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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The last ones are usually dragged along the longest.
10月 14日 「火曜日」
"I'm so far along and I just don't need you."
I think I'm going to go ahead and let the Rick guy from my art class know that I have a girlfriend. If I haven't mentioned Rick, he's this thirty-something year old guy who's been trying to get in my pants since the third week of school, and I don't want to showcase my sexual orientation to my class mates or my "marital status," but it's really getting to the point where I don't know what to do with him anymore. Ha-ha.

He's trying to invite himself everywhere I go, and constantly trying to get me to go places, and I think if I weren't such a hermit and I knew his prime goal wasn't just to get me to sleep with him, I wouldn't mind. Maybe. I mean, Charlie can only use "double team" for so long.

I think the only things I dread about that drawing class are seeing Rick and trying to avoid from gawking at Collin. She was wearing some goofy rainbow belt the other day and I was wondering what that was about, because I'm positive she isn't so fashionably challenged that she'd wear something like that. I mean, considering the rest of her attire . o ." for any of you who have rainbow belts. Ha-ha.

I think it's my fault--that I'm leading him on in some way. If not leading him on, I've been allowing him some hope. Because I'm not mean enough to tell him the truth, that he creeps both Justin and myself out very badly, and I also have a tendency to pretend I'm amused by people (for long periods of time) which actually causes more damage than spare feelings.

Anyway, oh~ho. At the fair, there was a booth with three older ladies behind it, next to cardboard cut-outs of good 'ol 'Cain and that Palin lady (which was sort of cute). It was getting late and we were all bored, so I approached it with 'The C's' in tow and asked for information on the propositions. One of the women pulled out pamphlets for me and started giving me the gist of them all.

I pointed out Prop 8 specifically and asked her to explain it to me and she went, "That's the proposition to constitute that marriage should only be between a man and a woman." After she realized Courtney had her arms around me, the lady dropped the papers down so quickly, it was sort of funny.

I only said, "Well that'd be unfortunate if it went through." I sort of wanted to laugh in this sad way. She didn't want to even be touching the same paper a gay was holding. Was my curiosity being insulting?

Ah--'Nough of that, though.
I've thought it over, and I think I'm going to surgically remove myself from myO like theOtaku did. -betrayal-

I've got a list of other sites I've been neglecting, and so I think I'll start using one of those.
I need to thicken the line between my real life and the internet world though.
It's going to have to start with getting rid of some things.
And I think first in line is this site.

Mood: Stable
Listening to: Myself destroying lyrics. xD
Reading: My Speech Textbook [again]

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Sunday, October 12, 2008

A Little Short on Solar
10月 12日 「日曜日」
So I've decided: People who know you too well suck.
Honest 'to blog,' it's true. Ha-ha. I dislike when you tell your best friend, "I have a crush on so and so," and they smile at you (or smirk) and go, "I knew it."

Especially if you haven't given any sign that you might have even been interested in that other person's existence. 'Cause I didn't. I don't think I give those kinds of signs for anybody. Anyway, back to my point:

That's almost, kind of, slightly irritating.

What's more is I haven't mentioned anything about the person more than a couple of times, and they were really just odd observations. I even waited a couple of weeks before saying it out loud. I've brought her up once. You remember the other girl with the boy name? Collin?

"Collin's really pretty, but it's hard to see past the aura of bitch sometimes."
"-Enter something generic Cota would say-"
"I think I like her."
"I knew it."

- ~ -"

Is it only funny to me why the majority of people around me have names that start with C? Cota, Courtney, Casey, Collin...And I'm Charlie. Justin's got a middle name somewhere that even starts with a C. Two years ago it was a stampede of J's.

Anyway, I'm off to the fair with the group of C's--minus Collin, mind you. That'd be really odd having the wife and Collin in the same area.

J+C+C 2008 Best Friends Forever.

Mood: I have a headache. :)
Listening to: Tegan and Sara - This Is Everything (Live) --I'm really starting to enjoy their live performances more than the studio-recorded songs. Cota thinks they sound awful, but I'm finding the imperfect qualities of it to be the best part. -ultra lame-

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Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Slow Train
10月 08日 「水曜日」
I've discovered why it is I weigh so little now.
I have nearly no muscle mass whatsoever. D<
Cota and I hardly ever do any amount of physical activity, so the simple--one time--rock climbing event took a toll on both our bodies. I am sore from the Trapezius muscle to my forearms. My legs are a little sore too, but I think that was from my jogging this morning.

