Tuesday, July 3, 2007

   im back early
hi everyone.im back early....im still depressed and sick but i decided to come on here and try to visit.i hope kumiko didnt start up anything or leave any mean comments either but i guess you guys know why i dont like her.thank you all for having enough tolerance for her though.

im not suppose to be online actually im suppose to still be in bed but i cant get any sleep T_T.ive been completely restless and my sleep isnt well.i got some new movies and i even bought freedom writers to.

my lil bro is getting on my on my nerves.i wish we werent related *sighs*...oh and i made a poem.i hope you guys like it and i hope its not to depressing...

title- & hearts ; a deep sadness within me & hearts ;

i want to tell him alot of things but most of all i want to tell him i miss him.
my heart is broken,my soul is torn, and all i do is cry night to morn.i can't sleep and i hardly eat.i'm dying inside slowly...
i'm told to get over him and to let everything go but it is not as easy as said just to let you know.
it's hurting me deep inside and i'm starting to show it more...it's killing me to know i won't see him anymore.
now he's gone and all i have left is memorie's.everytime someone calls i'm always wishing it was him...
if only he knew how much pain he put me through who knows what he would do.
maybe he would give me a tight hug or maybe he would be a jerk and just shrug....
thats what i wanted to tell him...it's just that i miss him more everyday!

i know it sucks right?i made it two days ago and i was so close to crying when i made it so i rushed it plus i was outside and i didnt want anyone to see me crying.

also i tryed to make the poem spelling correct and the same for puncutaion.i dont eat as much anymore though.i have to eat sugary food and drink sugary drinks becuase i might have glucose.

everytime im about to shake i always get something with sugar and it works.

my dreams have all been about my crush.also i know i should try to stop thinking for him but i cant.its to hard and i still havent gotten over him.

it was hard to stay off the compt. to since im always on it but i managed by writing and watching movies and stuff.

also thank you all for the nice comments.i appeciate them and im sry if you guys started to wry about me when there were no post at all.

kumiko wont be back on here though and when she said ai in the post she meant me.she calls me ai sometimes for short but seriously my name dosent need to be shortened anymore.

im real tired but i'll make an atempt to visiting you guys.also my parents force me to take cherry medicine!cherry is nasty.

happy early 4th of july to.im still checking my pms though even though kumiko replyed to some of them.

m changing my site and stuff.oh and today i went to the mall and i seen this girl that looked like my crush old gf and she was with this one guy.i haf to take 3 deep breaths becuase anything that reminds me of them...well you know how i get...

also school is almost here since this is my last month of school and i still havent gotten over him.also next year or as you can say when i go back i have to wear ugly school uniform T_T

i hate school uniform its so gay!i want to wear what i want and express myself.its not fair that theyre forcing us to wear what they like.

they say that uniform surveys prove everyone gets along better,behavior is good and that their are less fights but in my opinion uniform dosent have snit to do with any of that.

even my mom said so to.also about that guy at the house thing.i cant belive kumiko called me a liar!i did have a dream that was similar to that.which is real creppy....

his anger probelm ...well even though he has a anger porblem i know alot of you guys are surprised that i still like him but i dont care about his anger issue though.


i knew he had a anger problem even beofre we got introduced to each other.whenever a teacher like was telling him to stop sumthing or w/e he got like extra pissed and slammed stuff into the wall but he never hurt anyone that i know of.

i heard he went to anger management classes to try to calm it down.the main thing is that onetime when he was pissed about something this boy thats in my class who likes me was all like whats up and stuff and then i was like hes pissed so leave him alone dummy but he kept messing with him asking him whats wrong and he gave him a look and he backed down.

i get pissed when people mess with him when hes not in a good mood becuase i know how he feels.when im not in a good mood well mad i perfer to be left alone.

then that time he was all like wtf do you want!thingy i cant blame him that much becuase the girl that lied to him was the one that messed with him and i already immeditely seen he wasnt in a good mood in the first place.

hes extra extra scary when hes not in a good mood so i stay away from him.then his eyes...they were cold as ice creppy cold.you know what i mean though right?


i sure have alot of visiting make ups to fo though 0_o

okay its the end well not without the pics and stuff but heres some questions


~what can i do to help my depression go down?

~was my post boring?

~what are you planning for the 4th of july?

kay.thats all...

icons and pics.pics come with sayings i made up and i will be making ecard some time but not planning on doing so soon.

im just a princess waiting for her prince to come


my eyes are red from the tears i cry.im sick of listening to all your lies


i miss you to much but most of all i miss the hugs becuase those were the only time i got close to you.... (it sucks i know..)


