Friday, June 9, 2006
I'm tired of being me, I'm tired of being sad, I'm just tired of everything. My friend and I started to talk about our lives and what we did and thinking about what I did just made me want to say I'm sorry to myself because what I did back then just ruined my life now. I was stupid and I still am because I keep choosing stuff that keeps blowing up in my face. I chose to hurt guys and make then get buises larger than my head, I chose to be who I am now and I still complain about my life. To me I sound like a spoiled brat.
So in the conversation I was having with my friend I start telling her stuff like when I was in elementary school that I would become this great person that didn't have a trace of her elementary past in her. I was wrong, I tried to be nice, I tried to not get angry, I tried long and hard, but no one would let me. I think it was more I wouldn't let myself but then that wouldn't make sense, or would it? I don't know who I'm going to be or what, I don't even know what I want from life anymore.