Sunday, July 13, 2008

okay. i need to get this out somewhere.

my life at this point in time

have you ever wanted someone so bad that it hurt?
laying in bed with that person night after night and knowing that even wanting that person was wrong?
welcome to my life.
i'm in love with my best friend.
and this revelation is traumatic for me.
we were all kicked out of our house, and i've been spending every night over at her house.
it kills me to be there, so close to her, and never be able to tell her how i feel.
my boyfriend says he understands, but he teases me constantly over it.
and makes me feel even more guilty for this.
i regret even being honest and telling him in the first place.
i really wish i could tell her how i feel.
it eats me up night after night.
how much i long to just touch her or kiss her.
it's wrong,
i know it is,
but i can't help but want her to know.
three long excrusiating years
i've held this in for
and now its just unbearable.



i know no one reads this, but just getting it out makes me feel better,
even if it is to no one in particular.
thank you.

-sam
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