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Friday, November 5, 2004

Why is this subject thing even here, anyway?
Cry! I'm all alone tonight. *tear* Coz no one could spend da night. *sniff* But I'll be okay... I guess.

I just hope someone will be able to come over tomorrow so I won't be ALL alone ALL weekend... *sniff* Tear for mentaru.

I actually HUGGED Morgan today! I was amazed with myself! Actually having the nerve to give her a hug, and she actually hugged me back! I was surprised... but not that much. ^_~

Sometimes I have to wonder about how Morgan really feels. She gives me such confusing feedback.

Okay, randomness: how would one buy a bouquet of roses for someone for Valentine's day without being too conspicuous about it (or, in other words, not have parents wonder why one would have a bouquet of roses, or why one would WANT a bouquet of roses)?

My nice friend Jazzy has suggested something, but I need another opinion. Please help-eth me! I really want to give Morgan roses...

I wonder why there isn't anything on cable on Fridays? That's odd. But, I guess I can find SOMETHING entertaining to watch... Meh. Ja, peeps!

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Wednesday, November 3, 2004

One big fat lie - for here.
I'm depressed again. God, I hate when Erin gets all depressed, coz she gets me talking about things and gets me depressed, too. It's not very happy. Coz depression makes me tired and cranky.

I hate my life. If my life weren't so fucking irritating, I wouldn't be so depressed all the time. I mean, the whole Morgan thing is really starting to get to me. And the fact that I'm living a complete lie is really grating on my sanity, too.

Nobody. That's who I am. I'm a nobody. And I try so hard to be a somebody, but that just kills me in the end. And that's why I'm living a lie. People are so convinced that I'm this strange little girl who probably needs mental help, yet, I'm just a normal nobody putting on a big act for the world.

Encore! That's what the world is saying. Encore. But I'm not going to give it an encore. Because I'm planning on not having children, so my legacy ends with me. The show ends now. It doesn't get a sequel. And it doesn't need a sequel.

The show doesn't need to go on.

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Tuesday, November 2, 2004

Call me the Voilent Pasifist Demon Child. (No, the line's 'Call me ISHMAEL.' | Oh, right...)
Boy, I've been really lazy lately. But, you know, that's just me. Lazy. w00t.

According to William Hargraves (who is in the band and my German class), I am a Demon Child. OH YEAH!! GO ME!! I am PROUD to be a Demon Child! And, I am also a Violent Pasifist. And, yes, I do realize that that is an oxymoron. But, TOO BAD! Coz it's an awesome title.

The Voilent Pasifist Demon Child. How does that sound? Heh. I like it.

But, unfortunately, Frau is going to move us next six weeks, so I won't be able to pester William. But, of course, I'll still find ways to torture him with the word uke. Bwahaha! He shall never know what it means! (Unless, of course, he decides to ask his Japanese teacher, which I doubt he will.)

You know, speaking of being lazy, I probably need to work on my fics... Like Subtle Subterfuge and False Reality. Bah. I don't much feel like it, but I want to please my reviewers. *sigh*

And now I've thought up a NEW fic as well. WHY?? It's kind of irritating, thinking up new things when you're supposed to be working on other things that have already been thought up. Ah, well.

It's a Gundam Wing fic, 3x4. (IT'S FREAKING UNDENIABLE, DAMN YOU!) It's about Trowa going on a long search for Quatre, his true love. And it's loosely based off of Big Fish. It's going to be a really WAFFy fic, I can tell already...

Well, I probably ought to get my lazy self a-workin' on my OTHER fics, so, if you don't mind... (But, I'm not making any promises that I'll get anywhere...)

Ja ne! ^_~

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Sunday, October 31, 2004

Of a belated birthday and Halloween.
Uugh. Sorry for not posting on Zoicite's birthday. I was just really busy and really tired, and I didn't really feel like posting. So, we can all wish him a happy birthday now. Who cares if it's belated by one friggin day. Bah.



