Saturday, February 23, 2008

agitated and tired
sooo i hope you guys were okay.this is just pics so here ya go-


credit for all these pics goes to my friend trina so tnk her for the awsum photos lol









dani gore


kiki cannibal




bruise violet

dani gore

devin coffin

dani gore

hannah beth

jeffree star

lindsey nintendo


babyfayce/katie










brittany kramer

brittany kramer again

dakota rose

dani gore

dani gore

hannah beth and audrey kitching

hannah beth and jac vanek

kiki cannibal






awesome highlights

gloomy bear

hannah beth

hannah beth

hannah beth

audrey kitching

audrey kitching

audrey kitching

kayla


hannah beth

kayla

*drools* he has an amazingly hawt body!

and here is the owner of that hawt body.he is soo cute dont you agree? ^^



emily rose


chris and sam who are real hawties and heres 2 vids of them 2


the kittys with them how hawtsh!



emily rose


her hair is awesome and so is her eyeliner





aww the grim reaper shirt is to cute and i absoloutely love his hoodie


well im about to go to bed but i will get to you guys 2 mrw.right now i just have a bad headache sry bye
Comments (4) | Permalink

Monday, February 11, 2008

   ........hi.......
yeah so...things are pretty shitty for me so yeah i wont go on to complaining.

whats goin on with u guys? sry that i havent been here like i said things are shitty so i guess...w/e

hope u guys were fine and also wth happened to the fuckin comment box?! i cant comment on no ones shit.oh well and i hope they dont come up with a corny ass bullshit rule saying no more cussing or your getting the boot.that would suck since i cuss a considerable lot.

so i might as well talk about some thngs...

well i see my "crush" sometimes randomly at school and it kind of creeps me out about how i used to like him so much but atleast hes not getting to me as much anymore...hes a cool friend though and i feel bad for calling him a jerk since hes not.he is nice as can be but sometimes i just annoy the hell out of him lol.

so um pics and my site renevations is going on now.....

pics-

here style is so awesome.the shirt is 2 cute and i love the chunky braclets and beads

brittany kramer

skyeglam and LA.the dude is alittle cute

audrey kitching is so awsum

jefree star,audrey and hannah beth

audrey and jac vanek

jac vanek

jeff star then and now

kiki cannibal

kiki and koti(dakota rose-koti)

then and now 4 kiki cannibal

raquel reed

awsum hair

cool hair and cute dog

cant wait for it to come out only 3 more days.their should be more tyler though becuase he is oh so damn hawt! what happened to nora though? its almost like a complete diffrent movie but its still looks awsum though


thats all for today bye byez
Comments (2) | Permalink

Monday, January 14, 2008

um...same old thing...hi
okay...so sry for not being on here in a while.
lately i feel like no one cares about my lil complaints and problems that i have to deal with but i know that i should come back on here especially because my friends on here to. lately I’ve been busy with school and all the teachers keep telling me is you know you’re failing my class. They don’t give me a fucking break.

im going through other shit but the only thing those selfish bastards think about is their money and lately my parents been pissing me off to.

i guess i get mad a little to easily though...um i made a new poem today and it came out somewhat good-

title-the bullet in the form of a pill

A decision lays before me, The way to take my life.

Shall it be by a gun or be by a knife? Making an incision to break the skin and reach the vein or by a bullet that pierces through my flesh and passes through my brain?

There’s many others that trust the knife with their life but most don’t succeed, Their rescued before they die.

The gun, Yes I choose the gun. It's a trusty friend indeed, One shot is a lethal dose, It is all that i need.

I pick up the gun and lay on my bed, I put the cold metal upon my head, I'll pull the trigger as fast as i can, Bang goes the gun, Now more blood stains this land.

Everything goes dark, I'm now dead. I thought i would reach heaven but i reached hell instead.

THEE END

hoped you liked it. I’m planning on doing more revising to it though. it didn’t come out that good but i gave it a try. poetry is fun to write but sometimes it takes lots of thinking for me.

hoped you’re all good ^^.i'll try to visit tmrw which is the dance for me. Its probably going to be dumb.

my 8th grade class is suppose to go to washing ton dc but my parents said i cant go because they don’t trust anyone and their over protective i mean very...it sucks living with them.

well i got to go now.i'll try to get on tmrw bye ^^

Comments (1) | Permalink

Thursday, January 3, 2008

darn T_T
man i only one night of good sleep and then my nightmares came back and i cryed myself to sleep last night thinking about "it" which as it i mean my crush (old crush)-hint:one i always talk about.i think you get it.

i dislike him now for showing up.he shoudlnt have come at that time.it was a bad time and plus he had to stand right by me when he was talking to the gym teacher i mean he didnt hae to be right by me.

