Birthday • 1989-02-23 Gender •
Male Location • The States Member Since • 2005-05-10 Occupation • Collage Real Name • David
Personal
Achievements • Surviving Anime Fan Since • 1995 Favorite Anime • Inuyasha, Wolfs Rain, FullMetal Alchemist, Naruto, Fruits basket, and other Animes Goals • To become the best at a lot of things and to make up for past sins... Hobbies • Playing vid games, snowboarding, working out Talents • Soccer, some school work, having women attracted to me (sadly), so on...
myOtaku.com: DarkWolfDemon
Welcome to my site archives. 10 posts are listed per page.
Welcome to today.
Listening to: I need to get music. -_-‘
Feels: tired but less tired
The family did abit of cleaning today of the house. Too lights down and the tree down and put away Christmas stuff. I also went to the mall and went to see a movie when I got there there was only on about to start and it was the princess and the frog and it was a good movie, I usually don’t like singing and dancing in movies but I loved it in this movie.
It was supposed to get below freezing tonight so we had to run the pipes to keep the water in them from freezing.
Fight the power and question the criminals in the government.
Sorry; cannot think of much else so I will copy what I posted yesterday.
“More Obama bashing. : ) Ok; when I first saw him I didn’t know who he was and I didn’t really give a damn. But I didn’t like him as I listed to him on the news; like the crazy promises he promised and the things he wanted to do didn’t feel right and especially since he seemed to have a cult crowd following him and worshiping the ground he walked on. When he became president oh god! He said he would be transparent but his group are keeping us out of the room as they rush this current bill, transparent as mud. He wants to make pass this country changing bill and they are doing this by rushing it before we can see it and bribing people to accept it. It is also iffy how I do not like him while most newspapers and Tv news are praising him as the messiah who will bring greatness to the world and anyone who questions him are racists and ignorant. It also doesn't make me feel good when I see he is surrounded by people that say themselves that they are communists and socialists, people who are radicals, and people who want to fundamentally change America for the greater good no matter what the means to get to their utopia. Yes people voted for him; thought it might have been at the end of a night stick which was in the hands of the Black Panther party. There might have been a few dead people that voted for Obama thanks to his good old pals at voter registration organizations like Acorn.
To the people who would think that I wouldn't like Obama because he is black; there are many many many things that can make one person not like another and I just don't like him.
Ok; youtube now works with my site so I am posting a video on how he says one thing and does another.
”
Welcome to today.
Listening to: site music
Feels: tired
Nothing much is happening recently, just bored. Wish I was spending my break well like going out with friends or doing something more than sitting on my ass in front of the tv. -_-
More Obama bashing. : ) Ok; when I first saw him I didn’t know who he was and I didn’t really give a damn. But I didn’t like him as I listed to him on the news; like the crazy promises he promised and the things he wanted to do didn’t feel right and especially since he seemed to have a cult crowd following him and worshiping the ground he walked on. When he became president oh god! He said he would be transparent but his group are keeping us out of the room as they rush this current bill, transparent as mud. He wants to make pass this country changing bill and they are doing this by rushing it before we can see it and bribing people to accept it. It is also iffy how I do not like him while most newspapers and Tv news are praising him as the messiah who will bring greatness to the world and anyone who questions him are racists and ignorant. It also doesn't make me feel good when I see he is surrounded by people that say themselves that they are communists and socialists, people who are radicals, and people who want to fundamentally change America for the greater good no matter what the means to get to their utopia. Yes people voted for him; thought it might have been at the end of a night stick which was in the hands of the Black Panther party. There might have been a few dead people that voted for Obama thanks to his good old pals at voter registration organizations like Acorn.
To the people who would think that I wouldn't like Obama because he is black; there are many many many things that can make one person not like another and I just don't like him.
Ok; youtube now works with my site so I am posting a video on how he says one thing and does another.
Welcome to today.
Listening to: actually watching videos
Feels: ...um...meh
Sorry for not posting yesterday.
It’s been pretty cold around here in Texas; defiantly not as cold as Colorado or Nebraska but it is cold. But my father has the heat on high. It’s odd how then its winter time people heat up the house a lot but during the summer when it is very very hot they are more stingy when wanting to cool things down.
At first I didn't like the government, now I hate it. Democrats are messing up a lot of things. For one Obama said that there would be transparency; yah, as transparent as mud.
