Monday, January 22, 2007

Elective

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! I'll be starting my second year of uni in... um... end of February? Beginning of March?... I don't know, but anyway... I'm doing Interpreting & Translation (between English and Japanese). This year, I can choose one unit as an elective. In other words, anything. And that's the problem. I don't know what to do. I narrowed my choice down to 2 units: 1. English, Text & Writing (Level 1): "This unit covers a number of issues within literary and textual studies and creative writing, focusing on the areas of modernism and postmodernism. It considers the historical and cultural contexts of literary and textual production, examines a variety of literary genres and styles, and covers a range of contemporary critical theoretical approaches." 2. Psychology: Human Behaviour (Level 1): "Psychology is a field of scientific inquiry that uses a set of scientific techniques and methods to explain and understand the causes of behaviour. As a profession, psychology applies its knowledge to practical problems in human behaviour. This unit covers a range of topics in psychology at an introductory level including: the history of psychology, intelligence, social psychology, developmental psychology, personality and abnormal psychology." I've been asking lecturers for some addvice, but so far I've found no one that could help me make a decision. (Most lecturers are on holiday and wouldn't even reply to my e-mails) I think that the first unit would be useful for my course. But the second one would be useful for life in general... I'll be able to choose another unit as an elective next year, so I guess I could do English, Text & Writing this year, since it's Level 1 (kind of embarrassing to do it in my third year). Then do Psychology: Human Behaviour next year (maybe it'll be less embarrassing since it's not in my field)... This is one of the bad side to my personality: indecisivness. SOMEONE HELP ME!!!!! Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Monday, January 15, 2007

Arigatou

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! He broke up with me yesterday. It hurts like hell. I still love him with all my heart. And that's not going to change. Well, that's how I feel right now anyway. So yesterday, I was really really depressed and crying. Kept thinking about what went wrong. How I could've done things differently. What I felt at this point is perfectly described in the song "MILLOIN MILES AWAY" by WANDS. No particular section. Just the whole song. This morning, before work, I was still depressed and crying. During work, I was depressed too. Then on the way home, I got angry at myself. Angry because I'm hurting him by being sad. So I cryed one last time. And I'm pretty sure that I haven't cryed since. Here's exactly like the song "solitude ~shinjitsu no sayonara~" by Kinki Kids. When I got off the train, and was walking home, I started remembering everything he said to me after he broke up with me. "I want you be happy. Don't think I'm the source of happiness. If I stayed with you, you would just feel pain, not happiness... Dry your tears with love, new love. Can ease pain... I feel bad that I'm taking away the opportunity for you to love someone who loves you back... You should always believe in yourself. Like Yu-Gi-Oh!, trust in the heart of the cards, and there's nothing you can't do." I decided that I'm going to stick around in this world for a while longer. I love him and I trust him with my life, so I'm going to believe in what he's saying. I want to know if he's right or not. I want to know if it's really possible for me to love someone else. And I want to know if that preson would love me back. At this point, my feelings are described in the song "a Day in our Life" by Arashi. This is kind of ironic, because we used to sing/rap it all the time... Kind of a "our song"...? I would like to take this opportunity to thank him for everything that he's done for me. How he made me feel safe. How he made me feel special. How he gave me confidence. For making me want to live. And most of all, for loving me. Thank you everyone, for your kind words and wisdom. I still love him, and I'm still heart-broken, but I actually think that I'm going to be all right. Hontouni arigatou. Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Thursday, January 11, 2007

T_T

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! I'm completely depressed. I had this mask-making workshop with my mum (we were the teachers). Tuesday and today. And the kids there were asking me questions about my love life. I really didn't know what to say to them. It's not like I can say "Yeah, I have a boy friend. But he doesn't love me anymore. And I think the next time I see him, he's going to break up with me. But I still love him very much"... Their questions made me miss him a lot. And one thing this 10 year boy said really cut me. He first asked how old I was. When I said that I'm 20, he didn't believe me. All the kids there decided that I'm 14. Then the boy asked how old my boy friend was. When I told him that he's 22, he said "You can't go out with him! He's too old for you! You're only 14!" T_T This boy and his little brother kept asking me these strange questions. I'll write you guys the dialogue. "10" means the 10 year old boy, "7" means the 7 year old little brother: 7: Do you kick him? me: No. 7: Do you punch him? me: No. Why would I do those things? 10: What do you do when the 2 of you fight? me: We never fought. 10: You haven't been with eachother long, have you? me: Nearly 4 months. 10: That's way too short! Are you going to marry him? me: ... I don't know about those things... 10: Do you live with eachother? me: No. 7: Why do you love him? me: (How does he know that I love him?) Because he's the greatest person in the world. 10: I hate him. 7: Have you guys slept with eachother yet? me: O.o NO. But there was one question this other boy asked which I was able to answer without any hesitation: "Do you love him?" The answer was of course "Yes". The kids really hit a sore spot. I know that it's not the kids' fault, but their questions really hurt. I want to be able to tell my boy friend that I love him, without crying... But at this point, it's probably too much to ask... Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Sunday, January 7, 2007