i freaked and i was shaking also becuase 1.i was kind of scared...tht i pissed him off somehow but luckily he wasnt.hes still kind of creppy

2.i was angered to

do you think i need anger management classes? i mean i cant control my nager as well anymore like i just black out for a quick second when i get mad and i cant remember what i did for a bit and then i finally remember.

that time i was trying to deal with my anger but it came out in this completely weird uncontrolled way.i didnt even mean for it to come up like that but it turned into this high enegry thing.i was so shaky basically becuase i was mad and i hugged my crush just to see if i was right about not liking him anymore and if it was the same.

it wasnt the same and it was just...idk uselessly weird.so now i know i dont have those feelings for him anymore becuase if i did i would have gotten butteflys instead of feeling sick to my stomach and i wouldnt even be corageous enough to talk with him.i dont talk much to him beucase i dont trust nothing that he has to say anymore not after that lie.i guess to protect me feelings but still he does not understand me at all.

its annoying when people dont understand me espcially when i tryed to get the point across over an over and over again and he dosent understand that im not stupid and i know when hes lying.

ek...i bet you guys are sick and tired of hearing me talk about that thing so i'll shut up.

aniway um....nothing new for me except last night i had a nightmare and i felt it again.i was tickled like my back and side which are ticklish only when force is applied im not easily tickled.so it was weird.in my dream i wasnt dreaming about bein tickled i was dreaming about a ghost again but it was like a cartoon looking ghost and it was trying to take my brother away from me like snatching him out of my arms even though my brother is quite heavy.

anyway i tryed to get him back and then we went spiraling and i got tickled and i end up waking up in the middle of the night which was how long i slept.

still having that ticklish feeling and i dont know whats causing it.its not the cover.i know that for a fact and i just dont know what it is.espcially since it was on my back and side ad of course i cant even reach my back.so i didnt do it myself without acknolegement.its creeping me out.

i think my house is huanted to.it prolly sounds so retarded and i bet you guys think it is....but i see things like shawdows when im in a certain area of my house all alone and sometimes i feel like thiers another precsecne in the room but no one else is their.

i start panicking when that happens to.i told my parents but of course they dont belive me except my mom said it could be possible but she wouldnt want to think of it.

it remind her of the amityville horror.i still cant get the image of th little girl i seen here in my house...i was in my bathroom and then i felt another presense and i looked around and i thought i seen my brother but the door was closed so he couldnt have posible ben in their and then i looked again and it was gone then i looked toward the door and i seen a little girl.she was dressed in like 1904 clothing it appered to be like a laced dressed thing an old one.my house was built in the 1918 so maybe it is possible.

she had brown hair and she just walked through the door and after that i never seen it again.maybe i was hallucinating but i could have sworn thats what i saw.when i was younger i used to see things rarely though.

it scares me.do you think im hallucinating? is it possible?

its not the first time i seen things...they think its just what you think appears to be a ghost but its diffrent but they werent shawdows theyre like the real thing not like something you see in movies either.

its the 2nd time i seen something like that in my house and when its dark in my attic lie no lights im afraid to go up their it feels as if something is up their.i havent heard bad things about the house.the first time i moved to my house i felt like something was upstairs a sick feeling thats why i was always scared to go up their by my self.

it probably sounds completely crazy...now i dont see them i see shawdows and i feel a presence when no ones even around.

yesterday i came up stirs from my basement i was down stairs by myself and the kitchen was dark and so was the living room and then all of a sudden i seen like this real quick shawdow flash.like it was dark and i appeared as if something moved in the dark fast like one of those scary movies ghost.it creeped me out and i was breathing so hard and i ran to the light and turned them on.

i want to look into the history but i dont know how or where i should go to...im sure sum1 died in my house...people a family....

my house kind of disturbs me...idk whay it is....but its not the first time...the first tme was much worse than this.i started to follow it...i was dazed andalmost what seemed like paralyzed and the thing...had red glowing eyes and sharp teeth....no one will belive me abou it only a crazy person would so im sure you guys think im dumb for even putting this up....

i'll shut up about that....


also heres some stff thats been bothering me about the "emo" snit.just to clear some people up on it-

emo does stand for emotional its an abbreviation.its originally a type of music that was brought out in the late 1980s.teens started to make it into this fashion scene which later spread world wide.over some time it became less and less popular and that is why so many people do not know the real meaning or heard of it.

people get into it to be cool and they think its all about being suicidal and depressive and all but its nothing like that nor is it a fashion scene.its way of life not what other people try to make of it.

im sick and tired of hearing that "emo" is stupid or gay or their fags or anti emo campains bullcrap becuase a person is a person and they shouldnt get beat down by punks and goths and other people becuase of how they dress or act or anything.