Something I saw on tv gave me a chill. It was a survival show showing this guy living threw a pandemic and then when society has collapsed how bad things will be. It is kinda spooky because when in my life I didn’t have electricity or water things just didn’t go well and this was for a few hours. In the current state of the world I should probably prepare for an apocalypse, with Obama and fighting an possible diseases and things. I would like to get a gun, a years’ worth of imperishable food, and a supply kit for medical and everything I would need just in case the world collapses anytime soon.
The rome game was about building cities and recruting troops in a turn based game while you can command thos troops to fight other armies in a real time stratagy setting.
Welcome to today.
Listening to: …I need to listen to something
Feels: relieved and tired
Did the same thing today as I did yesterday; I need to find something to do. -_- I have been playing abit of Team fortress 2 and a lot of Rome: total war; I have gained the popularity of the people and soon I will make civil war on Rome!!!...got carried away there. ^^’
I saw this show on tv called “teen mom” and god I am glad I haven’t…you know, because I would probably have to be with some other person and a baby. Their life is really bad. Having to take care of a kid alone or with someone you fight with, a crying baby (I know they do but I don’t like most children, but some are cute), cannot get educated or work full time, and the parents are usually as dumb as a sack of hammers. When (or more of if) I get a child I want one when I am married and have a well paying job; somewhere in my late 20’s to 30’s. But thankfully not anytime soon. ^^
I am going to fogo de chao which is a nice restaurant where you flip your thing green and people bring you all the meat you want and many types of meat till you flip it red; if you are hungry when you leave you are not doing it right. It might sound abit odd like an all you can eat buffet but it’s really fancy.
I was to look into myself and write it down; cuz I am curious. I think I am alittle obsessive compulsive (aka think of the show “Monk”). I am over protective, curious, like talking sometimes and then hate talking. I am shy but when I know the person I am an open person.
To alphonse13’s question; the girl I like already knows because I was her boyfriend and then we broke up. I still wish to be with her though.
Speaking of her though I looked back on photos that I uploaded and saw a little thing I wrote. “I am jealous of every guy that has ever hugged you because, for just one moment, they held my entire world.”
Ok; today I got some new shoes which were like the last ones except in a different color and not a few years old. I also got fancy pants because we are going to go out to some restaurant and I didn’t bring any; it was funny how dad had me try on the clothes and my lil sis was bored to tears from me shopping for clothes. : p
The days seem to be going together since I don’t seem to be doing much but hang around and do things on the computer and watch tv; it’s pretty much the only thing I can do around here. Its kinda lonely.
I had a whole post up on how I missed someone and what happened but I thought it would be better if I didn’t talk about it. In other news I am really really tired lately. I should try going to sleep earlier or staying in bed longer; at least I don’t have any early classes in collage, I hated waking up at 6 while it was still dark to go to classes.
Don’t trust the government. Read or watch 1984, V for Vendetta, or any other movie/book when the government takes control of the population.
Anyways I thought of more resolutions; keep & reconnect with old friends. ^^
On getting a girlfriend part it is harder because I am in a collage where men outnumber women by 3 to 1 and a lot of women are taken and if they aren’t there is probably something wrong with them. For me there is only one woman that I want.
Welcome to today.
Listening to:
Feels: tired, alittle better
I took a look back on some old posts and god they are old. It was odd seeing how I would post every day and then I was slowing down and they it grinded to a halt. I also saw a hated day Tuesday, August 5, 2008. (give or take a day)
I need to think up New Year’s revolutions…I mean resolutions. ^^’
1. Get a girlfriend
2. Do well in collage
3. Get more ripped and a 6 pack
4. Get more friends
5. Fix myself
Getting a girlfriend, that's a far cry but it would be nice to have someone close to me that I can tell my secrets to and cuddle with and etc. Doing well is just practicing and hope to learn to have fun with it. Getting ripped is easy; just continue eating well and working myself to the bone. Getting more friends…I guess shaking people’s hands and talking to people more often and be friendlier. To fix myself it to post on here and get things out so I can be better and get alone time and soul searching.