The Halloween Party I went to last night was fun, for a while... but then they started playing Soul Caliber II, and it just got boring. I was just sitting there on the couch until the party ended, every once and a while moving or saying something because Erin wanted to talk to me.

I met the acclaimed Fluffy at the party. I didn't expect him to be black. But he was, yo. A full blooded brotha. I also met Shippo, who acasionally popped up in topics at school. Didn't really mingle or get to know any of them, though.

And now, today, I must put on me costume again and go rid the nice people of their candy. I'm hoping I can go with friends, like I've done every year I've gone trick-or-treating. w00t. I hope there won't be any parents. I've been able to go with a group for about two years now. Oh, yeah, baby.

Well, enough of my rambling. Coz you people prolly don't wanna hear any more. And I'm tired of rambling to you. So... until my next post. Ja ne!

And Happy Halloween!! ^___~

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Friday, October 29, 2004

Anime Birthday Special Post: Setsuna Meiou!!
w00t!! Happy Birthday Sailor Pluto!! ^_^

And, now, for the traditional singing of Happy Birthday!!

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday dear SETSUNA!!
Happy Birthday to you!

And many more...!!

Hooray!! *dances around* Have a happy, happy birthday Setsuna!! ^__~

((Yes, this is a short anime b-day post... only coz it's a female, and I don't have much to say... meh. Just wait till tomorrow. It's Zoicite's birthday! lol.))

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Thursday, October 28, 2004

   Of sleepy-ness and other unimportant matters.
I just came from an informational band meeting. Bleh. It was SO boring. I mean, I don't know why I really needed to be there. Me mum coulda just told me all o' this shtuff. Bah.

I am incredibly tired. Maybe I should hit the ole sack. MAYBE...

Okay, I'll visit dreamland in about ten minutes. Just let me finish posting! ^_^

I can't wait for Saturday! I get to go to my first Halloween party! w00t! I've ne'er been to a Halloween party before... So I'm happy. I'm still wondering what Morgan's gonna be though. She keeps telling me that her costume is 'da bomb' or 'awesome'. *shrug* Guess I'll have to wait and find out.

Wee, tomorrow is Setsuna's birthday (from Sailor Moon, mind you)! Yay! Time for another Anime Birthday Special Post!

*yawns and rubs eyes* Well, mentaru is sleepy. So mentaru is gonna go nighty-night. I hope I have a good dream coz Erin got me all thinking about all the problems in my life, and then she left abrubtly without saying good-bye, so those thoughts are still lingering in my mind. *sigh*

Oyasumi my friends, and ja ne.

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Monday, October 25, 2004

   Anime Birthday Special Post: Seto Kaiba!!
Yatta! Today is Seto Kaiba's birthday!! w00t!! Now, for the almighty and traditional singing of Happy Birthday!!

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday dear SETO!!
Happy Birthday to you!


WOOOO!! We love you Seto!!

Jounouchi: AND SO DO I!!! ^____^ *heart eyes*

Now, don't forget to:
1. Wish Seto a Happy Birthday
2. Give him a present
3. Glomp him
4. Read a SetoxJounouchi, SetoxYami, SetoxYugi, or SethxAtem fanfic

I command-eth thee, go do one or all of the above and be merry!! ^_~

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Thursday, October 21, 2004

Together Forever

Nothing but darkness.

Darkness everywhere. Even the shadows were engulfed in the darkness.

Two trees that formed an arch with their branches hid in the shadows. But they also held a dark secret.


I ran. I ran fast.

My legs were starting to feel like Jell-O. Whatever was chasing me wasn't behind me anymore, but I wasn't sure, so I kept my pace. In a few minutes, I was sure my legs would give out completely, but, until then, I ran.

A few more minutes passed; I was right. My legs gave out and I fell to the ground, tumbling and rolling--down a hill that I was grateful was not steep. When I finally tumbled to a stop, I grumbled, getting up and brushing myself off.