the labels thing is like some sort of brainwashing thing where if your diffrent from a group or if you act a certain way or something or just the way you dress then people automatically hate you and judge you becuase of it an its not even right.

people have lots of definitions of emo but i think the true definitios isnt about cutting,suicidal thoughs,being depressed,being bi,gay or a lesbo,none of it.

its just a rock genre and some peoples way of life not the flippy hair or tight pants or boys kissing other guys.

but just because other people are doing that stuff and classify themslves as emo and says it cool dosent mean it is and dosent mean youll have to be apart of it.just be you and thats all.


i dont label myself labels are idiotic and people shouldnt be labeled like in groups thats what i mean.the other sutff like male female and all that other stuff yeah thats important i guess.

aniway thats how i felt on that.replys-

kuekittykyo-i hope you get to see it soon then ^^.thats awesome that you got to see dead silence.i love that movie and i think the guy is pretty cute ^^.it is pretty creepy and the ending was a complete shocker to.its great to watch over and over again though ^^.i hope thiers not a mary shaw if their was then i would tape my mouth over wit duck tape so se wouldnt get my tounge.that would be creepy.if i ever got a ventriloquist doll i would throw run it over a car and then throw it in the ocean.

hehe thanks ^^.unfoutnately the dumb things came back T_T.i dont know why i have to keep having them.yay for fuzzy socks! i luv hello kitty socks.they should make jack skeleton socks and skeleanimal ones to if their not already out ^^

lol.people think im weird becuase i dont make any sound when i laugh.i finally figured out its becuase i laugh so hard.i always laugh hard even i its something thats not really funny.i just start crying and gasping for air.

~^.^~ hehe.its just fun typing and i never shut up lol.i usally get aches sometimes.i dont get hand cramps as much though.

lol.he is really adorable.hes a talented comediain lol.its so funny the cute lil faces he made ^^.

yah he is hot! i luv him.he has the perfect pack.its so sexy.

lol.you would be so lucky if you got to change him ^^

tnxs.happy new years to you also ^^.oh and tankies for the long long comment.i appreciate it ^^

angelzakuro-lol.yeah it sure is ~^.^~.thank you very much ^^.thanks for the long comments to i appreciate them alot.

wow...were both experiencing the same thing.it sucks soo bad T_T.i wish their was a do it yourself real fast cure.that would be awesome.

i hope that youll get better also.yeah its weird.if i was going to have a empty dream then i shouldnt have never had a dream at all.

it prolly is from not having enough blood circulation.it sucks always being so cold.people in my class say they think i have hypothermia but how would i have that.that would be impossible since i dont go in cold freezing water and have none of the symptoms.

lol.thats jared leto ^^.im glad you think hes sexy to.its like a fan club lol.thanks i hope your new year went well and i hope it will stay well to.



eternal paradise-heyz!*hugs* welcome back.i havent heard from you in ages.

its okie ^^.okie thanks ^^.ill try to drink more water.thank you very much again.i wish you the same to ^^

destinyssweetman-thank you bro ^^.lol.its okay and thank you for the tissues.

its no big deal.their alittle better than nightmares i guess.na uh i never dreamt of that kind of thing before so thats why it was so weird.

no i never thought of empty spaces either.it was weird since it was so bright and white in the room.

theirs no reason to be sry ^^.thak you for the heater blanket to ^^.i appreciate it alot.

yeah im sure.when im not sick im still like that.its so weird.its like my hands are always cold now.

i prolly should.my mom said she wants me to get a lot of blood test to make sure im no anemic or anything but im kind of scared to go to the doctor since......my bad habits will get in the way.


i like to type alot and i think everyone deserves nice lenth comments for visting,commenting and just being awesome friends ^^

you welcome.i hope you will become less stressed soon.stress sucks.me neither.it sucks.they could have done way better.

youre very much welcome and i appreciate you clearing up the new version stuff for me ^^.


well to all i wish you guys a great and awesome days and all of the best to be ahead of you.

pics/vids-

fallen angel by chris brown (she kind of reminds me of my friend trina.she is a great dancer though and i luv the song.her style is awesome to)


Ya boi D giggin-wow...he dances fast.


i luv this song.new version

new version of the tootsie roll


she can dance good and the baby that went in their is so cute ^^.i love both the songs

