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Sunday, September 5, 2010

tomorrow & rants

Hey it's been a while since my last post here! Sorry! *hugs* Thank you, corn, for your comment on here. :) And theO...and everything. XD If you only read posts on myO, then you've missed out on my other posts about school starting...and how things have gone, which haven't been that great! Mostly cause of my health issues, which will be ranted upon in this post, too. XD Thanks again~

Some of you saw already, but this post on my other world is just for the links to my new art. That isn't really a "real" post...just has my new ecard and fanart (flowers) on there. So if you're lazy, you can click that and click on my art that way lol! I only did that cause people might've gotten confused with the updates...I had some error problems when trying to submit them.

So how are all of you? Good? I hope so. Those of you in the States should be happy to have tomorrow off for Labor Day! ♥ It's also my mom's birthday. ^_^ It's great. If I didn't have off, I would've had one of my retarded school days...and it just wouldn't be any fun! There's also a doubleheader (Phillies)...so that means a game during the day and at night. XD I'll be busy watching baseball lol. They better win!! Cause that should be my mom's gift. I didn't...really get her anything. I just drew her those flowers. I mean, she has something for me to give her, but it isn't the same. ^^;; Then again, my brother forgot, too...I don't know about D, but Corey said he didn't get anything yet lol. We're so bad!! I guess it's just that it sorta snuck up on us. And it being a holiday anyway...eh. But mommy is so great. She really doesn't mind. At least not me. She knows I show her love in many ways. :) Unlike my brothers, I'm KIND AND HELPFUL AND I DO WHAT SHE SAYS.

*sigh* Had another migraine today. That's...well, several days in a row now. I wish my prescription gave me more pills. It's like a billion dollars for only 9. I guess most people only get a few a month...not me! I got them almost everyday. I need to go back to my neurologist. This isn't funny. It isn't right. I shouldn't be having so much pain everyday at my age. It's my neck, my head...although it might be tied to the MCSS. It says one of the side-effects is migraine! I never had neck aches like this before. Only when my stupid MCS became worse that I have...so it probably has to do with one another. It really frustrates me. I've been getting depressed about it. Cried about it. I always talk to my mom about it...cause she's in the same boat...but there's no solution. [NAMI SEND ME YOUR RESEARCH ALREADY.] Because of these things, I've been worrying more and more about stuff in the future that I shouldn't be. "What if my teacher doesn't switch rooms like I asked him to?" [cause the one we're in has new carpeting...I reacted SO badly to it...these classrooms have been bothering me a lot.] "What will I do when I try and find a job?" [cause most likely I'll be allergic to something in the place...] Etc. etc.

I can't worry day to day, I worry in clumps. I worry in clumps in the far-ish future...so like things months from now I'm panicking about. ~___~ It's ridiculous. And a lot of it, again, has to do with my health issues at the moment. I know I'm so incredibly grateful that I don't have cancer in the family or anything like that...but mom and I have this mysterious thing that no one recognizes or knows anything about. It's not deadly certainly, but it makes me want to die sometimes. That and my migraines. I want to stab my neck with a knife. [I won't really...just sometimes I get these bad thoughts.] :(

Hmm...the weather has been really nice this weekend. Incredible really. Cool, sunny. Not HOT or HUMID. Just...really pleasant. <3 If only it could be like this forever!

So my dad ordered more fish. Discus, you know. I hope we can get another angelfish so I can name him Todd II. :( RIP Todd. Anyhoo, they were supposed to arrive last friday...but they weren't sent cause of the weather. Soooo they should come wednesday. I told my dad to stop getting more! Especially since it's stressful on them to be shipped on a plane, but ehhhh, he can't resist. So I hope they arrive healthy. Then I get to come up with more names for them lol. We have so many...I don't know how he thinks they'll fit.

I waste too much time on facebook...it's the games. Dx I never thought I would! ;___;

Ok. I can't think of anything else to say. I did a good amount of ranting!! XD I hate school. Ugh, I had enough! All I had was one week, but bleh. I think it's senioritis...so close...but so far. graduation. Oh, before I say good-bye...anyone ever watch Project A-Ko (other than Jerry)? It's a classic 80's anime...well, this music video always confused me. If anyone can explain why the girls are dancing around on a farm, please do. It's the most hilarious thing ever...GET A CHANCE, LADY! And...SWEEP UP COW POO!

Ok! So now that's it. *hugs* I love you guys. Thank you thank you again. Take care. And good luck to all of you with school and work.

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Saturday, August 28, 2010

zoooooooo and stupid school.

Hey people. :) *hugs* Thanks for your comments, corn and lute! <3333 My myO faithful friends. Haha, yes, whoever invented high heels was a sadist...nope, it was man...they obviously didn't care cause they didn't have to wear them!! Lute, thanks for all your encouragement about the school year and stuff. Unfortunately this post has more ranting about school starting. XD Oh, I forgot to write in it...but the Phillies won the last two games, so that's good at least haha.

This post will be a combo of fun things and depressing things~ Well, maybe not depressing necessarily for anyone but me lol...