A dim light illuminated the area. I looked around, wondering where I was. A long rose bush stretched out in front of me. Oddly, the roses looked black. But I didn't have time to ponder this. I tried looking through the bush, to see what might be on the other side, but it was just too thick. Trying my luck, I walked alongside the bush, hoping I might find an opening large enough for me to crawl through.

I wasn't quite so lucky. I did find an opening, but it wasn't very big. Satisfied with at least this small opening, I lowered myself onto my hands and knees. As I crawled through the small space, thorns cut my clothes, cut my arms, cut my sides.

I had expected the bush to be maybe only a foot or so thick, but it seemed to be miles thick. By the time I reached the other side, my dress was ripped in many places, and my arms and sides were bloodied, as were my clothes because blood had seeped through.

I looked around at my surroundings. It didn’t seem to look any different than the side I had just come from. Only, backwards. Not wanting to go back through the bush, I began forward. It seemed to only get darker as I walked farther ahead. My cuts were still fresh, so I felt a burning, stinging sensation each time I moved. I needed to tend to my wounds, but I didn't have any materials--especially since my dress was already ripped enough.

It continued to get darker and darker, and I wished I had a match so I could see where I was going. It was getting irritating not being able to see. So, I had to walk very carefully not to trip and worsen my already bad wounds.

Hours seemed to pass as I continued to walk through the darkening darkness. But, thankfully, I saw a light in the distance ahead. A faint light--a torch light, maybe. I walked towards it instinctively.

I didn't notice that I passed under two trees whose branches formed an arch because it was still too dark to see much of anything around me. The light was brighter now, but I still was oblivious of the trees, and even if I had seen them, they wouldn't have been of any meaning to me.

I quickened my pace and ran towards the light now. I was right. It was torch light. But, to my surprise, I also found that these torches were planted on trees, and they were lighting a cobblestone path towards a building that I couldn't quite make out.

Shelter, I thought. And maybe people, too. Maybe there will be someone who can dress my wounds ....

Without hesitating, I broke off into a run towards said building. In no time, even though I still felt a burning, stinging sensation in my arms and sides, I came within a few feet of the building.

It was five stories tall, from what I could tell. And it was such a magnificent building. It’s beauty captivated me for a moment. But then I realized what I had run all the way for, so I tentatively walked up the steps to the mahogany double doors. A torch was lit on either side of the doors, so I could easily see the large knockers on both doors. I lightly touched one of the brass knockers before I let it do the job it had been named--knock.

Within seconds, as if I had been expected, one of the doors opened. I stared into the face of the most beautiful person I had ever seen in my life. The first thing that caught my attention was his unnatural golden-black eyes. How could a person have such an eye color? It was implausible. But, he made it plausible because his eyes were that color. I seemed to be caught in a trace, as I stared for what seemed like hours. I know it is rude to stare, but how could I not when such beautiful eyes are staring back?

A slight breeze blew around us, and it was only then that I realized how long and captivatingly black his hair was. The small amount of moonlight that reflected on his hair made it shimmer with a silvery brilliance. His hair swayed slightly in the gentle breeze, and I wanted to reach out and touch it, but I seemed to be immobile. I wanted him to say something now ... anything. I wanted to hear his voice.

"Those wounds are fresh, I can tell." His voice was as gentle as the breeze. I wanted to hear it again. "I can also tell you've been traveling for a while. If you come inside, I can tend to those wounds, and you can rest." He smiled. If I were a candle, I would have melted from the warmth his whole body radiated when he smiled.

Somehow, my mouth managed to form words. "Thank you," I said, accepting his offer. He motioned me inside, and I stepped into the large foyer, gaping at how vast the interior was.

