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Monday, July 4, 2005

Happy birthday
Yeah, its the fourth. And you all know what that means, big 'sploshuns and well..more big sploshuns. So lets celebrate! Got some nice homegrown skunk, played monopoly...blew shit up. Fuckin awesome man... happy fourth to all and to all a good night.

Oh yeah, and some more new pics.
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playin with the contrast, cool pic though.
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Song of the Moment
Type O Negative - Bloody Kisses

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Saturday, July 2, 2005

Bored as fuck. Havent been sleeping well lately...These damn dreams. They are so happy, yet so depressing...and they never last. I hate what they do to me, but yet I dont want them to go...those dreams are all I have left.

Anyways, new pic.
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Yeah. Went to Jasmines party last night. Got home around 2 AM, so dont get pissed off at me for not being online and shiz. In other news...wait, there is no other news. Whatever. How was everyone elses friday?

Song of the Moment
As Hope Dies - The Sound of Hollow Words

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Thursday, June 30, 2005

Bitch, please.
Today was bitchin. Went to hang out with justin and danielle(aka dani). Got attacked by parakeets, ate a snowcone, blew some stuff up, started a moshpit in the street, chillaxed muchly, and got a gun pulled out on me. And another thing...Dani is crushing on me so fuckin bad, but shes too shy to say anything. Kinda cute. But yeah, maybe i'll tell the story later if I ever get around to it. Peace holmes.

Song of the Moment
Slipknot - Vermilion pt 2

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Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Welcome to the end of everything
Nothing lasts forever. No matter how great, its all dust in the end. What are we in the eyes of eternity? What do our insignifigant lives matter? Is there even a point? For most of my life, i've beleived love to be truest reason for human existance. Now, looking back, I see just how pointless it all is. Looking into her eyes, I see my life, my purpose, my dreams. I found my true love. My one and only. They say true love comes only once, and when it comes you cant let it slip from your grasp. You cannot let it die. But I have failed...the part of me that is you. Now what reason is left to carry on? Clipped wings can never fly again, you know.

I couldnt understand why I chose to live, when all I wanted most was to die. When the only thing I've ever wanted was gone. Now I do. Once more I have a reason to live. From this point forward, love is dead to me. Love is fucking dead. Never again, never again will I open myself to another. My new goal in life, pure and simple, is to make it the best fucking joyride possible. From this point on, I'll do whatever the fuck I want. And the rest of you bitches can burn in hell.

Forgotten Tomb - Loves Burial Ground

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Saturday, June 25, 2005

One last dagger up my sleeve
So i've had plenty of time to think about some shit thats been goin on in my life, and in my head. I've come to realize just how pointless love is. When you let love become more than a game, you just open yourself up for pain. Sure, you enjoy it for a while, but like most addictive drugs, when the low comes...its nasty as fuck. And once your supply runs out, theres nothing but that low. And nothing will satisfy your craving like that which you have not. All there is left to do is cling to lost dreams, or suffer the withdrawals until its all out of your system.
But true love never dies..and neither does the pain.

Aint love a bitch. Stupid fuckin emo rant. Oh well, thats out of my system. Let the cry ring forth: FUCK THAT BITCH!

Song of the Moment
Forgotten Tomb - Subway Apathy

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Saturday, June 4, 2005

For fucks sake nikki...answer your phone.

I've been so sick this week....its pretty lame. My head felt like it was going to explode... Yeah, my week was shit. And my weekend is going about the same way. Some drama happened this morning, which sucked ass. Nikki wanted me to come over to her house, to go with her to Busch...anyways, I wake up at about 7:30 in the morning(on a saturday...wtf is that?) and get my mom to drive me to her house...so we get about half there and Nikki calls and says theres no room for me in her mom's vehicle. WE turn around and stop at hardee's for breakfast. As soon as we pull into the driveway, Nikki calls me back and says she isnt going to Busch but wants me to come over anyways. Yeah, what the fuck is that? I wasnt about to ask my mom to turn around and drive me back out there after all that...
So I was laying on my bed eating chicken biskuits and drinking my ice cold dr. pepper...then I Fall asleep. I wake up about 5 hours later, my dr. pepper. is warm and tastes like nasty ass school water, and the dog ate the rest of my chicken. ...I hate that fuckin dog.

So here I am, I dont know why I'm so damn tired...but I'm going to take a shower and get back to bed. Nikki, if you finally decide you want to talk to me...feel free to give me a call.

Song of the Moment
As Hope Dies - Emotion Over Repetition

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Friday, May 27, 2005

Thank bob for friends.
Today wasnt half as bad as I thought it would be...And i'm fuckin glad for that. Would have felt pretty stupid if i broke down in tears... -.-
I'm so lucky to have such good friends. Anyways, today was easy. Dissected a worm in biology, extra credit assignment in algebra, watched bill nye the science guy in health...slacker days rule. But then came study hall. Coach mitchell decided to be an asshole and send me to the dean..who wasnt even in her office....So i got to stand in the hallway for half an hour. -.- The dean finally got back and was a total bitch. But she got me back into class at least. Then I played "Beg Your Neighbor" with Kyle, Tori, Boner, and Ace. Yeah...

Song of the Moment
Virgin Black - Our Wings Are Burning

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Thursday, May 26, 2005

The liberation of my soul...
How ironic it is..my soul "liberated" from the shackles of my confinement, yet I feel like such shit. Should liberation not bring happiness and dancing in the streets?
Perhaps liberate isnt the best word, lets try skullfucked. In case you are wondering what the hell i'm going on about, Nikki broke up with me today. I've seen this coming for quite some time now, actually...and how depressing it was to know there was nothing I could do.
I should be either suicidally depressed or homicidally pissed right now...but I'm not. Its almost a good feeling, knowing that theres nobody left to care about, nothing left to work for. Its like i've finally reached the top of the ladder that is my life...theres nothing left. This is as high as I'll ever get. The path ahead is dark, but theres only 2 options left. Follow the path of darkness, and accept what it has in store for me..or to jump...down, down, down...

But thats what I Get.

Song of the Moment
Marduk - Deathmarch

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Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Later that day...
You know what really pisses me off? Theres hardly any hardcore the-badguy-always-wins anime out there. I dont mean like Vash, I mean flat out evil, dirty, underhanded bastards that would off their own mother for 5 bucks. I REALLY want to see some of that...tired of all this goody goody touchy-feely, romantic and playful as fuck(think fruits basket) anime. But you know, I dont want plotless hack and slash, I want something I can follow... Any suggestions?
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