Sooo...made a new card. I like it now, I think. I spent so much time on it that I totally hated it for a while...but now I like it. XD I couldn't make decisions on the typography, but I guess it ended up ok! It's for a challenge.

Hmm...what should I talk about first? How about today? Sure! Ok. XD I'll answer for you lol. So today we went to the zoo! :) Well, not THE zoo, but A zoo. A local one that's much smaller compared to the Philly zoo, but it was still fun! :] We were probably the only family there that didn't have a child in a stroller...so I guess yeah, it's a smaller place, more geared towards little kids! ^^; But hey, I'm still a little kid at heart. I had a lot of fun. I love animals. <3 My face lit up quite a lot during the trip. XD I don't agree with how some of the animals are caged and treated...but this zoo seemed really nice. It was super clean! Ahah, so anyhoo. What's funny is that there were buzzards everywhere...there was only one vulture that was actually a part of an exhibit! All the rest were just flying in and out of the enclosures lol.

There was a wolf...so pretty. Unfortunately my camera acted freaking retarded when I was trying to take a pic of him. :( It froze up when I was taking a video! Ugh! And the wolf was so close, too. So I didn't get any good pics of him. But I did lots of others~ Buffalo, the roaming peacock, prairie dogs that eat lasagna, owls, butterflies, wild cats, birds, etc. You can see some of the pics I took here on FB. :) That's not all the photos I took, but they were the best ones. I submitted two of my faves on dA:
♥The Gorgeous Butterfly
♥Ducky~~ Haha, I loved the ducks the most. XD I fed them some of my granola bar...and they kept diving for the pieces and making the cutest noises!! They weren't like QUACK QUACK. They were...little...funny squeaky sounds. XD

Before getting to the zoo I was feeling really sick in the car. ;__; I blame it on my migraine. We had to hurry to get me out of the car...luckily nothing came of it, but gawd I felt like throwing up! :[ Stupid migraines. I felt better as we walked around though. Well, it was a sunny day...even though I had my visor on and sunscreen...I still got sunburned. ~__~ GAWD I HATE MY STUPID SENSITIVE SKIN. So my face, nose, and back of my neck/shoulders. *shakes fist at the sun*

Ok...now onto the next piece of business. *sigh* School. It is upon me, gosh darnit. :( Tomorrow I have to go to check in. That's a pretty easy thing...we just pick up our schedules, errr, calendars and things. Parking passes. Stuff like that. But I still hate it. Because it's always the sunday before we go back! And it heightens my anxiety. DX Stupid school. So yeah, I start monday...I'm pissed about it. I wish I had one more week, just one. I'm scared. This is my senior year of college, yet I'm still full of anxiety. I hate the first days because they're usually just pointless ones where we go over the syllabuses, but sometimes a teacher will already start notes or force work upon you. I hate reading the syllabus...it really scares me, gives me anxiety. Without fail, every new semester, I have a panic attack after seeing the course descriptions and work that will be done throughout the year. Seeing all the dates and all the assignments at once...it builds up. I get overwhelmed easily and get really emotional. :(

I checked online for my online class and she and my teacher for my fashion class already have stuff up...the f-ing syllabuses...and assignments already!! ;__; For fashion, she already wants us to have the books bought and chapter 1 read BY THE FIRST CLASS ON MONDAY. WTF. NO. Sorry lady, we're not psychic. We didn't know to get the books that far ahead. SO F YOU AND GO DIE. She better be nice. Nicer than the biatch I had all these other years. She was fired, you know? My previous mentor that I would always complain about? Yeah, she's gone. So now we have some new lady as our fashion teacher...she better be good...though I already don't like her for telling us to do this already. ^^;;;

Sorry~ I wrote too much as usual. Lol. I'm just...ugh...I don't want to go back to school. I prefer relaxing and lazing around! I may get straight A's, but who cares! AGH. At least I had fun at the zoo. I could rant about my brother, but I'll give you guys a rest lol. Thanks for visiting me. XD *hugs* Take care!

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Wednesday, August 25, 2010


Hey guys~ How are all of you? Thanks a bunch for all the comments on my stuff lately. :) You guys are all great! <33 Faroe, corn, and Lute! Arigatou! <33

In case you haven't seen my last card, here it is. I really like it a lot. XD It's simple, but just...ehhh, it hits me the right way! Aside from the BL goodness lol. I'm just happy with it.

Ugh...so my summer vacation is quickly disappearing. ;__; I go back this coming monday...and sunday is when I have to check-in. I'm thankful that I still commute. XD I would hate to move in and live on campus! Lol I know that a lot of people LOVE it, but that sure isn't my thing. I'm also surprised that so many of my classmates are excited to go back. Really? Is IU that exciting?? And this IS coming from people that live on campus. I guess...it's fun for them...they're more social than me, that's for sure. But hey, I prefer to just stay at home and do nothing! XD So that's why I want summer to last as long as possible. .__. But all I hear from my friends on FB are "OMG YAY!! SCHOOL STARTS SOON!! MOVING IN THIS WEEKEND, WOOT!" I'm like WTF. O___O Are you CRAZY??? Sorry. Even though I'm a good student, I don't like school. I've never been eager to go back...though I'm very happy that this is my senior year. My last year of school FOREVERRRRR. I think the toughest part won't be the classes, it will be the internship. I need to find one by October (I think)...and that isn't easy. :( Especially since I really don't like my fashion major all that much! *sigh*

Most of my classes this semester are late evening ones. So 4-7pm. *rolls eyes* I've never had classes at that time before. It'll be weird, and I don't think I'll like it. Tuesdays, thursdays, and fridays will be the best. On Tues and Thurs, I only have one class each, and none on fridays lol! But I'll have that online class that I KNOW has a 40 page paper to do. I think that's my biggest worry, though I don't know what my other classes (all freaking business) will have in store.