Tootsie Roll + The Dougie (Terrific) by Sikk


Phoenix Mourning - when the sky falls


i luv him lol.hes hawt and his screaming is great
BMTH-Pray For Plagues(vocal cover)brandon Baker *NEW*


he is hawt!!!!! i absoulutely luff him.hes the shiot.his scream roxs and i luv 1:50 to 1:19.its my favo parts lol.
blessthefall - Black Rose Dying cover scream


pics-
































buh byez have a great day














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Monday, December 31, 2007

i like your hair scott fuxin vanity is in the building pshyeah
hi'z.thank you all for the long comments and for visting and for the nice comforting comments to ^^.
also jrockersbaby s going to be updated more now just some random stuff on their to ^^

ummmm....nothing intresting happened today...i got to watch 28 weeks though.it was awesome.the graphic were great and crepped me out but i liked it. it was sad though.i literally started crying but i wont spoil it.

i dont have much to say though.....oh i didnt have nightmares last night.they were more like....empty dreams....

like they were both about this empty white space and i was all alone in it nothing intresting happened though.i dont know why i would dream about something like that though.

also lately ive been feeling real freezing cold.its pretty much my hand and feet and sometimes my leg.they get ice cold and i get this chill feeling to.i dont know whats wrong with me but i get like this alot.

then my face is usally really hot sometimes feverish hot or other times warm.its not my cold either.it happens when im not sick to.

also i forgot the *hugs* lol.i missed you all.i havent heard from none of you guys in so long.im glad you all came to visit and i apologize for my lack of visting lately.

oh and i think its weird how i dont make any sound when i laugh.i only have sounds when i gasp for air but i guess its becuase i laugh so hard maybe.

um....soo theirs nothing else so replys then.....


angel zakuro-tnk you and its okay about commenting.i dont mind at all ^^.*hugs* im sry to hear that things arent going well for you T_T.i hope that things will start to get better for you real soon.
i never knew that being depressed could make you sick.thats intresting yet weird lol.my cold is starting to clear up some.i just have a runny nose and coughing now so i know its at its peak which is good.
i hope theres going to be one.the renovation sure does take a very long time on here but its better than having the whole site on lock down.
*hugs* im sry to hear that you are having nightmares also and that your depressed to being depressed and having nightmares sure do suck T_T.
im glad that you had a good christmas ^^.


foamy14-thank you.im confusd on the new otaku thingy since i havent been on in a while i havent heard anything of it.
your nightmares seem to be way worse than mine 0_0.most of the time when im about to die i either wake up or the dream just does this flash by thing and that part of the dream just restarts and i make a better chose.
that is weird that you dreamt of blood and then woke up to have blood all over you.that seems really creepy. i never had anything like that happen to me before thats way intense.
im glad you liked the pics and tnx again.

kuekittykyo-lol.*hugs* hi ^^.it has been real long since i last been on here atleast it seems like it to me also.
skeleanimals are the best and their so cute!i dont own any unfortunenately T_T.your so lucky! i love the hoodies also ^^.
thankies ^^.my cold is starting to calm down which is good ^^.yeah its exactly like that.its so tempting.lol dont wry im slow when it comes to lots of things to espcailly when it comes to things like lip reading.
uh huh i mean like myspace to ^^.they also should def update the mood thingys theyre so boring looking thats why i arely use them and plus most of the time when i use custom the icon dont show up and they should have the mood type with the smileys to.it would make it so much more intresting.
it is annoying since you dont know how many visit you got ad just imagine if they update the site what if the numbers go back to zero.that would suck.
hehe lol.thats funny ^^.you so didnt hurt me by saying that about him.i know its weird that i dream more about him now.its so annoying.i was so close to being all the way over him but no he had to visit then.it was such a bad time.he is so immature and i expected people in highschool to be way more mature but hes the same execpt more of a airhead.
lol.yep it was nice to dream about cussing her out.luckily i dont have to see her animore.
frangrances rule ^^.i also love flavored lip gloss and lip balm to ^^.
kayz ^^.im glad you like the pics to.


destinysweetsman-*gasp* yay!!!!!!!!!!welcome back! i havent heard from you in what seems like decades.i hope youve been doing well ^^.
its okay.no need to apologize what so ever.tnx you ^^.my cold is starting to get better which is good and lately i have been getting lots of rest atleast in the morning lol.
thats pretty good ^^.i hope they will also set up a private profile button where you can chose private whenever you want or you can go back to publci if you change your mind.that would be nice to ^^.
thank you for clearing that subject up.i hope it will look great and i bet it will ^^.
im glad to hear from you again to ^^. yeah my dreams can get pretty violent and sometimes real gorey to.
yes im fine thanks for asking ^^.eh...i got my problems here and their but its nothing i cant handle.
*hugs* i hope you will get more gifts soon.i usally get moset of my gifts some days after chirstmas is over with.i hope the same is with you.
im glad you like the pics also and tnx again ^^.


