Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Ughn...

Today was Exam Day #1, and I did excellent! ^_^
I took my time, answered carefully, and I'm pretty sure I passed.

We took the English exam first. I think I was the last one who finished, but that's okay.

In Computer Lit. we took the exam online TechConnect, and I made 83%, though, since she said that we could use our Master Cards, which we gained throughout the second semester, culd help us out with our score. Since I had 11 of them, I'm thinking my score may be raised to a 91. ^_^

Oi...then I got SERIOUSLY sick. ><
Okay, I'll go into details; it was a very painful stomach ache, that came and receded in waves. I was typing freely in Mavis Beacon, when my stomach seemed to twist (that's what it felt like), and I felt really hot. Even after I took off my sweater and the air conditioner was on, I still felt seriously ill. So, I asked mrs. betke if I could go to the nurse's office, since I was becoming dizzy with pain.
On the way down to the nurse's office, I was VERY close to vomiting right there. O_O
When I got to the nurse, I couldn't speak, only gasp; stupid, I know, but I felt I was going to puke right there, and I was trembling so badly, oh man...
The nurse sent me to the bathroom, and I saw destini (a girl in our English class), and she asked me if I was sick, and I whispered that I was. Strange enough, I could't vomit right there in the bathroom, even though I wanted to, so that the pain would go away. It actually did go away, magically. O_O
Even though I told the nurse it was a false alarm right there, I still had terrible stomach pains throughout 7th period, homeroom, and FISH/lunch. Finally, I forced myself to return to the nurse's office to ask for a TUMS. THAT worked!

Anyway, despite me being sick most of FISH, I was able to listen to mrs. holland speak to us, that no matter how we felt about ourselves, Jesus would alwyas loe us, no matter what. She gave a us a sheet of paper, that could remind us who were are, a card with a brilliant story that can help us, and a small purple ribbon to attach to our clothing, to show that we are the children of the true King. ^_^

I'm wearing mine right now.

I was actually able to eat three pieces of pizza (the temptation was just too much, I guess; and a small piece of cookie cake. Mmmm...so good. ^_^)

In American History, we took our exam--and guess what? I made a 99! XD
I only missed one question! When I told my parents, they were very pleased. Of course, we got out early, and there's always something I will love about Exam Days, and the bus. When you get on the bus when you take mid-terms or finals, there will be absolutely NO little annoying kids fillinf up most of the bus; plus, you get to sit wherever you want. For exam days, I enjoy sitting up at the front of the bus, near the driver. Excellent view, by the way. ^_^

We also got to see Shrek 3, and it was really funny, though it seemed shortm somehow. Heh heh...two Monty Python actors played their characters: John Cleese, and Eric Idle. :P

BTW, Kirby, I don't think I will able to print out the fanfic I've found, that I've been putting up. But I'll give you the link to it, so you can take your time reading it there, okay?

The link is: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2704848/1/



That's it for now. See you guys...

Chapter 4

For the nth time Kakashi wanted to stuff that greasy haired git’s head down the nearest cauldron; preferably the Longbottom boy’s cauldron. Upon first seeing the Potions Master, Kakashi was given the image of a combination between an Uchiha (bloody gits) and a slimy newt. Upon mentally imagining such an image, Kakashi’s shoulders shook in silent laughter. The overgrown bat that was Snape glared at him for a moment before telling the Potter boy to skin something.

“Orange, Longbottom. Orange.” Said Snape, ladling the potion up and letting it splash down to show everyone. While Kakashi himself was indifferent to Snape’s glares, the aura of loathing the man sent his way caused the unfortunate Longbottom child to assume the worst and wilt like a cut flower. It was Kakashi being glared at after all.

“Tell me, boy, does anything penetrate that thick skull of yours? Didn’t you hear me say, quite clearly, that only one rat spleen was needed? Didn’t I state plainly that a dash of leech juice would suffice? What do I have to do to make you understand, Longbottom?” Snape snapped, glaring at the entire class, but most of his glare lingered on the silver-haired ANBU. It seemed that this man, or was it a kid, was impervious to all of Snape’s attempts of loathing. It nearly drove the man mad.

