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Friday, February 1, 2008


   For Once ...
i think
i can'r be sure
and i hope i don't jinx this
but for once i think i am mostley happy
home life still effin sux
{more than usual}
and school is school
and i did cry a few days ago
and i mean everything isn't even near good like anyone else would think it
but this is me and this is the best its been
in a long long while
so
shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
don't tell anyone
lolz
<3




and max i still lub you for the tape lolz but i lub you anyways

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   My Sad Sad Atempt Ay Something
well in my english class we had to write poems
so this is my sad sad atempt at one
a lot of people liked it and thought it was deep
{i was just writing about the stuff that goes through my head everyday}
but it doesn't really rhym
{hense sad sad atempt lolz}
anyway here it is:

Tear drops don't ever stop.
The rain desguises, and smiles do hide them.
Children hurt, mothers cryin', and people dyin'
Stop the pain and chill the soul, make all emotions stone cold
What has the world come to now a days?
What are parents sapposed to say, when children ask:
why daddys gone and why mommy is never home?
Why are the "forced" to live on there own?
People only caring about themselves.
Do they seriously not care about anybody else?
It seems the world is full of lies, it only seems right to cry ...
with tear drops that don't ever stop.

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Wednesday, January 23, 2008


   Grrr It Feels Like A Really Bad Soap Opra
lolz well yeah
i like 5 guys
3 of wich like me back
but i'm not daiting them
meanwhile one of my close friends like me
and my old bestfriend who isn't my bestfriend anymore likes me apparently from what people are telling me
and my mom kinda sorta hates one of my best friends
its sooooooooo gay
....
i hate it
anyway yeah i hope this is all over soon

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Sunday, January 20, 2008


   Maybe ....
yeah well i dumped my bf today
yeah wich is good
cuz ... it just was ...
anyway lolz
there is already thid other guy i might go out with soon
and it wasn't ment to end up like that
but yeah it kinda did
i mostly doubt me and this other guy will go out
idk why i just do
anyway i might be getting my hair died soon lolz
that will be funn
i just wish my best friend was still with me its always comforting havig her around ^^
guess thats why she is my bestfriend
and today is my other bestfriends b~day
wish i coulda been with him on it ...
o well stuff happens
and i think i am sapposed to call my other friend back before seven so he will tell me who likes me but whatever ...
this kinda stuff doesn't get me all like i wanna know i wanna know
it kinda does but not really ...
anyway i have relized i just about like 3 guys at all times
hmmmm is that weird
well anyway i am gonna go ttyl

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Tuesday, January 15, 2008


   Home
I'm home sick
so yeah
i'm bored
lolz
^^

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Sunday, January 13, 2008


   This Was A Good Weekend
I actually had a great weekend
starting at frieday after school till now
this is awesome lolz
^^
well yeah thats about all

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Tuesday, January 8, 2008


   Freaking Fish!
lolz no this post isn't about a fish
just my friend whos name is the same name as a fish lolz
anyway she comes to school today wearing my fav jacket EVER! because she ordered it online
i know she did because you can't buy that jacket at hot topic anymore
enless you go for a two and a half hour drive
or
buy it on the net
and that is like my signature jacket
well it was before my grandma cut the sleves off
but i am getting the sleves back on and anyway
she comes to school wearing one just like it
and expects me to happy with her
NO!
she tells me her sis gave it to her but i know she didn't because her sis would never give here anything like that
anyway she looks like a fucking poser with it on
also like 3 of my other friends are pissed at her for it
oh and she took it off today and tells me she did it because there was blood on the rists from her sister cutting
Well.....
why the hell would you where a jacket to school with blood on the rists like cutting if you weren't the person that cut?!
why would you where that to school anyway?!
ok pluss the jacket is white
so if she where the jacket to school again {big if}
and there is no blood on it i will know she is lying because the jacket is white and you can't get dried blood out of something white
EVER!!!
i've tried
so anyway if she does ever where her {"my"} jacket to school again sware to gawd i won't tal to her for 2 days instead of just one
and i know i may seem a lil over dramatic but you don't know how much she freaking does this to me!
next thing i know she is gonna sneak into my house and steal my cloths so she can where them lolz
Oh and after school today she wouldn't stop calling me or the friend i was with no matter how many times we hung up on her/didn't answer our phones lolz
she can't take a fucking hint!
lolz anyway i am done venting now...

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Monday, January 7, 2008


   WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
yeah
my besy friend wasn't really even mad
that makes me happy ^^
lolz
well anyway ...
this guy that i was friends with
is hanging out with one of my old bestfriends
and me and him hate eacother now
exept we are kinda friends not really
... ANYWAY ...
he had been haning out with my ex~bestfriend
and now he doesn't like me {as a friend} anymore
{my ex~bestfriend is alwayz talking shit about me
even though people have told me that he still really
[really really] likes me}
i doubt he hates me ... but he might
...
so yeah oh
and kiki likes our best friend again
{for the 4th time} lolz
i hope she doesn't go out with him again

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Sunday, January 6, 2008


Can't Do This
I hate myself right now
i have for like idk a month maybe i'm not entirley sure
i messed up again
not bad {i think} and i am gonna do the right thing and confront it
but i'm scared because i worked hard to change what i was
{if you are one of my good friends you would know this}
and yet i fucked that up so perfectly
i'm scared about what my consiqueces are going to be
and its not like consiquecis like grounding or something like that its way diffrent
{way worse in a way}
and i wanna start fixing it right now but i have to wait untill i can see this person in person lolz
and know i didn't offend or hurt anyway i just possibly lost or hurt the friendship with the best friend i am pretty sure i ever had
and its killing me inside
because i have almost lost this person before and now we are closer and yeah we fixed it last time but if i keep fucking up things aren't going to get fixed
just wish me luck
because if this works out ... I am never gonna even risk fucking up again!
ever!
i feel sooo bas and am sooo sorry
... believe me ...

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Saturday, December 29, 2007


   Yeah I Broke My Digital Camera
lolz well i did
I am gonna get it fixed though
and thats about it
lolz
i know my posts are pretty boring latley
hopefully it will livin up sooon lolz

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