20 years old

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! Despite popular belief, I am not 15 years old. I'm 20. Whenever I tell someone my age for the first time, or I see someone I haven't seen in years, they think I'm 15 years old. I'll say it again. I'M TWENTY YEARS OLD! I may be short and look young, but that doesn't mean I'm 15. I actually had some people say "no, you're 15" and tried to change my mind about being 20... I can't change my age you know... Today was Seijin-shiki in Japan. That's Coming-of-age-celebrations. Anyone who turned 20 this year, by today, celebrates coming of age. I, of course being in Australia, have no way of going to the celebrations. Not that I wanted to. It's all about dressing up in a fancy kimono and listening to a bunch of old people talk about being an adult. I hate wearing fancy clothes. Honestly, that's the only reason I declined my grandmother's invitation to fly to Japan. Oh, and I have to go to Chiba-prefecture for the celebratons, because my address in Japan is there. I don't know anyone there. All my friends are in the Yokohama-prefecture. Imean, why do I have to wear unconfortable clothing, sit among people I don't know and listen to the same crap I heard in high school? My mum wanted me to wear her kimono, so that she could take pictures, but I of course, allowed no such thing. Yeah, yeah. I may be cold and bitter. But that's how I feel right now... Oh, and I realised that the pics from yesterday's post were nice and small. Um... How did that happen? Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Saturday, January 6, 2007

Puppet & Light bulb & BF

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! For the past few days, I've been making a puppet with my mum. It's made from paper mache. It's a sample for a work shop we're doing next week. Mum and I are going to teach a bunch of kids how to make paper mache masks. Here's a pic: The pj is from a doll I had, some 10 years ago. I used to make my cat wear it when she was a kitten. ^^' Yeah, this puppet looks weird, but it's not a bad first attempt, right? Right? A few days ago, my lamp spat out my light bulb when I lit it. Well, it only sapt out the glass bit. It was freaky! My land lady has the glass bit now, but I have the metal bit: That's my bed side lamp's stand in the back ground. It's not the one that spat out the light bulb. It was my ceiling lamp. Come to think of it, it was kind of like a shooting star... Um, I know that the pics are really really huge. I've been trying to fix it, but nothing's working. T_T My post titled \(^o^)/ has a pic of the Harbour Bridge, and it's nice and small. And I did the same thing this time. So why are the pics so big this time? T_T I think I sound cheerful on today's post. I'm not. I still hate 2007. And things aren't any better with my bf. I wrote him an e-mail saying everything I want to say. Since I'm really shy at expressing my emotion, I believe/hope that it was the right thing to do. There's only 1 thing I'm not shy about (since not being shy is my New Year's Resolution) is my feelings for him. He knows of this blog, so he may be reading this... If you are, and feel shy, or think that this is inappropriate, and you want me to delete this post, I will. But anyway, I'm saying this and I don't care that the whole world can see it: I LOVE YOU Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Wednesday, January 3, 2007

   I hate 2007

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! I already hate 2007. Everything's going really bad. My boy friend says that he only loves me 20~30%. I still love him 100%. I feel like it's all my fault things came to this. I'm not sleeping well. I wake up every hour. When I do sleep, I have nightmares. My chest/heart hurts like there's no tomorrow. My stomach hurts all the time. I have no apetite. I'm having period pains, but no period. And I'm about 2~3 weeks late. If I wasn't a virgin, I would say that I'm pregnant. I want to see my boy friend to talk, but I have work next week. And I have to prepare for it this week. Since I was little, I was able to come up with a solution to every problem I had. But not this time... I've completely lost the will to live... Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Monday, January 1, 2007