He put his arm around my shoulders and led me into a medium-sized room to the right of where we were standing. "So, tell me," he began after he had instructed me to lie down on what looked like a plush operating table. It had a back rest, so it wasn't exactly an operating table .... He started rummaging around a cluttered table full of medical things--medicines, antibiotics, bandages, and the like. "Did you have to face that terrible rose bush, too?"

"How did you know?" I asked, my voice almost quavering.

"Oh, just a lucky guess, I suppose. And, anyway, those wounds look like the work of thorns. I should know--I've got somewhat of a rose fetish, especially for black ones, like on that bush, and I get cut all the time. I guess it's just my carelessness, though--that gets me cut."

"Oh ..." was all I could manage to say. He came over to me with antibiotics and bandages and started dressing my wounds. When he applied the antibiotics, it stung, and I had to bite my lip not to flinch. I got used to it after the third or fourth time, and it actually became quite nice having his soft touch against my skin, and his gentle movements wrapping the bandages around my wounds. We did not speak as he worked, and I merely watched his movements, in almost the same trance as before.

When he finished, he put his supplies back where he had taken them from, and he led me to a large dining room. The long table stretched at least ten feet, at the most. "Why is the table so long?" I asked, getting more comfortable around my host.

"Because it's meant for numerous amounts of people gathered for holiday feasts or for large meals after a ball held in the Ball Room," he answered calmly. "And, don't worry, it wasn't a stupid question." He smiled at me again, and then guided me to the seat next diagonally from the seat on the end nearest us. "Please, have a seat. I'll bring you something to eat."

I nodded. After he left the room, I pulled the chair out and sat down. I waited in silence for him to return. When he did, a silver tray was placed in front of me with all sorts of foods on it. "Bon appétit," he said, bowing, and then taking making himself comfortable in the seat on the end.

As hungry as I was, I ever so slowly picked at my food. He was being too kind. I ate some, but I quickly became full. And I soon shoved the tray away. "I'm full, really."

He nodded.

"You speak French?" I asked him.

"Oui," he replied, "je parle le français."

I looked at him blankly. "What?"

"I said, 'Yes, I speak French.'"

"Oh, right."

"Why did you ask?"

"No reason, really."

He gave me a half smile. "My name is Alexander, by the way."

"Alexander," I repeated. "I like that name."

"Thank you. It's Greek, you know."

"Then why do you speak French?"

Alexander laughed. "You're funny. I like people with a sense of humor. Most of my visitors aren't quite so fun. But, then again, I don't get many visitors. Most of the time I only have the animals to keep me company."

"It must be lonely, then," I said sympathetically. "With no one but animals."

"Ah, but the animals are actually quite good company. But, enough about me. You know my name now, but I still don't know yours."

"Oh, I'm Aurora," I said, almost a little flustered. "Aurora Vancouver."

"Isn't Vancouver a place in Canada?"

I looked at Alexander, just a little irritated that he was making fun of my last name. "Yes, but it can also be a last name, thank you very much."

Alexander chuckled. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be ..." I mumbled, crossing my arms and looking at the finishing on the table. "It's not like you're the first one to make fun of my last name."

Regret filled Alexander's eyes. "I'm sorry," he said again, more softly this time. He lifted my chin gently with his hand. I looked into his eyes again. "Please don't be mad."

I stared into his eyes again. The more I looked at his eyes, the more I wondered how they could be the color they were. "What are you?" I whispered unconsciously.

I awoke in a soft bed, staring up into Alexander's eyes.

Those eyes.

What had happened last night? And where was I now? Alexander had never taken me into this room.

"You're awake, finally."

"Alexander? What happened? Why do I feel so drained?"

Suddenly, Alexander bit his wrist. I tried to stop him, but I failed miserably. "What are you doing?"

He held his wrist close to my lips. "Drink."

"What?" I spluttered incredulously.

"Drink," he repeated, this time more fiercely.

"Why?" I asked, bewildered at what was going on. Alexander's blood was running down his arm now as he continued to hold his try and offer me his wrist.