I went out to eat with Justin and Casey after class let out and Casey attempted some strange back-popping maneuver on me that I didn't ask for, which put me in more whiny pain. To make up for it she gave me a massage and I was like, "@ ~ @ Casey, I'm taking you home with me." I really wanted to steal her. - ~ - Her massages are lovely.

And, y'know. Who doesn't want a brilliant white girl in their house giving them massages while going on absurd rants?

There's a plan to return to the fair this coming up weekend, and we will apparently get in free. I'm not going anywhere near the rock wall. ._."

Anyway, it's midnight and I have been up since five A.M. I actually feel a little tired--so I'm going to try and sleep without any pills. (I've probably jinxed myself now by pointing that out.) Wish me luck.

The pollution really illuminates the setting sun. :D I really like the camera on Justin's iPhone. It's magical compared to mine. I bug him every time I see something I want to photograph.

--Also, yes Tori, that /is/ me and your bby. We lead double lives, did you know?

Mood: Sleepy
Listening to: Tegan and Sara - This Is Everything

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Monday, October 6, 2008

Etiology: Acrophobia
10月 06日 「月曜日」
Rock climbing is ridiculously difficult.
And the fair is full of slow walkers. I only went on one ride, and risked having my phone fly off by taking it out to try and take photos of the fairground from high up on that spinning-swing-of-doom thing. The pictures all came out blurry. Who would have guessed?

Poor quality resizing = Blurry fail.

Anyway, I had some things to bring up, but I can't remember any of it now.

I was staring at a mural on the second floor of the art building the other day and a lady, who I didn't notice was watching me, stopped what she was doing with her paintings and approached me. It actually sort of startled me. She came right next to me and said, "I'm really surprised they haven't painted over this." And I turned to look at her, realizing she was about three inches away from my face (not exaggerating), and felt a bit uncomfortable but just asked, "What do you mean?" And she began telling me how she and a girl named Jessica had put it up two years ago, and the school administration, along with the rest of Fresno made such a big controversy over it. The painting held Anarcho-Capitalism themes that I didn't notice until I started reading all the writing.

I didn't have much to say about it, though. Two years ago I was too self-absorbed to take notice of what was going on around town. She started explaining other murals around campus that she's worked on and after awhile walked off mumbling things about Jessica. I suspect that the murals have ended now that Jessica's at another school and remarried to her husband... Ha-ha.

People really let too much information leak out in small conversation.

A little while after that, a girl in the bathroom with charcoal smeared on her face started talking to me, too. I saw her getting her revenge on the person who had done that to her before we went in to wash our hands, and she was telling me about the incident. Then she giggled and said she was plotting to pour a vat of fake blood on the boy. I wasn't sure why she was letting me in on her devious plan, but I laughed; wished her luck with that; then went outside.

Art students are oddly talkative. . o ."

Mood: Caffeinated
Listening to: Blue October - "Let It Go"
Reading: Speech Textbook (Attempt at being studious)

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Thursday, October 2, 2008

A Little Less Than Innocuous
10月 02日 「木曜日」
My phone has died again.
I think I'll be having it traded in for an iPhone. I mean, it's a maybe. Two Blackberries have failed me now. Oh, and not to let disappointment wain for even a moment, the boots I was hoping to get have suddenly disappeared off the face of the internet world as well.

I don't know how I will live.

Anyway, I am off to bed.
I felt like bantering on about someone from my Bio class...but my sleeping aide is really kicking in now. Meh.

I suppose I'll share anyway, since I've already begun. Also, it's totally bugging me:

A lady, during lab, was ranting about how she couldn't wait for the talk of evolution to come up. And I know I wasn't a part of the conversation, but my ears perked up at the mentioning of "evolution." Then she proceeded to bash the whole theory itself, and I'm not even certain she knows who Charles Darwin is. She claims to "attend many seminars on Mormonism and Evolution, just to prove them wrong." ...Her reasoning against the question of our tail bones was: "That's nothing. It's just something between your ass crack."