For some reason someone is saying things that I would want someone else to say to me. It’s odd and unusual. Right now I just feel lost within myself. One moment I am very happy and another moment I am depressed, must be bi-polar or something. -_-‘
This is a long video; not even half of it and it’s an hour. It’s shocking to see how Obama looks on this. I don’t like his or his ideals.
Ok; no videos again...For some reason it stretches the site. I'll try to fix it sometime. -_-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAaQNACwaLw&feature=player_embedded
How do you like my post background picture? Its a picture from a good friend of mine of me. ^^
For new years I went to my step-mom’s friend or cousin’s place for the new years party. I at first thought it would be loud and boring but it was kinda fun. We saw a few pictures the family had when they went to Las Vegas; and they had a little child which was cute as he was playing with a ball and crawling around. When it was new years we did the thing where you drink 12 grapes and wine (but I got apple juice -_-‘); some kind of superstitious thing. We bought some fireworks and shot a few before the police came and told us we could only shoot a few more, we shot the one that shoots a lot and then we left. ^^’ It was really cold and windy outside which sucked because I didn’t have a jacket. 0_o
And then all the children came over to our house to sleep; oddly enough they are all guys.
Looking into yourself can help with your life. Like awhile ago I found out that the reason I am spooked when I am in an airplane flying is because I hate leaving people I know and I also don’t like to go to new places. It still creeps me out when the plane makes cracking sounds but I am not afraid of airplanes anymore. : )
I have been having vivid dreams lately and its making reality feel odd. I guess I need to get outside and make my mind think; and also a good long sleep.
Does anyone have an idea for the background if my site?
This is from team fortress 2; a game I love and the character from it I love. ^^ It’s called Ignis Solus which means burn alone; and man I know that feeling.
EDIT: Putting the video on made the site mess up so I'll just post the link. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PS6DXup1blw
I am having some trouble with my life. I am a person of regrets and I regret a lot. Does anyone out there know how to not regret?
Welcome to today.
Listening to: I'm gonna be a one man cheeseburger apocalypse!!! (not a song; just a saying ^^’)
Feels: between two worlds
Ok. So I was at my mother’s and spent Christmas there and it was a good Christmas. I got clothes, dvd’s, money, and some more stuff at my dad’s. Being that I traveled to my dad’s place a few days ago. I am kinda bummed since I have not worked out in a week; I really want to work my muscles and feel the burn. I hate the thought of being lazy, fat, out of shape, and useless. Also I don’t have a car here so I cannot really do much of my own being. I dunno why I stay up so late; I guess I feel more active at night but I hate wasting the day when I wake up at 10 am and missed the good morning. It has rained here recently which is good because I love the rain and where I usually live we don’t get much rain; and if all then it is snow, but snow is good. ^^
My father and I moved things around in my little sisters room since she wanted a change of scene. Found a few books that I used to own and it felt odd when they said that they were going to give them or throw them away. I am sentimental so I like keeping things that mean something to me; while my father is unsentimental, would probably throw his father’s ashes in the trash if he was dead.
Got Left 4 dead 2 and its fun but the people I played with it sucked. -_- Like I healed someone and then they shot me; and another time the same person left me…4 dead (odd eh); and we were at the end of one of the campaigns and then they switched it before we completed it. Interesting game though; more fluid and more stuff. The scariest thing in perspective is the pregnant looking spitter; she spits acid at people. Look at the comic above for a comic about the game.
I am friends with a friend again which is good; but there is also a bad side to it but it’s private.
Oh; I also got my grades! I got an A in Calc 2, a B in geology, and a C in Statics (physics with non-moving objects) and into to law (yes they have law in an engineering school).
I have been having a lot of dreams lately which wouldn’t be bad but they are affecting my sense of reality and its really messing me up. Like I will dream about a day I had but it went differently and I have to really think if I did that or what. And also some weird dreams that I cannot remember. God I need more sleep; I am so tired. -_-
I need to change he theme here; it was nice but it isn’t me. Gtg; its late and I love sleep.
Welcome to today.
Listening to: sound of nature (not a song, just nature)
Feels: good
Sorry for not posting in forever; my excuse is lazyness and forgetfulness.
Long time short: made up with Wolftrest, traveled to mom's place to spend christmas, Obama and his cronies suck, think I did average on my exams, resting up.
I'll post more tommorow. Merry Christmas!
Welcome to today.