"Do you want to die, Aurora?"

I blinked stupidly. "Not really. I mean, not now ..."

"Then drink!"

"Why?" I asked again.

"I'm not of this world, Aurora. I'm not living or dead. I'm damned eternally. I can't die. I'm immortal. You will become one of me, Aurora. You'll become like me if you drink my blood. You will never die, never get sick. But you will die if you just sit there asking stupid questions."

It suddenly clicked. Vampire. But how? Vampires aren't real. At least, not in my world. But, how did I know that I wasn't in a different world?

I thought about it and decided that I liked Alexander's world--wherever, or whatever, it might be--better than the one I had lived in previously. And no one would notice me not aging except for Alexander, so why shouldn't I become like him? And he seemed so lonely when I met him, and now he seemed so desperate for me to comply.

Tentatively, I took his wrist and pulled it closer to my lips. I let the blood flow into my mouth. I liked the taste of Alexander's blood. It was warm and sweet--just like his personality.

When I felt I had had enough to sustain me, I let go of Alexander's wrist. He seemed relieved. "Merci, Aurora."

"Why didn't your wound heal instantly before?" I asked, using what little knowledge I had of vampires.

"Because I didn't want it to. Aurora, are you sure you're okay with what you are now?"

I nodded. "Of course. If I weren't I wouldn't have done it."

"You have immortality, now, Aurora."

"I know."

"I'm sorry I did it Aurora. I couldn't help myself."

"No, I like it, don't worry. I won't miss anyone from my past life. But, I have one favor."

"What is it?"

"Don't call me Aurora anymore. The name doesn't really suit me anymore."

"Well, what would you like me to call you, then?"


Alexander chuckled. "It means 'reborn' in French. Or 'come back to life.'"

I smiled deviously. "Exactly."

Alexander smiled back. "Yes, I think that fits much better. So, Renée, I think you should get some more rest. But I'll still be here, don't worry. Nous avons pour toujours ensemble maintenant."

I smiled and slowly closed my eyes. Pour toujours, I thought, before drifting off into the nothingness of slumber.


~Enjoy your meal: Bon appétit
~Thank you: Merci
~We have forever together now: Nous avons pour toujours ensemble maintenant
~Forever: Pour toujours

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Nothing important...
Well, I got my short story done and turned in for English. Now I just have to do my book report... but, since I don't really have anything else to talk about, I'm going to share my story with you! ^_^ w00t. It's long, so I'm posting it in a different post.
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Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Wow, you get to hear about my day again!
It was rather odd today... Rachel called me 'Morgan'. I don't know why... she told me I sounded like Morgan. "How do I sound like Morgan?" I asked Jazzy. And she said, "You just do. Trust me." Or something to that extent. Gah, such a Jazzy thing to say.

I told this to Morgan, and she was just as confused. *shrug*

Today was extremely boring, other than that part of my day.

I read the fifth chapter of KAMUI, though. And it was good! Bwahaha! I showed Morgan the picture of Atsuma, and this was her response: "Sexy...bish..." ^_^ And then her fangirl instincts made her also say: "~drool~"

Aaah, Atsuma IS sexy. And so is Shui. And so are all the other guys in the freaking manga! But, you probably have no idea who I'm talking about unless you've READ it, too, which I'm pretty sure none of you (who am I even talking to?) have.

Anyway... I got out of playing me Etude for Mr. Doby today coz he couldn't meet with us today to practice. Bwahaha! A whole 'nother week to practice!!

*sigh* I don't wanna work on my short story for English. Bah. And I don't really want to work on my HP fic OR my YGO fic. In fact, I don't want to do much of ANY writing. But, I guess I HAVE to write my short story, since I don't want to continue to fail the class (I've got a 64 right now, only coz I haven't turned in a freaking progress report - bah!). Well, I suppose I shall go work on my story.

Bah. Until tomorrow sometime...

Ja ne!

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