...You'd think if you were going to bash something so controversial, loud enough for everyone in the room to hear, you'd have better points than that. - ~ - "

She also went on about being a hardcore believer of creation and what a big Christian she was and I was thinking: Okay, looks shouldn't matter, but I can't really picture someone who models for a beer company (that's her job apparently), and tans so much her skin is orange, really strikes me as a big "God person."

You have an image of her in your head, right? Bleached platinum blond hair, horribly overdone acrylic nails, tiny skirts, big sunglasses? Big stupid McCain poster on the back of her car?

Yeah. D: <

After the lab came our lecture, where she interrupted at some point to ask for confirmation on whether or not dog saliva contained something special in it. Because she had a cut on her ankle that she swears healed the next day because her dog licked it.

The woman saying that evolution is bull, God is all, and anyone who believes in anything besides that is stupid, also believes dog spit heals wounds. :D

Kay, I'm going to bed.

(No one's been very active this week.)

Mood: Drained//Irritated
Listening to: Death Cab For Cutie - "Some Day You Will Be Loved"
Drinking: H2O

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Tuesday, September 30, 2008

There's No Difference Between a Syringe and a Mug
9月 29日 「月曜日」
Don't let myO fool you, it's still Monday the 29th for another 40 minutes or so.

I just got out of my Speech class not too long ago. The first thing I did when I got home was enter the kitchen to give the air-tight jar, that we keep our coffee beans in, a good shake. It's been empty for the past several days, rendering me caffeine-less and forcing me to drink instant coffee... -shame-

...So you don't understand how happy I was when I heard the good 'ol familiar sound of beans shaking about in that under-appreciated jar. :D

Anyway, this some how precedented me to cook breakfast-for-dinner.
Unorthodox, maybe, but I hadn't had anything else to eat all day, if that justifies my reasoning to make pancakes at all.

- ~ -

So...it seems I enjoy Mondays very much. Mondays are the only days I meet with my Speech professor, Dr. Harriet. He's neat, and the class is amusing to me. Also[!] I share that class with both Mat and Justin.

Last week we had to partner up with someone we didn't know and engage in forced conversation. ..Ha-ha. Dr. Harriet guided us through it, making us ask each other different things. I was "Person B" because I like even numbers and B is the second letter of the alphabet. "Person A" was a kid named Marsha who, I explained to some people, made me want to hug her after the activity was over. Her life seemed pretty screwed up and she comes off as such a sweet person.

She's very optimistic too, which I find is cute in a very nauseating way..not to mention it's really weird. Considering people in those situations usually come out like...my sister. -_-" Ha-ha.

This week we partnered up again, but I think I enjoyed last week's questions better. The things we had to ask each other today dealt with conflicts and "love," which I found very difficult to discuss. ._."

I like talking to Marsha, though. My cousin, Mat, had a girl from Russia as his partner. I can't remember how, but I ended up introducing myself to her at some point. I think it was because Mat kept stopping their conversation to speak to me. It's hard to understand her accent, but I'm tempted to ask her about Tatu. ;D

Also, Tori, I had no clue that Oasis got back together. I've never really listened to much of their music. I heard "Wonderwall" on one of my step dad's CDs and decided I liked it. :B

The line, "Maybe you're going to be the one that saves me," was what I liked. Ha-ha. I am so lame.

What's different about their new song?

Mood: [Still very] amused
Listening to: Beck - "Lost Cause"
Drinking: Coffee

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Monday, September 29, 2008

9月 29日 「月曜日」
It's Addy's birthday today. :D

And I have Biology homework to /not/ do. - ~ - "

Mood: Amused
Listening to: Oasis - "Wonderwall"
Drinking: Coffee

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Friday, September 26, 2008

Better Company
9月 26日 「金曜日」
It is 4am, and I cannot sleep.

. . . .

I've been keeping busy, and I'm still not getting enough sleep. I went to bed at about this time the other night and my mom woke me up at seven, to ask if my step dad had headed out to pick her up yet, or not. I know I shouldn't be staying up so late, but she's pretty inconsiderate when it comes to other people sleeping.

Meh. Anyway, I applied at a sushi bar the other day. The guy who owns it is named Charlie, too, which is pretty amazing. They play music from the 80s all day, and the majority of the employees are cute girls. o ~ o" ..If I get hired, I probably won't get to take the job though, because my parents want to move. Such is life.