Listening to: Moskau (to feel better)
Feels: low -.-
I refuse to die; I refuse to go quietly into the night; life does exist.
WARNING: This post is about relationship problem so if you don’t want to hear me bitch them just comment with something like “cool post ^^”.
No such luck.
I fought with someone close to me and right now I am paying the price. I must be a messed up creep because after a fight I sent an apology message saying how sorry I am and that should be the last time I talk with her; an at this moment I am at the edge of my seat wishing she would reply. I doubt it though because after a fight it isn’t easy to just talk to the person and two I told her not to talk with me so I cannot make her feel bad, I at least hope it’s working. I look back on those years when we were together and ask myself when I didn’t try everything to stay with her.
I have usually thought there was a line between obsession and love, that being that the only difference is the perspective. So get two people that love each other and would never leave each other’s side; one falls out of love and the other looks like a crazy person.
The thing was that I was never really close with my family, distance and relationship wise. When she came along we became quick friends and then I asked her out and she accepted especially since she liked me as well. Even though we were miles apart she was the closest person to me. We spent countless hours emailing each other and talking to each other on the phone; I told her many things about me and she did the same. Even if we didn’t have much to talk about she still made my day wonderful by just talking to her.
We broke up a few times and about a year ago it was my fault. I made her feel really bad and did little to go after her. It kills me everyday knowing that I had a wonderful loving woman by my side and…I lost her. It’s hard to explain right now because I feel emotional about this subject, and a guy usually doesn't feel emotional.
We were friends a few days ago but I messed up. I don’t know; I guess I never really thought of expressing myself to her. Mainly asking questions like how her day was, trying to make conversation, telling her to be safe and not walk down dark alleys, trying to convince her that having money is really nice, trying to figure her out and know more about her and her past. I just…I donno. I ask her how her say was to make conversation because I like talking with her. I tell her to not do risky things because I wouldn’t know what to do if something happened to her, she is the most I have ever had. I hear lots of things on tv and other like murders and raping and gangs and stuff and I wish there was someone to protect her. I like her having money because I would like her to live with than without; I want her to be able to enjoy life like any other person; and me being a person with money its one of the few things I have in life that I would also want her to have but without the loneliness it seems to bring with it. I want to know more about her because I just do; I want to be close to her by knowing her from favorite color to what they got on their 5th birthday (ok now I sound like a creep -_-). I also do things like give her thumbs up on things and comment on her stuff because I like things like pictures and stuff; and getting a “good job” from someone is a nice thing I hope; hell, when she congratulates me on things I do I feel really happy.
I also do pester her about not talking to me much. I do it because I send a message and without getting one back I see things like she submitted art and updated things and it shouldn’t be hard to understand when that happens you feel sad; that someone will do other things instead of talking to you. I now know to some extent of what I put her thru. We seem to me acting a lot alike, with her a year ago and me now; but I am the one bitching about it. -_- Time seems to move slowly without her, each day without her feeling like a week and each week feeling like a month and so on. I just miss her a lot and I really hate not talking to her.
I guess the reason I was so distance with her was because I was stressed, afraid of commitment, afraid of spending my entire life with someone (remember I was never close to someone and am afraid of getting close to people), didn’t like loving someone from afar, busy with collage, and a few other things. But that stuff doesn't excuse me for what I did.
I have tried to get over her but after a year of trying I don’t have the luck. I just wish I could have her by my side once again, waking up to her messages and coming home from collage to her messages and then talking to her for an hour on the phone before going to sleep. But that isn’t likely because I bet everyone she knows hates me now and I would think she doesn’t feel too highly about me now. I wanted her to be happy, safe, and be close to her.
*sighs*
Look at me trying to convince myself that the things I do/did are justified. I am an underdeveloped worthless person. I could say more about how bad I am but it would be me blubbering in my internet journal, so I will keep it to myself.
In other news I have 4 exams; two on Monday, one of Tuesday, and one on Wednesday. Afterwards I am going home to my mother and then my father’s for new years & Christmas; I am not really looking forward to it. I have grown less fond of my family since not too long ago. Also Obama has gotten the Nobel peace prize for…being an elected democrat president in truth; he had been the president for a few months before they said he did enough peace stuff to be a Nobel peace prize person, which was nothing since he hadn’t been president long.
Well, here is a video that usually makes me feel better.
