to hold it, but I wasn't allowed to until after we were done taking pictures. I couldn't help myself. Then when I got home, I had to clean all it's hair off my clothes. The only thing is, after a hard's day of work and...stuff...I usually like to come home and play games V^^V so my mom got mad cause I didn't shower until late...at least it's still white


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How are these pics? I'm still taking lots of pictures to fill up the photo album my auntie gave me.

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Saturday, May 28, 2005


Life is hard, and then you die

Piece of mind

"Member Since: 02/28/2005" Hey, that's today! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! I've been on Otaku for three months now V^^V


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Now it's a party...join me ^^


~Bonfire~

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My friends are hosting a bonfire today. It's a team thing. Although some of my friends are the host, my JV actually informed me about it. It wasn't until later that same day did my team member from my class told me about it. The rest just kind of kept quiet and never told me, or asked about it...if you don't want someone to go, don't invite that person...just don't say a word...somethings, aren't meant to be heard. I feel like I'm drifting further away from the team than before. They even took group pictures yesterday, without telling me. They didn't even call me over. I'm only in it because I happened to pass by and saw them. It's ok though, I'm ok cause I'd probably be too busy to go anyway...I'm not going to go, i don't think that they want me there cause some other people weren't invited too, although its a team thing...if i never heard what i heard, i'd probably go...some things, aren't meant to be heard.
"Cham manhi miwosso, Noui modunge oredoen sajin soge, Nar bomyo ugo son goun no phyojongdurkaji"...except mine isn't so broken...

It's alright, I have fun pretending to fight and just messing around with my the other members...members for something else (I do alot of other things)


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-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Friday, May 27, 2005


   *satirical laugh*

Piece of mind

Nice to know people don't like it when I'm depressed, but I have to admit that this is the first time I ever felt that way. The only real reason I felt depressed was just because of some personal issues. There's just so much going on. And yeah Asapin, I'd take care of my problems if I just found who some of the people were *cracks knuckles* I noticed that some people thought that I was depressed about being a senior. No, not at all, not me. As for the other part, I just miss my grandpa. I still remember it all...all the blood...the day...the time...the sun...the house...the spot...the dandelion...one wish...one blow...There's just some things that go on in my life that I don't let everyone know. But I guess it doesn't matter. I'd spill my life's story but I doubt anyone would listen.

Thank you red:leaf, listening to music did help, and the"i'll make you smile again I promise you" part.

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My grandpa was cool
*October 28, 1995*
He taught me some useful things

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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   IGNORANCE IS BLISS

Piece of mind

I don't know, but something about awards night just depressed me. I feel like I'm letting everyone down. It just hit me, like I don't know what, but it made me start to think about a lot of things, and it depresses me a lot. Maybe it's just because I'm a junior, soon to be a senior, but not quite one yet. I guess this is the reason I try to just work my life away. I don't even know when school's out because I absorb myself into my work. Then when I think about it, my grades aren't too satisfying to me. All that work, for nothing, or what feels like just nothing...IGNORANCE IS BLISS...if I just continue to keep my head down and work, I wouldn't have to deal with any of this...there is just simply too much going on, and I can't just tell anyone everything...



It's like being in a dark room at night. If i open my eyes and listen I'll constantly look around, listen, and be forever scared, but if I close my eyes and think of something, no matter what I'm safe...I miss my grandpa...
October 28, 1995...and the blood stains never go away

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Thursday, May 26, 2005


Awards Night

Piece of mind

In Asia school isn't out yet...It's only 1:14 in Korea, 11:14 in Thailand, 12:14 in Hong Kong, 1:15 in Tokyo...that's great, that means that if I fly west from Korea, I'll gain time...I'm sorry I do alot of travel thinking. It's just my grandmother is having a house made in Thailand, and I have to plan the trip to pay her a visit. I have to plan the amount of days etc. so that can schedule and manage my time.

