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Friday, January 19, 2007

...
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-

Thought I would do this, just for some info...

~Deep Questions That Make You Think~Mostly Original~81 Questions
Random/Basic
Name: Daniel.
Nickname: Dany, Danizzle, Danimal.
Best memory: Playing in that jam band with Travbisco and Jizzstain...
Worst memory: Moving away from Alaska.
Best dream: Can't really remember.
Worst nightmare: Can't really remember.
Weaknesses: Insecurity and uncertainty.
Strengths: Humor and common sense.
Anyone have the same birthday as you?: Yeah, but I don't know them very well.
Would you...
die for a friend?: Yes.
die for your crush/bf/gf?: Yes.
die for your family?: Yes. Besides my Biological father.
ever kill yourself?: Maybe, to be honest. Thought about it.
Kill someone else?: Yes, if the situation needs me to.
If you had to choose- save your cat or save your enemy?: I don't have a cat, so my enemy. After all, we're all human.
rather freeze or burn to death?: Freeze, when you freeze you get to a induce euphoria.
admit you love someone?: I do...But they're probably scared that I do love them still.
break the law or lie to save a friend?: Yes on both.
Have you ever...
cut yourself?: Yes. On accident and on purpose.
been in love?: Yes.
thought about suicide?: Yes.
hated someone so much you thought you would really kill them?: Yes, a very vendicted person.
starved yourself?: I have, but not by my own will.
forced yourself to cry?: Yes, got me out of detention.
forced yourself to throw up?: Yes, got me out of work. Ha ha.
betrayed a friend?: Yes, but it was important, I would of been even a worse friend if I didn't do so.
hurt someone else so you would feel better about yourself?: Younger yes, I was a punk ass.
Which is worse?
your friend dying or your parent dying: Depends on the level of friendship, but both are tragic.
losing all your old memories or never being able to make new ones: Being able not to make new ones, after all change and the future is what we thrive on.
being rejected by someone you love or having your feelings returned only...: Being rejected, you respect someone to the point you love them, then to have them reject you is a slap in the face.
to be dumped a month later:
being raped or willingly having sex and later regretting it: Being Raped, it's tramautrizing. It's just not right.
having no emotions or only being happy once every couple of months: Having no emotions, we be living if you can't feel.
losing all your friends on earth or never having found God: I'm agnostic, so can't really answer that.
being dumped or dumping someone: Dumping someone, it's hard to explain why you don't like this person anymore.
falling in love with an anime character or falling in love with a celebrity: Anime, at leaste with a celebrity they're 'real'. But I must admit, I like some anime characters.
a friend moving away or losing touch with a friend who lives right near you: Losing touch, there's something wrong with that.
Dreams
What is your dream in life?: To live a nice, normal life and raise a family.
Do you have insomnia?: At times yeah.
Do you often wake up in the middle of the night after a bad dream?: I do, then I never want to sleep.
Do you get deja vu?: At times yeah.
Did you ever have a dream that came true?: No, but I felt like it did.
What about a nightmare?: No, my nightmares are like sci-fi movies.
Did you ever have a realistic dream that truly scared you?: Yes, yes I have them often.
Do you daydream?: Yes, when I'm bored.
Have you ever dreamed you were falling?: Yes, then I would kick and wake myself up.
Fears
Greatest fears: living and dying alone.
What are you not afraid of at all?: Being shot.
Name a weird phobia you have.: Afraid of life...or something like so.
Has your fear ever come true?: In a way, yeah.
Is your fear a common fear?: Yeah, it's called...don't know.
Any particular reason for the fear?: Yeah, uncertainty.
Does it ever control your life?: Yes.
Have you had nightmares about the fear?: Yes.
Are you more afraid of rejection or failure?: Both.
The Past
Most missed memory: Jamming with Travbisco and Jizzstain.
How have your feelings changed throughout your life?: I feel wiser and more patient. I feel like I understand things a lot more.
First memory: Cutting my finger on a Coke can.
Happiest childhood memory: Playing with Alexis.
Saddest childhood memory: When Alexis's mother passed away and she had to move to her grandmother's.
What was your first word?: Don't know...Probably something in Korean.
First friend?: Alexis.
First crush?: Alexis.
First love?: Brandi.
What would you do if...
your best friend died because of you?: Blame myself for my whole life.
your true love moved out of the country?: Promise to keep in touch and visit.
your friend gave you the choice of cheating on the really tough math final?: I would probably cheat, I need the grade.
a friend offered you drugs or alcohol?: Alcohol rather than drugs.
a friend of the same gender told you they were gay and asked you out?: I would tell them, I'm flattered but I'm not like that...and say we can still be friends.
your bf/gf asked you to have sex with them?: Make it something special, not push it and just be patient.
you were sexually abused?: Tell someone.
you were betrayed by someone you trusted and cared about?: Hold a grudge.
you found out your friend wanted to die?: I won't get in the way of what they want, that's selfish, but definitely make sure it's what they really need.
Final Thoughts
Are you saved?: I believe not. When I find out, I'll accept him.
Do you believe in God?: I'm agnostic.
Why or why not?: I was raised as a baptist and yet, I believe science as well.
Are you depressed or sad all the time?: Not all the time, I just feel like it supposed to be better than this.
What are you hoping for in the future?: Get to where I want to be in life.
What makes you happy?: Family, friends and Molly!
What makes you sad?: Family, friends and insecurities.
Do you believe in the Bible?: I believe what seems to be true.
Why or why not?: I'm agnostic.
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Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Monday, December 25, 2006