(no quote)


blow a bubble,make a wish,now all i want is a good night kiss...from my crush that is (sucky..)


i was to shy to care but now i regret not being their...


each night is a sleepless one.i feel so incomplete.now all i want is for you to be by my side and protect me through the night...


im so cold.now all i want is to be held by you.


icons

i can relate to every single one






sarcasm...
































well cant relate to this one real well.its just that it reminds me of the time when i gave my s.v.s the poem i wrote and everyone was like you wrote him a poem?! and then the girl who is so obssed with the most popular boy in school said she never even wrote him a poem before.maybe its just becuase she dosent know how to write one.

i mean people judge him before they actually get to know him (referring to crush).like i told the luch lady about how i like him and all that but she was like if i were you i woulndt want to get mixed up with him like hes dangerous or something.i know he has anger issues but theirs nothing actually dangerous about him really.

the only people they i think are dangerous is his friends theyre creppy and i get bad feelings when im around them.also when i went to convient this one guy who looked like who knew my crush but i didnt get that feeling that i got when i was around his friend looked at me like he was surprised to see me or sumthing and he did the same thing as my crushes friend did he made some small talk with the casiher person then left his change and kind of ran out the store.its creppy...

they act like theyre scared of me or sumthing like that.i dont get them.

but yeah people judge my crush before they get to know him well.also i didnt get his number and i asked my friends older bro to ask the boy down the street if he had his number and he said he didnt have it.then asked the girl across the street who had almost everyones number she didnt have it then asked this other boy and he didnt have it either.

my friends older bro (used to like him) was like oh *crushes name* i havent talked to him in a while.

i dont think he moved becuase their car still in their driveway.plus i dont look at the house for long gives me the creeps actually.

i seen that girl also.i dont like her anyways and if hes going with her then he better prepare to get his heart broken yet again.hes always going for the slu**y girls.

plus she had a whole bunch of other boyfriends.
the thing that sucks about me is that i never had one.i had a kid ask me out in kindergarden though but i rejected him....

then the boy that likes me hes ugly in my opinion but the thing that creeps me out is that hes always staring at me.

also now i think about my crush i think he might had some kind of feelings for me.like that time when he was...well from beggining.

i was the first one in line and we were going to english and i seen him and i was shaking from nervousness and so i sat on the table outside in the hallway and i scooted my self as far back as i could.

then he was outside the door looking so cute *sighs*...um..anyways he kept staring at me up and down you know checking me out and then he seen i was looking at him and then he looked away and slighly blushed becuase he face got a little redder.

i never seen him blush before actually only that one time and he was so cute...sry if im annoying you.

then the other girls had to ask for hugs and i didnt but maybe he figured i was to shy to ask and just did that...

also when he was mad he tryed to avoid me unlike the others he took the anger out on them.

thats about it.the only really mean thing he did was when the football went by me that he was playing with i was about to pick it up and give it to him and then he smacked it out my hand and picked it up himself.my hand was sore after that but he didnt hit me as hard as possible..he old gf was their so maybe thats why or maybe not.

but if i see him again and hes with another girl and he sees me im going to walk away from him.
plus it would be rude to hug him infront of another girl especially if their in love with each other....

but yeah i should think about more happier things ne?also i just cant relate to the im over him becuase im not.well this post is to long and i really need to get back to bed so bye *hugs everyone*


happy early 4th of july










Comments (6) | Permalink

Monday, July 2, 2007

tired...
im so tired now.i stayed up like all night trying to visit everyone.i got to a good amount of people but no everyone.also good news to all the people who so dosent like me.ai is coming back in 3 days.so not long and now for three days im not coming back on.

lata ked
Comments (6) | Permalink

Sunday, July 1, 2007

jeez
it seems like you guys so hate me.i mean aiko had like 8 comments on her post and all i get is 3 jeez.am i that annoyng?if you guys dont like me then i'll leave and then aiko can find someone else to take care of her stupid site.today was so fun..okay not really but i go like the cutest clothes ever and we seen alot of hot guys but yeah...also im like real annoyed with having to wirte my name over and over so yeah you guys should already know the diffrence between me and aiko.

lata ked
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Sunday, June 24, 2007

   im scared T_T
im totally freaked out now. I
just seen a baby white spider in my attic and I was on my headphones I threw it down and now its gone but im still freaked I hate spiders. I cant even stare at a picture of them without totally freaking out.

my dad said its not dangerous cause its a baby but if it was bigger I would be screaming my lungs out.