So yesterday I ran into some trouble. The other night I accidentally dropped my phone...and I heard it hit something, and it was my brother's camera. Now I didn't see anything wrong with my phone, so I assumed all was well! But I didn't examine the camera. So yesterday I looked at it...and it was broken. :( SOMEHOW. OUT OF THE WHOLE ROOM MY PHONE DECIDED TO FALL AT AN ANGLE RIGHT ON THE LCD SCREEN. So it broke it! Ugh!!! I was so upset. Of course I had to tell Corey. ~__~ It wasn't easy. I did end up crying, cause I'm a wuss. He wasn't exactly mad...but he did make me pay for it. I think I'm more upset that he didn't say anything like, "Aw, it's ok. Just pay and it'll be fine." No comfort when I'm crying, but heck, when is he ever comforting? Bah. So whatever. I gave him his money and all was ok again. But still. I felt so bad!!!

The other bad thing yesterday was that I got an email from someone at my school saying that my fall schedule has been dropped. Huh? Wtf? It said that we didn't pay for the semester yet, so they dropped my courses, meaning I wouldn't be able to go this semester. D< I was so arggghhh!!! I quickly went upstairs and told my parents. They were also like wtf, but we paid it online. So we paid and things should be ok now...but still...it was quite the scare!! The thing is that my mom talked to some lady there and asked when they would send an invoice. They said they would last week, and they never did!! So it was THEIR faults. -__-

Today mom and I went to the mall. We were pretty...um...static (?)...solitary? I can't think of the word I want, but we didn't really go to many places lol. XD We stayed in Nordstrom the whole time. Not usually my place, but I'm afraid that I'm guilty of enjoying...fashion a bit more!! ^^; I used to HATE shopping for clothes, shoes, etc. But lately I've enjoyed it more. Lol. I tried on a ton of shoes, mostly just for fun. High heels. I never wear those; they're so uncomfortable! But my feet are the right size for all the display shoes so I just went around trying everything on for kicks lol. I don't know how people walk in those heels. I didn't get any, of course!! XD After that, mom had to bring back a purse or something...so I actually looked around. >>' In the discounted area. Now, this is one thing I always vowed not to enjoy: purses/handbags. I've refused to buy any or enjoy them lol!!! So what do I do today? ....buy 2. D: They are so cute and little! Not any of those big clunky things. They're small and just right for a phone, wallet, and other little things. Not much. :] Michale Kors. I couldn't believe it though...I feel bad! I went against my anti-purse vows!!!!!!! O___O

Uh, other than that I got a cute dress. It's black with white tiny polka dots. :) Then we went home...a nice trip out, though I wish we stayed out more and went to Borders, gamestop, and the Sanrio store. XD *spoiled*

Hmm...oh...Phillies. They've been on the lower-end of the joy spectrum lately. ^^; They've lost 3 in a row, and each game has been incredibly frustrating. If more of you guys knew baseball, then I could go on quite the rant from last night's game! Lol. It was insane. If anyone cares and wants to hear about it, if you don't already know, then just pm me or something. XD It was a 16-inning travesty.

Ok. I wrote too much, as usual. *hugs* Sorry!!!! But thank you all for dealing with me. :) I love you guys~~~ Take care!

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Sunday, August 22, 2010

fail post. (not)

Hey~ Thanks for the comments, Faroe and noir! <333 You guys are awesome. :) Sorry I don't post often enough on myO. Hmm...I should also change my theme some time, but I actually really like this green one. XD

I've been on the computer too much today. My eyes are like WTF JUST GET OFF ALREADY. GO DO SOMETHING ELSE. But here I am, posting. But as the title suggests, it will be a fail post. Too short to be considered a "post" by my standards lol...but ehhhh...I just felt like updating for the sake of updating! :) [I'm sure it will still be long compared to others' posts though!]

