Monday, July 18, 2005

   Oh.... My.... RA! *laughs*

I found this fan fic on someone else's journal... but it's so funny! >.< I'll put a link up for those who want to read the whole thing, but, one, it's a beyblade fanfic, two, there's swearing, but it's funny! and three, well, there is no three, but its a cool number, and as I read fan fic I will add random lines I think are funny, and I'll try to censor them, for those who don't like 'fowl language' but I think it's funny! XD
Find the Real FanFic here! :D ^^ =3

"RAY, THAT'S A F*CKING RED LIGHT!! STOP!" Kai yells ignoring the insult that came from the back.

"Yeah, like I'm gonna obey some colorful lights on a pole." he answers flatly.

"YOU HAVE TO BY LAW!! LAAAW!!!" Kenny screeches in his high-pitched voice.

"Yeah, like I'm gonna obey the law." was Ray's last line before Kai stopped recording.

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What's this do?" Ray pulls a lever and the wipers go on "AHH! The car's mad at me! It spat at me." Ray tried to shield himself from the washer fluid that was not coming in.

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"Then let's do it. I'm gonna leave after I do it. Damn, I went too far. I gotta do the turn of the block."

Kai can't believe what he's hearing. "You stupid...there's no insult to describe you. Just shift the gear into reverse. You can go backwards."

"A backward driving car!? In-f*cking-credible!! I love this car!" he says while hugging the steering wheel.

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RAY, STOP! THERE'S KIDS IN THE STREET!!" ('tis Kai)

"Nah, those are small trees."

"IN THE MIDDLE OF THE F*CKING STREET!?! WAKE THE F*CK UP!!"

"Hmm...good point."

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"You sure you know what you're doing? I mean, you said you can't drive." Kai wanted to make sure he would live for a while longer.

"How hard can it be?"

"Very hard if you come from a place where the closest thing to technology is...what? A blender? A bucket? Indoor plumbing?"

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" I ll go look at cookies. And film you taking an...ORDER!" Ray leaves, but still films Kai.

" Hello, can I help you?" Kai says politely.

Ray to camera "What a laugh. Kai wants to help." to Kai.

" Hi, I ll have..." the customer starts.

" SHUT UP!" Kai screams "You ll have what I give you without a fuss, got it!?" he leaves.

" Excuse me?! What kind of bullsh*t is this? Come back here, you punk!"

Kai comes back "I m giving you this slice of cheese I dropped on the floor. (holds up paper with dirty slice of cheese) I m punching it up at 30 dollars. How s that? Seems fair."

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Kai's arm is seen playing with toy cars." Vrooom, vroom! Oooom! Screech! Crash!"

" F*ck, Kai!! Stop it!"

" No." he pretends to cry

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Kai gets a little pissy. "Why do you have to complain about everything I do? Kai, the tree s crooked. Kai, you re walking around the house without pants, again. Kai, why are you gluing feathers to the wall?"

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Ray to camera "Well, strangely enough they're back in one piece. I'm Ray." he turns to Kai, who's punching out Max "Kai, he's unconscious. We have a rule. No punching anyone when they're knocked out, remember?"

Kai looks up at him "Shut up. He's awake. (fakes Max's voice) I'm Max and I want Kai to punch me. SUGAR!"

" No Kai."

" Fine. I'm Kai. And I m gonna throw Max in the water, like so." Kai drags Max into the water "If he drowns, it's not my fault. Now, I'm gonna eat, cuz I'm starving. Good-bye. That raccoon looks tasty. Let's eat it!" He starts chasing the raccoon into the forest, but finds something better "Hey, look, a bear. It looks tasty. Let's eat it!"

" Kai, no!" Ray runs.

Camera stops before Ray could stop Kai from trying to kill a bear.

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They go to Kai's room in the basement and drop their bags. Ray yelps and jumps back.

Kai asks camly,"What's your problem?"

Ray looks at him stupidly."You mean you don t notice your bag MOVING AND MAKING NOISE!?"

"Well, no duh, Max is in there."

"…..Max. In the bag. Are you CRAZY?"

"No. You think I would leave for a few days to Russia knowing I wouldn't have Max to slap around, everyday? Are YOU crazy?"

"Max let you pack him? You actually forced him into a bag and had him put onto a plane with the cargo and flown across many countries to here and he was turning on that thing with other luggage and we picked him up and dumped him here?" Ray doubts everything even as he says it, but nows it's probably true. Kai is insane.

Kai's simple answer is,"I didn't force him."

"Oh yeah. He CHOSE to go into a bag when asked by none other than Kai, the retard who hurts him everyday. I'm not buying it."

"No really! He chose to come. I gave him a choice. Either go in the bag or I cut his throat with the really sharp knife I was holding to his neck at that particular moment in time. I swore to him I would do it."

"You threatened his life!? You're f*cking stupid! Get him out!"

"What for? He stopped moving. (points at still bag)"

"Because it means he's unconscious! He needs air, f*ckbag!"

"What a party pooper."

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Kai remembers,"Now, for our bang-boom ceremony."

Tala remembers, too."My favorite part."

Ray knows nothing."Bang-boom ceremony?"

"We choose some armor and throw it down the stairs."

"I'm assuming the bang-boom is the sound it makes."

"Excellent work! We'll choose one each."

"I choose my original Max." (They painted the suits of armor)

"I choose my depressed and suicidal clown."

Ray has a harder time, though."I choose my fairy."

They drag their armor to the stairs in the main hall and they find…

Max! "Kai! I'm gonna kill you! Where am I?!"

"You're in Moscow, Russia. My house. Is it pretty?"

"It's f*cking confusing. Somehow the roof is connected to the basement and third floor at the same time by one staircase consisting of five steps."

"Please stop explaining my own house to me, I live here after all. I know it inside out."

"What're those?"

"Armor. Look, I made this one look like you!"

Max retorts sarcastically, "I'm flattered. Hey, I don't dress like that, anymore!"

Ray says,"I guess he didn't come by choice."

Kai sighs."I said he chose to go in the bag. I never said I told him where he would end up."

Max starts running up the stairs.

Tala orders,"Now!"

Everyone gives their soldier a push and watch them crash/bounce/roll/tumble down toward Max.

Max cries,"F*CK!" and starts running down, but is hit by Ray's fairy.

Ray laughs."My fairy is so violent."

Tala jumps up and down."Let's do it, again!"

Kai says,"Wait. (runs to Max) Argh! (punches Max, who's lying helpless on the floor, multiple times) Don't you EVER wander around without telling me again! You have any idea how strong the urge gets to punch you when you're nowhere to be found?! I guess not, idiot."

"Ohhhh." Max groans weakly.

"Let's eat!"

Ray agrees."I'm starving."

Tala realises,"I see a full meal in front of me. (points at Max) I say we flambé the f*cking Powerpuff Girl!"

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Well, that's all I'm gonna add for now, if you think that's funny, you can always check out the whole story...... *laughs* >.< XD

I'll be slowly or fastly, depending on how fast I read, adding more, so if you liked these you might wanna check back and see if I added more ^^ =3 XD

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