randoms-

evil eye lol a must see vid.its funny and cute



sexy!


buh byz





Comments (4) | Permalink

Sunday, December 30, 2007

   blek....im sick
ive been sick and still am. I have a bad sore throat a cough and a stuffy nose. I guess its because of my irregular seep pattern. I stay up all night then through some of the morning and then go to sleep in the morning and i wake up at night and its the same cycle.

i hope you all are fine. My days are okay ad ive been resisting the urge. Its hard though...its almost like trying to stop smoking...

some of you already know what im talking bout sum don’t but I hope you know and wont have to bring it up don’t want to say because....its a public site which I hate!

we should be able to choose if we want strangers to view your site or just your friends only.this is a vilotion of our safety online atleast i think so.

plus I don’t understand why they’re always doing these construction but they never change the sites bg or add cool things to it at all. I mean like come on they should do something but i guess they have allot on their hands already....

im going to be able to visit tmrw or maybe some people today um..confusin....

im mad because know that my crush came up to the school he got me all confused again and i was so fuxin close to getting all the way over him and being a little more happier. It suck ditch!

i feel embrassed now about the...whole thing of just like idk.my anger just came out in a whole diffrent way than normal which is really weird but i was able to let it out.it felt good to let it out but i still feel kind of guilty about it all.


lately ive been having nightmares and i feel whats happening in the dream...like i dreamt that i was trying to get my belongings back from this ghost thingy and i was being tickled and i actually felt it which was real weird.

then later i had one dream where i was on a bus and i was about to fall off of it and their was a boy sitting next to me and i asked him for help and i begged him but he said no.why should i help and eventually i end up falling off the bus but one of my friends got my leg but i end up slipping but i wasnt hurt when i fell.

then later i got out of the bus just for a break and then one of my old rivals was in my dream but she was grown up and looked more mature and she was like you can jointhe jaguars even though it is an all guy group and i was like im sry but i dont hang with preps and then her friend was like omg!did she just call us preps were so not preps.

then my old rival took off her heels and earring and i rolled my sleeves up and she was acting like she was going to fight but she jus walked away which was dumb and i looked real confused and then another girl jumped in it and she started cussing and she pulled her and they started fighting but the girl beat the crap out of my rival though and she was crying and the girls bf tryed to break them up but the other girl broke free of his grip and started swinging at her.

the rest gets even weirder.last night i dreamt about my crush or better yet aquantince lol....aniway it was kind of weird and my old feelings rushed back.

he was pissed at me i guess he was giving me those cold looks that he used to give me.i know i was annoying but he should have told me....back to the dream though.

my parents were in it and helping him with his "girl problems" he told them that his gf woulndt return his calls and shes been acting weird around him and all.my parents said maybe shes cheating and everything.

its weird though.i dont know why i woud dream of something like that.

then i had one dream when i met my other rival the girl i fought.i still hate her to.i can hold grdges forever actually unless i feel like i should show them some sympathy and give up.

aniway she was hanging out with these emo styled girls and boys but none of the boy looked cute.they all looked at me like i was way diffrent even though i was dressed in these cute clothes which was like a stripped skirt and other cute stuff.

then later we were in class and one girl in my class was like "you know those two hate each others gts why put them in the same room with eachother.

than me and my rival kept yelling at each other and i cussed her out so bad to.

then later i seen my crush in my dream and he was like hi and my dad was leading the line and he looked at us and i joined the line and looked away from him and then he went back to up stairs and i trailed behind and then i was like hi in a low voice not like i was shy just so my dad wouldnt see us.

then i had to get back in line and thats all i remember of it.

aniway my dreams are done so lets talk about life shall we lol.

my christmas was aweshums! i got some cool stuff i even got a real cute hoodie and my mom thought it was gothic but its not. i like it though ^^.

i got a knitting machine,flavored lip balm,a gingerbread beauty set basically fragrances,a real cute sweater,a cute purse,lip gloss(its my love),a ijam guitar,a alarm/radio/ipod player,a projector,and a puzzle which has 700 pieces.so im not going to use it anytime sooon.

replys-

kuekittykyo-*hugs*yay!welcome back ^^.ive been...oh yeah i forgot to pm you about it oops sry.i'll tell you in a pm.um....well the whole post wasn’t a dream. My dream pretty much came true. its creepy get de ja vu some times. Like i feel like certain things have happen before and it makes me feel like im stuck in the past and it makes me feel just weird like this panicky feeling.lol.weird thoughts pop i my head alot to ^^.