Here's my new wall. ^^ I think it turned out cute. Much nicer than the original scan. I'm a little bummed at the few amount of faves (right now), but that's a ridiculous thing to be bummed about. I guess sometimes I just get like confused and wtf...why do some wallpapers or ecards, that look shoddy, get so popular? I mean, things really have gotten better around here, I must say. The quality has gone up, especially in the ecard department. :) Remember when all the most popular cards were by that same person (villageidiot), and all they were were crappy screenshots and one-liners? XD Well, there's still some of those floating around, but I'm so happy to finally see ecards being taken seriously. Before they used to be shoved to the side and ignored. TheO only paid attention to the fanart and wallpapers (sometimes), but now ecards are becoming just as popular and high-quality! Cause they're little masterpieces. ^_^ I like to say I started that trend...lol. *cough*modest*cough* But I have a feeling that isn't the case. XD

I'm really liking my new phone now. I've gotten used to it, though I still don't like the QWERTY keyboard. The buttons are just soooo tiny. But eh, I'll probably get used to it over time. For your phones...does it have the keyboard? And if so, do you like using it? Does it get easier to use the more you use it? Oh, and I'm proud to say my idiot brother didn't exchange his phone to get one like mine (Samsung Reality). XD He stuck with the one we got him. But my mom...well, she improved hers to an LG Chocolate Touch!! D: It's really cool. But ehhhh, I like mine more. XD

I had another migraine today. I had about 2 days without any, but now they're back again, and I'm out of my meds. :( Argh. And I can't get it refilled for a while...soooo stupid.

I did something stupid yet hilarious on facebook tonight. So I have added theFightins.com, which is a Phillies blog...and the guys on there are always funny. Always poking fun and making crude jokes. Anyhoo, I commented on one of the posts, but FB kept coming up with this error...so...I kept hitting submit...and. XD Well, it posted my comment 6 times!! Lol. Ahhh! And I noticed that the guy that runs the site "liked" each 6 of them and then posted my same comment again. XD I felt so stupid! But it was funny. So now I added the guy as a friend. I hate doing stupid things like that. I deleted my extra comments. >>' But now I feel like I should've kept them so they could joke around more. Ah well. I'm a stupid perfectionist that is soooo self-conscious about everything.

If curious, this is a picture of my fridge. It is covered in Phillies pic I cut out of the newspaper...

Only one week left of summer. :( I'm really sad about that. This was such a crappy summer. I only did things with friends ONCE (maybe twice)...and other than that, nothing happened. Went to one phils game, shopped at the mall some. But ugh. I have no life, and this summer showed it. I'm a bit depressed now, thinking about going back.

As usual, I made this longer than I intended. ^^; Sorry. *hugs* Thanks for visiting me! I love you guys! Take care.

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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

short but happy post.

Thanks for the comments always, you guys! <33 You're the best. :) I think...my last post was really depressing...was it? I honestly don't remember. Don't worry though! Today I'm in such a good mood. :] But I want to get ready for bed soon, so I'd best make this fast-ish....

Why am I in a good mood? Well, aside from the Phillies winning (lol) I'M FINISHED WITH MY SUMMER CLASSES!!!! Yes! Finally! Boy those 6 weeks sure felt like forever! D: Ugh. 6 weeks out of my summer...wasted on that crap...but I guess it was worth it. Now I'll for sure graduate on time, and I won't have to take those classes during the fall or spring! Making those semesters a little lighter. :) And as I said a long time ago, when these first started, I'm glad I took Lifespan development online during the summer cause I remembered hearing how hard the class was during the regular semester...NOT online. Like there would be a really long final oral presentation or something. Hah! I didn't have to do that! XD And speaking of that lifespan class, I found out I got an A in it~~~ Hooray! <3 Another reason to be happy. ^_^

The other good reason...my dear twin Meg (innocent heart) hath returned! :) Oh it was great hearing from her again~

Some crappy things happened today though. Lots of drama involving certain friends on here. Lots of drama. I hate drama....that's why I try to avoid it. XD But I can't always avoid it. So I've been trying to help a member of the fiasco with advice and whatnot. Gotta take care of your friends. I hope things get settled...sorted...and everything will be honky-dory again. ^^; So stressful! But as I learned in my philosophy class...in stuff written by Cicero on friendship: "Why should we banish friendship from our lives, for fear of being involved by it in some amount of distress? If you take away emotion, what difference remains I don't say between a man and a beast, but between a man and a stone..." In other words, we can't avoid friendships out of fear of being stressed out or getting into messes like these. Our emotions are what makes us humans, and it's up to us to deal with them.

Anyhoo, some pics I want to share with you...I'm too lazy so I'll just direct you to them on FB.
♥Gorgeous Sunset Clouds I took yesterday (I have higher resolutions on my deviantart)
♥This pic of me I really like!

Ok~ I'd best end this here. Thanks for visiting me. :) Now that I'm free for a couple weeks, I'll try my best to comment when I can and also work on that blasted wallpaper! XD Take care!

P.S. I went to the chiropractor yesterday, got adjusted (MUCH NEEDED), and today I didn't have a migraine. :] I hope it stays this way for a while lol.

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Saturday, August 14, 2010

complaints and movie review.

Hey guys! *hugs* OMG I'm sorry it's been so long since I posted anything here on myO~~ It's just I haven't been posting very long ones on theO, or I've done them really late...and haven't had time to paste them here. ^^; Thanks to everyone that commented last time!! :)

Crap. I just pressed some weird key...and it sent my page to my home page...and then stuff was erased. *sigh* Oh well. XD I didn't have much at the time anyway lol.

Anyhoo, here's my new card. I think it's been like 2 weeks since my last one. This one isn't my usual uplifting/happy/pretty/sweet. It's dark and depressing cause that's how I've been feeling. :(

If the reasons for me feeling this way aren't already obvious:
â—˜summer school work. I'm almost done, thank goodness, but I have a billion things to do by tuesday night, and I don't know how I'll do it...
â—˜I feel like my summer has been wasted, and it's almost time to go back to school right after I finish with summer school.