This was, yet again, another sloppy blog. I just wanted to say hi to you guys, though.
Did y'know, Cota's birthday is coming up? *o*

Ha-ha. Yay for being too broke to celebrate.
Anyway, I'm doing good; school is fine; and my schoolmates are pretty amazing. I'm also [surprisingly] passing my exams. I am going to lay down now. I have plans later and should probably be up before noon. Ha-ha. I hope you all are well.

Addy~ & the delicious campus floor

Oh yeah. And that /was/ the Cheshire Cat, Tori. Very noice. :B

Mood: Focused
Listening to: The Postal Service

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Thursday, September 18, 2008

Turning Tables Versus Flipping Them Over
9月 17日 「水曜日」
<<I am the bastard lovechild of
Tegan Quin and Ben Gibbard. xD

I gave myself some weird mixture of Tegan and Sara's haircuts last week. I haven't been feeling very creative. My hair was beginning to get so long. Justin was "for-shame"-ing me about looking too much like a girl.

Le, have I mentioned how much I love your comments? Your last one gave me such a good laugh.

Anyhow: I'll definitely work on being a happier gay. Ha-ha.

My text book also mentions the influence of a culture's individualism-collectivism spectrum: "Members of collectivistic cultures (such as Japan and India) prize harmony among members of their "in-group" and discourage expression of any negative emotions that might upset relationships among people who belong to it. By contrast, members of highly individualistic cultures like the United States and Canada feel comfortable revealing their feelings to people with whom they are close (Gallois, 1993; Matsumoto, 1991)."

And then with people on the outside of their "in-group," it's the opposite. Individualists find it more difficult to show negativity towards strangers, and feel a need to spare their feelings, while Collectivists have a lesser problem doing so.

There was also something else about how people living in warmer climates were more emotionally expressive, while people in colder regions seemed to hold back. That just seemed a little odd to me and not totally accurate. But what do I know, I've never left California.

Also, the game Portal is fantastic. I feel bad because I'm not articulate enough to explain what it was about the game that I liked so much. The game's description sounds so vague. "It's a shooter, but you're only given one gun, and you are only able to make portals with it . . ." y'know? Ha-ha.

And hearing, "It was very funny/delightful," is true, but doesn't necessarily sound like a good reason to play a game either. It's a fun game though, and I hope you do try it.

If you're not as impressed as I was with the game, however, The Orange Box comes with, like, five other games on the disc that I hear are pretty great themselves.

Terentia, I think I'm going to get two fish now. An orange Oranda Goldfish and a blue one. The orange one will be Noah and the blue will be Jonah. xD Jonah was the man who was swallowed by a fish, correct?

Man, this was such a sloppy blog. o ~ o"
I'm going to end it quick and get into bed. Ha-ha. I've been staying up really late this week and it's really killing me. I stayed up Sunday night (until six in the morning) studying, and then Justin called waking me up at ten in the morning, because he thought I might have wanted to go marker-shopping with him and Rudy -- Which was thoughtful, but being woken up after four hours of sleep . . . I was pretty angry. xD
I got over it though, fairly quickly.

Tori, get off the dial up. D: That's shaemful, like my dead sound card. Also, I hear you have a boyfriend. That's also shameful. (kidding) Who is it? >:I How can I be your and Cota's child and not know this stuff?

'Dgette, I don't /ever/ want to see Cota in a mini skirt. Ever. Ever, ever, ever, ever. o ~ o"
The asian's name is Hiro and he is the absolute best. I want his sword, but I'd probably cut off someone's arm with it.

Morgorat, you'd want to meet someone you really wanted to? My friend Justin is in love with Slipknot, and we saw one of the guys, Mick Thompson, inside the mall a few hours ago, and Justin was too afraid to say, "hi." I was like, "D:< You were five inches away from Mick. You could have grabbed his ass!"

Productivity +1

Ross's gift came in today. :D
He had me thinking they'd be atrocious looking shoes,
but it turned out to be a belt buckle.
What a sneaky kid.

[edit] The second part of his gift came in this morning. o-o" I have no clue what it is, but it is really cute . . .

Mood: Irritable
Listening to: Kaki King
Eating: Melatonin pills to sleep.