Another and another...
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-

Another christmas not celebrated. My parents are going to my grandparents...

I don't wanna go, I didn't buy presents and I hate exchanging them.

So, it's another christmas worth spending alone.

For those who are celebrating, have a merry christmas and I hope you get what you want.

Now, I'm off to get some old fashion Egg Nog with some alcohol in it. The authentic stuff is always better than the store bought crap.

Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Friday, December 22, 2006

Oh, please kill me quick.
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-
Pulling the same shit is dumb, and yet I do it.

So, I'm back where I started from. If I said I hated people, I would be lying. After, I am a person as well.

It's a situation that's got me scratching my head, and right now, it's not worth mentioning about. It's a dilemma that's for sure.

Oh, please kill me quick...

note: I decided to get drunk on christmas, considering I'm not doing anything.
Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Wednesday, December 13, 2006

What is life without DEATH?-
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-
Referring to my last post, in which no one read. And I'm somewhat alluded to that fact. And serioulsy, doubt any subsequential "friends" or people will read this one.

But to the last post dismay, and all of it's inspiration. I'm still very, very, very mental ill. Well, not "ill" persay...more, "distrought". My typing and spelling abilities are shotty at best, after all it is 3:32 in the morning. Can't find myself some sleep, so I'm variously slamming away at my keyboard. I hope I'm being coherrent enough for the people who decided to read this. Like I said, I doubt readers are going to be bounding in their opinions on this. I have no hope, and I really don't care for confidence. Hell, to me that's what gets you killed. After all, you feel like you have something...That something, is what you're gonna loose. With more confidence, you take more risks and bound to encounter lose.

I've been here for awhile. Over three years. I made a lot of friends. But through it all, I think I screwed most of thoes relationships up. For those who remain around here since then, I know they don't "hate" me. But it's not like we're chums again. No one is mean, no one insults. We're casual, just passing each other by but not even acknowledging each others presence. It's a taunting reminder of just how idiotic, selfish and niave I was. Often, I wish I could go back in time and stop the words I've said wrong and say the words I shoulf of said. But what can you say? The past is the preset of the future, and the future is meant to be this way. But there are variables that can change everything...It's hard to know, if you made the right choice...or did the right thing. Live with what you did, done and said. I guess. I miss Molletta and Mireiyu. I talked to Molly two nights ago, it was short. We don't have a lot to talk about...but we just been out of the loop for awhile. Linda (Mireiyu), I haven't talked to her since over a year ago. And I hope she's doing well.

Everything that has happened between certain people around here...was my fault. I only brought upon myself and what has happened was the result. It's easier to blame yourself than others...no bickering, no nothing. And I'll accept the fact I'm just a jackass cause of it.

So, clean cut...severed. I blame myself, but I don't care anymore. I don't hold myself under cause of it anymore. What I did was a result of someone weak...I'm not exactly strong now, but I've learned a thing or two since.

Goodbye...to my regrets to the has-been-friends and the killing memories.

SO....

To be honest, I hate Christmas with a fiery passion. If there's something I have to loathe and it's not a person or a thing. The first thing is gonna be Christmas and the second, is gonna be school spirit. Oh, boy I hate school spirit. Well, anyway. I hate christmas even more than before, since my job requires me to work more hours and stay later due to this crappy ass holiday. Damn, you Christmas...