princessanika-i dont mind that at all so theirs no need to apologize. I don’t really get to visit much either.lol.people piss me off so yeah i curse allot but not when im around my parents or people that would tell them. They would kill me for cursing but when im at school and get pissed i cuss alot.the post i just try to limit on my cussing before some1 trys to complain about it or something...thanks ^^.im changing it today though. I had it for alittle to long.thank you ^^

princeyukito-*hugs*yayyyy!!!! welcome back and im surprised you remembered my name lol ^^.yeah im still kind of having troubles but i don’t like him anymore im just kind of a friend to him.thank you very much ^^.

tigerfantasy17-um...the whole post wasn’t a dream....only the first sentence which explains alittle of the dream. Its weird because in alot of my dreams my crush is always in the gym room/lunch room when i see him and whenever i do see him like a surprise hes pretty much always in the lunch room when he comes to visit.its creepy almost like a psychic thing. You welcome ^^.aww your so harsh on your self seriously. I bet it was as bad as your trying to put it.i bet it was a good poem. that’s mean that your guy friend found it amusing. What kind of poem was it? im glad it went well though ^^.thank you.



site changes coming very soon

pics-





















yes i know how that feels






@scott fuxin vanity! pshyeah@

enjoy your days
Comments (3) | Permalink

Friday, December 21, 2007

   a weird arse day!
hiyaz@! soooooooooo......yeah lol.thank you all for visiting and commenting and im glad you guys liked my poem so much and i will go back to seprate responses at the end of this post.

aniway im scared.....one of my dreams came tru! seriously becuase yesterday night or howeva you want to put it i dreamt that ....well basiclly i dreamt about one of my friends who is also my crushes old gf and my crush also shown up in my dream.

so then yesterday at scool the girl i dreamt about wasnt their for a long time but i had a feeling she would show up and well shes more like an aquantice since i dont really talk to her all like that but aniway as i was saying i had a feeling she would show up and then she end up showing up at the scool at luch time and that kind of creeped me out but i thought it was just a conincidence but then today my crush came up to the school and i had a feeling i would see him soon to.it was kind of weird and its the second time something like this happened.....


sooo....i had an anger management issue.lol. this other girl who plays to much was like "such and such is hear" and i didnt belive her at first but i looked back and then i looked in front of me and i almost had an heart attack.

i was like "oh...shit.wtf......how?..." i just kept trailing off i didnt belive my eyes.

i mean like why would he come up to my school for and plus it was lunch time.how he get off so early?

then later i threw away my hotdoggies T_T.i was sad and mad about that.lol.i kind of went off when i seen him.i was still pissed at him so to prevent myself from cussing him out or anything i let out the unwanted enery.

my friend was looking at me like "wth" it was funny.then she was like "damn!calm down jeez." lol.she was like "breathe!" after that becuase i couldnt catch my breath and stuff.it was funny.i dont know but i had a rush of mixed emotions thier thats why i was so....weird at that time.

also he made me feel sick.i almost threw up for real dont know why but w/e i had to swallow it down but none came up it was stuck and i didnt have nothing to drink so my throat was hruting like something scratched it or something.

later i talked to him alittle and stuff.im annoying to him even though he said im not....i think i told u all already. i dont mind it i think its hilaruious.

sooooo....um...my mind kind of went blank when i seen him and i forgot what i wanted to ask him but yeah..............i dont like him animore but i was like omg hes sexy and my friend was like omg shut up hes ugly lol.it was funny and i said no hes not.i was just playing when i said hes sexy he isnt but hes not ugly and hes not all that cute.

oh and then first of all my friend.....the gurl who said "such and such is here" was all like "why dont you say something to your man" and it pissed me off so bad beucase he was right their and hes not my man and i dont like him like that animore and thatr wasnt even the only thing she did that pissed me off but that was the the second to last straw and i couldnt control myself and i end up slapping her it weasnt the hardest i could slap either but she pissed me off.

if i was really pissed off it would have been more than a little bitch slap.then my crush was like "damn!" and everyone else was just gasping after wards and i just laughed my anger off they thought i was joking but a few knew that i was dead serious.

i was about to fight but i thought again.she pissed me off so bad and it wasnt an act then she told me that since i have seizures she isnt doing nothing about it and that im lucky but she told me in a whisper.i just laughed it off alittle but i was seriously pissed but to prevent getting into anything i just kept my mouth shut and my fist to my side.

shes lucky that i can control myself and my seizures arent no exxcuse what so ever.i think she just didnt want to fight becuase 1.she was scared or 2.becuase it was her birthday but most likely 2.

im not talking to her anymore either becuase she plays way to much and then she trys to teel me who i can talk to and who i cant and she always snatches my notes from me.so the best thing is to keep our distances.