Ahem. Yes. The third bullet is really getting to me because it's make the other bullets seem worse. I've had a migraine now everyday for almost 2 weeks (maybe more). My head is killing me, my neck is killing me, I'm killing me. Remember this happened before? My ultra frequent migraines? Yeah, I had a nice time of not having them this often, but now I'm back to it...and I hate it. It makes me feel helpless, especially when my migraine meds aren't doing the trick. I've even taken 2 pills, which I usually never do, and even that doesn't work. So that means I must need a DIFFERENT KIND, but my God, I've tried every migraine medicine out there! I have. :( And the others had such bad side-effects, it made me rather have a migraine. So I really don't know what to do...I don't know why it's like this, but it is, and it's really getting me down. I'm struggling with having to do my homework because I've been in such debilitating pain every single day. It's not that easy to read a billion things and type 10 pages-worth of papers etc. when you feel like crap.

I'll be very glad when all of these classes are over with. Lifespan was done yesterday, and so now it's just all this philosophy sh** to be done by tuesday night. I found out that the first day of fall semester starts august 30 instead of 24, so at least that's one positive.

Phillies lost yesterday horribly but won today amazingly. <3 My brother says I'm baseball obsessed. I only care about the Phillies. Well, true. Sure. That's what summer's about for me! Watching baseball...and then when fall/winter comes along, then i'm all about hockey. XD I can't help it! I live and die with the team. You never want to be around me when my boys lose.

So the other day we went to see Inception. Those of you that have me added on facebook know that...lol...and know how I didn't like it! ^^; Yes, I KNOW a lot of people LOVED it and thought it was so AMAZING, but I didn't care for it. Sorry. ;P I was extremely bored by it for I'd say 70% of the time. Confused 50% of the time. Interested 30% of the time...I swear. (yes, that's over 100%) We wanted to leave the movie early, lol, but my dad wanted to watch it! The funny thing was though that HE FELL ASLEEP DURING IT. My dad tends to fall asleep during movies a lot, but it was ridiculous that he fell asleep during the one movie he requested to see and then afterwards said it was "so great." Hahaha. We laughed cause we knew he was snoozing...he kept denying it...but it's obvious when he's "looking down" the whole time and mom asks, "What's down there that's so interesting?" XD And he's like, "huh...?" Lol. Oh but yeah. I know lots of people thought it was great, but it wasn't my thing. I don't recommend it, but eh, everyone's tastes are different!

Tomorrow I MIGHT go to the pool with my friends Karen etc. Basically the only group of friends I ever do anything with. It's at her and her family's apartment place...they have a pool. I haven't been in one in forever. I really want to go...but I'm being kept back by the possibilities of another migraine, and all of the hw that I still have to work on. *sigh* So I'll just have to see. :/

Ok! I wrote enough. It's late. I'm tired. I feel crappyyyyyyy. DX *hugs* But thank you for sticking with me! Sorry again for not as many comments...until I finish this class, I can't do much. :( Take care!

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Wednesday, August 4, 2010

interesting times.

Wow, so many comments~ Lol. *hugs* Thanks guys! I hear from more people here on myO now than theO! XD Truly amazing. So thanks Faroe, Jungy, Chibi, Dark, and SS!! <3

Hmm...I've been meaning to post, but then it'd get too late. Let's see if I can make this fast! I should probably make time to post earlier...but I don't. I just don't. I have NO TIME. Most of my computer time these days is taken up by homework. :/ It's really a bummer. ;__; Which is why I doubt I'll ever finish my Kobato wall...but here's the quick wall I made!! ^^ From Binchou-tan, one of the cutest anime ever. It's just so sweet and relaxing...so innocent and cute. <3 I'm sorry to those of you that got fooled and thought by the title that this wall was going to be my kobato one. XD

Alright. I'm going to go back a few days to when something actually happened! XD Monday night was it? I think...I don't remember, haha. My dad's been talking about how he used to be able to hit (softball)...and how he could still hit a homerun etc. He said, "We gotta go to the batting cages, and I'll show you!" So finally we went...to this little old place called Grand Slam. It's this, uh...well, used to be the happenin' place to be when I was little, full of arcade games, the batting cages, laser tag, and all sorts of those other games you'd play to win tickets. Well, it's definitely gone downhill. ^^; I haven't been in a while...and it's just horrible lol!!! They have NO air conditioning so it's a billion degrees in there, half of the machines are out of order, and the ones that "worked" didn't really work...they wouldn't give tickets. Or they just wouldn't take the tokens! Example: I wanted to play DDR. It cost 3 tokens. I put in 3. It registered 2. I put in another (4)...it only registered 2. Ok then!! I'd call that OUT OF ORDER.