I don�t remember my dream and plus I don�t think I had one cause I went to sleep at 4:32 AM and woke up real early so im still tired but I got to almost everyone site.

thank you for the comments again. My day was kind of boring but today i went to a parade it was so extra boring.

they had a band but it was horrible. I was expecting it to be something like drum line but it wasn�t it was just....

Idk .also they played country music to and I HATE IT a lot. I just ignored it the best I could I got a lot of candy but no hyper ness at all came.

then they were ghost riding the whip hope you know what that means...

but yeah one boy was doing it and when I looked at him I saw my crush then he came closer and then he looked nothing at all like him.

it was weird and I was so close to saying my crush name and I was about to cry to....

it was weird actually. Then they had this beauty prom queen and she looked a lot like my crushes old girlfriend and I was mad and I wanted to leave but I knew I had to wait until it was over.

then their was this boy that was like a stand byer and he looked like my crush a lot. he was real cute also.

then this guy that was their had the same light blue eyes like my crush and sort of reminded me of him and I h ad to look away because I almost got lost in his eyes like I did with my crush.

im thinking of him to much I guess I should try to get over him.

then at the parade a spider with long legs was on my shirt and I freaked and I picked it up and threw it off me and I wanted to scream but their was so many people and it would be way embarrassing.

its legs were all ticklish and disgusting to *cry�s*
im so tired now but of course tmrw I know I have to wake up early. My dad said if I don�t get enough sleep I�ll get sick but if I get to much sleep then I�ll have a heart attack but with him waking me up every second I don�t get any sleep T_T

I haven�t seen him still. He might have moved and that would make me so sad if he did. He doesn�t hang outside the school anymore which is weird in my opinion since he did hang their a lot. im still haven�t got the chance to ask his friends if he has his number and calling other people who might have it

Im still adding onto the mp3 I just haven�t got the chance sry and sry that I haven�t been visiting you guys on a regular basis

Im sick now though. I�ve been coughing a lot lately and it sucks a lot. I wish I could remember my dream now but I cant sry T_T.

I added a new media player if you want the other one back I can put it back up but this one is way better because you can even watch vids and play games on it ^.^

The im sorry song by first lady makes me cry. Its sad.

Stan is a messed up song though but I kind of like it especially the beginning

Also I know how to do that dance to bring that beat back.

I�ve been down lately and not real happy. Its annoying because I always have to hide my tears.
If my parents saw me crying they would be like what�s wrong and bugging me.

I�talking about him so much must really annoy you guys so I�ll stop.

Here�s some pics and quotes

How do I say bye to someone who I never had? Why do tears fall for someone who was never mine? Why is it that I miss someone who I was never with?


Everyone says to give up on you but they don�t see you like I do.


You�re the vision of tomorrow, a ghost from yesterday, I�m not trying to let you take my breath away, you�re a summer�s breeze that comes and goes, but somehow lingers on, tell me how am I supposed to forget you, if you�re never really gone.

Everyday heartaches grow a little stronger; I can�t take this pain much longer.

If the only place we can be together is in my dreams, I wanna sleep forever.


I never regretted telling you I liked you, the only regret I have is never hearing what you really thought of me.

Sometimes I wish I could go back to the days when I was six and my biggest problem was what kind of dress to put on my Barbie or whether or not I had enough Lagos to build a fort.

You honestly think that just because you don�t like me in that way it will stop me from liking you? You must not understand girls at all.


I hate when people ask if I�m okay�it�s just another reminder that I�m not.

This time it�s over, I�m keeping my heart. I�m gonna be strong and not fall apart, I�ll get better, I�ll no longer cry. In a couple of weeks I won�t wanna die. I won�t wanna go back, I�ll be able to sleep; it won�t hurt so and won�t feel so deep.

Some people enter our lives, leave quickly and soon are forgotten. Others enter our lives and leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.

Sleep is a beautiful thing, it�s the only thing I have of escaping my reality.

Why can�t I wake up in the morning tomorrow and be like I don�t like him anymore and actually mean it�



Missing someone feels like the earth crumbles beneath you � you�re falling with nothing to grab and it comes when you don�t expect it and it never stops coming.

I smile when I feel like crying, I act like I�m okay, when I�m falling apart inside and I let it go, I move on, because there�s nothing else I can do�


I smile because I have to, not because I want to. I laugh because I�m told to, not because I want to. I frown because I want to cry but try to keep it all inside. I wish I could just let it out but I can�t, that�s not what I�m all about. My feelings never show anymore because I don�t want them to. Every smile is a lie, every laugh is fake, all because I�m crying inside and don�t want my tears to show.