The guard had been standing nearby, hands in his pockets as always. While Snape had heard from the other House heads that they had their own guards with their funny quirks, Snape felt that the Potter brat’s House guard was the worst of them all.

He was flippant and ignored Snape’s clear superiority, he caught the students’ attention when they were supposed to be studying and in turn, they disregarded Snape completely. Snape was not used to being part of the wallpaper. He found it most annoying, so much that he wanted to rip off that mask and wipe off that clear smirk off the man’s face with Avada Kedavra.

Impudent little brat. Why he’d bet that the annoying guard was younger than him, quite possibly a child. Such disrespect was inconceivable. How dare he treat the teacher with disrespect? He was only a guard!

The Longbottom boy was pink, trembling and on the verge of tears. Kakashi felt that it was quite unfair. So far, the Longbottom boy had tried so hard. Kakashi waited until Snape turned his back somewhere else, then, without thinking, he stepped up to the Longbottom boy and put one hand on his shoulder.

Instead of getting the usual result of such a gesture (a small smile) the Longbottom boy simply froze up and stared at Kakashi in horror. The ANBU thought it best to retreat; withdrawing the supposed comfort he was offering the Longbottom boy.

It would not be proper. He was ANBU. He was a guard, nothing more and nothing less.

“Did you see that? The guard actually put a hand on Neville’s shoulder.” Ron spoke rather loudly. Harry nudged him sharply. The said guard was behind them; he was staring at Ron.

Ron’s eyes widened, and he quickly snapped his mouth shut.

Kakashi tilted his head, seemingly amused at the boy’s attempt to take back what he said.

Lupin-san was late, like Yondaime-sensei before. Kakashi used to count how many minutes he was late, while Obito was busy making bets with Kakashi, who really didn’t care, how much more minutes their sensei would be late while Rin would only cross her arms and roll her eyes upward with a sigh.

Kakashi had always won in those bets. Usually Obito would be too busy challenging Kakashi with several bets while the silver haired ninja would already see their sensei rushing from a short distance away.

Those were happy times then. Sensei was always telling Kakashi to lighten up, to act like his age. Obito would always try to see what was under his mask and Rin would only laugh…

No. Don’t think of it anymore. They’re all dead.

And then the war came. The Academy’s standards were lowered, to allow more children to become child soldiers. Sensei’s Team 7 was sent out on missions, barely getting any rest. Many, many times, they were almost killed…

Obito was crushed under a rock, killed by a Stone Nin’s Jutsu…
He had lost one precious person in that gruesome war. Rin was never the same again. She would only rarely smile, much less laugh. Kakashi would spend most, if not all of his time at the Memorial Stone, buried deep in guilt. Sensei was selected as Hokage and he became distant, too busy with the village’s problems to even recognize his own students’ symptoms of depression.

Then Kyuubi attacked. Rin was sent immediately to heal everyone injured, hands covered in blood. Sensei was cramming for that specific Jutsu, throwing valuable books aside haphazardly. Kakashi was busy distracting Kyuubi, barely making it in time to dodge a blow from one of the nine tails the Kyuubi had…

Rin was smashed against a building, thrown there by one of Kyuubi’s tails…

Sensei was falling from his summon’s back, soul consumed by his own Jutsu…

He had lost two precious people in that savage attack. There was no more Rin to comfort him, to tell him that he was only human when he failed to complete a mission. There was no more Sensei to remind him, to tell him that he didn’t need to be the perfect shinobi when he was sent to the hospital on the cause of exhaustion. Kakashi would spend his mornings with Obito, his afternoons with Rin and his evenings with Sensei.

He was barely healing from Sensei and Rin’s death when they asked him to join ANBU, to throw his soul away and become a lifeless shinobi tool, built for the kill.

He accepted.

Why would he show emotion now? He was getting soft, comforting the Longbottom boy.