Today was my day off, I did nothing but eat and sleep. Oh, yeah and watch tons of TV. What a waste, but the day was crappy anyway. It was pouring rain all day. So I was compelled to run outside and get in the car for a nice ride.

Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Thursday, December 7, 2006

   -Spitting Image Of Blanke-
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-
Crooked Lines...

I had the notion to fall between guided lines and be in cased in perfect painted white rows of symmetrical horizons refined. I had the ideal to become the inprisonment of self propelled thought drapped along surfaces that in darkest terms in the proverbal of one's bane.

I had the time to waste the hand and it's counterpart wasting itself in the expense of it wasting mine. I had the action to converge it all and let bliss be the reward, honestly creates pipe dreams and modesty has stranded my on the island of never ending self sacrifice.

This won't end the beginning and there is not beginning to the end, I'll find this to be my habit and never let it see the light day.

---------------------------------------------

I'm in a self perputual state of self loathing, self confidence, self pity and anti selfesteem.

Whatever happen to us, to you, to me...to everyone. Life takes it's tolls and we have scars to bare, scars to share. And seeing my scars again in the mirror, I wonder, life is vain and inconsiderate. That a person much like myself is worth the time, the sacrifice, the effort. So, I try so hard to keep this going. And motion sets effect of a depression that acts of war and chaos. I shake my head, trying to clean the helmet of it all. To no preveal, I'm lose again. Weakness is not word, it's a person...I'm just the spitting image of "insert"...I want to cry, kick and scream. I want to stab, mane and kill. Tear off, strip and rip apart.

The human face isn't beauty, armor or statue of decadence.

It's an abomanation.

I would sure love the accompany of others right now...bleek as I am now, I want to carry on a uplifting conversation.

Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Wednesday, November 15, 2006

And yet again.
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-
I recieved my Fender Jazz Bass about a month ago.

Oh, it's a beauty...And yes, I do have pics...glorious, beautiful and ravishing pics.

My jazz next to my Ibanez SoundGear SRX300 with Active P-ups.

Body of my jazz still has the Fender spec sticker and the original plastic cover over the pickguard.

A shot of the jazz's headstock sporting the long-blood line Fender logo that's been seen through generations and generations. Oh, and in the background is the show Scrubs, one of my favorite shows.

Body of my Ibanez, you can't see it but the paint finish has sparkles in it kinda, it's Pewter black. Show off the massive active pick ups with huge pole mags. No strings, I need to get some new strings.

Headstock of my Ibanez as you can guess. Very cool, the black matches the body. The heart was given to me by Lacey on Valentine's day. Olivia broke up with me and I felt less than receptive, so Lacey came by and started sticking all these hearts on me and my stuff...telling me to cheer me up.

Just bought a Badass II bridge from ebay it should come soon, can't wait till drop that on my Fender...It's gonna sound nice, plus I need to replace the pickups...thinking quarter pounder s. duncans...

Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Wednesday, October 25, 2006

I always say it, but I never do it...
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-
What do I always say, but never do...

Update. I always say I'm gonna update, but then I just toss aside and up never really doing it. And it's not because I'm busy. It's because in some little way I really don't care and the fact I'm lazy. Well, the care part it's not a huge deal if I don't update. It's not like I'm in a race to be number one here. The highest I ever got was number five. But that was about two years ago, then I fell into a rut.

I recieved my Fender Jazz Bass about a week and two days ago...

Oh, it's a beauty...And yes, I do have pics...glorious, beautiful and ravishing pics.

My jazz next to my Ibanez SoundGear SRX300 with Active P-ups.

Body of my jazz still has the Fender spec sticker and the original plastic cover over the pickguard.

A shot of the jazz's headstock sporting the long-blood line Fender logo that's been seen through generations and generations. Oh, and in the background is the show Scrubs, one of my favorite shows.

Body of my Ibanez, you can't see it but the paint finish has sparkles in it kinda, it's Pewter black. Show off the massive active pick ups with huge pole mags. No strings, I need to get some new strings.

Headstock of my Ibanez as you can guess. Very cool, the black matches the body. The heart was given to me by Lacey on Valentine's day. Olivia broke up with me and I felt less than receptive, so Lacey came by and started sticking all these hearts on me and my stuff...telling me to cheer me up.

That's all for now, I suppose. Oh, yeah, getting matching black strap locks for my Fender.

Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Monday, October 16, 2006

What's new, eyes of blue?...
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-

So, what has been going on? Seriously, all these events. I mean there was the shooting at Bailey, CO and then, almost the same scenerio in Pennsylvania with the Amish school girls, the plane crash in NY involving the Yankee's pither and now, a huge eartquake in Hawaii.

These past two months have changed a lot of things, and with all that it seems people either take things too serious or not serious enough.

Personally, I feel like this is all bullshit and now since every single fucking thing seems to phase us. Either not caring or over caring. The world is hard, and for me to say that is shit considering I haven't confronted it all yet. But I can see it with plain view a mile away and now I'm trying to prepare for the harshness it's gonna bring.

People need to get a better grip on life, and if you can't, sorry but you're gonna die...

Most people will do what they need to do to survive. And if you can't realize you need to do the same, you're going to feel the world just swallow you up and your life is gonna be meaningless.

It's harsh, so is life...what's better me telling you before hand or saying I told you so after it's all over?

NEWS ON ME...

I tracked down the shipment of my bass. It's in transit and will arrive at my home around the seventeenth. I hope it comes on time, like the UPS site said. And I hope It'll come in perfect shape. I don't want to send it back...

I lost five pounds on being on a diet for only two days. Well, the thing that really helps is the extreme work out regiment I've been putting myself. It's fucking hell, but it's worth it all. I still need to go to GNC and get some Diet Suppliments.

Man, I miss being around girls. At school, I was surrounded with good looking girls. The were all my friends, and at lunch we would all sit together in the same booth and just talk. Even though, I rarely talked, I had my moments I guess. Not to mention, I went to prom with one of those girls. Her name is Lacey, a very awesome person, my first friend here...But prom sucked...she was sick and I felt depressed, cause I felt like a bad prom date...so I spent alot of the night trying to find alcohol and get myself plastered. I found none, so I went straight to the coke and then worked my way to the bottle water. Nice. It was my first highschool dance, and all in all it was really crappy. But what can you aspect from the schoolboard.

This is long enough, and it's one a.m. So good morning/night.

Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Thursday, October 12, 2006

   It's true, I'm a hateful person. And it never ends.
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-
Like the title? I know you do.

Changed the song to Under Pressure covered by The Blood Brothers. Originally done by Queen and David Bowie.

So, what's new? Lets see...

My bass should get shipped off today. I had to call the guy up and talk to him, he wasn't answering any of my goddamn emails. So, I took it upon myself and cast the first stone on communication.

Um, work is alright. I can see it's starting to get hectic due to the holiday season, especially christmas. And everyone wants that TMX Tickle Me Elmo. Yeah, sorry but if you come around five p.m. looking for one...Odds are you're not going to find any.

Oh, that reminds me. Some a-hole coworker complained about me to my boss. The funny thing was I was right about the matter and nothing was push against me.

I got my computer fixed, I did it myself. Which is awesome. Cause for a moment, I thought I would of have to take it in and pay ninety to hundred something just to get the operating system reloaded.

Man, I'm insanely discruntled right now. I really do hate people. People from this dumb-ass state. I can't wait till I get then enough efficent funds to get my ass out of this hell hole.

I realize, Olivia is waiting for me in Alaska. It feels good that someone cares whether you're there or not. I talked to her a couple days ago and the first thing she said when she picked up the phone was, "Daniel, I've missed you..."

Well, I'm done this is long enough.

Note: Almost forgot, I deleted a lot of people from my friend's list. Think of it as Fall Cleaning.
Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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Thursday, October 5, 2006

   Again, it never flees.
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-Backroom--Guestbook--P.M. Me--Add Me--Art-
I didn't win the bid for that bass. Someone did one of those last minute "wait, till it's alwmost over then screw the honest person" things. So I didn't win. But I did bid on another bass. The same type different year, Fender Jass bass black finish. So, that cost me three hundred and thirty nine dollars.

I spent over five hundred bucks yesterday, that's the most I ever spent of my own money. I wrote a two hundred dollar check towards my IRA, then bought that bass.

I'm scared though, the seller of the bass won't answere my e-mails. I might have to withdrawl. But I already sent payment...

I have to work today, but tomorrow's payday and my check should be a good amount of money. Since, I worked extra days and some added on hours to days I've worked.

They got me working a lot more now, which sucks...I have no time for myself anymore.

But I do need the cash.

Contact me: Msn: slitwristtheory_02@hotmail.com Aim: safetydate@aol.com Myspace: myspace.com/minniewinnie

Song: Hands In The Sky(Big shot). By: Straylight Run.

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