Nothing is more painful than realizing he meant everything to you and you meant nothing to him.



I�ll cry you all a river, and build you all a bridge and do you all a favor and jump off it.



Don�t lead me on; don�t leave me confused, any girl would rather be alone than have her heart abused.

All I�m asking for is one night together. Just you and me, all alone, and if you can honestly say you don�t feel anything for me after that night, I will finally let you go.


Are you losing it when a simple song can make you wanna break down and cry?



I don�t run away from you, I walk away slowly, and you don�t care enough to stop me.

Getting over you was the hardest thing I�ve ever had to do, and I don�t think I could ever to it again.




I�m wondering does it hurt you to know that every time I see you I feel like crying.




A good-bye is only painful if you know you will never say hello again.



Eyes are windows to your heart; tears are proof that you have one.




.

Sometimes�when you�re in pain�no one sees you�re hurt.

Physical pain never really hurts�it�s the emotional pain that kills.




I just want you to know that I don�t regret a single moment I ever spend with you.

Just because I�m smiling doesn�t mean I�m happy.



There's so much behind my smile.






You're the reason I live, you're the reason I'd die. You're the reason I smile, yet break down and cry. You're the reason I keep going and the reason I fall. But without you in my life I'm nothing at all






Good-bye is the absolute hardest thing to say, because you have to walk away with just memories, and memories, they fade






Sometimes I look at you�and you seem to be looking back at me�but sometimes you look away�like your afraid of what might happen if we stare at each other a second longer.



Deep in my heart, I�m hiding things I�m longing to say, Scared to confess what I�m feeling, Afraid you�ll slip away.




Sometimes all you can do is smile and go on with your day....hold your tears back and pretend everything�s ok.









I�m tired of trying I�m tired of crying I know I�ve been smiling but inside I�m dying.


Those times we are temporarily holding each other close are the times I would like to permanently stay.

I know I should just get over him, but I can�t seem to. Maybe that�s because you can never get over something that was never really yours.

Don�t ever regret the things you said or did because at one point the things you said or did was what you wanted.

I�m gonna close my eyes and maybe it will all go away�


If you could only see how much you mean to me.



i can relate to all of them.now im crying all becuase im listening to im sry.its so sad yet true...

i post the pics up late i have to go now.i...

have a great day



you dont have to read the quotes of course since their is alot.

i just woke up not to long ago so im still pretty tired.

i know the bg is sucky but i trying to find the perfect one.

my dream last night was:i was at a fair and their were alot of scary rides and stuff and then their was like this briddge thingy and it was wet and i slipped and then my mom tryed to help me up but she coulndt help much then my crush came and he helped me up and he was strong enough.

then i thanked him and he was being a jerk and ignored me like he didint hear me and the dream eneded becuase my parents woke me up T_T

i'll try to get to everyones site but later im going to have to do some chores.

i feel alittle better now though and im not as depressed as yesterday.

i watched little man today and i had to skip a few parts but other than that it was okay and sort of funny.

im staying at home for the whole day which is going to be real boring but i guess i'll come back on to fix my site or sumthing.

my eye hurts though.its like sore and im real tired but my dad wont let me go back to bed T_T


have a great day






Comments (7) | Permalink

Saturday, June 23, 2007

weird dream and stuff
konnchiwa. thank you guys for the comments.
my dream was:

my school was at another school and my store was in it and i was going to check on it and like the whole school followed me. Then my store was empty and been robbed.


then we left and a teacher and her class saw us and she was like you guys aren’t leaving and the girl in the front of the line was like this isn’t our school and she was like shut up and sit down. Then we appeared in a auditorium with seats and everything.

(couldn’t find a pic)

then I was sitting in front of my crush and another crush was sitting in the next row.
it was weird because their was two of my crush.

like this:

if you still don’t get it then I’m trying to say he had a twin in the dream.

i could tell which was which cause they had different clothes on.

anyways we waited in the auditorium until our teachers came and we went to lunch and my crush was sitting in front of me and a girl was sitting next to me. It was just like the time he was acting like he was mad at me and I ignored him. anyways he was like what did you want to talk to me about? and I kept looking at the girl and back at him because I didn’t want her to hear so I told him I’ll tell him later.

then we went back to the auditorium and crush num.2 was sitting in front of me and I was like I’ll tell you at lunch tomorrow kay and he gave me a duh look and said okay.

it used to be annoying yet cute when he did that.

then crush num 1 kept staring at me and I was thinking that I had to chose between which one i want to go with but of course they both look the same...then the dream ended

that’s the only dream I can remember and so far I haven’t been able to remember my 2nd dream.