Ahem. So I didn't get to play DDR. We went to the batting cages...and dad did pretty well! Not too shabby for not doing it for so long. I tried for the first time ever...and it was horrible. I tried it with "softball," and my gawd, I should've done baseball. At least those balls are smaller and maybe lighter!! XD With aluminum bats, you can feel EVERYTHING. And me being a weak little girl, lol, it was just ugh. It hurt so much when I'd make contact! ^^; I'd feel the impact all the way up my arms and hands. I didn't ever hit the ball far, and I quit partway through cause I hurt my hand too much. I apparently also fouled a couple off my leg...cause I only noticed today some bruises. XD Corey tried as well, and he did OK...but not great. Dur hur. They said I looked like a 12 year old boy in the helmet. THANK YOU.

After doing that, we went to "play" some of the other games. Like I said, most didn't even give tickets. So my brother got this girl that worked there to come over and help. LO AND BEHOLD THAT GIRL WAS MY FRIEND MADII. XD I had no clue she worked there!!! Dur! It was hilarious. So we talked some. I haven't seen her in quite a while. She went to my college but left last year cause she didn't like it. It was nice to see her...and even nicer cause she let me have whatever prize I wanted lol. I gave her the tickets we got, and she said, "Lemme count those...later...eh. Just take whatever you want." Haha! So I took a cute teddy bear. :3 Which would've cost the most 1000 tickets. Yup yup. I definitely had 1000 tickets...>>' RIGHT MADII?? She said so. Teehee!

So that was a fun little outing. Not fun in that it was really GOOD, but fun cause it was kinda bad. XD And cause my friend let me have whatever I wanted. :D

Yesterday my brother decided to be a horrible jerk and make a big argument out of something terribly small. It was so stupid. Soooo stupid. He called me names and said I was such a bad person. I'm a "fool." I'm a "bad person." I "wouldn't make it in the real world." I'd "get yelled at all the time." I "should be punished more." Ok. Yeah. Right. He made me cry, and of course he doesn't apologize. *sigh* I really wish he'd move out already...he's almost 30...he doesn't act like it. He still acts like a selfish 7 year old or something. He doesn't ever think about what he says or realize that he's acting how he does. For heaven's sake the "argument" was over what we were having for dinner. He's an idiot and always will be. He's the one that can't live in the "real world"...if he could, he'd be moved out by now.

Hmm....more homework...too much...I don't know how I'll get it all done...

Phillies have been winning at least! :) So that makes me happy. The other things bring me down, but you know I love it when my boys win. XD

*hugs* Ok. I took a lot longer and wrote more than I thought I would. :/ Thanks for visiting me!! Take care!

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Saturday, July 31, 2010

I needs more self-esteem.

Hey, thanks Roleni, wallie, corn, Raisha, and faroe for all the comments! ^_^ You're all awesome. *hugs* More comments here on myO than on theO! Wow, that's weird. XD

*copies and pastes from theO*
But really. Where is everyone? :O I know I did a little rant before about how little people are commenting these days on art...but what about posts? What's the point of all my subs if I get 3 comments or less? Lol. There are so many good friends I haven't heard from in a long time. Not just through comments, but through any other means of communication on here! :/ I mean...it's the summer...unless everyone's on trips. Sure, people don't have to comment all the time, and I know my posts are annoyingly long...but really? I just feel unloved! ^^; I remember the old days on myO when it was a hoppin' happenin' place. I mean, posts would get 10+ comments. I remember there was a time when people were so active that it was almost a contest to see who could get the most comments lol. I remember my most was almost 30! 20-something. And all different people. Yeah, wow. Now...I only hope to get maybe 3-4 different people commenting. XD It's kinda sad. Not say that's the only reason I post or whatever...but it's awfully nice to get recognition in some way...[for those of you on myO, this is mostly a complaint about theO, the new site]

But thank you guys that have been commenting. *hugs* You're all awesome. And to the friends I hardly here from: I just miss you, that's all. I'm not mad...just a little lonely! XD

Here's my new card. I really like it a lot. <3 Yes, I could've worked on my wallpaper, but I didn't want to. Cards are just more fulfilling to me now. Less canvas to work with, less time to make them, yet I feel like I can be more creative with them.

I'm happy to say that more people have entered my Belimai challenge. ^^ I'm loving the entries! Don't forget the challenge ends in a little under a week...so if you want to submit a drawing to it...yeah, gotta get on it. XD

Ok, now that I have those things out of the way. If you saw my other post, I said I've been pretty depressed! Yes indeed. I haven't felt very chipper lately, but yesterday I was just uber down. Down about everything in my life. Today I've been bleh as well, but this time my mind's decided to attack my physical appearance lol. So you know MCSS (the weird allergy thing I have)? Yeah, well I woke up with my face really red ands spotty...looked like I had major acne. ~__~ And I don't know why! I'm really sick and tired of having a red burny face all the time for reasons I don't know. Like what could I react to? D< I looked horrible. And felt horrible. :( And today we were just going out to do a couple things, and I was putting on my pants...only to find they don't fit anymore. Not just one pair but 2. And the second pair I've barely had a year, and they fit fine before; I hardly wore them. The first I've worn a lot, but still. The other week I found out my shorts don't fit. *sigh* So that makes me thinking "OH GREAT I'M GETTING FAT. MY STUPID BIG, FAT BUTT IS GETTING BIGGER." It really pissed me off.