i didnt mean to slap her though.i really didnt mean to.it just happened.i couldnt control myself and i kind of snapped but i really didnt mean to do it.like i said though some people already know i was dead serious and that when i get mad i end up laughing.i had to laugh it off or i would have done something else i would regret and plus it was her b-day so i definetely did not mean to do it but i couldnt control myself.

i feel kind of bad for doing that now to.

then alot of people kept asking me why i was pissed.yesterday thats when they saw the close to the last straw pissed very close.my math teacher pissed me off really bad and i slapped the door,stomped in to the room and refused to do work and i folded my arms and was just evil looking atleast one girl in my class thought i looked evil.

i was fuming mad though.then i tryed to read a book to calm down and he said no you cant read a book so i slamed it down and bretahed.i cant do shit becuase my parents think i should respct my elders and i would get hit...or worst......from not doing so.

i seriouly pretty much hate teachers.alot of them are grouchy assholes that love to ruin peoples lifes at least in my school.

bacck to lucnh.....i got a hug from him well i pretty much asked for a hug and he hugs me diffrently know and thats good since know i know hes is not like some other guys i know.....man whores.

i hugged him again before i left to.he smells good to.also those guys that stare at me are not pervs....atleast from what my crush told me.hes not my crush animore though hes adorable and thats all and i dont really like him like that so hes kind of an...friend but more of an aquantice.

my crush said he knows the guys and all so i guess their not perverted but if their not than whats up with all the straing and acting all weird around me sometimes.they act like their scared of me or something unless i creep them out.

i creep alot of people out though since most of the time i pop up out of nowhere but its funny.

at lunch i got to have fun i stayed inside for recess so yeah after lucnch i guess you can say.i was sining -the pack-in my car

i love that song. "im driving in my car"lol.i was just being goofy unlike last year when i was shy and stuff.now that side of me i hate alot.

i luv to have fun now but the teaches dont like the new me but screw them and my parents think im a follower becuase i was never like this before so screw them to.all becuase im diffrent that means im a follower.it pisses me off.

my parents always yell at me and say im "a fucking retard" alot but i dont care animore.i wish i was like all of you guys you all have freedom and plus i cant date until im 18.is their someway to move out when your 16?

i dont want to live with my parents animore and also im not one of them girls that say i hate my parents and then i actually "love them deep in my heart" bull.i actually dont like them.they piss me off alot and they dont even...i cant talk with them about shiot.


so off of that replies-

angelzakuro-thank you so much for the long comment *hugs*.i appreciate it alot ^^.yes im glad that he is getting better to and that he isnt paralyzed.since he is doing better i feel better and happier.lol.yep hes 18.welll for my family it is like that we quit giving peple gifts at a certain age the age range to get gifts is (infant-16) and thats when we stop giving gifts but i think my unlce epsically deserves a gift.
lol.we cant do hair in class animore now though becuase the principal who is annoying yelled at all of us at luch about it.
im glad that you liked my poem and thought that it was so good ^^.

lee radcliffe-my uncle got hit with a bullet....huh? i dont get this part "Maybe something came up... I mean, a problem..." a problem with what? yeah thats good advice.boys are heartbreakers....but im alittle over it.im glad you liked the poem to ^^.

fmarox66-*hugs*omg! thank you so much for visiting.i havent heard from you in what seems like 4ever.thank you for the nice comment ^^.thank you and im glad you liked my poem and thought it was good.yeah new people are cool but i like teasing the new boy but im just messing with him.i dont have a problem with him but i act like it.he seems nice but idk.

annie b.-lol.thanks ^^.i dont like doasinfinity anymore and i wish i could change this username but its no big deal.i luv eminem to and im glad you luv the music ^^.


tigerfantasy1-*huggles*thenk you for always visitng me.i appreciate it alot ^^.lol.yeah he is pretty young.i have young members in the family my old ones.....yeah.lol.it is hard to think of poems that already have a topic.i cant do it.what is your poem title? maybe i can help you come up with some ideas if you want.i had to do one for reading class but it actually came to me alittle fast but im used to writing about hearbreak and dark stuff not all that other sutff they make us write.im sure you can think of something though ^^.i wish you the best with it and i bet its going to come out great *hugs*


well thank you all for everything and have a great holiday






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Tuesday, December 18, 2007

thank you
thank you all for the nice comments about my situation.he is doing good as far as i know of and it was actually a kind of happy visit with sum jokes and all.

so im just glad hes okay but the bullet that hit him in the leg....well he would have been paralyzed but they had to do surgery and he should be able to move it now.

so im glad about that.im going to buy him something for christmas to even though he is 18 he still should get something.dont you think?

also my friend gets her hair done for free in clas lol.its funny.she always gets her hair done in class now.it like a beuaty salon and her hair is so cute to. alot of people did her hair to well 3 people fixed it.it was kind of funny though.

