Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Breath......annnnnnd.......*squeal*
Please find a ribbon and paste it into your profile!!!



So you know how I was looking around for that lullaby? I have no idea how she did it, but my friend found it online for me! C.D and all!!! And with like, no information nor knowing what the song really was! It was ridiculously crazy, but I was so happy I was crying!
See, when I was little...how to explain this.
Who's got my house number? Sareena? No one call the cops. O_o
Anyways, my father is abusive. He left 7 years ago and drama. Drama. Drama. Moved in with another woman, never got a divorce with my mom, and would come over to our house and beat me. So, obviously I'd get upset...and I was younger then so I listened to bubbly music, and there was a lullaby that would make me happy :3 The one I was looking for!
Well, even though the divorce is now finalized (As of 8/16/08) Dad still seems to show up and beat us. Mom just tells me to "hang in there" untill we can move. I kinda don't want to do either. I want to cry and curse and through a fit and beable to blame someone for all the dang crap in my life. But there isn't anyone to blame.
Not for the abuse, not for my out-of-control Diabetes, no one. And I can't cry and lecture and vent. It's just not possible.
For some reason, lately school has become difficult for me too. I just don't understand math anymore, and Science is hard to keep up with because I'm absent so much (hense, my out of control Diabetes). Then, if one thing goes wrong in life, everthing else seems to fall back down on me and I get stressed and over flow like that.
Was it two or three summers ago where I almost died in the PHX hospital? I can't seem to remember a basic thing like that. I think it was two....but it seems like three...anyhow!

I may do a different theme soon. I know I seem to change them alot, but I'm in the mood for something a little softer. *stretches*

LOL, real quick. My friend was over here, and read my last post, ect. And said, "Rachel? WTF a kiss?" But yep. LOL And it made me remember, I had this friend once, and they were tlaking about bowling. Well, I've never been bowling, and I told him that, and he replied: "Never been bowling? Rachel! That's like never being kissed!" And, hah, I was like "I never have been" LOL He wasn't referring to a family kiss, but yeah...IDK for a brief moment I thought that was funny.

And BTW, I don't usually go on it but a couple times a month, but check out my MySpace page sometime? ~**CLICKY THE PICKY**~




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