Now, I know I'm not "overweight," and I definitely don't look fat...not from the waist up, but for some reason, my lower half refuses to cooperate. And now I weigh more than I ever have before. It's so stupid. I blame it on my meds cause I always have to take food with them, and my one pill I have to take before going to bed. So that means I'm eating another snack after everything else right before sleeping...that's a recipe for disaster. DX Ugh. And I know I don't exercise much at all, but that didn't affect me before, thanks to my high metabolism. But jeez...now I just feel self-conscious. :(

Anyhoo, we went out today...went to a sporting goods store, Petsmart, and then got lunch. Got McDonald's, and the fries weren't hot at all, so we went back in to ask for a fresh batch. *rolls eyes* Mom and I are standing there waiting...and then I see some of the employees looking our way and whispering, motioning towards us. Gawd. I HATE THAT. I'm sorry, but I get incredibly paranoid when I see people whispering...I always think they're whispering bad stuff about me. And this time, I know I saw them look our way! Who knows what they could've been saying, but that didn't help my self-esteem today. ^^;;;

Yeah, so that was mostly my day. Then homework. Everyday homework. I'm tired of it. Summer's almost over, and I still have my summer classes to do. It's such a bummer. Oh, and my dad is back to nagging on me to get on that internship search...and to teach me how to drive...I don't like being around dad at the moment.

Sorry! Nothing but depressing rants. Well, I had to get this out. Whether you comment or not, fine, at least I'm getting this out of my system. I have to vent my frustrations somewhere. I feel like crap, so I want to shout it to the world! Oh, and the Phillies didn't help my mood out by losing today and yesterday. Lol. Argh. Agh!!!! I need some happiness back in my life! My usual therapist (aka Meg, innocent heart) hasn't gotten to text me very often, lol, so I'm really feeling bleh. I need her help. XD Ah well...hopefully things will get better...

*hugs* Thanks to whoever read this and super thanks to whoever comments. Take care.

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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

stuff! XD too lazy for a title.

Thanks for the comments last time on my posts, no matter which ones!! XD And on my cards and things. I love you guys~

Latest card, another Oofuri one. XD It's for the welcome to theO challenge. I think it really turned out cute. ^^ And I have another idea for an Oofuri card, dur hur. I'm really spamming the category now...to think, when I made my first Oofuri card...it was the first one in the category. And my walls might've been, too. Now the category is filling up quite nicely! Thanks to me (hehe), Ritona, and several other people~~ I don't like it when my favorite shows get popular, but right now, it's just getting more attention...thank goodness it will never be a "Bleach" show lol!

I heard one time, way back when, when Oofuri was being licensed that it was actually going to be shown on the MLB network. Glad that didn't pan out.

Since I'm on the topic of baseball, I shall move to the Phillies! They won again tonight!! ^__^ So that's 6 in a row~ And 9 in a row at home. After such a horrible time on the road, they come back here and do great. <33 Getting closer to the Braves, who are in first place! Most people had the Phils written off just a couple weeks ago. XD But now they're making a good comeback. I really hope this continues...at least for tomorrow because dad and I are going to the game! His bank gave him tickets--only 2. My mom so wishes they gave more, but nope...so it'll just be me and him, and it's going to be in one of the special suites. ^^ Hehe. So even though it'll be super hot and humid tomorrow, we'll at least have some AC! *spoiled* I told my dad he better sleep all day tomorrow so that he can stay awake to watch the game and to drive us home. ^^; Cause he goes to bed early (he does wake up around 3-4am all the time...)

Homework, homework. So I finished up my philosophy for week 3. That was the class that had 8 things to do! D: But I did them! I feel so accomplished. <3 But then...I feel sucky right away because, "OH WAIT THERE'S STILL MORE WORK TO DO TOMORROW AND THE NEXT DAY AND THE NEXT AND THE NEXT." ~__~ All I ask is for ONE week where I have a light load for these summer classes...just one. *sigh* This is such a crappy summer. I've said that a billion times already, but it's true! I wish I could enjoy my break, but what break? And we as a family haven't done anything special...I wanted to go to a theme park, or maybe go to the shore, but no. :/ I doubt that will happen. At least we're going to the bb game tomorrow. Last year we went to 3 or 4 games! But cause of these summer classes, there wasn't really enough money to spend on the area of fun. :(

I've had a migraine for 4 days in a row or so. Bleh. And here I went a good week maybe without any! Well, that was just...luck, I guess lol. Poor mommy and me. We both struggle with these so often. And our MCSS (multiple chemical sensitivity syndrome), which is...in case you didn't see the post where I explained, the strange allergy thing where our faces itch/burn when around things like new paint, perfumes, rubber, and basically anything weird. *rolls eyes* My face has been acting up a lot more recently, and I can blame dad cause it's always his fault! Stirring things up, introducing new things...using bug spray. Anything. Ugh! Stupid face. I hate looking in the mirror now cause it's usually red and spotty...irritated. And I just look bleh. :( I don't even think I can use makeup...that would irritate me. [I don't wear it anyway, but I'm sure it could help make me look less ugly lol]