   \(^o^)/

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! Wow! It's 2007 already!? So exciting! Yet... I haven't seen my boy friend since Christmas! T_T The fire works were ok. The park my parents and I went to only had 2 toilets: 1 for women, and 1 for men... About 50 women were lined up to go to the toilet, and 5 men were lined up for their toilet. So the women started to line up for the men's too. ^^' Other than that, it was good. Oh, and there were fire works at 9pm too, for families with small children that cannot stay until midnight. And a piece of the fire works flew into the garden of a house, and there was a fire! But they put it out quikly. Phew. That incident was the highlight of the day. Oh, before I forget, Ed from FMA is said to be 165cm tall, but that includes his platfom shoes and his antenna (his hair). So how tall would he be? 150~155cm? By the way, I'm 153cm... T_T Sorry, I don't know the measurements in feet. ^^' Sorry, I haven't done anything since the New Year's Eve celebrations, so I don't have anything to write about... So here's a photo of the Harbour Bridge and the Luna Park of Sydney. That's a ? on the Harbour Bridge. It later became a coat hanger... I don't know what it means, but it's a part of the theme this year... Don't ask me about the theme, because I don't know what it was. ^^' Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Saturday, December 30, 2006

   Last!

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! Ok!!!!! This is my last post for this year! And I don't have anything good to say. T.T I'll hopefully be going to the Sydney Harbour Bridge to watch the fire works. Dad's being a wet blanket by the way. ^^' Mom's really excited to go. She's made enough picnic food to last a week... This year's been pretty good to me: +great old friends... +great new friends... +great first boy friend... +good school year... +got first job... (doesn't matter how bad it was, it's still something to write on my resume) +and I think I've grown half a centimetre... (I think I'm finally taller than Ed from FMA...) How was the year for everyone? Hope the year 2007 will be great for everyone! HAVE A SAFE AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!! Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Friday, December 29, 2006

   Christmas!

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! I hope that everyone had a wonderful Christmas! I had a good time. Had a family Christmas lunch. My boyfriend came over later with his friends and we went to the park. What a relaxing day it was. Especially because I DON'T HAVE TO WORK!!!!! Life is so stress free without that job. I don't know how I survived... Wait I didn't... I was so stressed out and depressed while I was working... I just hope that I or anyone else would have to go through what I did. From the 8th untill the 12th, I have a casual position at a community centre as a receptionist. And on the 9th and the 11th, my mother and I are doing a workshop with some kids at the community centre. I'm really looking forward for that week. After that job's done, I'm unemployed again. So I have to start looking for another job. I'm not really looking forward to that... So busy, yet so little time... There are a lot of books and comic books that I haven;t read yet. When will I get the chance to!? T.T Anyway, that's it for now... How was everyone's Christmas? Any plans for the New Year? Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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Thursday, December 21, 2006

   WHY!?

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Introduction Powered by eSnips.com Warning: The player starts with its maximum volume. So please be careful. Open Heart! Today, I was supposed to have a shift from 3pm~9pm. But my arrogant supervisor called me at 10pm last night, saying that there's been a change. Apparently, who ever has a shift before me cancelled, so he wants me to work from 9:30am~5:30pm... 8 hours!?... T_T But I said that it was ok... So this morning, I go to work and sign in. The girl there asks me if I want to leave my bag there, or take it with me... So I tell her about the bloody security guard. Then she says that I can take my phone with me. And if the security guard gets angry, I can come back and put it into my bag. So I said ok. Then I messaged my other supervisor, like I'm supposed to at the beginning of every shift. I get a message right after, asking me to call my arrogant supervisor. The arrogant supervisor tells me that there's been another change in shifts, so I might only be working untill 3:30, so he'll call back when a decision's been made. I told him that I may not answer my phone because of the security guard. He said that he never knew anything about the whole phone thing... And told me to be patient about it. I told him to call the toy department directly if I don't answer my phone. So I go to the toy department, and who do I see? The girl who cancelled her shift! We both got a huge shock! @.@ It turns out that she cancelled her shift for Saturday, but the supervisor thought she meant Friday. So I tried calling the supervisor (the arrogant one), but he didn't answer. So I called the other supervisor, and told him the problem we were having. He said that he'll contact the arrogant supervisor, and tell him to call back. So we wait, and I get a call... In the end, the girl's working today untill 3pm. And I will be working from 3pm~8pm... *sigh* Back to where we started... With 1 less hour... So now I'm home again, killing some time... *sigh* If this job didn't end on the 24th, I would so quit right here and right now! Credits Shugo Chara! © Peach-Pit Site hosted by myotaku.com Layout edited by Master Hiko Layout's base by 311

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