then when we were in class one girl in my class was like "your dad is going to kill you" and saying other smart stuff out her mouth to her and my friend was like "shut the fuck up biotch!" it was hilarious but im not use to her cussing though.usally she dont do that only when she gets pissed or something.

aniways today was pretty fun for me.we got a new boy yestaday and everyone is all on him.all the girls are trying to get his number and find out where he lives and giving him notes to date them.

its annoying.it shouldnt bother me but still.theyre desperate and im not that desparate.hes not really that cute either.

yesterday i seen one of the guys i like.well hes ne of the creppy dudes but he is pretty cute.

i havent seen those guys in a while which is good.i wonder about them at times.they have been watching me for a loong time like since i was in 4th grade and still watch me so its just plain old creppy.

um.....oh yeah i'll try to get to sum people tmrw *hugs every1* and heres my new poem-

razor with a twist

Hurting me like a razor with acid on the tip,
each and every time it digs through my skin,
acid burns me right to my bone
the pain is to much for me to endure,
burning through my skin,reaching my soul,
a call for help but no one hears me yell,
and as i fall into an dark abyss,
killing me slowly....the razor with a twist


i know it sucks bad dont it....oh well i guess my poetry skills are fading but ill still try...

have a great day and great holidays oh and thank you for the prayers to *hugs*
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Thursday, December 13, 2007

crisisT_T-cant visit
im sry but i cant visit.i know i havent been on in a while but....my uncle got shot and someone tryd to kill him.so im having a hard time dealing with it.so im sry about not being able to visit you all.i wish you the best of holidays snd hope your all well.i have to go now sry bye
*hugs*
Comments (3) | Permalink

Sunday, December 9, 2007

head hurts but i will survive lol
hiya hiya hi....lol.im a little hyper now don't know why but i am.my hands are tired from typing so much though since i got to every1 today pretty much evry1 that visited me and updated today.

sooo....im glad you guys liked my poem ^^.i appreciated the comments that you guys gave me ^^.

I've been....depressed lately but other than that Ive been okay i guess.ive had my happy moments though.lately I've been having nightmares for pretty much the whole month and i haven't had 1 good dream yet.in one dream my crush flicked me of when i was calling for him because i wanted to talk with him and i told him "fuck you to then biotch" lol.it was a little funny but when i woke up i was sad about it and plus its weird how i can tell him off in my dreams but in real life i never gather the courage to cuss him out when he treats me bad.

last night i had a nightmare and it was very bloody and i was a dead girl in the dream.it was creepy.

oh...i so forgot hes not my crush anymore haha.i don't like him anymore since he is such an asshole and a liar.

other people don't even know when hes lying but i can easily tell.he makes a certain face when he lies but other people don't even know.its weird even one of his best freidns cant even tell when hes lying...wow...

so off of that jerk.oh yah i also forgeot lol um well friday night i went to the convient with my dad and i seen one of the guys that i say "hey" to just messing around and all and hes the one that lives in the creppy house across the street from the school....you know one of the 18-19 year old guys that always stare at me and well i felt like the air got knocked out of me when i seen him and i was panicky and i started walking slower and i felt like i could hardly breathe

the guy looked my way to and i looked and the ground and pulled my hood up on my head.

then i seen him in the store and i felt dizzy but he didnt see me then until he went to the front and he looked at me like a quick glance and then he rushed out the store.its weird how all of that jerks friend rush out the store when they see me.

i felt better after he left though.so yeah....thats all i got to say....i hope you guys all have a great early christmas to lol ^^.

i appreciate the comments so much though.thank you all again ^^

pics-

























alex evans is hawt!




i DONT need him!























creppy


ellie on left and paige on right

ellie and sean

ellie is awesome

omg!i luv ellies hair here.





fer sure maybe fer sure not fer sure eh fer sure bomb lol


















ellie nashville

kiki cannibal










guin davis-








cool thingy but labls are stupid





alex evans-

































audrey kitching-

audrey is at the end,jac vanek is next to her and the girl that sitting next to jac vanek is prolly hanna beth









chris chaos














brooklyn belgrave-








hannah beth doll that i made-


hannah beth-


hannah beth right and jac vanek left-


emilia-






my friend trina made this-trina's the doll on the left im the soll on the right ^^


imoguen heap-


izzy hilton-


jac vanek-




mr myspace and kiki cannibal kissing and kiki cannibals sister dakota rose holding ballons-






the omen kid- co cute yet evil lol






hanna beth-










tori unicorn-


audrey kitching-
























Kiki and Dakota - Oompa Loompa Lungs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RnB4FlfxubI&feature=related

have a great day







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