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Saturday, September 13, 2008

Natural Selection
9月 13日 「土曜日」
"At the most basic physiological level, people who know how to share their feelings are healthier than those who don't. On one hand, underexpression of feelings can lead to serious ailments. Inexpressive people -- those who value rationality and self-control, try to control their feelings and impulses, and deny distress--are more likely to get a host of ailments, including cancer, asthma, and heart disease (DeAngelis, 1992a; Mayne, 1999). . . ."

I guess I'll be looking forward to that heart disease.

This is supposed to be my weekend of study, because of the exam on Monday, but I hardly got any reading done. I stayed up all night watching volume two of Heroes (which was amazing by the way) and playing Portal.

So much for buckling down. Ha-ha.

I'm too bummed out about waiting for the next season of Heroes to start and too zombie-brained to recall any other events. I leave you with a snippet of my and Cota's MSN conversation from yesterday
(To explain ahead of time, I went to see the dentist Friday):
Andrew says:
Are you in pain?
Charles says:
I'm ok, was an ordinary teeth cleaning appointment.
Andrew says:
Thats good.
Andrew says:
Charles says:
She had me on my back as soon as she walked in the room and got her job done pretty quickly. She even brushed and flossed me afterwards.
Charles says:
But it hurt ;[
Charles says:
I have a good mind to ask her out on a date.
Andrew says:
Charles says:

I thought it was funny. D:

Also: Would it be all too horribly ironic to name a goldfish Noah? Because the only pet I'm currently (and still) allowed to have is a lovely pet fish and I want to name the next animal I own Noah.

I really like the name. I don't necessarily believe in 'the creator' or anything, but anything that holds any religious meaning to it, I find is very appealing. I think I just like the idea of religion. I can't really begin to explain why, either.


I saw this mug inside Barnes&Noble yesterday and I don't know why I couldn't come up with an answer for it. And as usual I over evaluated the damn thing to the point where it just became impossible for me to answer at all, therefore making the stupid thing worthy of having it's picture taken. Because it stumped Charlie with no effort at all. I mean, it was just sitting there. I feel bamboozled in some way.

What would /you/ attempt?

Cota☆I'm having second, third, and fourth thoughts. I think we should take the Millennium Earl and Rhode idea back into effect.
For Halloween that is.

Ashley★I've been buying the manga, but I just recently got a copy of the anime. The boys all look like girls. xD

Hmm. I appreciate that idea, but I don't wish to be better than Collin. If she said she were better than me I'd whole-heartedly agree. n ~ n"

And I use Prisma Color Markers. I'm looking forward to giving Copic Markers a shot -- And if I ever get unlame and update my computer (and get a Wacom tablet), I'm definitely up for trying photoshop.

Jenny☆I don't think it's your mind wishing to relive those past events. Sounds more like a fear of being left behind. :( Subconsciousness is scary.

There's apparently going to be another season of Scrubs, so I've been told, but Carla and JD won't be a part of it. What is Scrubs without two of the main characters? It sounds pretty ridiculous. And I love the soundtracks to every season of that show -- all the music was suggested by Zach Braff. I can't imagine what the soundtrack would be like without him.

Tori★I've seen variations of her boots, but none as fantastic. You must show me these magic works of art.

And about the "disease," it was all him. D: < I hope you feel better though. Aha~ and that isn't a girl. It's a boy I'm naming Robin for no real reason. Now I'm thinking he does look like Ellen Page though.

Le☆I think I'm getting the dreams and past events confused because I'm dreaming about having conversations with people that I'd probably have sitting in my own living room. -shrug-

Mm. And being original . . . haha. I don't know if originality really has a meaning anymore. Everything is conforming in one way or another. And people who talk about being "real" usually seem, to me, just like a handful of other persons around them.

I suppose the only way around it is not to care one way or another.

And I am terrible. Ha-ha. I didn't even provide eye candy this time. I don't even know what I'm thinking about when I color. D: Doesn't that sound lame? I just choose which direction I want the 'light source' to be coming in from and shade accordingly. Everyone does that, I'm sure. And I sort of envision it in my head, which I'm also going to assume everyone does.

I pay a lot of attention to the shadows and lighting on everything I see. It's a sickness.

Mood: Oddly comfortable
Listening to: [Szayel's on shuffle] Taken By Trees
Eating: Yoplait Yogurt -- biggest meal all week = ~ ="

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