Awards Night...it's in a little while. We're all going to wear white shirts, blue bottoms, and a red cord. This is where I officially give up my title ;_; ...I know for a fact that I'm going to miss it, but tradition is tradition...I should not show up to purposely keep it XD just kidding. I think JiJi also wants us to fix our hair so that we can take a lot of pictures, but when you're on stage it's an automatic thing where people rush up to take pictures of you and so you stand there and wait a while (it happened to me last year). I'll dress up, they seemed so worried cause I'm one of two who don't really "dress up" cause well I'm not too good with clothes, which I think explains why I always wear "hoodies" and surf shorts. Well I know that I'm receiving awards but I still feel excited because of...stuff...This is should be a memorable night...two down...june 11th to go V^^V I'm slowly getting there

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Wednesday, May 25, 2005


   3:00 in Korea

Piece of mind

...June 11th...DISNEYLAND...
Those two things are forever on my mind as of this moment

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All I want now...is to sleep...or at least relax


I was doing what I wanted to do more than anything else in the world: I was delving into why - peeling back the leaves of that grand old artichoke, human existence itself. At times the hunger to seize the very heart of it, to know, would clutch me so I would sit up 'til two, 'til three reading on and on. It was like penetrating the darkest continent of all...

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Tuesday, May 24, 2005


Piece of mind

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I don't know why but I'm waiting for June 11th...and I feel so excited, for no real reason. However my fortunes tell me otherwise...there is some sort of reason...yeah I did this chinese fortune thing in front of Asapin, so you can't say I'm lying or faking anything. It's the weirdest thing though cause I just woke up one morning and felt the way I do...

*cough 6545* V^^V

However, my fortune speaks of love and I just don't know, because to be honest I've never been in a relationship. Yeah I admit it!

DISNEYLAND HERE I COME AGAIN
I'm flying to LA...the plane ride's going to take a long time...BWAHAHAHA...but for Disneyland, it'll be worth it V^^V...the last time I went with the guys and it was really fun. I bought tons of things for my sisters and my mom. Oh the memories, the guys and I used to wait in line singing it's raining men, and dance around haha...the others waiting in line were watching us and laughing. To be honest, if the rest didn't do anything I probably wouldn't have because I'm the shy person, but recently the performances I've been doing helped me speak up a little more and become open I guess...YEAH ASAPIN LETS GO TO DISNEYLAND...


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-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Monday, May 23, 2005


   ...funny face

Piece of mind

六月 十一日
여섯월 열하나일
...I will wait until then...

日本語を勉強します.
한국말을 공부합니다.
ฉันเรียนภาษาไทย.
...haha there are more but yeah...it's ok...I guess you can say that I got bored. It feels as though I haven't been to school forever, because of...stuff...
V^^V

Yeah it feels good not to be sick, when I was sick, I was a lazy bum. I'd turn on the tv and hold onto the remote, yet watch whatever was on because I'd feel too tired to even click a button ^^" HAHA...

I don't know why people tell me that I look like I couldn't or wouldn't smack a fly *shakes fists*...to be honest, I would...I'm speaking the truth when I say that *smacks table*...only because I love food *sees floating food* and flies, they just "love" to spoil things *flaming eyes*...I will never give up my food to a fly...NO *kicks sibling, thinking "it" was a fly* ...NEVER...

Well I guess I should get back to working on my signature cause when I go back to school, they're going to make me sign tons of papers, and Asapin tells me my signature looks like a five year old's...which is why I should stick to stamps HAHA ^^V LOOPHOLE.

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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Sunday, May 22, 2005


   *Takes deep breathe*

Piece of mind

I feel so much better. Yeah I know that I get sick often, but my mom said that this time it was because I caught a cold and was too stubborn to stay home or take any medication and so it developed into something big...next time, I'll listen to my mom more.

YOSS! One event down, one more to go to this Thurday. It's going to be an awards night and Yes I'm going to have to dress up, probably a button up shirt and tie thing, but it's ok cause it'll be the last one for a while.

My auntie came back from Vietnam, and she bought me a new bracelet...YEAH I wear bracelets, I admit it, but I think it's common for Asians of both genders to wear bracelets. Or maybe just almost everyone I know wears it...I also heard that my grandmother is having a house made in Thailand. I think that's cool, I'll visit her some time HAHA...From Korea to Japan to china to every place...I'll take the circuitous route around HAHA ^^V...or maybe I'll just take a plane from Seoul there V^^V But I will visit over the summer I promise I'll see her some how...I wonder how many bedrooms is she going to have made ^^? WOW summer is going to be busy but fun at the same time YAY...

...awards night...and then...june 11th...i just have this feeling that june 11th is going to be big...I honestly do...

-Arima

TM tHoUgHtZ oF bLuE

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