All I want to do is just read for fun...but I hardly have any time cause of the homework. :/ I'm reading this book called Luck in the Shadows by Lynn Flewelling (sp?). It's really good. :3 I'm almost done with it. I'm always waiting, though, for the two main character (both guys) to get it on!!! XD Me and my love for BL. But there's hints here and there of them liking each other, but nothing happens. I'm almost done with the book, lol. I WANT THEM TO AT LEAST KISS, MY GOODNESS. *fangirls* There's 4 books in the series though, hehe, so maybe their relationship will develop later on? I hope. Alec x Seregil, please! >>'

Hmm...I think there was something else...oh, today I was removing the nail polish from my toes and fingers. ^^; And...well I was doing it outside, thank goodness. I accidentally spilled the remover. .___. And it spilled all on my legs and slippers! Ew. It was soooooooooooooo gross. XD I took the hose and sprayed all over lol. It was quite the mess. Just bad luck. Um, but that wasn't what I was going to talk about!! >.< But...I can't remember now. Probably something negative anyway, so I'll spare you.

*hugs* Thanks for reading. :) I hope you all take care now! <333

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Sunday, July 18, 2010

lots of things.

Thanks for the comment, lute! :) *hugs* And suarez...please comment ON MY POST if you're going to. If you don't bother reading or seriously commenting, then please, don't bother at all. Thanks. XD

I shall start off by saying that the Phillies are frustrating me to no end. I question myself about why on earth I still watch them lol! XD They've been losing so much. They won yesterday, but they're losing again tonight, and with our best pitcher, too. I mean, there's still tons of games left in the season...but being behind by so many games is frustrating! But what makes me mad is how they've been playing. They're not playing like the usual championship team that they are/were...ugh. I mean, sure, they could probably still come back and win tonight, lol, but I got fed up so I'm not watching right now. XD I'm not a bad fan, I'm just an easily angered one, haha. [/baseball rant]

Ok so anyhoo...I'm writing this post earlier than usual! Lol earlier than my usual past-midnight time. It's 9:40! Since I'm staying away from the TV at the moment, I figured I might as well!

Here's the card I made yesterday. :) It went through a lot of changes until it reached this final point lol. I mean A LOT. But thanks to those that have been hugging/faving/commenting on it. ^_^ I didn't even know she was from Hetalia.

Yesterday I had a lot of encounters with baby birds! Lol!! <333 Remember how I mentioned (I think) about how our birdfeeder tends to be a trap for the little birdies that can fit through the holes in it? Yeah. Well, this time a little baby chickadee was in it! I took a video of it first before saving the little guy. My dad wanted to take a picture of me holding the baby before letting him go, but the cute little guy flew off before he could. But he couldn't fly very far! Cause he was indeed a baby. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. he was SOOOO SOFT. Fluffy down feathers. ^^ Gah. Too cute. That was the first encounter with a baby bird! The next was after dinner, Mommy said there was one on her windowsill! It was a baby sparrow, just chirping away for his mommy and daddy. He just sat there. The window is pretty high up, and I guess he couldn't fly well either! So he just sat there and chirped. XD I took several pics and even a video, but here's just the "collage" I made of 3 of the pics I took of him. :3

After going away for a bit, I went back and noticed he was gone...so I guess he just flew off! He was so fluffy-looking, too. x3 I so wanted to open the window and pick him up...but if I did, he probably would've gotten scared.

While on dA, I came across this artist...my goodness gracious...they are TALENTED WITH SEXY MEN OMG. D: All they draw are super smexy bishies! My gawd I want them all!! *_______* I want them. ;__; How do people draw so well? Argh. If I could draw like that, I would also be drawing up my fantasies one after another. >>'

I've been doing a lot of homework lately. Of course. I have to for these classes! :/ But it isn't AS BAD...I mean, the stuff isn't necessarily hard, it's just time-consuming. You know, stuff that the teachers assign just to make sure you've read something or just to make you work...to work. I still have a paper and some questions on a video about starbucks to do for tuesday. Then I'll have to start on the stuff for my lifespan class. We had our first quiz in that class on friday. It was easy, but again, time-consuming. Online classes aren't terrible...just annoying.

Alright, one more thing I wanna mention...I think this will be it. XD But you know the mystery "allergy" that my mom has really bad, and that I sort of have? Where our faces get burny/itchy when around certain things? Like fresh paint, lotions, scents, chemicals, etc. Well, the other day my dad did some research about it. We're pretty sure we have multiple chemical sensitivity syndrome. In that video, the guy and lady say some reactions could be throwing up and headaches...well, for us, it's mostly more migraines, and then the itching/burning with the face. But that's what it is! And the unfortunate thing is that there's NO CURES for it. None. -__- So we're...stuck with it really. It's nice to see that we aren't just crazy with how we're feeling, but still.

Ok, sorry! This is a really long post. Or at least it looks like it. ^^; But I hadn't posted for a while, and I had stuff to say. SO THERE. I know a lot of people don't like reading long posts, so I get a piece of crap short comment, but whatever. I write this much cause I want to, and it helps me. Or something. XD So thanks to whoever read this! *hugs* I love you guys!! <33

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