He was jerked out of his haunted musings by Lupin-san’s arrival. The man eyed him warily before turning to the class. He was shabby, as it was, and he seemed a little healthier.

“Good afternoon.” He began. “Bring out your wands and follow me. Today’s lesson will be a practical one.”

Kakashi blinked in surprise. In all the lessons he had ever been, following the Potter brat, he had only stayed in the classroom. A new location, possibly outside, meant that he would have to put on extra effort to protect the Potter boy.

Kakashi scowled, but made no noise. He simply nodded and followed them out.

Kakashi had decided long ago that he never did like Peeves. The troublesome poltergeist tried to play a prank on him the moment he entered Hogwarts. Kakashi was walking with Hagrid-san when the troublesome thing arrived.

“What’s this? A stranger in Hogwarts? Not an ickle firstie?” The poltergeist laughed, throwing a water balloon up and down. Kakashi narrowed his eyes. Hagrid-san had wandered off, mumbling something about paintings, leaving Kakashi with Peeves.

“A guard.” Kakashi murmured in reply. This spirit was quite interesting.

Peeves blew a loud wet raspberry. “So what? Ickle, childish guard, go back to your mother. Peevesy here doesn’t care. You kids are all the same.”

Kakashi narrowed his eyes at the insult. He never knew his mother. In some dim memory he knew he had, he had asked his father where was his mother.

Hatake Sakumo had simply ruffled Kakashi’s silver hair and told him gruffly to go to bed, eyes distracted, looking at something that Kakashi didn’t know.

“I don’t have a mother.” Kakashi murmured in a distracted way. “I never knew her.”

Peeves didn’t seem to understand Kakashi’s tone as he said it; he stared at Kakashi from between his legs. “Ickle, ickle guard. Coming to a wizard school, and yet not a wizard. Useless!” He cackled as he flung the balloon at Kakashi.

By instinct, Kakashi caught the balloon and was mildly surprised when it burst, spilling water everywhere.

Peeves cackled, wiggling his toes as he took out another water balloon from somewhere and threw it at Kakashi. The ANBU simply sidestepped as he narrowed his eyes at the poltergeist.

“Don’t you have anything else to do?” Kakashi asked, irritated.

Peeves cackled again. “No, why would I find something else to do? This is FUN!” At the word, he flung more water balloons at the ANBU, breaking out into song.

Kakashi narrowed his eyes again. He now had a good reason to Raikiri the poltergeist’s ass. Performing the seals, lighting burst from Kakashi’s gloved hand. Peeves stopped singing.

‘What’s this? Ickle guard can do this?” Peeves asked, eyes widening. “This shiny, white light?”

Shiny white light indeed. Kakashi thought morbidly, grinning. Let’s see how you do…

Kakashi thrust his hand through Peeve’s body, Raikiri easily cutting through the mist that made up Peeve’s corporeal form.

“Loony, loopy Lupin! Loony, loopy Lupin!” Peeves sang, doing a cartwheel.

“This is a useful little spell,” Lupin-san told the class. Kakashi opened his Sharingan, taking note of everything. “Please watch closely.”

Lupin-san raised his wand to shoulder height and pointed at Peeves. The result was a screeching, cursing Peeves retreating and a piece of bubblegum, which Peeves had used to try and block a keyhole to one of the caretaker’s closets, firmly lodged on the wall.

The Sharingan had copied the spell. Kakashi closed Obito’s eye and followed the class as they walked towards the staff room.

Snape the overgrown bat was there again, and Kakashi automatically scowled in dislike. The man spoke of Longbottom, and Lupin-san’s reply seemed to infuriate the greasy haired git. He left in a huff, glaring at Kakashi for a few moments before leaving.

The wardrobe wobbled, banging off the wall. Kakashi’s hand was automatically hovering near his kunai pouch. A few others leapt back in alarm.

“Nothing to worry.” Lupin-san spoke. “There’s a boggart in there.” He seemed calm, but even his calm features did nothing to remove Kakashi’s worry.