Here’s a dance vid-

he can dance. My friend doesn’t like the song because she said they stole soulja boys songs but I like it a little.

crank dat spiderman


stan by eminem its sad


I don’t have nothing else to say though.
I cant watch little man yet because my dad said he has to see if I’m allowed to its real annoying its pg13 anyways so I don’t get the deal with it.

Oh…now I remember .today I was walking to convenient and two cute guys were their and one saw me and then he was like checking me out and then he tapped the other ones shoulder and they both kept staring at me. It was awkward…

Here’s some pics in slideshow format…
also some spoilers of AIR so if you dont like spoilers then dont watch the slideshow

also im changing my bg to

reply to comments-

wensdaykitten-i guess so.i hope their okay though.im glad you liked the pics ^ ^.

nercury-yeah the amityville horror was pretty sucky.i was expecting the lil girl to have gotten help but it eneded and their not even a part 2.its okay you havent heard of her.im glad you liked the pics to ^ ^

vespaman-yes i do like him alot...i guess i should get over him.lol.its okay you dont have to read the whole post.

destinyssweetman-yeah i guess stress can cause dreams to be so intense.thanks im happy you like them and my site ^^.

pinkchii009-yeah i know what you mean.the amityville hooror is not that scary but silent hill was plain old creepy.

123zakura123-lol.i watch scary movies most of the time but i mainly watch comedy or action.

angelzakuro-yay!its okay.im happy you didnt disapper though ^^.its okay really.you know toxyu to?yeah the end was pretty good but the begging real scary.usally i wake up from dreams when it has something with me being injured badly or dieing/about to die but i didnt wake from this one.

pingpingani-lol.i thought it was weird to be like that.im glad to know its regular ^^im glad you like the pictures to ^.^.that sucks i hope your nightmares will go away and you'll have better dreams.okay i will ^ ^

princessanika-it was the worst nightmare i ever had.lol.you might be able to recall your dream later.thats a worst dream that mines.yeah it is weird.i cant control what i dream about.i just dream about anything that seems to be bothering me or sumthing just pops up.lol.

tigerfantasy17-yeah pretty much.exept kumiko annoying me.im glad you like it ^^.i coulndt find as much pics for this one.yes it is.

princeyukito-that sucks.im sry to hear that you have them alot.i hope you start to have them less and have happier dreams.im glad you liked the pics ^^.i miss bou to.he was my fav member of ancafe to.

darkcloudangel-thanks im happy you liked it to ^^.yeah i had to watch it three times to actually get it.thanks ^ ^

i hope you all have a great day *hugs everyone*

icon,pic,,and quote of the day-
im sure you guys know this already...






I never regretted telling you I liked you, the only regret I have is never hearing what you really thought of me



Comments (3) | Permalink

Friday, June 22, 2007

my day
sry my post title is always like the same but im not creative when it comes to it...

my day went well.i got to watch three movies which were amityville horror,little man,and silent hill.

then i read a couple of mangas ^ ^.
i coulndt relax much becuase kumiko kept bothering me and asking me where her nail polish wears her earrings and all that.

shes annoying.also my dream last night was a nightmare but good toward the end it was like this:

i was at the park with my crush

and i fell asleep on his lap and i was having nightmares about him strangling me and i was kicking and stuff and i made a mistake and it him in his stomach and then i was like stop and i said his name after and he was looking at me like whats wrong with her and i woke up and i looked at him and smiled and i fell back asleep.


then he got up and he put my head gently on the ground well tryed to but he layed me back down to hard and then my skull was cracked and he didnt notice and he thought i was okay and he went to go get us both drinks


then this guy tryed to kidnap me (yes i know weird) and my crush saw him and he ran and he was like no leave her alone...what do you want money,jewelry and the guy wanted money so my crush gave it to him.

then my crush saw the blood and he was like i guess i put her down to hard or sumin like that


then i got tooken to the hospital and i didnt die ^ ^



then my crush came in a he gave me roses


then i woke up after that.it was scary becuase it was all bloody and the dream actually shown the result of the skull getting cracked its like were the left temple and it had like 4 sides crack in and the blood shown its was like one of the medical shows it was nasty.

thats the only dream i can rember though.

im going to try to comment on missed post today and what i dont get to i'll do it in the morning.

becuase now its night and late and im tired.
i hope you guys like the playlist though and its mainly rap but i get to edit to add songs though so yeah....

