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myOtaku.com: Angel Zakuro

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

this is just some rambling, well, a lot of rambling.
Hey guys!!! *huggles* Thank you for the comments last time. ^^ I know, it's been over a week since I posted here. But I warned you before...I won't be posting as often here on myO. I always log onto theO first, so then sometimes I don't even log on here...and fewer and fewer people are visiting here. :( Heck, who am I to talk about that? LOl. I only got one comment on my last World post anyway. XD I'm just not likeable anymore. Haha. Anyhoo, thanks so much Jes, Kojiro, Raisha, and Stephie! I appreciate it. ^^ Yes, my grandma is doing better thankfully. And my dad had a fine trip. Didn't catch much though. XD

Should I start copying and pasting all the posts I do on my World, no matter how long or short, on here as well? I just feel bad that I only post once a week or less here, and then news is all old when I rehash it here...for those that don't comment on theO at all. :/ So help me decide!!! *hugs*

What happened since my last post that I've talked about on theO: I spoke with my dad about the credits thing. It was pretty bad...I did cry, though not as much as I thought I would. He was incredibly upset. Really really mad. At me, at the school, at everything. That was on...friday or something...or saturday; I don't remember. Whenever it was, well, he hasn't talked to me about the school stuff since then. So there's been no solution brought up to help me with next year. I THINK though...that he's letting me go an extra semester or year or whatever I need...I think. >>' Like I said, he didn't tell me directly. Mommy said that would be fine, but she doesn't have the final say. Dad does. Lots of people have been asking me or telling me to just talk to my mom about this whole thing, but like I said...it really doesn't matter WHAT SHE thinks since my dad is the money-maker (or money-lender?) lol. So I'm stuck with dealing with the tyrant.

Other stuff has probably happened, but I don't feel like going over it again. XD So now for the new part of the post!

Why on earth am I posting anyway? I'm not sure. I just felt like putting something here. Well, I made a new wallpaper! It isn't the one that I've been slaving over for a couple weeks...this was just a quick one. :) I really like it though. Hopefully more people do! Lol, barely anyone's commented or hugged or anything. >>' Oh well. I LIKE IT.

As for my WIP, I'm at a crossroad with it...about the bg. I really don't like it. Lol, even though I'm just mimicking the original scan's, it just doesn't look right. :/ So I have two versions I'm deciding on which to work with: this one that has the green side that's like the original's, and then this one that has blue all over. >.< I don't know. I realize they're messy, but I kind of want it that way!! It's all impressionistic painty...thing...yeah. If you don't remember, this is the original scan. I really like how I painted the girl, but everything else is just BLEH.

I've been plagued with more headaches and neck aches lately. Well, everyday. I haven't had a pain-free day in a really long time. *sigh* I hate it. Even with the meds that I take, nothing really works!! So I'm just like WTF. Whatever. I just have to live with it. I've been pretty down today. School was ok, even though I got a 70 on my marketing quiz today...we haven't gotten back ANY of the other quizzes, so I'm pretty scared. If I got a 70 on this one, I can't imagine my grades on the others. But that's not why I'm feeling down! It's my physical pain, it's the graduating credits problem, and it's just my general feeling of...wanting to just go anti-social. I know, I'm writing this so I must not be! Right? Yeah, well. I've just been feeling...left out...unloved...like I'm not good enough. I feel like every time I say something, it makes someone mad or they misunderstand it. That's why I just want to be antisocial, become a hermit and not talk to anyone!!! Even though I want to be more included and feel loved, at the same time, I don't want to bother being around people...where conflicts can happen. And yes, most of these things are stemming from here on theO and other friends I have online, not IRL. I just don't bother with IRL friends at school. I just don't. It makes things easier.

I've been kind of annoyed by some artists here. I can't stand seeing the same people and their same stuff being on the front page. Being so popular. There are LOTS Of other talented artists here, you know?? But it's like they just get ignored for the name-brand, or whatever you want to say. I know that Nami and Mariel have had similar complaints. So yeah, I feel the same. :/ And not just fanart, I'm talking about the other categories, too. It's ok to have your own style, most definitely! I mean, that's what makes an artist, right?? But sometimes I wish certain people would do something DIFFERENT. *sigh* If I'm guilty of the stuff I'm ranting about, I apologize. Just let me know.

I've been playing FF13. I think it's good so far! Not GREAT yet, but it's just the beginning. I have the some complaints that a lot of people had, about there being so many movies and not enough playtime. But I'm only on the second chapter. :) I need to get the new Ace Attorney game! EDGEWORTHHHHH. <333 And I still haven't gotten the new Pokemon either. Hopefully this weekend, which IS Easter break! I have tomorrow off, and friday as I usually do, plus monday. :3 Hooray. I need another break. School is getting tiring.

Wow, I think I'm writing too much. I'm just putting down whatever the heck comes to mind...no matter how unimportant. ^^; Like the fact that I have spider bites on my forehead! Yeah, WTF. How did that happen??? Itchy. *thinks* I know other things are bothering me, but I can't put my finger on them lol. I'm just a miserable, useless blob today. Sorry. XD

I wrote way too much. Thanks to whoever reads this brainspill!! *hugs* If no one comments, that's fine, too. I was just...writing for myself I guess. Take care~

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