A boggart? What was a boggart? It didn’t sound like a Bijouu name, but still…

Two Gryffindors, one was the Longbottom boy, still seemed worried. Lupin-san told them of boggarts, how the things liked dark spaces. Kakashi scowled in intense dislike as the brown haired girl told them that the boggarts were shape shifters, and that they took form of what scared them most. Potter boy answered the next question, that they were in large numbers and therefore, the thing would be confused on what form to use.

Kakashi scowled even more at the solution to a boggart. Laughter. Kakashi rarely, if ever, laughed. When he did, it was only a small snicker. Never a fully-fledged laugh like what Sensei used to do.

Lupin-san was giving instructions, and he spoke of the spell-word that would force the boggart into a form that was funny.

Kakashi couldn’t think of anything remotely funny, even without the boggart.

The Longbottom boy admitted he was afraid of Snape. Kakashi could see why. Lupin-san spoke of more instructions and then told everyone else to back off. Kakashi did so, and was staring at the wardrobe.

Lupin-san counted to three, and then the wardrobe burst open, Snape stepped forward, scowling.

“R---r----riddikulus!” Longbottom squeaked.

Kakashi almost laughed. Almost. ANBU weren’t supposed to laugh. The overgrown bat was dressed in the most absurd clothing he had ever seen. The only emotion Kakashi let everyone else see was his shaking shoulders.

Students stepped forward, each trying the spell on the boggart’s ever changing form. It wasn’t until Lupin-san’s boggart whizzed around the room as a balloon that Kakashi realized everything wasn’t funny anymore.

The boggart landed right in front of the ANBU, and Kakashi, for all his control, almost broke down right in front of everyone.

The boggart turned into one of his fever-induced dreams. The dreams, which had been so farfetched, had come back to haunt him. He felt alive, seeing them all.

There in front of him were Sensei, Rin and Obito, all three alive and smiling at him, figments of the past long sealed. Obito was grinning, fingering the goggles over his eyes. Sensei was smiling, ruffling Obito’s head. Rin was laughing, shining eyes staring at him. Kakashi almost allowed himself a smile as he reached out to them.

And then…he died again. The boggart had turned into his worst nightmare. His heart crumbled into useless dust. His knees gave way as the boggart gave him his worst fear.

Obito suddenly fell down, blood spilling, as his body, even without the boulder, seemed to react to pressure on his right side. Several people screamed. Kakashi choked, his hand falling down, palm hitting the floor.

Rin was screaming as she fell down too, her body was burning, flesh crinkling into black as invisible flames burned her alive, her spilled blood boiling on the floor. More people were yelling. Kakashi only looked on, hands curling into fists.

And Sensei…Sensei simply dropped dead; his body hitting the wooden floor with such a solid sound that Kakashi felt it was that moment all over again.

At that moment, Kakashi broke. He simply screamed. He screamed until his throat was raw. He ignored Lupin-san, ignored everyone else. The man was nudging him, telling him it wasn’t real. Kakashi’s mind knew it wasn’t real, that it was only an illusion, but his heart argued in turn.

He missed them, all three of them. He missed Obito, for his unfailing humor and loyalty, Rin, for her patience and kindness, and Sensei, for his endless wisdom and his support.

He missed them all. His heart was still too young to let go of their memories. He felt dead again, a ruthless, mindless and emotionless shinobi tool. He felt like he was when he sold his soul to the ANBU.

Broken. Battered. Scarred. Suicidal. Lifeless.

A simple shinobi tool used to kill.

Crack.

The boggart’s appearance changed, and it was Snape again. Neville spoke the spell-word and the boggart vanished in a puff of misty smoke.

Silence reigned in the room. Most were too shocked by the amount of blood that spilled. Others eyed Kakashi with pity. The Potter boy and his friends were one of the latter. One even put a hand on his shaking shoulder.

Kakashi closed his eyes and stood up.

“I am sorry…” His words were heavy, slurred with newly reawakened grief. “For causing a scene.”


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