i hope everyones day went well yesterday though.
ive been on the otaku 09/06/06.this is my new account.my old account was horrible.

its doasinfinity12 if you want to see how sucky it is.

i dont use that account anymore and also i have 2 little brothers,and 2 sisters.

you guys already know about my older bro....
also im real happy to see alot of you guys back raisha,nercury,eternalparadise,and kuekittykyo^^.

i havent talked to you guys in ages.also have any of you heard from toxyu?

she hasnt been on for a extra long time either neither has treekie15 and ashhikari and some of my other friends.

oh and angelzakuro to.have any of you heard from her?

i had chinese food today and it was real good and i ate two bowls of rice to mixed up white rice and shrimp fried rice and put alittle soy sauce on it ^ ^.then i had this chicken stuff and no hairs which was great but it was real spicy

oh and i think the eating helped cause i didnt shake at all.i was dizzy evrtime i got out my car though but i didnt shake at all.

also i forgot to tell you when i was at school when the girl that hates my crush woke me up from my daydream mycrush was staring at me for like a few seconds then went back to his game.it was embarrsing though.

i was in like a almost deep stage of daydreaming.i tend to daydream sometimes but not much anymore.
replys:

lee radcliffe-thanks ^ ^.i did like the movies but i think i might have nightmares tonight since i watched two scary movies.

vespaman-i already answered your question lol.
but cool ava its ruroni kenshin right?

raisha-your not overprotective.lol.yeah i should take more time off from the compt.but i'll take breaks once in a while

destinyssweetman-sry big bro.i won't be taking breaks much proablabe once every month or sumthing.lol.yeah the spider doing that was pretty unexpecting.i thought it was going to be a bite.im slowly getting over him.since i havent seen him in so long.okay i'll eat more.thank you ^^.yep.i feel better everytime i eat im just get dizzy once i get up from a lying or sitting postion.

123zakura123-thank you ^ ^

cddaisuke-i did enjoy it somewhat.exept for my older sis bothering me thing.thanks im glad you like the pic ^ ^.ya huh.the chicken does have hair you just have to look close at it.maybe you get hairless chicken or sumthing.well i put there songs in the player so you can hear it.their pretty good.i hope you like them to ^ ^

eternalparadise-lol.yeah im usally on here everyday.sowy.welcome back though ^ ^.lol.thats a weird but sweet dream lol.

wensdaykitten-thankz ^ ^.yeah my sleep is pretty good know i just hopei dont have anymore scary dreams like today.

joselyn-yeah i hate spiders to.they creep me out and evrytime i see one i start screaming.im sure you'll get more soon.just visit people alot and stuff.lol.i'll to do that just incase i spot him ~^.^~

the next flcl-that sucks you get forced to take breaks.i guess my parents don't care because if i wasnt on here i'll get in fights with my older sis all the time

nercury-lol.welcome back ^ ^.yeah spiders are creppyish gross.well atleast im not the only one that hates it ^ ^.its the grossest thing ever.thank you ^.^

kuekittykyo-its okay.thanks ^^.yeah youre right.its happened once maybe i might see him again.lol.okay i will.

tigerfantasy17-okay ^ ^.i just wanted to make sure it was okay becuase im usally on here all the time and i dont want any of you guys to worry about me ^^

princessanika-lol.im the same way.i drink alot of juice and hardly eat much.chicken does have hair you have to look close at it.i just stick to eating the meat and peel the skin off.okay thank you ^ ^

thank you all for such nice comments.your guys are awesome friends.without you all i would never have gotten so far.thank you all again *hugs everyone*

here some pics and you like the music player

i was so like this when my crush was with his girlfriend...is that bad?



marking of a new beggining


damn i cant think of a good poem to give to him!


hes coming my way....what am i suppose to say?i dont want to say anything stupid to him...


im so stupid why didnt i think of that before?


yay july is coming soon


you lied becuase now im all alone.....


bou and kanon


bou is so kawaii


why is rose the symbol of love?


im addicted


smile even though your hurting inside


miyavi.also im trying to make this into a banner but it wont show up on the banner


the most kawaii icons you ever seen lol





awesome





pretty


sakura blossoms...the perfect theme for a romance story


yummy look at all the food


i could only find two pieces of the skikon no tama sry...


ooo look a strawberry =^.^=


dream land


pretty ruki


sooo prety


my fav pudding cake ^ ^


icon of the day:


my fav shows
house






i hope this post wasnt to to long.







