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Saturday, May 26, 2007

Friday. May, 26th

First off, thanks for your supportive words, everyone. It's been a very tough month. My parents will be alright, just so you know. And I did manage to save a lot of pictures from the house, which I'm very grateful for.

I wanted to say a special thanks to Mimmi, Shadow, and Sahki, for being extra supportive. I really appreciated that extra bit of effort, you guys. Thanks a lot.

I wish I could say alls well that ends well. But... I can't. I haven't talked to my parents in a few days, and I haven't decided if I ever will. We've had a bit of a falling out. One that's years overdue. The people that raised me, died a long time ago, and I can't take the people that are left. I think this was the right thing to do. It needed to be done to save what's left of my sanity. Trust me, I'm holding on to that by a thread these days. But even though I've grown apart from the awful parents my parents have turned out to be today, I never imagined it would be so incredibly hard to turn my back. Or how confusing and soul dampening it could be. On one side I have a moral obligation and a justifiable cause to do this, as well as trying to save my life and my own sanity. But on the other, my childhood memories, the few good ones that I have anyway, just won't settle down. It's not like my childhood was terribly happy and I spent half of it afraid of my mother, but... my father used to be a nice guy. Used to be, being the key phrase there.

Bah. Confused yet? Yeah well, so am I. I don't really feel like getting into what's going on in detail. Not yet anyway, I just can't. I need a little time to sort out what I'm feeling. If I ever can. This is the kind of stuff no one should have to go through.

Because we demand more Firefly

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