Monday, September 23, 2013
Sorry for the long absence and not saying anything. I really needed to get my head cleared. I've been having a lot of issues that haven't been going away for me, and I've been trying to eliminate toxic people and things from my life. I just needed to know who would still stand by me even when I'm gone or ill or even completely uncooperative. I still don't know whose friend or foe. I've so far had two relationships within the year, and they all failed within months. I have no one. I wish I was better at meeting people and friends. Everytime I try to talk to someone I bail out of fear but then when I try to reconnect it is already too late. I'm not sure at what I'm doing with myself at this point or what I'm worth. I've had constant thoughts of dorpping out of school. I've gotten my first job over the summer, but it was only a summer position, and I am currently finding out how insufficient I am at finding and keeping a job. I just need a sign that somewhere someone really cares. That is all. Don't be alarmed if I am gone for a long while the next time. It just means that I am still healing from what is going on in me.