Comments (8) | Permalink

Thursday, June 21, 2007

tmrw,stuff....
konnchiwa.is it okay if i take a break from myo tmrw?

if not then i'll stay on then...im planning on watching some movies and relaxing tmrw.

i'll get to the post i miss the day after kay.
i sleep okay last night but i had a weird dream.its was like we found this secret party room and it was me,my aunt,my dad,mom,and lil bros and we were looking around and then this medium spider was on the wall and i told my dad about it and he was like tranced and my aunt didnt pay attention and it ate her 0_o it was weird....

unfourtunaltely though no more cute dreams of me and my crush T_T.i havent seen him in 4ever and miss him to death.

i hope he'll be like this if we meet again:


i kind of doubt it.also thank you all for the advice i'll eat more.

today i got chicken and mash potatos and i ate almost all the chicken just not the skin.the skin is nasty cause it has hairs on it

also as for pics i'll remove them from the post and put them in a slideshow the day after tmrw though kay.

i added new music and a new player but the same songs before with songs added on.also i heard of hellogoodbye before but i never knew that here was sung by them.

also i got a new fav band theyre called victim effect i only have 2 of there songs on my playlist theyre pretty good ^ ^

also yesterday i actually got to everyones site which was great.

also im glad you guys like my poem.it it was kind of hard to think of and i had my fan on so it made it harder to think but i did alittle better than my other poems.

i wish i could give it to my crush but i dont see him anymore and plus he might get mad.

also i didnt shake at all today which was great and im sleep alright but i kept twisting and turning and i was thrsty but my dad put on the alarm so i coulndt get a drink.

i cant add pics today sry i have to go to bed soon.also thanks for 1,200 hits and 188 gb signs and also for the comments thank you *hugs everyone*

oyuminasai

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i spent so much time adding songs and its not showing up *crys*
Comments (10) | Permalink

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

back to normal
konnchiwa.i made a new poem i hope you like it.i made it last night.i was bored and thinking of my crush and i came up with this ^ ^

i need you...to love me

i need you day and night and without you i'm slowly dying....
i cry everynight becuase now i know you were lieing.
you gave me cards and you gave me poems...all of them said "i love you" but i guess they were all just lies becuase now im all alone.
i miss you so much and i love you still...even through the hell you put me through.
i'm sitting at home rereading your poems and remebering all those lies you told me
you said you need me and would never hurt me to.i guess they just werent true...
i would never hurt you or make you cry or even tell you one stupid lie.
i remeber the first time i saw you.you immediately caught my eye and that is when i fell in love for the first time.
i thought we were meant to be...just you and me but that was yet anither lie...never to come true
the main thing i want to tell you is that i need you with me so please come back..please love me more and don't hold back
i wish that you had never lied and then i would never have to cry day and night.
i want you now,needed you then just please come back so we start again

you likes?

anyways my post is back to mormal and my cut on my left leg hurts still.i put a bnadaid on it and it stick to my cut like glue and it was painful to take it off to.

i got real good sleep and my dreams were awesome well my first one the 2nd one was sad

dream one

well first of all i was in math class and we were taking this test and i was the first one done and then this one girl and boy got in a fist fight and the math teacher broke it up and told them to move far from eachother and then class was over and so i got a glass of water with ice and then i saw my crush and i put down my glass and i ran up to him and gave him a real tight hug and then he was like i missed you and i jumped on him and he picked me up and then i kissed him and we looked each other in the eyes for a long time and his blue eyes are so pretty *sighs*...um yeah anyway he was like want to go out on...sumday and then i was like yeah okay and he smiled and i went to the autitorium cause we were having a pep ralley and we had a sub principal and she was extra mean and then the dream eneded.

my fav part was when he asked me out ^ ^ and sry the explanation was so long.if you dont like me to post about my dreams just tell me and i'll stop kay?

anyway dream 2

this dream was that my schol had a field trip to go to the park and my old crush from last year was their and his lil bro was with him and he didnt even go to our school for this year so i thought it was weird he was their and then my autnie was with me and the girl i hated was their but we were happy to see eachother 0_o
then my crush was playing basketball with his friends and i kept staring over by him and when he was done he came over by me and his creepy friends followed him and he was like sometimes i think of you as a little sister (kind of weird becuase i dont think he would ever say that...but its just a dream so weird things happen in the...) then we went to this room and his old gf was their and i hte her to death not becuase she went with him but yeah alot of you know the reason...okay anyways i was asking him dumb questions like why didi you two break up" and stuff.

i would never ask him that 4real even though i am wondering why but its none of my buisness and i know its personel so i leave stuff like that alone.

anyways he was mad becuase i asked him that and it ended.

so i had some weird but kid of cool dreams.

i'll try to get to everyones site today i stay up pretty late so i might be able to visit.

also thank you all for the comments ^ ^

im going back to comment replys though.
i had 5 attacks today and its scary my parents say becuase i need to eat more but i dont think that the problem.


also i went skating and i didnt fall at all i had balance and i could get up on the sidewalk without falling down.

i had to stay in my driveway and it was kind of hard but then i got it and my cut still hurts i got cut deep.its like i got burnt and caught at the same time.

im also doing reasearch on a castle i used to live by.its said to be haunted i dont belive it unlessi see and hear the stuff my self but the story is really really sad.

hmm...i dont have much to say oh heres some pics ^ ^""

cool pics











kanon of air



i can relate to this


these quotes are so true



this qote is so cute


have a great day


i'll add replys later

Comments (11) | Permalink

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

boring *sighs*
today was pretty much boring.so my crush was all i could think about today.im not sad or anything nor really happy just bored.

im happy that some of you guys liked my playlist and also i got some cuts on my legs.

i have this mark to from the skates becuase they were to tight.on my right leg it looked like i got burnt by s iron or sumthing and it hurts if i touch it.

then on my left leg i had to put a bandaid over it becuase it hurts alot and it still hurts bad.

my lil brother was getting on my nerves alot today and my anger just went up to the top.

he was so anooying and i stomped and took a deep breath i was so mad and then i kept catching a atitude with him for the whole day and my dad was like you cant go online if you keep it up then we went to the store and then my dad said i hit him with the grocery bag on purpose and i didnt then i coulndt go online for a while and now im on but my dad said if i do anything then i wont be able to go online again.

so if i dont come on for a long time then that means that im not allowed to go back on but im trying to prevent though so i have to act good mow....

i cant remeber my dream last night though.
i slept okay though.

this is the shortest post i made so you guys got a break.
ja ne
Comments (8) | Permalink

Monday, June 18, 2007

embarssing
okay before i get to the embarrsing part im going to try to put my post in order.

well first of all i had to wake up early because my cousin came over again.

we went outside and my friends were their to.
so we were skating and i actually got better than yesterday i can glide now and i dont fall as much.

well the embarssing thing was that i was skating and 3 boys were walking pass and i was skating a car was coming down the street and i coulndt stop becuase i had only one stopper and it dosent help much and i twisted and fell on my stomach and it hurted then they looked back at me and it was so embarssong.

then i fell like 2 other times.
thn we were getting soaked with water guns and stuff and mainly haveing fun and my friends brother was their and i was like you know my *crushes name*then he was like what his last name and i told him and he was like i dont know him and he was like describe him and i coulndt really think of much words to describe him and then he was like he rides a bike alot and i was like not really.

the he was like i think i know who your talking about and then i was like do you know his number or your sister? and he was like i dont know if she knows and i dont know it either and then he was like why do you wat his number?

then i was like to just talk to hm but i guess he seen me blushing because he smiled alittle and giving me the you like him look.

then he was like i'll ask him though and then he was like but then again your dad might kill you.tthen my friend was like shes old enough and he asked me how old i am and i told him and he was like your dad going to kill you if he finds out you know how he is when it comes to you with boys nimbers and i was like yeah but if he dosent find out...and he was like i wont tell him.


i used to have a crush on him before but none of my friend knew that.i still like him alittle bit but not as much as before.

anyways i was skating for pretty much the whole day.then we went swinging and then a guy went pass and i kept staring at him then he gae me this weird look i just looked at him because he looked alittle like my crush but anyways my little brother was like "pee it!"to the me but the guy the guy tought he was talking to him and he was like laughing and his laugh was kind of cute but anywyas he was like i was walking down the strret and one little boy told me to pee it an i started cracking up.

then my brother was like i was taling to you not him.it was so funny though.

then it was night and the the boys sister came down the street and i ran up to her and i was like do you know *crushes name*? and she was like no then i said his friends name the one tat lives n my strret and she was like he might know his number and i was like can you tell him t ask *crushes name*if can have his number?

then she was like why do you want his nmber?or you two going out?i got mad though becuase everyone keeps coming up with that are you two going out?you to should go out and all that.

its real annoying.im not even alowwed to date yet anyways.

anyways i cant ask the boy myself becuase he dsent really like me and their other stuff but i rathr not discuss it online.

also thank you fot the comment it was very very little but it dosent matter atleast i got some advice so thanks.
Comments (6) | Permalink